Scott hadn’t intended to sulk over Charlie leaving, but that was what he was doing. Sitting on the couch, staring down at his phone, covered in dogs.
He didn’t want Charlie to leave, but he couldn’t ask him to give up a huge opportunity just to be with him. Scott knew he wasn’t worth that.
So he knew Charlie would leave. That was the smart thing for him to do, and Scott didn’t want him to have regrets later. He didn’t want Charlie to wake up in six months and resent him over what he’d given up.
That seemed like the worst thing that could happen. This way, they were parting on good terms, wondering what might have been, but not giving themselves time to hate each other.
Not that Scott could imagine himself ever hating Charlie.
Maybe the right thing was to head over to Charlie’s house before he left, give him the key, and promise that he was always welcome, no matter what he decided. It’d be hard, and Charlie would probably get sick of having a boyfriend he couldn’t see all the time after a while, but at least that wasn’t admitting defeat.
The more Scott thought about it, the better a plan it seemed.
Maybe it’d take some of the crushing guilt coiled in the pit of his stomach away.
He wriggled his way out from under the pile of dogs, patting down his pockets to make sure the key was still in there.
Charlie needed to know how he felt. Before he went for his interview.
Well, maybe not the whole of how he felt. That was terrifying. But Charlie needed to know that he was wanted.
Scott opened the door to see Charlie poised to knock on it on the other side. He blinked for a few seconds, not entirely sure he wasn’t seeing things, but then Charlie frowned at him and Scott knew for sure that he was really there.
“Hi,” Scott said. “I was just… coming to see you.”
“Beat you to it,” Charlie said. “Can I come in? It’s okay if you say no.”
Scott blinked at him again. “Of course you can come in.”
He stepped away from the door, giving Charlie space to get past. He was dressed in the same coat he’d been wearing the first time Scott had kissed him.
Or, well...
The second time, but he still thought Charlie had moved first the first time, so it didn’t count.
The only thing Scott could really think about was how much he wanted to kiss him again. How much he wished all of this was a bad dream, and Charlie was coming over for movies and snacks and cuddles.
Scott wanted that. There was nothing else in the world that he wanted more right now.
Charlie wandered into the kitchen, shrugging his coat off and folding it over the back of a chair. Scott followed, watching him, waiting for him to say whatever he’d come to say.
Scott assumed it was some variation of goodbye.
At least Charlie was coming to do it in person, and not calling him tomorrow from Denver to say he was staying there.
One by one, all four dogs wandered into the kitchen to greet him, and he bent down to pet all of them, eventually picking Chewie up and holding him carefully.
Charlie had a soft spot for Chewie, but then, it was hard not to. Puppies were sweet and uncomplicated.
Everything else… complicated was about the right word for it.
Charlie kissed the puppy’s head and then set him down gently, leaving him to run to Scott’s feet for another pat.
Not for the first time in his life, Scott kind of wished he was a dog, too. They had much easier lives, as long as they had a loving home.
Of course, his life would have been a lot easier with a loving home, too.
He wanted that with Charlie.
He wanted it so much that the thought of not having it made it hard to breathe.
“Scott…” Charlie finally stopped in the middle of the room, turning to look at him. “I don’t wanna leave,” he started.
Scott’s breath caught in his chest. Charlie didn’t want to leave?
“I started applying for jobs elsewhere a while back, before I met you, because I thought I could never find love here. But now I have you, and I love you, and I don’t wanna go.”
Scott swallowed. Dizziness hit him in the back of the head, making the room spin for a second. Charlie stayed in the center of it, the one still, solid thing in all of the universe.
The one thing Scott was really sure of.
“S-say that again?” he stammered, his heart pounding. “That last part.”
“I don’t wanna go?” Charlie raised an eyebrow, taking a half-step toward him. If Scott looked even half as dazed as he was right now, Charlie was probably worried about him.
“The other part,” Scott mumbled. Charlie not wanting to go sounded great, but the part before that was the one making Scott’s pulse pound, making his lungs tight.
It was overwhelming, but in the best possible way.
“I love you,” Charlie said, his voice soft, a tiny smile turning up his lips. “And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way. That’s what I came here to ask.”
“Is it, uh...” Scott swallowed, his throat dry and tight. Was this really happening?
It sure seemed like it.
“Is it okay if I do feel the same way?” he asked, every word a struggle.
He’d never said anything like that before. He’d never felt anything like this before.
Charlie was it. Charlie was what he’d been looking for all this time.
And it was surprising and unexpected and not at all what Scott had pictured, but Charlie was still perfect. Still everything he wanted, now that he was sure what that was.
Scott didn’t have time to see the look on Charlie’s face before Charlie had closed the space between them, wrapping his arms tightly around Scott’s shoulders. He burst into tears before Scott could react, the sound snapping him out of his daze.
He wrapped his arms around Charlie as well, holding him tight, promising himself he’d never let go. Not for anything.
Whatever happened, he’d fight to keep Charlie.
“Thank you,” Charlie whispered beside Scott’s ear, his whole body heaving as he took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
A few stray tears welled up in Scott’s eyes, too. The relief of knowing that Charlie wanted him, wanted this to work out enough to stay, that was huge. He was allowed to cry over that.
Charlie would have told him he was allowed to cry over whatever he wanted.
That was what made Charlie so special. He’d given Scott permission to be himself.
And when he was being himself? He loved Charlie. Completely and wholeheartedly.
After what felt like both an eternity and not nearly long enough, Charlie pulled back a little. Just far enough to wipe a tear away from Scott’s cheek with the pad of his thumb, just far enough for Scott to see him smile.
Scott wanted to see Charlie smile every day for the rest of his life. He couldn’t imagine ever not wanting that.
“Thank you,” Scott said. “For being braver than I am.”
“Anytime.” Charlie put both of his hands on Scott’s face, leaning in and closing his eyes. Scott let his own eyes fall closed, focusing on the press of Charlie’s lips against his when they finally joined, gasping as Charlie’s tongue darted out.
The moaned softly, the sound one part arousal, one part relief. His hands moved to Charlie’s hips, holding him in place while they kissed, even with Charlie’s glasses in the way.
Scott was developing a kink for having his face poked by the frames while he was being kissed.
Charlie hummed against his mouth, the heat of the kiss building, the warmth between their bodies making Scott’s skin tingle. The slide of Charlie’s lips against his, full of unspoken promises, making his cock twitch.
He wanted Charlie. No, he needed Charlie, right now. He needed to feel as close as possible.
“Bed?” he asked between kisses, hopeful.
Charlie swallowed, and then nodded. “Bed.”