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Living With Doubt (The Regret Series Book 2) by Riann C. Miller (3)

2

Jake

When I open the door to my mother’s house, the smell of a home-cooked meal hits my nose and I groan in delight.

“Jakey, is that you?”

“Yep,” I answer as Mom rounds the corner.

“I’m sorry you’re home, but I won’t lie and say I’m not happy to see you.”

Our season officially ended Sunday without us going to the playoffs. Overall, we had a shitty season, but once Chase, our quarterback and my best friend, went down with a serious concussion, only to never return, our season went to hell.

“You win some, you lose some. This year we ended up losing more than some.” I act like it doesn’t bother me that we didn’t at least make it to the playoffs. I turned thirty in August, so my chances of winning a Super Bowl ring are starting to dwindle—not to mention my current contract is up.

As a player, I had a good year, and my agent assures me he’s about to bring me a contract I won’t be able to refuse, but only time will tell.

“Well regardless, I’m glad to have you home.”

My mother is beautiful for her fifty-one years. Her blond hair is slowly showing signs of greying, but other than that, you’d probably guess she’s my older sister. In high school, I regularly punched any guy dumb enough to call her a MILF, but her beauty was never lost on me.

I walk over to the stove hoping to score something to eat. “Where’s Bridgett?”

“Oh, she’s at a party with some friends. I didn’t tell her you were coming in tonight because I was worried something would come up and you wouldn’t make it home.”

“What do you mean she’s at a party?” Images of my sister at some frat party cause a red haze to cloud my vision.

“She’s nineteen, Jakey. She has a life. When she’s not in class or studying, she’s out with friends.”

I pop my knuckles as I think of all the things that could happen to my baby sister.

“Oh, cut it out. She’s a grown adult. I was married by the time I was her age, so don’t go and give her a hard time about having a life that includes men.”

“Men?” I tsk, shaking my head.

“Yes, Bridgett has a boyfriend.”

“Why the hell am I just now hearing about this?”

“Probably because this is the reaction she was expecting, and I’m telling you to cool it. Carson is a good kid.”

“Carson,” I mumble. “What kind of fucking name is that?”

“Jake,” she says with a scolding tone.

I cross my arms over my chest as visions of this punk touching my kid sister float through my mind. “He better keep his dirty little hands to himself.”

“Really? That’s the attitude you’re going to have after all the women you’ve been with?”

My eyes widen and my stomach flips for a different reason than seconds before.

In college, I spent three years with the same woman. We were engaged and life seemed grand until suddenly it wasn’t. Since then, I haven’t been with the same woman more than once, and I’ve gone out of my way to ensure my bed partners never cross over into my personal life. As far as I’m concerned, I look like a fucking saint.

“What are you talking about?”

“Jakey, I know that girl hurt you. You’re not the type of man who’d ask someone to marry him if you weren’t all in, but you can’t allow one bad relationship to rule the rest of your life.”

My legs suddenly feel weak, and I have to lean against the counter to keep from falling over. “We were talking about Bridgett,” I quietly say as the shock of her comment continues to wash over me.

“Yes…you’re upset your sister is dating, but I have to tell you, she’s not the one I’m worried about. All the money in the world won’t do you any good if you continue to allow the seed of doubt that girl put in your head to control your life.” Mom’s face softens just before she takes a step closer. “I’ve waited on you after enough games. I have a pretty good idea how you spend your free time.”

Ouch.

I know what most of those women say. The ones waiting around after a game hoping to gain a player’s attention. The ones who pretend like they’ve been with you a hundred times already just to out-show the woman next to them, and my mom is telling me she’s heard that crap. The part that truly sickens me is, more times than not, she’s had my baby sister with her.

“You can’t believe everything you hear, Mom.”

“You’re right,” she softly says. “I only know what you’ve shown me. In the last nine years, you haven’t once introduced me to a woman, which makes those wild stories sound probable.”

Inwardly, I cringe, knowing she’s right. Crazy nights, random women, countless parties…they all seem like a good idea until your sweet mother politely announces that she knows you’re a whore.

“Okay. Enough about me.”

Mom gives me a knowing smile. “Let’s eat, then you can get settled into your room.” I give in and do exactly what my mom wants, except the part where I pretend my sister is an adult.

Instead, I log into Where’s my iPhone. Because I want to know exactly where Bridgett’s hanging out.

“Mom, I’ll be back,” I shout about an hour after we had dinner.

“Okay,” I hear just before the door closes behind me.

Twenty minutes later, I park almost a block from the frat house my sister is at. A few cars down, I hear a girl throwing up. To my right, I see a guy with his pants around his ankles, moaning. I don’t look long enough to confirm there’s anyone with him. Instead, I pick up my pace toward the house that’s overflowing with party-goers.

“Hey, baby.” A girl who barely looks old enough to attend high school attempts to grab my arm, but I shake her off and continue on my mission to find my sister. I walk through the door, only to discover the house is packed to the max with people. Finding Bridgett won’t be as easy as I figured.

“Hey, dude…you’re Jake Girard.” A guy catches my attention, but rather than respond, I force a smile and continue to scan the house. “Are you looking for your sister?”

This time, his comment causes my eyes to snap to his. “Do you know where Bridgett is?” Bridgett is my half-sister, and my mother stupidly gave Bridgett her father’s last name. If anyone here knows I’m her brother, it’s because she told them.

“Yeah, man. I think she’s in the kitchen with Carson.”

I don’t even wait long enough to tell him thank you before I take off in the direction I think the kitchen is.

Several kegs line the walls, which are surrounded by dozens of frat boys. My eyes continue to take everything in until I finally spot Bridgett. She’s leaning against the wall, talking to a couple of girls with a guy standing right next to her.

I take a few steps closer hoping to gain her attention. “Yo. What’s my kid sister doing at a party like this?”

Bridgett’s face lights up when she spots me. “Jake? Oh my God.” She wraps her arms around my neck in delight.

I watch as the kid next to her slowly takes me in. “And you are?” I ask with a hard tone once Bridgett returns to her spot next to him.

“Oh, stop it, Jakey. This is my boyfriend, Carson, and you’re not going to scare him off.”

I smirk because the look on Carson’s face says otherwise.

“N-nice to meet you,” he sputters, holding his hand out.

I wait a beat before I finally shake his hand a little harder than necessary. Carson wiggles his fingers when he pulls his hand away.

“Sorry,” I say with a sneer.

“What are you doing here?” Bridgett questions as her beautiful face lights up with a smile.

“My flight got in earlier today, and I wanted to see my kid sister.”

“Then let’s get out of here. We can head back to Mom’s and visit.”

“Sounds perfect.”

“Okay. I’ll meet you there in a few.”

I smile at Bridgett before I give Carson a sharp look. The way he had his hands on my sister’s waist when I walked up to the two of them tells me he knows her in ways I’d rather he not, but I force my brain to stop that train of thought and make my way back to my truck.

Half-dressed females are everywhere. Dancing on tables. Taking shots off each other’s bodies. Grinding against guys, standing against the wall hoping to be noticed. Absolutely nothing about this party holds any kind of appeal. I’m either losing my edge, or thirty is starting to kick my ass.

My phone buzzes with a text bringing me out of a deep sleep. I’ve been home for a few days, and Mom and Bridgett have gone back to their normal routines, which has left me with more downtime than I know what to do with. Last night, I drank a six-pack and watched a Warrior’s game…by myself.

Back home in Arizona, I go out with friends—at least when it doesn’t affect my ability to play ball—but I tend to keep a low profile when I’m at my mother’s house.

My phone buzzes again.

Kruse: Did you know Chase got that Carrie chick pregnant?

“What the fuck.” I groan as I haul my ass out of bed.

Until a concussion this last season, Chase Adams was one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL—he also happens to be one of my closest friends. I met Chase six years ago when I was traded to Arizona. He’s a funny guy, and the two of us hit it off right away. It only took one drunken night for him to tell me about the girl he’d loved and lost. No matter how much Chase loved Jordan, his father’s controlling ways won out, and Chase broke up with Jordan before he left for college. I’ve heard the saying “true love never dies,” but I didn’t know what that meant until I watched my friend miserably live a life most people only dream about. No amount of money or fame—or hell, even his career with the NFL—compared to the love he lost.

Knowing Chase as well as I do, I knew Jordan was a soft spot for him. But it wasn’t until he hit his head one too many times and woke up in a hospital bed believing the two of them were married that I realized just how much Chase truly suffered without her. That’s when I learned what a remarkable woman Jordan Taylor actually is. The chick flew out to Arizona, willing to do whatever she could to help Chase. I’m not a sappy guy, but I can’t deny I found it inspiring that even after ten years, the magic those two shared still exists.

If Kruse is correct, and Carrie, a woman Chase messed around with on a very rare occasion, is claiming to be pregnant, then she very well could wreck Chase’s new life before it has the chance to begin. I’m not about to let that happen because I’d be willing to bet my life on the fact that if Carrie is even pregnant, Chase isn’t the father. Carrie hung around Chase during preseason, but Chase hasn’t so much as even looked her direction in ages.

Me: She’s lying dude. She has to be

Kruse: She might be pregnant but no way it’s Adams’ kid

Carrie’s lie is sure to put a huge speed bump in Chase’s mission to finally land the woman of his dreams, especially if it’s true, but I don’t believe that for a second.

I open the browser on my phone and look up flights to New York. Chase is like the brother I never had, so that means I’d do anything for him. Selfishly, I know that’s not the only reason I’m willing to jump on a plane and fly across the country on a whim. There happens to be a spunky woman who’s managed to intrigue me for the first time in years.

Lacey Davis happens to be the complete opposite of the women I tend to take to bed. She’s short compared to my six-foot-five frame. She’s feisty and outspoken, and I generally look for women who will concede to my wishes after nothing more than my signature panty-dropping smile. Don’t get me started on her breathtaking blue eyes or her sexy-as-fuck East Coast accent. If I’m being honest, my attraction isn’t the only thing drawing me to her. I felt a distinct connection with her from the moment I opened Chase’s front door, and I think she felt it, too. Foolishly I thought she’d figure out an excuse to call me or show up at a game, but I haven’t seen her since the day she walked out of Chase’s house. Now I finally have an excuse to see if I still feel the same way I did months ago.