I want to start by acknowledging my girl, Karen. You know this book is for you. You have been with me for so long now, and no one deserves this more than you. I hope you love this book as much as I love you. I’m so lucky to have you on my team and supporting me. Thank you for all you do. Enjoy! Xoxo
I also have to give a big thank you as I do at the end of every book to my husband and son. They are two of my biggest supporters, and I couldn’t do what I do without their love and support.
To my street team, thank you for your continued dedication to my success. You ladies are out there on a daily basis promoting and sharing your love for my work, and I am forever grateful for each and every one of you.
Thank you to my amazing editor, Silla Webb, for putting up with my crazy ass. You do an amazing job and I’m so thankful to have you. You not only do an awesome job of helping me clean it up you make them look so beautiful when we’re done!
Thank you to my cover designer, Emma Rider. Girl, I know I tortured you with this cover, but your patience with me was amazing. Thank you so much for your hard work and dedication to making me a cover I was truly thrilled with.
Thank you to my readers, for which without you this book would mean nothing. I love bringing you new stories, and I truly look forward to hearing what you think about them. I hope you love Hustle and Heart as much as you’ve loved my other works.
Remove this and have the conversation with his mom in the living room
This is redundant because he explains this sitting in his recliner with the rules book.
If he’s reading the book in the recliner, did he even need to take it to the kitchen with him? Cause that’s where he left it, so he can’t have it now unless we revise that he left it in the living room prior to getting a water then tucking Grace into bed.
Okay, since he’s having convo with his mom shortly, I’d have him tell Grace to go brush her teeth and he’ll be right up to tuck her in. He sets his book down, grabs a bottle of water, then as he makes it to the top of the stairs, Grace yells. After he tucks her in, he goes to his recliner then has the convo with Josephine.
I’m still perplexed by this… if she went to school at Dartmouth shouldn’t she know most of the people? She wouldn’t be a total stranger. And ya gotta realize, WV is not like Mass… we have small towns, not cities.
Again, that just doesn’t make sense. She went to school there.
I guess that was a piece of me. I grew up in a city with a small town next to us and I didn’t know parts of it. She only went to high school there and she was bussed there so it could be that she didn’t learn the area, but I took it out because if it throws you off it will probably throw readers off
Gotta stay away from nodding.
You’re not clear on whether Della actually lived with him on base at any point. Though it does read as though she returned home after Grace was born. However, Josephine is the one who told Jesse that Della was using. So you need to be very clear about the timeframe of when she started using and her struggle with drugs, because reading back through it again, I’m confused on the timeframe.
Okay I think this should read better now
Karen is saying this, but isnt this Jason's first season? So how would she know unless she read it from the handbook? Should another mom make this statement, one whose kid played previously?
We were lucky. Our teams got practice uniforms and game uniforms. And our pants were black.
Our practice pants were white but our game pants were green.
I would like to make this email a different font so it stands out as an email please!
Sure!
Leaving this note for formatting!
Had Brian said this to her at some point?
Yes
Dude needs to brush his damn teeth before he goes kissin’ his momma’s cheek!
LMAO good point…That’s hilarious
But this is his solution? Okay, bye? Thanks for calling?
Since he tells his commander he’s waiting to hear back from his mom, he should close the conversation with Josephine with he’s going to see if he has leave or something just to appease her concerns, then check his bank account. The way it’s written it’s inconsistent.
Are they going from one school to another for weigh-in? Seems pointless when they are already at their school.
All teams have to be weighed in by pop Warner so they meet at one school at a specific time. I’ll make that more clear.
Okay I added something above hopefully that helps
You use this line too much.
Do guys really fist bump and hand shake this much? I have 3 boys and Boss and was team mom forever… our boys were never this touchy. A pat on the back for a good play was about it.
We do it often yes…I can try to take a few out…LOL
So why did they take a bus the first weigh-in? And why did they weigh-in the first time when they weren’t playing a game that weekend?
Are you good with this section? I did the italic because that is the message in her email back to him.
yes
Redundant… she just asked this
He’s not discovering this… she told him there were 2 more in the front.
She is telling… not showing what she sees in Gabe’s reaction. How can she tell? What are Gabe’s actions to show how he feels.
SHOW… what does she see? You don’t see to tell us she sees anything, you need to SHOW us what she sees.
She never carried the paint inside.
There was no response from Karen to Brian’s question, then it skipped right into Brian’s dialogue again.
Are they on a bench or the porch swing?
That would still be child abuse.
SHOW us
You gotta remember earlier on they complain they don’t have a vehicle big enough for everyone, which really doesn’t make sense unless her car is a sports car or a 2 dr coupe. So really you could remove that section to clear this up.
Well mom is here now. Karen has a car and he has a truck. Her car can only fit five and they six. The only way they would all fit in Karen’s car is if mom isn’t there
Show me what sees. Explain it. Don’t tell
show