Cricket speaks with such ease, unconcerned over the reaction to her words. Win or lose, she’s comfortable in her skin. I focus on her with the hope of soaking in her confidence. Pushing the front strands of my hair behind my ears, I want to stop hiding, freezing, and fearing. I need to be stronger now that my mom is no longer here to guide me.

Cricket sits next to Murphy who leans across the table to feed Minnow. The little girl takes her sausage and leans across the table to shove it in his mouth. Poet shakes his head and says something about twins being weird.

“Stories about childhood are important,” Cricket muses. “Even embarrassing ones like how Poet shit his pants during an extremely violent bout of the stomach flu. See for anyone else the image of him vomiting so hard that he squirted diarrhea might be gross. Or even funny.”

“I’m eating,” Hayes grumbles.

“Good job, buddy,” Cricket says and then focuses on me. “But when I heard that story about Poet from his stepmom, Justice, I found it charming. He was so young back then. Probably didn’t even shave yet. I imagined him crying afterward and needing love from his parents to help him calm down.”

“How old were you when this squirting took place?” Chipper asks—of course.

“I think he was like sixteen.”

Poet snorts. “Try twelve.”

“Well, then don’t make fun of twins anymore.”

“Try to stop being weird.”

Cricket cocks an eyebrow. “Try to suck a melon-sized dong.”

“Try to stop making me think of you on your knees.”

“Try you two shutting the fuck up,” Hayes growls.

“Your angry father is right,” Candy announces. “You’re acting like shitting children. I mean, shitty.”

While Cricket laughs at her mom’s dig at Poet, Hayes sighs. “Didn’t you say something about shitting in the bathtub after giving birth?”

“No, I didn’t, but thanks for confusing me with some other whore. Try not getting any knee action for a long while.”

Hayes gives her a dark look. “You never get on your knees.”

“I’m in my forties, honey. Of course, I don’t get on my fucking knees. What if I can’t get back up? Or what if my knees make such loud old lady creaking noises that I can’t hear your Life Alert go off?”

“Boom!” Cap hollers and everyone—except Hayes—laughs. Even the waitress and cook in the back snicker. Candy winks at her youngest who grins at his father’s clear annoyance.

I’m afraid to join in the fun and laugh too. They’re so mean to each other, yet don’t seem to actually hurt their targets. Cricket and Poet finish up their tiff by switching seats with Minnow so the mini-twins can be weird together while their parents cuddle.

“Are you going to finish your bacon?” Chipper asks, nudging me gently.

Shaking my head, I pick up the slice of bacon to hand it over. Chipper bites into it rather than taking it from me.

Chipper has a subtle way of letting me know he’s focused on me throughout breakfast. No big shows of affection, he instead orders a refill of my orange juice without me saying anything. He hands me a napkin when I manage to drop mine under the table. Throughout breakfast, Chipper acts as a protective wall between his family and me. Even when I relax some, he doesn’t draw attention to me. He just quietly lets me know he’s thinking of me while I get accustomed to the ruckus behavior of his family.

I assume breakfast is ending when Cricket and Poet take their restless twins out to the car. I wait for Chipper to signal our exit too, but he orders another cup of coffee instead.

“When you’re done, we’ll walk next door to the office, and I’ll show you our HQ.”

“I’m still unclear what I’ll do as your assistant.”

“So am I, but that’s what makes it fun as fuck,” Chipper says, grinning. “We’ll figure shit out together.”

I grin at his expression until Cap startles me by standing. The massive teenager walks over to Candy and leans down until his face is next to hers.

“I’m ready to work on math,” he says in a voice too deep for someone so young.

Candy finishes her coffee with a gulp before following Cap out the door. I watch them go, hating how much she looks like Mom from the back. Their loose blonde hair falls in the same way, and I shiver overwhelmed by a sense of déjà vu.

“We can hang out here and talk to Hayes about his fear of koala bears,” Chipper says, noticing my sinking mood. “Or we can mosey over to the office. I know I prefer the one I haven’t done at least a million times.”

“Kid,” Hayes says, glancing at Chipper, “fuck off.”

Laughing, Chipper slides out of the booth. “Right back at you, Dad.”

I follow Chipper out of the restaurant, across the parking lot, and to the next-door bunker-style building where Candy sits at a desk.

“Four people called for you yesterday,” she tells Chipper. “I only got the names of three of them because the last one copped an attitude. Talk to your minions about watching their manners with me.”

“My minions already know your ass requires kissing. I’d guess that particular loser was someone I didn’t want to talk to anyway.”

On one end of the office, Candy’s desk is joined by two others. Behind them is a door covered with signs reading, “Warning!, Danger!, Radiation!, Flammable!, Toxic! Explosive!” I assume the door leads to Hayes’s office.

Chipper gestures to a desk with nothing on it. “This is mine. If you ever drop by, feel free to work your ass groove into the chair.”

“Wait, what do you do here again?”

Chipper glances at Candy who smirks even while never looking up from her laptop. When his gaze returns to me, I realize I don’t care what he does. I just want him to always look at me with such heat.

“I’m organized,” he says, pulling open a drawer with files stacked. “I oversee several legal businesses, and all their info is right here and on my laptop in the car. The other, less legal, aspects don’t need a paper trail.”

“Now you sound like Hayes,” I tease, wanting so desperately to fit in with the cool kids.

Chipper leans down and whispers in my ear, “Stop getting me hard around my mom. It’s just not nice.”

Despite no doubt blushing as bright red as a baboon’s ass, I only smile at his comment. Chipper is so obviously testing my resolve, and I want him to know I can hold my own. At least with him.

I’m less confident about taking on the entire wacky clan when they’re at their most acerbic. Still, I know in my heart that Chipper and his family offer the best opportunity for me to dig my way out of my grief and start anew.