Chapter 32

Molly called in sick to work, coming up with an ambiguous illness. Her boss seemed apprehensive at first, but Elodie came on to the phone and offered to take over Molly’s shift.

Only having waitressed once, Elodie was a little nervous leaving the house.

“You’ll do fine. Just smile and try not to swear as much as you normally do. The customers will love you and if anything goes wrong just give me a call. I really owe you one, El.”

The whole afternoon Molly laid in her bed reading books online about how to best raise a child as a single parent. Everything she had seen so far alluded to the societal reality that having two parents was better than one.

Unless the other parent is a total loser.

Molly’s phone rang and Elodie’s face popped onto Molly’s screen.

“Hey, El, something wrong?”

Molly had a feeling that her friend would have a hard time handling the suppertime rush. Elodie always teased Molly about how her job was so much harder than Molly’s, but today would be the tell all.

“No, it’s all good over here. Jim just came in with some more flyers. There’s a fight tonight at the gym down the road and I think it’d be the perfect opportunity to go and speak to Xander. To tell him what happened, yeah?”

Molly thought about what Xander’s reaction might be. If it was anything like the last time Molly had seen him fight, she was scared to even mention anything about this new development.

“I don’t know about talking to Xander when he’s about to fight someone. Doesn’t that seem a little like bad timing?”

Molly’s phone beeped.

“Check your texts. I gotta go, these customers are giving me some serious side-eye.”

Elodie hung up. Molly looked at her messages and saw that Elodie had sent her a photo. It was a flyer for the fight. In the picture stood two men Molly didn’t recognize.

Molly texted Elodie back.

M: Xander’s not fighting. Y go?

E: Johnny is. BFF. X will be in crowd. Perfect time to tell him.

With hours left until the fight, Molly decided to take a walk around her neighborhood in an effort to clear her head. She walked through the streets around campus, one hand resting on her stomach and the other hanging limply on one side. How could this happen, didn’t we use protection? Such a simple thought now, but at the time they had begun making love, both were apparently too impaired or aroused to actually put it into action. Now here she was, walking alone with a tiny human growing inside of her and no help in sight. Molly caught her own reflection in a shop window, and moved her body to the side to see if there was already a bump forming. As she looked at her stomach, she was carried away by the thoughts that were racing through her head. She continued her walk.

I’m not ready to be a mother. I’m too young, too inexperienced, and babies cost so much money, how will I ever afford it? I can’t go to Mom and Dad for help. I—oh God, what will my parents say? Will they be happy? Will they be mad? Of course they’ll be so disappointed, especially after they worked so hard to get me here. They both worked every single day, either teaching or tutoring. They saved, scrounged and never took vacations or even sick days, all so I could attend this university. And now what? Will I have to drop out? I’ll never become the person I wanted to be! How stupid could I have been?

Molly arrived at the park, and visibly troubled, sat on the side of the fountain and placed her head in her hands.

What kind of mother could I possibly be, anyway? Someone who only stresses out about her own selfish needs? I suppose I could look at my options. It’s not too late to get an ab—NO! Molly, come on, don’t even think about that. There are a lot of people out there that want to adopt a baby. Nice people, friendly people who have struggled to have their own and couldn’t. People who would gladly take care of this baby. But could I really live my life knowing there’s a little boy or girl out there who would never meet his or her birth mother? How could I even think about giving away a piece of me… a piece of him?

Molly rose, wiping the tears from her face. She saw a playground a little bit further down the path and walked toward it. A young girl was on a swing as her mother pushed her and a little boy slid down the tallest slide in the park on his mom’s lap. She knew in her heart that she needed to raise this child.

I suppose I could manage as a mother, like mine managed before me. I’ll get a job, and maybe when Xander learns about this baby he’ll be just as excited? Maybe I can find a cute little way to tell him. Bake him a cake with the gender inside? No, he needs to know before that. I’ll tell him tonight, if I can get him alone. I am going to be a mommy!

Calm now, Molly smiled to herself and began imagining all the things she and her child would do together. She pictured the three of them as a happy family, she and Xander working to give their child the most incredible life possible. For a moment, all of her worries vanished and time stood still.