What the fuck was I thinking? I wasn’t, that’s the problem.

Jesse is so fucking hot, and he made me so stiff that I couldn’t resist. And then that kiss… Oh God, the way his lips felt against mine was like he was sending a fucking electrical charge straight through my body, one that hit every nerve just right and left me filled with hunger…pure desire.

It was reckless of me to fuck around with Ty’s friend, and if it hadn’t been for Jesse being a fucking virgin, I know I would have followed through with it.

It would have been one thing if he’d just never had anal, but it was a whole other story to find out he’d never messed around with a guy.

Before I knew that, I thought we could have some fun, but I’m not interested in being his first time. His first shouldn’t be with someone who only wants him for his body, who wants to stick it in him to get off. It should mean more than that. He deserves better than that.

Although, I can’t help but regret not having fucked around with him. He was so delicious. He needed it so much. Like all he wanted was to feel my cock in his ass.

It’s been two days since we messed around. Since then, we’ve hardly acknowledged each other more than to be polite in front of Ty.

Jesse doesn’t say much to me. Doesn’t make eye contact. I can tell he’s upset with how I blew him off, and I’m fine with that.

Regardless of how pissed he is at me, it doesn’t change how hard I get when I think about him…or when he’s around, whether he’s on his phone in the kitchen or chilling with Ty on the couch. I think about Ty slipping away, giving us another opportunity to fuck around. But then just as quickly, I remind myself that he’s off-limits. That I have to keep my shit together and keep from letting this powerful lust Jesse stirs within me from controlling me again…leading me to making a big fucking mistake.

Not that he’d even want me after how I brushed him off.

I’ve tried to throw myself into work. Nothing major. Checking stocks and prospective investments my assistant, Vanessa, sent over to me. And I need to review some shit for taxes before I meet with my accountant this quarter.

I’m in the office of my condo, at my desk, looking out at the bay. A couple of boats are moving slowly across the sparkling water I wish I was out surfing on right now.

I hear a knock at my door, so I turn around. Ty’s standing beside it. “Hey, Eric.”

Sometimes I think he calls me by my first name to emphasize the fact that he doesn’t see me as his dad—that he can’t see me as his dad. It’s not something I blame him for. I understand why because I’ve never really been a father to him, even after all these years of trying to break through, trying to make up for lost time.

“You want to come hang with us tonight?” he asks.

I do. Not just because I want to be around Jesse some more, but because I want to have this opportunity to connect with my son.

“Come on, Eric. You’re here, I’m here. Let’s have fun.”

“Thanks. I’d be happy to go out with you guys.”

“Cool. We’re going to dinner, and then we’ll come back here and get ready to head out. Probably leave here around eight to eat. Mexican work for you?” His words are laced with sarcasm, and I don’t hide my amusement.

“Yeah. That’s perfect. I’ll see you guys then.”

He leaves, and I keep working until seven thirty. Then I get ready and meet them in the living room.

Jesse is sitting on the couch, wearing a button-up, jeans, and a pair of boat shoes. With his short hair spiked in the front, he looks about as adorable as I’ve seen him since we got here. I’m not sure if it’s because he actually looks hotter right now or if I only think that because I know how good it feels to have his body pressed up against mine. Although, I wish I knew a lot more. I wish I knew what it feels like to have my cock buried in his ass.

“Where’s Ty?” I ask.

“Still getting changed,” he replies without even looking at me.

As much as I want to talk to him about what happened, it’s not appropriate. Not exclusively because Ty could walk in here at any moment, but because I should just let it be what it was and move on.

Problem is: now it’s like an itch I can’t keep from scratching at.

“Okay, okay,” Ty says as he walks out of the master bedroom. He runs his fingers through his bangs, his hair going every which way down his forehead as he pulls his hand away. “You guys ready?”

“Yeah. Let’s do this.”

I feel like that’s the stupidest thing I could have said. Makes me sound like his old man, who’s too old to be hanging out with them. Although, that’s the truth.

We take a cab to dinner. Ty keeps the conversation moving. He’s good at talking a lot but not about anything at all really. Figure that’s one of the reasons we’re still struggling to get close after all these years. He can talk to me about his life until he’s blue in the face, but it still doesn’t make me feel like I really know who my son is.

He comes by that honestly too. I don’t open up to people. I’ve never been that way and never wanted to be that way, and it feels like when I’m stupid enough to decide to open up, that’s when people hurt me.

“So you never told me about Jesse on a board. Did he totally suck?” Ty asks as he sets his menu down.

Jesse eyes him curiously. “I didn’t suck.” He shifts his gaze to me. “Did you tell him I sucked?”

And of course my mind takes that to the worst place possible.

“He didn’t suck at all,” I say. “He actually did good for his first try.”

“How long did it take him to get it?” Ty has this sort of competitive look in his eyes.

“Five or six tries, I guess,” I say.

“It was a little more than that,” Jesse adds. “But Eric was a pretty good teacher. Is that how you learned?”

As soon as the words pass his lips, he glances around uneasily, like he should have known better than to ask that.

Ty and I exchange an awkward look before Ty says, “No. I learned in Florida, from a guy my mom hired to show me.”

Again, there it is. I can feel him fucking emanating this resentment.

And I also feel like there’s some jealousy toward Jesse, who hasn’t done a goddamn thing wrong.

“We should all go surfing one day while we’re here,” Jesse says.

Why the fuck didn’t I think of that?

“Oh yeah. For sure. Ty, we can go tomorrow morning if you want. I was just thinking this afternoon that I’ve been spending too much time working on stuff.”

“I don’t know. I haven’t really done it in a while.”

“You can get back in the swing of it,” I say.

He smirks. “Okay. Let’s do it then. Tomorrow morning. All three of us. Then I can watch and make fun of Jesse while he tries to get back that beginner’s luck.”

“I should’ve known this was a bad idea,” Jesse teases.

When we finish eating, we head back to the condo, and I consider bailing, just calling it a night. But Ty insists I come out with them, and I take him up on the opportunity.

Hell, I can always sneak off if I feel like I’m crowding them.

Soon, we’re making our way through a local bar Ty said the girl he’s been hanging out with here recommended to him. It’s not the sort of place I normally come to when I’m here. It’s mostly packed with tourists getting drunk off their asses, shouting across the bar, and waving their arms about wildly. Ty sees some guys on the other end of the bar and leads us over to them.

“Mandy,” Ty says as he approaches a blonde with bright blue eyes and a generous chest. “This is Eric.”

“Hi, Eric. Is this your dad?” she asks Ty.

Jesse glances between us, and I catch his gaze briefly. He must know how awkward this situation is, and once again, I wonder what Ty’s told him about me. How Ty really feels about someone calling me his dad.

I can only imagine, when the only thing he ever knew was a father who wasn’t there for him.

“Yeah. He’s…” Ty stops short of confirming who I am.

“It’s good meeting you, Mandy,” I say, hoping to distract from Ty’s uneasiness.

“Oh, you can tell, for sure,” she says. “You guys have the same eyes and jawline.”

Ty makes quick with introducing me to some of the other guys in the group, I’m assuming to deflect from how royally awkward Mandy just made that.

A brunette in the group keeps making eyes at Jesse like she wants to get his attention, and he smiles at her before making his way over to her.

One of the guys in the group is intrigued by my business experience and says he wants to pitch a business idea to me. Admittedly, I’m only half listening, mostly because I don’t believe there’s anything of value this early-twenty-something is going to share with me. But I try to keep engaged enough that if he says something actually novel, I won’t miss out or be unable to encourage him.

But I’m keenly aware of the girl Jesse’s chatting with.

Is he bisexual, or is he pretending to be straight like some of the gay guys I’ve known?

It shouldn’t matter to me what he is, but for some reason, the kid intrigues me.

I manage to slip away from Ty’s new friends for a drink and decide I’m going to stay away. As much as I wanted to keep getting assaulted with the one entrepreneurial kid’s genius plans for world domination, after hearing his third, ill-conceived, get-rich-quick scheme, I wasn’t interested in sticking around to hear more.

I sip on a glass of tequila and rum and turn my attention to a wall-mounted TV playing a music video from the ’90s. I wonder if it’s even something Jesse or Ty would recognize.

“Well, aren’t you the life of the party?” I hear behind me.

There’s a lightness in my chest as I turn to Jesse, who leans forward and rests his elbows on the bar.