“What do you think of this building?”

I roll my eyes and push the paper Jake has in front of me out of my face. “I told you already, I don’t want to move to New York.”

My husband suspiciously looks at me. His dark brown eyes stare into mine while he waits for me to say something more, which isn’t normal. I’ve been known to talk enough for the both of us, but this is one time I’m staying quiet.

“A deal is a deal, Lace. My retirement is about to become official…therefore, it’s time we move to New York.”

My eyes soften. When I agreed to marry him, I was already jobless, so it made sense for me to move to Arizona with him. No matter how strong our relationship was, living apart for that many months a year was going to be hard. The second I agreed to move, he promised we’d return to New York when his contract ended—something at the time I was very much in favor of. However, that was years ago.

In the meantime, I’ve started up my own law firm in Phoenix that happens to be doing very well, and to be honest, I’ve grown accustomed to the weather here. I love how we can sit by the pool year round, and I haven’t needed a winter coat except for the times I return to the East Coast to visit my family, Jordan, and Caleb.

I practically hated Arizona when I first arrived, but like Jake, it grew on me in a way I wasn’t expecting.

“I found an amazing loft apartment that has a killer view of Central Park. There also happens to be ten floors that just recently came open less than a mile from there that we can rent for your firm.”

I grab his hand. “Jake, I wouldn’t need ten floors for years to come, maybe not ever. I only have three other lawyers at my current firm, one I’ve been establishing for the last five years.”

I smile again, reaching my hand up to the stubble on his face. “I want to stay here, not because I have to, but because Phoenix feels like home now…so unless you’re desperate to move, I want you to stop worrying about a promise you made years ago.”

“I don’t ever want to go back on a promise I made you.” He nervously watches me, which only causes me to laugh.

“You haven’t gone back on anything, that’s all on me.” I stare at him, knowing I’m about to make him speechless. “Plus, I’m pregnant, and the doctor told me I should take it easy until they know whether or not it’ll be a high-risk pregnancy.”

He arches an eyebrow, slowly processing what I told him.

Before we got married, I told Jake I didn’t want to have children. He needed to know in case that was a deal breaker, but it wasn’t. He swept me off my feet for a second time when he told me all he needed was me to be happy.

I didn’t lie when I told him I didn’t want children, but what I didn’t know at the time, I was still grieving the loss of my baby. I believe in my fucked-up way of thinking, I was punishing myself for what happened. Believing I didn’t deserve a child, worried I would ruin another life before they even had the chance to take their first breath. No matter how happy I was with Jake, the life we were building, I still had moments when I would break down and cry. I had a hard time being around the other players’ wives when they had their kids with them, and no matter how hard I tried to keep my pain hidden, Jake could somehow tell what I was feeling.

He all but begged me to get professional help, not because he needed me to be a better wife or lover, but because he couldn’t stand to watch me retreat back into my head. I wasn’t totally sold on the idea, but I could tell it was important to him, so I found a doctor, and over time, I slowly opened up. I don’t go to therapy anymore because I’ve finally forgiven myself, Jena, and even Bryan—something I never believed was possible. We were all kids, and everyone makes mistakes.

I remember the first time I held a baby—Bridgett’s baby, one I couldn’t run from no matter how hard I wanted to—but when my niece was placed in my arms, I felt…happy. The painful memories I expected never came. Instead, all the doubt I had about having children of my own started to melt away, and if I could’ve taken Annie home as mine, I would have in a second.

“Are you sure? I mean how many tests have you taken?”

I bit my lip, nervous he’ll be pissed when I tell him the truth. “I saw the doctor last week. He confirmed I’m eight weeks pregnant, and as of now, everything looks good.”

His eyes slightly narrow. “You’ve already seen a doctor?”

“Yes, and before you get mad that I didn’t tell you sooner, you should remember your season just ended. I wasn’t about to tell you something this big right before a playoff game.”

His shoulders sag as the tension he wore seconds before starts to drain. “Eight weeks?” he asks with a huge smile on his face.

“Yes…well, nine weeks as of tomorrow.”

“Holy shit, we’re going to be fucking parents.” He jumps to his feet and starts pacing the floor in front of me. “I can’t believe this is finally happening.”

Once I decided I was ready for a child, Jake jumped right on board; however, we found out getting pregnant wasn’t as easy as just having sex. Months passed and nothing happened. I started taking fertility treatments about six months ago, six long months of almost crying when my period arrived each month.

Last month, when I was late, Jake didn’t even ask. The Cardinals had made it to the playoffs, and he was doing everything he could to ensure his last season of playing was as successful as possible. Of course, he was hoping for a Super Bowl win, but that happened two years ago, so he wasn’t nearly as bummed when they lost last Sunday to Green Bay.

“It’s finally happening, and I want to raise our children here, not in New York.”

His eyebrows jump. “Children?”

I laugh. “I have no idea how many are in there, but if there’s just one, I was thinking we might have another. As long as this pregnancy doesn’t kill me.”

He closes the distance between us, bringing his hand up to my face. “I love you. I love you so fucking much.”

I fix him with a stare, one I hope appears serious. “I’m glad you love me. I hope that’s still the case now that you’re retired and about to sit at home being Mr. Mom every day.”

He fights a smile. “Mr. Mom?”

“Yes. I’m not about to leave my kids with a stranger, and after all, it’s not like you’ll be working.”

He tilts his head back as a deep grumble comes from his chest. When he looks at me again, one side of his mouth is pulled up into a smirk. “There’s nothing else I’d rather do with my retirement than raise our children. And who knows, maybe with these treatments you’re taking, you’ll pop out a few at a time.”

This time, it’s me who fights a smile. “Take it easy there, buddy. I’m a woman, not a dog, and I’m thinking two is plenty.”

“Two at a time works for me.”

Not giving me the chance to say anything else, Jake closes his mouth over mine, reminding me why life seems perfect—perfect in a way I had long given up on.

Things happen in life, things we don’t always have control over, and learning to accept that has been the greatest gift.

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