Before we left Coach's house that afternoon, he’d pulled me aside out of earshot of Taylor. I didn't have to tell him what was wrong. He knew. I shouldn't have been surprised. He always did know how I was feeling before I voiced it.

“When I was your age, they told me I would never be able to play again. Do you wanna know what I told them?”

“What, Coach?”

“I told them they were wrong. Only I would be the one to call time on my career. Not some money-grabbing agent or senior doctor could tell me otherwise.”

“What happened? After they told you that you couldn't play?”

“I spent another ten seasons proving them wrong. Three teams, six trophies and named MVP in 83.”

“Coach, you were MVP? How come you never told us?”

“Would it have made a difference? We’re only as good as we allow ourselves to be, Jake. It doesn't matter how many trophies you win, or if you hold the top scoring title of your career. Even an MVP can fall on his arse. It's what we do after that the defines us.”

“Is that what you did?”

“Heavens, no. I grew old and realised there was more to life than playing ball.”

“So, you taught the game instead?”

“And I haven't regretted a single second of it.”

“You think I should give up, Coach?”

“I think you'd be stupid if you did. You're young, Jake. The game isn't over for you yet. You just gotta work for it. In time, this dry spell will become nothing but a distant memory.”

“I hope you're right,” I said, looking to Taylor who was watching from afar.

“I always am.”

I nodded and pushed my feet forward, hoping he was right. Just as I lifted my left foot off the ground to take another step, Coach pulled me back.

“Now that part’s out of the way, don’t you think it’s about time you spoke to your brother?”

I frowned.

“Don’t play dumb with me, kid. You think I don’t see it? The tension. The unspoken words… I see more than you realise, Jake.”

“I don’t know what you want me to do, Coach.”

“Talk to him, for a start. Whatever is going on between you both isn’t worth falling out over. You’re lucky to have each other. Some aren’t as lucky.”

When I opened my mouth to say something worthy back, he was gone.

We had each other, and while it pained me to admit that I had been wrong, I had, and deep down I knew just how lucky I was. Coach’s words had hit home, and I’d realised right there and then that he was right. I had been punishing myself for the things I couldn’t control and resenting Taylor for no valid reason other than to be an arse of a brother. And I was his brother. I wasn’t alone in the world. I had both parents, I had a handful of close friends, and I had Taylor. I’d stopped appreciating how lucky I was to have those people in my life. But that had been wrong of me to do. After all, who knew what would happen tomorrow? Who knew what curveballs were heading our way? Who knew if we’d be alive the next day?

I decided right then that I would start to make an effort. I’d try to be the brother Taylor needed and not the dickhead I had become.

I invited the guys out for drinks. There was no awkward silence, no making excuses to leave. It was just like the old days. Well, until Melanie and her friend burst through the door in a fit of giggles, clearly already wasted, and it all went to shit. Lola appeared anxious as she sat tucked into Taylor’s side. It was clear to all of us that things were about to take a turn for the worse. Even when we tried our best to ignore Melanie’s presence, I still found my eyes drifting back and forth, unable to completely block her out. I’d never seen her in that state before. It made me wonder what must’ve happened.

It turned out that I didn’t need to question it for much longer. She stumbled her way over, losing her footing on a stool that blocked her path, and I’d immediately rushed over to her. I didn’t even know why I’d done it. It wasn’t like her friend wasn’t there to help her out. But Mel was a mess, and there was no way her friend could hold her up.

I reached out for her, my hand gripping her waist so she wouldn’t fall. It was only when my eyes met hers that I realised the severity of it all. She was way past the point of wasted. Her eyes couldn’t even hold mine for more than a few seconds at a time before they rolled into the back of her head. All I could think was that she was going to pass out and there would be no one to help her. I found myself growing angrier at her friend for letting her get that way, so I lifted Mel into my arms and carried her out, ignoring Taylor’s protest as I did.

I held her to my chest as the cool air brushed across her bare arms. When I placed my jacket over her shoulders to warm her up, she let out a dreamy sigh as if she was exactly where she wanted to be. I tried to ignore how that made me feel as I climbed into the taxi with her in my arms. Her hair clung to her face, shielding a brown eye, and I pushed the stray hairs back and brushed my fingers across her cheek. She was so beautiful even with the slight frown on her forehead that made me wonder what had happened to her that day. I was still watching her chest rise and fall when the driver asked for the address. I didn’t have to think twice about my response. She was coming home with me.

The drive didn’t take long, and once I’d paid the driver, I held Mel’s limp body in my arms as I carried her down the side entrance to my place. Shifting her weight to one side, I managed to unlock the door and guide us through the dark doorway. We had just made it through when her eyes shot open, wide and afraid. When I dropped her to her feet, thinking she was about to tear into me again, she threw up, covering us both in vomit.

“Ah shit,” I cursed as I tried to hurry her to the bathroom while she continued to gag into her hand. I’d never seen so much sick in my life. That’s when I knew that I’d made the right decision by bringing her back to my place. And, strangely, I found myself getting pissed again. I was pissed at her friend for letting her get in this state and I was pissed at myself for caring so fucking much.

Once I’d cleaned her up and stripped her from her wet clothing, I laid her on my bed and waited until I knew she was safe and wasn’t going to chuck up before I went for a shower. I hadn’t been gone two minutes before a knock on the door had me turning the shower off, wrapping a towel around my waist and hurrying to answer it before they attempted to come in.

I pushed the door open, my eyes meeting Taylor’s before I glanced back and stepped outside, quietly closing the door behind me. “What are you doing here?” I asked, pushing my fingers through my hair.

Taylor frowned and cocked his head to the side. “I’m staying for a few days, remember?”

“Oh…”

“I told you the other day. At the dinner table. Were you not listening?”

“Yeah, sorry.” I shook my head, trying to appear as though I had just forgotten when really I hadn’t been listening at all.

“Jake, what happened back there? At the bar…”

“What do you mean?” I asked. I knew what he meant. He was referring to Melanie and the shit she spewed out. I didn’t know why she would think that. I may not have ever taken her out, but I wasn't ashamed to be seen with her. I never even gave her any reason to think that.

“Don’t play stupid, mate. Why did you take her home?”

“I didn’t. I brought her here.”

“You brought her here? Why would you do that?”

“I couldn’t leave her on her own, Tay. Not like that.”

“She wasn’t on her own. She had her friend.”

“The same friend who let her get wasted in the first place?”

“So? This is Melanie we’re talking about. It’s what she does.” Taylor’s voice was rising as he tried to understand why I would help her. He wouldn’t get it. Hell, I didn’t get it. “Look.” He sighed. “I know you’re a good kid and helping people is what you do—”

“Don’t,” I said, cutting him off. “Don’t patronise me.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I guess I just… I just don’t get it, that’s all. Mel? Really?”

“I felt sorry for her, alright? You saw the mess she was in. If that was Lola back there, what would you have done?”

“That’s different, mate. Lola isn’t Melanie.”

“No. No, she’s not.”

“I didn’t come for another argument, Jake. I’m worried about you.”

“You really don’t need to be,” I shot back sarcastically.

“Well, tough. You’re my brother and I do fuckin’ worry. That girl is her own worst enemy. Whatever she’s going through she’s brought on herself.”

“Maybe so, but if my memory serves right, it wasn’t so long ago that you were in her position. Who helped you then, ay? Me. I could’ve turned my back on you, Tay. Fuck,” I pushed out, my fingers tugging at my hair in frustration. “I was there. I fuckin’ stopped you from making mistake after mistake, and I could’ve just left you to it, but I didn’t. Where would you be now if your arse hadn’t been saved from sinking?

“And I’ve thanked you for that. Time and time again I’ve thanked you for saving my arse.”

“I don’t want your gratitude. It’s not about that.”

“What is it about then, Jake? You just want to help her, right? Then what? She’ll screw you over and you’ll become a bigger arse than you are already.”

“Don’t fuckin’ start,” I warned.

“I’m done,” he said, tossing his hands up. “I can’t sit by and watch this train wreck. She’ll screw you over. You know it. I know it. It’s just a matter of time.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No?” he asked, both brows raised high in challenge. “I’ve been there, remember? She ruined my life. Lola’s life. She was an evil, vindictive bitch back then, and from what I saw tonight, she still is. You saw the mess she was in, Jake. She’s crazy.”

“And I guess none of that was down to you, right? I mean, you slept with the girl, used her and threw her away like she was nothing the second Lola came along. And you wonder why she is the way she is.”

Taylor shrugged his shoulders. “She knew the score. And I didn’t hear her complaining when she had my dick down her throat.”

It was then that a feeling completely alien to me took over; a darkness I couldn’t control. It was overpowering, claiming my very soul until my fist collided with his jaw and his gaze swung to mine. My chest rose and fell heavily as my hand shook with aftershocks. I tried to focus on the throbbing that pulsed against the skin of my knuckles, but I couldn’t. All I could do was stare up at my brother and will that feeling to go away. The feeling that I could feel in the very depths of my soul. The feeling he wore long after he walked away: Hurt.