I needed a scene badly. A good, heavy scene. While I was on my break, I logged into Kinky Links and looked at some sexy images. Today must be my lucky day because there were several that were making me hard. There were three new images by a few Doms that showcased their subs/slaves tied up in a combination of rope or chains.

The chains got me going. Not only was the sub in chains, but it was a male sub. There was a blindfold around his eyes, and he had a ball gag in his mouth. The chains were pulled tight across his chest; I could tell with the way his skin was depressed.

This picture turned me on like crazy right now, and I actually jacked off in the men’s room to it before going back to work. All through my shift, it was such a struggle to keep my mind focused on anything but the picture of the man in chains.

I needed a scene like that; to bind and beat.

I thought about going to Irons…without Amy. Today was Masochist Monday at Irons, so there is an excellent chance that there are some lovelies who needed what I need to give. I called Amy during my last break and came up with a story about a study group for my recertification exam.

“Hi, princess, how has your day been?” I asked.

“Good, Master. I hope yours has been good too,” she said eagerly.

“Just fine, Amy. I’m calling to let you know that I’m going to be late this evening. I found out about a study group that is meeting tonight. They’re supposed to have a special study guide for the re-cert exam, and I’d like to attend. Will you see to it that you are fed and taken care of this evening?”

“Yes, I can do that,” she said.

I noticed that she didn’t sound too disappointed that I’d be a little late. I took that as a good sign.

“Wonderful, princess. I will be home by 11:00 p.m. and then we’ll fuck.”

I knew damn well that I wasn’t going to fuck anyone at Irons tonight. Fucking is reserved for Amy. I also was quite certain that I would be in need of a hard fucking after binding and beating on someone tonight. By the time I get home, I should be able to fuck Amy roughly enough to satisfy my needs without tearing her to pieces.

“Will you tie me up tonight?” Amy asked.

“Yes, princess. I think I should be in the mood to tie you up tonight. After you eat dinner, I want you to play with yourself in the bathtub. Finger yourself, pinch those nipples, but do not come. Understand?” I instructed.

“Yes, Master.”

“See you tonight, princess.”

I figured that giving her a task to toy with herself would keep her happy while I was at Irons and she’ll be prepped and primed for an orgasm when I get home. As soon as 7:00 rolled around, I practically ran to my car so I could get to Irons in time to negotiate a scene with one of the seasoned masochists before they were all taken.

“Fucking hell,” I swore under my breath as I pulled into the parking lot and noticed that not only was Everett’s expensive special edition BMW parked in the front, but so was Graves’.

God help me if I even come close to Graves tonight. I repeated a line from one of my favorite songs that always reminded me to maintain control. “If I keep self-control, I’ll be safe in my soul.”

After I checked in, I walked with purpose over to the negotiation area where all of the unattached subs hung out each evening. I scanned my options as I approached and when I saw Bracken, I grew more excited. Bracken wasn’t as dark as they came but she would most certainly do just fine tonight.

As I approached her, I noticed that Blake and Cathy’s boy toy, Noah, was strolling around. Jesus fucking Christ. I could use a dose of him. He was sturdy and built well and could probably walk away from a scene with me tonight. Bracken could too, but a need to play very rough was pulling me toward Noah. I stopped and rubbed a hand over my face. I’d have to clear this with Daddy Blake.

I decided to try my luck with Noah before Bracken was taken. I caught Noah’s attention and motioned for him to come over.

“Yes, sir, Master Paul?” he respectfully asked.

“Noah, if I obtain proper permission from your daddy, would you be interested in a heavy scene tonight?”

He blanched and innocently looked around.

“Don’t be a pussy, Noah. I know you serve Cathy, but you’re a man. You can take it like a big boy.”

“Yes, sir. If Sir Blake wishes.”

“Good boy. Where might I find him?”

“He’s upstairs in the medical room playing with Kelsie, Master Paul.”

I nodded and bolted up the stairs. I found the medical room and the glassless window frame was open. Blake rarely closed blinds; he liked others to watch.

He had Kelsie up on the exam table, knees bent, legs spread and was giving her a rectal exam with his finger. Kelsie cooed and giggled as Dr. Blake tested her tight hole. When he was satisfied with the exam, Blake withdrew his finger and applied more lube to her puckered hole. Then he pulled his hard cock from his pants, lubed it and pushed himself into Kelsie.

“Mmm, Daddy!” Kelsie cried out.

These two were just getting started, and I wasn’t going to wait around for permission on Noah. Bracken would have to do. Returning to the main room, I could see that Bracken was still standing over there alone.

“Bracken, I’m looking for some rough play tonight. Bondage and a beating. Are you interested?”

“Yes, Master Paul,” she replied with a smile.

“Any places that I should avoid?” I asked as we headed to the dungeon.

“My face, sir.”

“Fair enough, Bracken. Your safe word is ‘red’ for tonight.”

I looked up down the stone hallway glancing for an empty stall. There were several, and when I heard fucking Everett’s voice coming from a stall, I had to look in. Colin Everett was playfully spanking a girl on the bench while the girl was sucking on Graves.

Conveniently, the cell across from them was vacant. Naturally, that was the one I selected. After Bracken was naked, I guided her into position on the floor facing the hallway. That way I could still catch what went on in the cell across from us. I might even get myself a new pic of my little muse.

I made quick work of wrapping Bracken in rope and checked for tightness. I wasted no time and took a strap to her back, the top of her ass, the top of her thighs and took a cane to her exposed breasts.

Across the hallway, Colin and Anthony were both fucking that sub. As much as I tried blocking out Anthony’s sounds of pleasure, they rang out with crystal clear clarity in my head. It made me strike Bracken harder.

I wanted to be the bastard that forced him to make those sounds.

Thwap!

I wanted to be the one that gave him pleasure and a release through physical pain.

Thwap!

I wanted to feel his throat constrict as he choked on his plea for mercy.

Thwap!

I wanted to be the one he shamefully sought out for the release that I can give him that isn’t like anything else he’s experienced.

Thwap!

“Fuuuuck!” Anthony grunted as he unmistakably came.

Thwap! Thwap! Thwap!

My eyes were transfixed on Anthony in the other cell. Watching him come down and withdraw from the sub, I imagined the load he just embedded inside her.

Thwap!

And right there in the mix of it was Colin fucking Everett.

Thwap! Thwap! Thwap!

Everett put his fucking hand on Anthony’s shoulder as he sat down on the floor with the girl in his arms.

Thwap!

This was something rare; Graves holding the girl afterward. Usually, it’s that fucking prick, Everett, who does the cuddling.

Thwap!

Everett walked around in the stall, naked with his dick flopping around. He draped a blanket around the girl and Graves. I clenched my teeth together, and I swear that if my mouth was any tighter, I could have broken some teeth. Colin crouched down and rubbed on the girl’s back over the blanket and kept his hand on Anthony’s shoulder. He was fucking giving care to the girl and Graves.

I wanted to do something to him that made him need care. I was so fucking pissed.

Thwap! Thwap! Thwap! Thwap! Thwap!

“Red, Master Paul,” Bracken whimpered.

Red?

No, not red. I took a step back and looked down at Bracken. Oh, fucking hell!

“Dungeon Monitor!” I yelled out and knelt down beside Bracken. “Be still, Bracken. I’ve called for a monitor. They’ll bring medical supplies.”

I looked up at one of the monitors coming into the stall.

“What happened, Paul?”

What the hell had happened? I was asking myself the same question. I needed to fess up. I wasn’t paying attention. Not as much as I should have been.

“I think I got to be too much. I was too rough. I didn’t see the warning signs of her getting close to the edge, and I didn’t keep a close eye on her skin,” I admitted.

Of course, I didn’t fucking see the warning signs because I was fucking watching what was going on in the other goddamn cell.

Bracken’s body was a bloody mess. And this girl took everything as much as she could. Fuck! Suddenly I pictured Amy in this condition.

Soon, Matt was in the cell and took over with cleaning Bracken up. I stayed by Bracken but noticed Colin and Noah standing in the hallway. I wanted to knock the expression right off Colin’s smug ass face. Noah looked as though he knew he could have been in Bracken’s spot tonight.

“Don’t you need to tend to your boy and girl, Everett?” I called out to him. When he shook his head at me, I became even more annoyed. “Go back to your little girl and boy.”

“Paul, stop yelling, man,” Matt urged.

And wouldn’t you know it, fucking Blake arrived. Just perfect. His behavior worried me the most because he hadn’t asked me what had happened. He spoke to Bracken and watched Matt clean and bandage her back.

“Bracken do you have a roommate or a friend that can help you clean these and bandage them tomorrow?” Matt asked.

“Yes, Shelby is my roommate. She can help me,” Bracken said.

Thankfully the young lady had a friend in the kink community to assist with tending to the wounds. I took no pride in what happened. Yes, being rough was what I needed tonight but I hadn’t paid close attention, and because of that, I heard her safe word. I’ve caused a handful of people to say them over the years, but for the most part, I do an exceptional job at maintaining control. I’m able to take them to their edge without going over. Tonight was one of the exceptions.

Considering what I did to this girl’s back, I was surprised that she was still so talkative. Even more shocking was that she was still talking to me. I sat upstairs with her while she drank a bottle of water and I waited with her until her roommate was finished with her scene and ready to leave.

Now, somewhere between Irons and home, I needed to sort my head out. I had so many questions now about where I was really heading with Amy. I knew she would be disappointed tonight. With so many questions on my mind, I had no business tying her up.

All the way home I thought about Amy and our dynamic. I had told myself when she and I started that she would be enough...that I wouldn’t need anyone beyond her. But now that we’ve been living together for a while my urges to cause pain aren’t going away. I can’t turn it off as I thought I might be able to.

What I felt guilty for was for being wrong. I thought Amy would be enough and I thought I could push those urges away. Clearly, I was wrong. I should have known better.

And now, Bracken was going home with a torn up back because I was so obsessed with watching a scene involving the man I’d do almost anything to hurt.

I walked into the house shortly after 10:30 p.m. Amy was sitting up in bed and closed the book in her lap when she saw me. She looked so good. As I stood in the doorway to the bedroom gazing at her, I was reminded of the reason that I’ve tried pushing certain needs and desires away.

I loved her.

But I was conflicted.

I wanted her to be enough, and I even said she’d be enough. But she’s not.

“How was the study group?” she asked as I pulled off my shirt and headed to the bathroom.

“It was okay. It wasn’t nearly as beneficial as I had hoped it would be,” I called out from inside the bathroom over the sound of running water.

“I’m sorry it wasn’t more helpful, J.P.”

After I took a shower, I joined Amy in bed. She had a playful look in her eyes, but I was mentally tapped out right now.

“Princess, we’ll play dirty tomorrow. I’m very tired tonight.”

“It’s ok, we can play tomorrow,” she calmly agreed as she kissed me before scooting down in the bed.

I shut the lights off and was happy to be putting this evening behind me.

Over the thunderstorm that raged outside, an incessant knock forced me to a full alert state, and I sat up in bed. As I got out of bed, I found the spot next to me vacant. I made my way toward the knocking noise, wondering who it might be. I didn’t really have friends, and given the time of night, it was likely that I wouldn’t want to see whoever was on the other side of the door. I swung it open and saw someone that I thought I’d never see on my doorstep…Anthony Graves.

He was soaking wet as he stood there with his hands balled up into fists. His forehead was wrinkled and his eyebrows furrowed. The drenched shirt that clung to his body glimmered when it caught the light as his chest heaved.

I’ve studied him since he was a young man when he joined Irons and while I couldn’t say that I knew him well, I knew him better than he thought I did. And right now, he was on fire.

“Graves, what are you doing here?” I asked.

He looked away and then down at the ground. With his head bowed, more water droplets rushed off his forehead and hair. When he raised his head again, the light from inside the house lit his face up, and I could see the redness in his eyes.

“Graves?”

“You said you could make the pain go away.”

Holy fucking shit…he came around. I took a deep breath and stood up straighter.

“That’s right. I told you that, and I meant it.”

I saw the struggle he was having with himself.

“Blake told me not to seek this. He said it would make it worse…but I can’t stand feeling like this anymore.”

I honestly felt sorry for the guy. He’s been in so much agony over the loss of his father. He tries to hide the pain, but he’s not fooling me. Maybe he fools Blake, but not me. We’re a lot alike. I know he spent time going back and forth to San Francisco for beating sessions. And I won’t lie, I was pissed off about it. I had offered to help him, but he wouldn’t let me.

Yet, here he is. Finally. I opened the door wider and stepped back, inviting him in.

“I know you didn’t recover yet from the loss of your dad.” He walked into my home, and I felt a surge of energy as he passed by me. I shut the door and leaned on it as I gazed at him. He was vulnerable and emotionally needy; which is exactly how I wanted him. “I imagine it’s difficult to go from being a spoiled prince and coddled like a little rich fuck to realizing that the world doesn’t revolve around you.”

I took a few slow steps toward him as I pushed my way into his head. He stood there as still as a stone statue watching me with his stormy gray eyes.

“Take the soaking wet shirt off, Graves,” I instructed.

Watching him continue to struggle as he forced himself to comply excited me. The conflict that must be running through his veins is unlike any other. It’s a struggle he’s experienced before I bet. With the wet shirt in his hands and his chiseled wet torso in front of me, I took two more steps toward him.

His chest didn’t hide the fact that he was breathing hard, though I knew it wasn’t from arousal. He was showing off his control because I knew that this rich little fuck would love to take a swing at me. His self-control was admirable.

My clenched fist made a slapping noise as I pushed it against his chest, and placed my other hand behind his neck.

“I will take the pain in your chest away,” I said as I pressed harder against his chest. “But I’ll use physical pain to do it.” I removed my hand from his neck and clasped his side right over that scar he’s had since I met him. “You just have to trust me that everything I do will be in your best interest. Can you do that?” I asked.

His chest was really heaving now, and I knew it was because of the fucking scar. No one is supposed to touch it, according to him. But he’s desperate right now. He needs relief…and I’m going to give it to him.

I led him down my hallway to a spare bedroom where I kept my equipment. In my haste to get my chains, I banged into one of the drawers, and suddenly things started looking fuzzy. I kept trying to focus, but it was getting worse.

Visual clarity came rushing back as the throbbing in my hand became more apparent. I could see the alarm clock on the nightstand perfectly; 2:37 a.m. I pulled my hand out from under the pillow and pieced everything together. It was a dream. I had propelled myself out of what could have been the most incredible dream when I banged my hand against the headboard.