Five

Destiny closed her eyes, sinking beneath the surface of the water once more. The sun wasn’t quite gone yet, but this far into the forest, it might as well be night. She’d spent most of her free time at the creek ever since she’d promised to seek out Diz’s mate. The faster they learned who she was, the better.

Well, better was a relative term.

Things would be better in that she could quit wondering when the female was going to come and take him away.

Better like that. But seeing his mate wasn’t really going to fix anything for Destiny.

But… so what? There were worse things than being lonely. She could be completely on her own, without a pack at all. Or she could be like so many of her former clan. Dead.

Her memories were gruesome. The bear shifters of Colorado were highly feared. Especially among the small animal clans like the bobcats and foxes. The bears’ bully mentality caused a lot of problems for the more peaceable clans. If you had something they wanted, they took it without asking and with no repercussions. By blood.

She broke the surface for air, a snarl ripping from her throat.

This was useless. She’d seen nothing but nothing. The actual black water instead of the future. And no damn fortune cookie wisdom either.

But doing this was a heck of a lot better than facing Diz right now.

She’d spent the last two days locking up her feelings for him and reminding herself how ridiculous they were. To fall for your best friend was the oldest torture in the book. How could she have let herself do it?

She took a deep breath and focused again, forcing the thoughts to the back of her mind. Thinking only of the water and Diz’s future, she spread her fingers until her palms pressed against the choppy surface.

Focus, focus. Who is she?

A splash to her right broke her concentration, and she looked up just in time to see another tiny pebble land on her left.

“Hey, Dessy.” Diz grinned at her from one side of his mouth.

He stood on the boulder above her, shuffling a handful of pebbles at his hip. He wore those jeans that made her feel a little hotter in his pressence. The dark ones with holes in the thighs. A tight black t-shirt that hugged his muscled shoulders. And his work boots that made him look like a piece of hardworking man-candy.

“You broke my focus,” she complained, scowling.

He raised an eyebrow and tossed in another pebble, this one closer to hitting her.

She sighed, not wanting to play this time. “What do you want, Diz?”

He stared at her, eyes narrowed, but he didn’t answer.

She lowered herself under the water again just to avoid looking at him. When her oxygen had depleted, she came back up to find him exactly as she’d left him.

“Movie night. Your place,” he suggested.

No. Not that.

Not now. She’d have to sit there with him, smelling his spicy woodsy scent that reminded her of her mountain home, and remembering what it felt like to have her lips against his.

“Not tonight,” she murmured.

He froze like her answer surprised him. “No movie night? We can watch that funny one you’ve been wanting to see.”

She shook her head, running through excuses. “I have an early morning, and I’m tired. Still need to eat dinner, and… you know, this.” She gestured to the water.

He stared down at the rocks in his hands, a deep frown creasing his face. “This, huh. I guess your vision isn’t cooperating?”

She shrugged. “When does it ever?”

“Maybe you need a break. Relaxation. Like, say… popcorn, a movie, and cuddling.”

As frustrated as she was, how could she keep from smiling when the word ‘cuddling’ came out of his mouth? It sounded so normal. It was something they did weekly, their movie nights, and innocent cuddling was always part of that ritual. But now it wouldn’t be so innocent. Not on her end anyway. It didn’t seem right for her to pretend it was platonic.

She swam closer to the bank. “What I need is a good night’s sleep. Go home, Diz. Maybe I’ll have news for you in the morning.”

Give him hope, and he’d trot off happily to spend the night daydreaming about the future instead of making her drool after him. That was how she thought it’d go. But when she looked back at him, he seemed angry.

“News for me?” he spat. “You think that’s what I came here for? To see if you had a name yet?”

Well, not exactly. She figured he was curious, but she knew he’d come to check on her like he would any other day. Or just to say hi. Or for some company. But she’d hoped to make him leave. She just needed distance until she could see his mate. She knew it would help convince her heart to behave. Just until then, after that they could go on being friends like they’d always been. Or at least some version of what they’d been.

“Fuck this,” he muttered, throwing the pebbles to the ground with a clatter. “We’re not talking like this with you way the fuck down there.” Then he reached for the hem of his shirt, yanking it over his head before she could even gasp.

“What are you doing?”

“Going swimming. What’s it look like?” He fumbled with his belt before pushing his pants down. He had nothing on underneath.

Destiny turned her face away.

He jumped from the ledge into the water with a splash that sent waves lapping at her shoulders. Surfacing, he shook the water from his face and ran one hand through his short curly hair before his gaze zeroed in on her.

“What the hell is your problem?”

She shook her head. “No problem.”

“Bullshit. I haven’t seen you for two days, and now you want to skip movie night.”

She rolled her eyes to cover her nerves. “There’s no law that says we have to do movie night. Or see each other every day. Besides… we should get used to it, spending less time together.”

His jaw set in a tight angle as he stared at her so hard, she wanted to duck under the water again. He moved closer, gliding through the creek an inch at a time.

When he was close enough to peer into her eyes, he said, “I don’t want less time together. I’ll never want that.”

She gave him a small smile that she hoped came off as light instead of sad. “You will though. We both will. We’re going to find your mate, Diz, can you believe it? Things are going to be so much better for you.”  She punched his arm in a buddy-like gesture, hoping again to move them into less uncomfortable territory.

But he just scowled. “Why do you keep bringing that up? I told you I’m not here for that.”

She opened her mouth to try again, but nothing came out.

“Is this… is this because of what happened the other day? I told you, it was just my wolf. It didn’t mean anyth—”

“No.” She squeezed her eyes closed, not wanting to relive that humiliating and beautiful moment. Not wanting to hear those painful words again. “No, I know. It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”

Opening her eyes, she braced herself for more frustration, but his gaze had softened.

“I fucked up when I kissed you and I’m sorry, okay. It won’t happen again. I can control my animal, and I will. I can’t stand the idea of you being this uncomfortable around me, Dessy. I don’t like it at all.”

Her heart throbbed in her chest. It wasn’t because of the damn kiss. It was because he’d kissed her while needing his mate. Because she was just a substitute. And because there were feelings he didn’t know about and that she could barely conceal anymore. Feelings that she just wanted to wish away.

Finding his mate had become extremely necessary if they were ever to remain friends. But how could she tell him that without revealing herself.

He reached forward, grabbing her hand. “We don’t do this,” he whispered. “We don’t avoid each other.”

She let him pull her close until he placed her hand on his bare chest, his long fingers filling the gaps between hers. His other hand landed gently on her hip under the water and she was painfully aware of their nakedness.

“You’re right,” she said quickly, struggling not to shudder at his soft touches.

God, he was so beautiful. His skin. His dark eyes. The way he looked at her like she was of such great value to him.

His brow eased a bit. “You’re shaking.” His voice hovered just below a murmur as his hand swept a path from her hip, up to her ribs. “Are you cold?”

Hot, cold. She wasn’t sure. Both? Neither?

Her head was spinning at his nearness. Desire burned in her belly, aching and pooling between her legs. She was grateful there was water to mask her arousal, otherwise he’d know. He would scent what she’d so carefully hidden until now.

She nodded. “The water’s losing its warmth I suppose.” Somehow she managed a rational sentence.

“Come here,” he said, wrapping his arms completely around her to infuse her with his warmth. They were still well under the water, but the creek did nothing to keep their naked bodies from rubbing against each other.

Destiny gripped his shoulder willing her body to stop reacting to his, but it was useless. She shivered violently in his embrace while she clung to him like he was her source of oxygen.

Slowly, he bent his head to the curve of her shoulder to add his breath to help warm her. Except instead of exhaling, he breathed in. A deep drag that filled his lungs until his chest expanded fully, pressing against her breasts and rubbing her tightened nipples.

Crap. No, no, no. This was bad.

For whatever reason, Diz was imprinting her scent. His wolf would smell her need regardless of the water surrounding them. There would be no hiding it.

She stiffened, pulling back, but his arms tightened, locking her in place. She stayed completely still as he drew in another careful breath. But even the way he scented her, with his lips so close to her neck turned her on. There was no stopping this train wreck.

Her breaths came in ragged pants, part devastation, part arousal, as she waited for him to finish.

“Destiny.” His tone was a low, warning rumble she’d never heard from him before. Gritty and acid washed. 

It drew a sob from her throat. Because that wasn’t the voice of Diz, her friend. It was something different, and it meant they could never go back. Like when Adam and Eve ate from the Tree of Knowledge. You can’t unknow what you know.

He knew she desired him. It meant she’d lose him.

She pushed against his chest. She had to get out of there. “Let go.”

“Never. Not until you tell me why you smell like… like...” A sultry growl rumbled from his throat.

“I said, let go.” She shoved hard, and broke free, heading to the bank as fast as she could through the chest-deep water.

“Destiny,” Diz called, but she was already climbing out. “Des—”

She stood on damp grass, ready to shift to her cat, but the sound of splashing stopped her.  Turning to look, she saw him moving to catch up to her. “Don’t. Stay there.”

He stopped, but found her eyes, locking on with his hot gaze. “You’re… I smell you.”

He cocked his head to one side, dancing his eyes over her body from head to toe making her shiver.

She had no excuse. No reason that could explain her arousal. Nothing to shield her most private feelings from him.

In a matter of days he’d gone from the person she could confide in, to someone she wanted to hide from. It wasn’t fair. She finally had someone who understood her, who she could laugh with, even cry with. But now…

All she could do was run.

She shifted with his eyes still on her, and ran through the forest toward home.