“I didn’t think you were serious, Reena,” I call out to my friend from my perch in the waiting area of the dressing rooms at Henri Bendel’s.

“Why not? I’m serious. I want to be ready when I meet my future husband,” she says, her voice straining and muffled.

“What are you trying on now?” I call out. I’m ready to go.

“You’re always ready to go. I’ve never met a girl who hated shopping as much as you do,” she says with disgust.

“It’s a waste of time. Thank God I brought this book.” I reach into my purse and pull out my kindle and open it.

“Ah, you and your love stories. Just make sure you highlight and send me all of the sex scenes. They’re my favorite part.”

I roll my eyes and don’t answer.

“Apollo? Is that you?”

I close my eyes briefly before I look up. I would recognize that voice anywhere. I’m only surprised I didn’t smell the fire and brimstone when she entered the store.

“Hello, Nanette,” I say with a tight smile on my face.

“Well, you always did have your nose in a book. Good to see some things never change,” she says, looking down her nose at me. I give her a once-over. If I’m being objective, she looks great. But that disdain and calculation that was always in her eyes is still there now.

“Nice to see you,” I say and then pick up my kindle again. What the hell is taking Reena so long?

“You too. We should have dinner. Graham’s living here now, so maybe you can join us and make it a threesome. You seemed to enjoy being a third wheel.”

My kindle nearly falls out of my hand, and I can’t disguise my shock at her words.

“Oh, didn’t you know he was in town?” she laughs, icily.

“Of course, I did. I just don’t understand how you do?” I say acerbically.

“You’re so naïve, Apollo. What? Did you think you were finally going to get to live out your schoolgirl crush with Graham?”

Just then, Reena’s door swings open and she walks out. Her expression is comical. She can’t glower to save her life, but she’s trying her darnedest now.

“Why are you talking about Apollo’s boyfriend like you know him?” She demands as she storms up to where we’re talking.

“Reena, it’s okay.” I pick up my purse and stand up.

“Your boyfriend?” Nanette bursts out laughing, and my heart feels like it’s pressing against my lungs, trying to hide from what’s coming.

“How do you feel about your boyfriend paying for this new purse I just bought?” she holds up a Louis Vuitton purse and waves it in my face.

“You’re lying,” I say and hate how scared I sound.

“Of course, she’s lying,” Reena chimes in and then leans over my shoulder toward Nanette.

“If I wasn’t worried about getting your makeup all over my hands, I’d slap you,” she says, glaring at Nanette.

“Do you have something in your eye?” Nanette says as she looks at Reena like she’s an insect.

“No, but I’ll put something in yours if you don’t shut your piehole.” She turns and hooks her arm through mine.

“Come on, Apollo. It smells like unwashed, dirty vagina here now.” And then she drags me away.

I look over my shoulder and Nanette is glowering at us.

“Why did you look back? You never look back,” Reena hisses at me as she pulls me through the swanky department store.

“Sorry, I know. I just don’t understand what the fuck she’s doing here.”

“Is that her? The one you told me about? The old crone?” she asks as soon as we step out onto Fifth Avenue.

“Yeah.” I steer us toward East Fifty-Sixth.

“Apollo, I hate to break it to you, but she’s not really a crone. In fact, she’s quite pretty if you like blondes with great skin, incredible tits, and legs that never end.”

“Jeez, thanks. Wanna go back and ask her out?” I slip my arm out of hers.

“I kid, I kid. She’s got bunions. Let’s go eat mozzarella and all the cured meat we can fit on a plate.”

“Sure,” I smile distractedly. By the time we’re seated, my heart and mind are both racing, trying to understand what just happened.

“Don’t tell me you believe those lies, Apollo,” Reena asks as our waitress walks away from the table. I haven’t said a word since we sat down. I’m racking my brain and trying to decide what to do. I grab one of the small half-moon crostini and pile it high with salami and a slice of the most delicious smoked mozzarella in the world and shove it into my mouth without answering.

She does her weird glaring thing and in classic Reena fashion, she decides, if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em, and she shoves her own overloaded crostini into her mouth.

I’m panicking. Graham can’t be doing all of this and still seeing that woman. He wouldn’t. But why is she here? Why hasn’t he mentioned it? Why is Graham paying for her clothes?

“Apollo. Just ask him. Don’t sit here and make up fantasies about what the truth is. You can ask him face-to-face.”

“There’s an event tomorrow,” I say.

“What event?”

“He’s got some big endorsement deal. They’re having some sort of drinks thing.”

“And you didn’t invite me?”

“You’re invited. Sorry, he invited me this morning. I meant to tell you, and then I forgot,” I say and cram more cheese in my mouth.

“Well, it will be the perfect opportunity ask him face-to-face,” she says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

I take a huge gulp from the glass of red wine in front of me. “No, I don’t want to ask him face-to-face. I don’t want to do it in public. I’ll cry.” My lip trembles just thinking about the conversation. “I would rather not have my heartbreak publicized or captured on video by one of his crazy fans and posted on Instagram.” I take a huge bite of the fennel and salmon salad.

“Why do you assume that it’ll be heartbreak?

“Because, it always is,” I snap. “At least where Graham is involved,” I add piteously.

She narrows her eyes at me. “If you’d let him fuck you, you’d know …”

I wave a dismissive hand.

“It’s true. If you were letting him get in there, you’d never believe anything but how crazy he is about. I mean, even without giving it up, his wooing is like on fleek.”

“Since when do you say on fleek?” I take another gulp of my wine.

“Since Graham Davis decided to teach a master class on how to make a girl fall in love with him.” She cups her chin in her hand and stares off dreamily.

“Cut it out.” I shove her back, and she just bats her eyelashes. “I’ve told you. I’m scared. The last two weeks have been crazy. When we’re alone, it’s wonderful. It’s just like old times. We laugh and talk. We’ve even been reading together again. But the minute we step outside and someone recognizes him, it’s like a bucket of cold water to the face.”

“He’s famous, what can he do? Wear a mask?” she asks through a mouth full of olives.

“No, I mean, I know it’s not anything he can help. And it’s actually not that bad. Just a few people ask for selfies. But since someone posted that picture of us at the Strand Bookstore, people have been camped out there every day. One of my favorite places and it’s ruined,” I pout.

“You are so dramatic.” She nudges me with her foot.

“I think I have the right to be. But I mean, he’s talking about becoming a teacher and just being a normal human being. But at the same time, he’s signing this huge deal right now to be the face of some line of athletic water. It’s huge.”

“So, I’m still waiting to hear the downside. One of the hottest, richest men on the planet is wooing you like crazy. Your apartment looks like a fucking flower shop.”

“Yeah … he’s been so amazing,” I admit, and can’t help but smile. I’ve woken up to a flower delivery every single morning. He brings lunch to the gallery every day and is outside waiting to walk me home when I’m leaving. We walked about two blocks the first time before I got tired of people stopping and staring or waving awkwardly at Graham and ordered us an Uber.

“So, what’s the problem? I know it’s not Lucas. I saw a blonde head disappearing into his place last week …”

“Ugh. He’s a pain in the ass. I wish I hadn’t agreed to this charade. Of course, he has no clue that Graham and I are more than friends, and he’s been badgering me to invite him to dinner, so he can try and sign him as a client.” I moan.

“He’s the worst. You should just tell him about you and Graham.”

“I don’t want to. I don’t know if there’s going to be a Graham and me.” I confess the fear that’s been niggling at me.

“Why not? He’s crazy about you,” she says.

“For now. I can’t compete with the life he’s used to. What if he gets bored?”

“Apollo. You said he told you he’s been in love with you since he was fourteen. I mean, is fourteen years not enough to know whether or not he’s got staying power?” she asks exasperation edging her voice.

“Well, being in love with me didn’t stop him from breaking my heart … I don’t understand. But I mean, I guess guys need to do that. Sow their wild oats and all …” I frown miserably and rest my chin in my hands. “This is all in the past. I want to leave it there, I don’t believe he’s being dishonest. I would know …” I trail off because there’s something I can’t put my finger on. A memory that’s niggling in the corner of my mind.

“Exactly.” She nods and grins. “See? You already know.”

“Yeah, but—”

“Apollo. Stop making excuses.” Her voice has a sharpness that is rarely present. “You’re scared. I get it. But love is scary. You were with Lucas for four years. I never once heard you complain when he started pulling away from you. Hell, you didn’t even bat an eye when I told you he’s got some random pussy coming in and out of his place.”

“It’s been over for a long time,” I say sullenly.

“Did it ever really start to begin with? I get it, he’s safe. But Apollo, who wants safe when you can have the thrill of loving someone so much it aches when you’re not together?”

“I don’t want to ache,” I moan.

“Then give Graham to me,” she deadpans. My stomach lurches at the idea.

“You should see your face.” She claps and cackles. “I love Jason, but shit, I’d drop him like a hot potato if Graham Davis was professing his love to me.”

“Don’t talk about him like he’s an object. He’s a person. I know he loves me. I know he cares. But what if the draw of that life is too hard for him to resist? I mean, why is Nanette here?” I throw my hands up in exasperation.

“Listen, I can’t convince you of anything you don’t want to believe. You can decide that you don’t want to give him the chance to break your heart and go on with your life. But, that won’t stop you from loving him. It will only deprive you of having all of the delicious sweet that he’ll give you along with the inevitable hurt.”

“Why does it have to be inevitable?” I ask miserably.

“Darling, you of all people … should know this,” she says gently, squeezing me to soften the blow of her words.

“I do.” I think of Artemis and my father dying. Of my mother’s retreat. I know all too well.

“But would you trade a minute of the time you had with them if it meant you could spend the rest of your life without the pain of missing them?”

I gaze at Reena’s face and marvel how this woman who pushed her way into my life has become such an essential part of it. She’s been more than a friend. She’s been my sister, my mother, my confessor.

“I love you,” I tell her.

“Me, too. But if you ruin the best chance I’ll ever have of meeting Omar Solomon, I’m going to fucking disown you.”

“I wouldn’t think of it,” I tell her. “Good girl. Now, let’s get back to shopping. That crone killed my vibe. I need to make sure I’m dressed to kill tomorrow.”