Chapter 18

Charles

I had a shitty night’s sleep and thought back to the poker game. I had lost, and it had been one of the few times I had ever done so. The money was not a problem; half a million was just chicken feed. It was the thought that I had lost to one card, and that card had just happened to be the queen of fucking hearts. I had scribbled princess on the note, and lo and behold, it was the queen of hearts that came and fucked me.

How could a woman, or should I say girl, have had this impact? Fuck, it had never happened before, so why had it happened now? I had been in control all the way until the last night. Or had I? Had I really had the control I had thought I’d been inflicting on her, or was my mind clouded by the fact she had indeed controlled me without either of us realizing? To top it all off, I wrote fucking princess on the note. What in the world had possessed me to write “princess?”

I felt like shit. I’d had hardly any sleep and could not face having anything to eat. Even since yesterday, the thought of food just made me want to puke. I was lightheaded and felt like I was walking on eggshells. Maybe I would get my shit together once I was back in the office. Maybe my work and my business could be my savior. I shook and mentally slapped myself and headed to the door. The car was ready downstairs, as it was Monday morning. I was ready to take on all the business the world could throw at me.

I arrived at the office and climbed out of the car. I felt dizzy as I walked into the reception lobby. Everything seemed blurred, and all I could see was the way to my office. I heard “good morning, Mr. Dillon” or “good morning, Charles” from all around me, yet I ignored it all. I just had to get into the office, my safe zone…where I could finally breathe again.

I sat at my desk and looked at the schedule for the day. I had a board meeting in an hour, and I hoped that would be the first thing to snap me out of it and get me back to normal. I entered the boardroom and sat at the end of the table. All the members walked in and took their seats. I listened as the minutes were read and each member ran through their line of business and what was on the agenda for the week.

I heard the information and it sank into my brain, yet I had not listened. I had not paid attention. I looked at the end of the table, and my mind cast itself back to my island office, where Elizabeth had blown me and I had spanked her over my knee. Every place I had looked or everything I had done since I’d arrived home had reminded me of her. It was not right, and it would only be a matter of time before it became totally obvious to everyone who knew me that there was something wrong.

The meeting ended, and everyone left the room apart from my good friend and longtime associate Mr. Rowling. He stood and walked to my end of the table.

“So, what’s up, Jay?” I asked as he sat in a chair next to me.

“Charles, I have known you for many years, probably more years than anyone else apart from Jonathan. I’m not sure if the others noticed you were not with it this morning, but I did. What’s wrong?” Jay asked as he leaned toward me.

“You know, Jay, it’s all gone wrong. I had an eventful time with a woman,” I said. “I’m just too old to feel run-down like this. It’s like I have this pressure constantly weighing me down.”

“Say no more, Charles. I know exactly what you are going to say. I have in my time had similar relationships with younger women,” he said as he chuckled and looked over his shoulder.

“It’s not like that,” I said.

“Charles, I know all about your silver case. Worry not; your secret is safe with me. You should hang on to her though. It only gets easier. She’ll help you feel young. You know the saying: You are only as young as the woman you sleep with,” he said with a laugh.

“Maybe, but I feel like shit. I’ve not eaten anything since yesterday, and I feel like puking,” I said.

“Bah, this is just the first stage. All that will pass. You go through hell at the start, and then come the happy days,” he said as he stood up.

“Thanks, Jay. I trust your judgment. I just hope I trust myself,” I added as we headed out of the boardroom.

I thought about the conversation I had just had with Jay, and I thought he made a valid point. He did indeed look young for his age, so something had obviously worked for him. I mean, he was like a dynamo for his age, so he must have had quite a few younger dates. I trusted his judgment and decided he was right. I needed to call Elizabeth and set it right. I needed to see her soon before it was too late.

I had a plan in mind when Jonathan walked into the office.

“Jonathan, to what do I owe the pleasure?” I asked as I swung my chair back under my desk.

“Charles, you need to get a grip. I saw you in the meeting. You are losing it,” he said in a raised tone.

“Relax. I have it under control. I’m fine,” I said, trying to put him at ease.

After talking to Jay, I was starting to feel at ease. It had been the thought of trying to forget Elizabeth that had been making me feel sick.

“Charles, you have lost control. You have—you have… Fuck, you have gone weak,” he said in a raised voice.

“It’s okay. I’m going to call her. I know what to do now,” I said as I leaned back in my chair, smiling.

“For fuck's sake, Charles, she’s never going to be a trophy wife, hanging on your arm or anything like that,” Jonathan said as he stood over me.

“She could be,” I said. “You don’t understand.”

“Wake up, Charles. It’s you who don’t understand. You are the boss of a billion-dollar company. You have the world watching you. You have shareholders you have to answer to,” he screamed. “Get a grip and get your shit together.”

“All right, just relax. I’ll do the right thing. Don’t you worry,” I said.

Jonathan headed out of the office and walked down the hallway in disgust. He was close to me and just had my best concerns at heart. Yet he had no way of knowing how I felt at the moment. I felt alive for the first time in a long time. I felt like I did when she and I were together.

“Mr. Dillon, you have the lunch appointment with the investors in an hour. Should I bring the car around already?” Lyndsay asked from her desk.

“If you could please. I’ll be downstairs in ten minutes,” I replied. Then I had a quick wash to freshen up.

I had an appointment with some new women from a company that had transformed virtual assistant working for single mothers. Their concept was new and radical and could be the future of home working, and that I would soon find out.

The car arrived at Pacino’s Italian restaurant; the investors had chosen it. It showed they had done their homework and paid attention. It was a classy joint. I should know. I own half of it.

I entered the restaurant and headed toward the table. I could spot the lawyers a mile off. They had the obligatory suits that stood out and could only be bought from the same store where the Secret Service bought theirs. The remainder of the table was taken up by women, and some fine women from the looks of it. They had the look of class; they had dressed for the occasion.

“Good afternoon, ladies,” I said as I approached the table.

“Well, hello, Mr. Dillon.” They greeted me in unison.

“Just call me Charles. It’s lunchtime after all,” I replied with a smile.

I sat next to Joanne, who was the brains behind the concept, and Elisa, who was their secretary and had her tablet ready for taking notes.

“So, ladies, do you want to eat first or get the business out of the way?” I said.

“Business before pleasure. Is that not right, Charles?” Joanne said with a small smile.

I was feeling like my old self for the first time since yesterday. I had paid attention. Joanne would make a move on me before lunch had finished; I knew it. I made a small wager to myself that I would be correct.

The ladies ran through their proposals and growth plans for the next five years. I had to say, they had fucking done their homework. Everything they said made perfect sense. They already had a small following of customers, and the market they were entering was quite new. They had even carried out surveys of single mothers who had the skills but not the computer equipment or Internet connection. The opportunity and the pool of resources were huge. Why had I not thought of this earlier? Their concept was simply that the company provided the equipment and connection and deducted this from their virtual assistant salary. It was simple yet brilliant.

I listened as the lawyers ran through their side of things. Joanne started to reach into her purse (which she had conveniently placed next to my leg). Here it comes… Without fail, she slid her hand over my thigh as she reached into her purse.

“Sorry, Charles,” she whispered into my ear.

“No worries,” I said, as to ignore what she had done.

We finished the first round of talks and decided to have lunch. Joanne said she needed the bathroom and placed her hand on my shoulder as she stood. There it was, sign number three. She was just too obvious with what she was doing.

Joanne returned to the table and again ran her hand over my shoulder as she sat next to me. I was waiting for sign number four, which would be the old napkin trick. I waited and watched. The waiters came and laid out a buffet-style selection of plates rather than individual servings.

I sipped on my wine and then took my napkin and laid it on my lap. I could have counted how long it would have been before Joanne seized the opportunity. My hand had just finished placing the napkin on my lap when my fingers were grabbed by Joanne. I turned my head and looked in her direction.

“Everything seems to be going well, don’t you think?” she asked as she leaned toward me.

“It does. Everything seems to be going just as I expected,” I replied.

She caressed my fingers as she pretended to adjust her napkin. It was good that I had my poker face on. She was hitting on me big time and would surely make a proposition before we signed the deal. Behind it all, I was thinking of Elizabeth, my queen of hearts who had stolen the show altogether.

Normally, I would seize this opportunity. Joanne was stunning. With four-inch heels and long black hair, she looked just like she could bend and be flexible, and she looked like she would enjoy being humbled and dominated. Behind my poker face, there was a different story. I had no interest in Joanne apart from as a business acquaintance. Anything outside that was out of my mind and out of bounds.

I excused myself and headed to the bathroom. My mind was full of Elizabeth. I had to somehow let Joanna know I wasn’t interested, yet be polite enough so as not to hurt her feelings.

I walked out of the bathroom and found her waiting for me. “Charles, what are you doing after the meeting?” she asked as she pressed me against the wall.

“I have a personal engagement, and it’s something I don’t want to miss. It’s very important to me,” I said as I moved around her and offered her my arm. “Come on, old friend.”

I had my plan clear in my mind, and as soon as the meeting was over, I was going to carry it out. I was excited for the first time in my long, fucked-up love life.

The meeting ended and the girls left. I remained at the table and took out my cell phone. What I wanted and needed was to see Elizabeth, but I still had to keep an element of control.

I texted the address and said to be there at 8 p.m. sharp, adding that if she didn’t respond, I would be out of her life. Forever.