After the three missed calls from the previous weekend, my parents hadn’t tried to get a hold of me. That was, until Thursday afternoon. During my Childhood Development class, I got a text message from my mom that said:

Alexa, call me as soon as possible.

I had been dreading this all week. It could go two ways: My parents could have realized after I ran out of the restaurant that they made a terrible mistake, they could apologize and tell me that they would never disown me or make me marry someone I didn’t love.

Or they could do the complete opposite. It was a toss-up.

I deliberately walked very slowly from the lecture hall to my dorm. I was thankful that it was the middle of the day, so no one would be around to eavesdrop on this conversation.

I always found it odd when my friends were embarrassed at how loving and affectionate their parents were with them in public. I remember Gia’s parents helped her move in. She rolled her eyes every time her mom took a picture or gushed about how nice the dorms were.

She groaned when her dad’s eyes filled with tears when he told her how proud he was of her. I was far more embarrassed that my mom hired a moving service to move my belongings because my dad was out of town and my mother refuses to do manual labor. I was embarrassed that my mom was forcing an engagement onto me and that my dad couldn’t say no to her.

I took a deep breath and called.

“Alexa,” she answered, already sounding exasperated.

“Hi, mom.” I didn’t ask why she was calling, because I had a suspicion I already knew.

“I just want you to know how utterly humiliated I was last weekend. I’m still furious about it. I haven’t slept well all week,” she said dramatically.

“Me neither,” I retorted.

“I hope you feel guilty about what you did to me,” she said. “Everybody at the country club knew that Sebastian was going to propose. I had already booked the last weekend in September for the wedding. A fall wedding in Martha’s Vineyard, Alexa. Do you know how many girls would kill for that?”

“I don’t want to get married, Mom. Not right now, anyway. Especially not to Sebastian.”

“But why not Sebastian?” she cried. “He is handsome, smart, and comes from a good family. He is perfect for you.”

“I just don’t like him in that way. Why don’t you understand that?”

“What way, Alexa? Some day, you will have to grow up and enter the real world. Do you think that any of your female prep school classmates are still single? At your age? Marriage is not some fairytale. You find a nice man that can give you what you want, and you learn to make your relationship work.”

“I don’t care about that stuff. I want my own career. I want a healthy relationship with someone I choose,” I insisted.

“You don’t understand, Alexa. You are not some middle-class girl or average person. An average life may seem romantic to you now, but you will surely regret it. You’ll have to cook your own food, clean your own house, and do your own laundry. If you want a new car or house, you’ll have to take out a loan from the bank. You can say goodbye to summers in the Hamptons and skiing in the Alps and winters in Bali. None of these things will be available to you.”

“Fine, then I’ll trade the Jaguar in for a Honda,” I scoffed. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Maybe not for you, but how do you think I feel? My friends will ask ‘oh, how is Alexa these days?’ and what do I tell them? You’re a school teacher with husband that works in insurance or something? Can you imagine the look of pity they’ll give me?”

That I could understand. These were my friends’ mothers, people I grew up with. Their favorite pastime was comparing status symbols. Their children were the ultimate status symbols. I could almost hear their whispers at the mention of my name. It still didn’t make it okay, though.

“Are you still there?” my mom asked.

“Yes,” I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry that you felt embarrassed. I was embarrassed, too. You put me in a very difficult position. I don’t want to hurt anyone, but I have to put my needs first.”

“So selfish,” my mom hissed. “How can you say that to me, after all I’ve done for you?”

“What have you done for me besides stand in my way at every opportunity? You throw money at your problems to make things seem even. It’s not even close. You can’t put a monetary amount on the disappointment and disapproval I’ve experienced from you.”

“I see,” my mom said, eerily calm. “In that case, I will stop ‘throwing money’ at my problems. You’re a big girl, Alexa. If you want to live your own life, I will not stand in your way. I gave you a chance to do the right thing and marry Sebastian. I will be dissolving your trust fund. I am canceling our credit cards in your name.”

“Mom,” I stammered.

“I will have your things put in a storage locker. Do not bother coming home when school is out. This is no longer your home.”

“You can’t do this,” I cried. “What about Dad?”

“Your father isn’t too pleased with your behavior either,” she said. “If he wants to see you, he can get in contact with you. I’m done, Alexa. If you change your mind about Sebastian, then we’ll talk.”

She hung up. I sat on my bed in stunned silence. Her response didn’t seem justified. I wasn’t asking for much; I just wanted to have a choice for my future. I felt sick.

Maybe she was right about me not knowing how to live on my own. I had a few thousand dollars in a bank account, but that was it. I didn’t know anything about money management, because I never needed to. I bought things because I wanted them, and I usually didn’t even look at the price tag. It just wasn’t something necessary.

I heard Sasha come through the door. “Alexa, I’m going to the dining hall. Want to come with me?”

“I’m not hungry,” I answered.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. She could always tell when something wasn’t right.

“It happened,” I sighed. “My parents cut me off and my mom told me not to come home at the end of the semester.”

I gave her the highlights of the conversation. She looked shocked, sad, and angry all at once.

“How can I help?” she asked.

“Help me forget about this,” I said. “We’re going over to Martin’s tonight.”

* * *

At nine o’clock, we knocked on Martin’s door. I wasn’t really in the party mood, but I needed to get away from my racing mind. Reg had a devilish grin on his face when he answered the door.

“You’re the first guests to arrive,” Reg exclaimed.

“Besides Sasha, Gia, and I, who else did you invite?” I inquired.

“No one, really. Martin said. “But people will show up. They always do.”

I sat down at their table, fiddling with the wrapper on the bottle of wine that I brought. This wine was much too good for a college party. It would probably be the last expensive bottle of wine I ever enjoyed.

“Let’s play a game,” Sasha suggested. “How about, Never Have I Ever?”

We all nodded in agreement and poured ourselves tall drinks.

“I’ll start,” offered Martin. “Never have I ever visited a foreign country.”

Sasha, Reg, and I took a drink.

“Never have I ever gone skinny dipping,” Reg added.

Martin, Sasha, Gia, and I took a drink.

“Never have I ever played football,” Sasha giggled.

“Hey, that’s cheating,” Reg said playfully. Reg and Martin took a drink.

“Never have I ever been cut off and disowned by my parents,” I said flatly.

Seeing as no one else had experienced this in their life, I took a long pull from my glass. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me. I made quick eye contact with Martin. His eyes were wide with surprise and worry.

“Let’s play something else,” Gia said quickly. “I have a deck of cards in my purse.”

With a few more drinks in my system, I was starting to feel a lot better. We played some card game that Gia knew how to play, but no one else really understood. This resulted in a lot of drinking.

“You girls are not messing around,” Martin said after finishing off another beer. “I shouldn’t be surprised; I already know that Alexa can drink me under the table.”

“Yeah,” Sasha added. “But then you’ll find her under the table as well.”

Everyone laughed. There was no use defending myself after the great final game debacle.

Martin and I were getting along really well. I was afraid that things would be awkward after we talked, but he was really cool. I realized that we had a similar sense of humor and we liked the same books. I really felt like we could be friends. It would have helped if he didn’t wear t-shirts that revealed his perfectly sculpted arms, but I could learn to ignore them.

“We’re out of alcohol.” I announced to the group around eleven-thirty.

“No problem,” Martin said. “Let me make a quick phone call.”

Sasha kept smiling and raising her eyebrows at me while Martin was on the phone.

“What?” I hissed under my breath.

“You two are in love. You’re so perfect together; it makes me want to barf.”

“We’re friends,” I whispered back.

“What’s the point? You’re already cut off, you can do whatever you want now.”

In a sense, she was right. However, I had a slight hunch that I could appeal to my dad if I needed to. If they found out that I was dating a football player with no family connections, they would lose their minds.

“I’m hoping it will pass,” I said, not wanting to explain myself.

Minutes after Martin got off the phone, there was a knock on the door. When he answered, a group of football players crowded in, each holding various types of alcohol.

“These are the perks of being the captain,” Martin said with a wink. “Choose whatever you want.”

I grabbed a bottle of some kind of vibrant green liquor. I took a sip straight from the bottle. It was super sweet and fruity. Too sweet. I poured some in a glass with ice and added a splash of soda.

“Be careful with that stuff,” Donny said. “It almost tastes too good.” He turned to his teammates, “I give it to all of the girls I hang out with.” No one was amused.

“You’re truly a terrible person, Donny,” Martin said.

“Ooh,” Donny teased. “Sounds like someone is jealous that he hasn’t been laid in a while. I bet Alexa here can help you with that.”

I could see the anger burning behind Martin’s eyes.

“Ignore him,” Martin said directly to me. “You don’t deserve to be talked to like that.”

His face was so serious, something that I didn’t see often. He was usually smiling or cracking a joke. I felt safe, protected. His eyes were so soft and comforting. His jaw was so strong and square, and I had the sudden urge to put my hand on his defined cheekbones.

“Don’t worry about,” I said. “I’ve heard it all before.”

I grabbed his wrist and brought him back to the table. Someone brought a trivia game over and we took a drink every time we got an answer wrong. It was so stereotypically Ivy League of us, playing trivia at a college party. This game became more challenging the longer we played because the alcohol wasn’t helping me recall facts from my memory. Eventually, I got bored and starting taking shots with some of the football players.

I was getting tired of standing around, so I took my cocktail over to the couch and plopped down.

“Feeling alright?” Sasha asked.

I just smiled stupidly. Coherent language was too difficult at this point.

Gia looked concerned. “Are you okay? You usually don’t drink this much. Do you want me to take you home?”

“I’m fine,” I slurred. “I’m not even that drunk. Honestly.”

They weren’t fooled by my lie. “I’ll get you a glass of water,” Sasha said.

Suddenly, Martin was sitting on the couch next to me. I was so happy to see him. I put my hand on his knee, sliding it up his strong thigh.

“You’re drunk,” he said with a grin.

“You are,” I replied.

“Not as drunk as you,” he countered.

I wanted him to take me to his room and kiss me. I wanted to feel his body, to be close to him. I wanted him to be mine, if just for one night.

“I’m going to get another drink,” I said. “And then I’ll be right back.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he said.

On my way back to the kitchen, I peeked into Reg’s room. Sasha and Reg were making out. I smiled, but felt a pang of jealousy. If they dated, I’m sure their parents would be thrilled. I wanted that. Now.

I slammed a shot of vodka since that was easier than making a cocktail. I walked up to Martin, looked him straight in the eye, raised one eyebrow, and walked into his bedroom.