Chapter Twenty-two

 

 

 

 

“Bitch, look at me,” growled Breaker.

“No,” I cried, trying to get away from him. Wasn’t he dead? “Leave me alone!”

“Jessica. Wake up. You’re okay. It’s just a dream.”

“Stop!” I gasped, feeling his hands on my arms. He’d been chasing me through a cemetery, where all of the victims of the Devil’s Rangers had been buried, including Raptor’s mother. There was also a tombstone with my name on it and he was trying to drag me back over to the hole, so that he could push me into it.

“It’s me. Jordan. You’re okay. Wake up.”

Jordan?

I opened my eyes, fragments of the nightmare still haunting me. “Sorry,” I said, staring up at Jordan, who was sitting next to me on the bed.

“You had me worried there,” he said, smiling grimly. “You were screaming and I thought someone had broken in here.”

Embarrassed, I looked away. “I’m sorry. I should have told you that I sometimes talk in my sleep.”

“That was a little more than talking,” he said, smoothing the hair away from my face. “You okay, now?”

I thought back to the times when I’d woken up in the middle of the night, my mother standing over me with tears in her eyes. I didn’t want her or anyone else worrying about me. “I’m fine.”

“Let me guess, you were dreaming about one of those assholes, Breaker or Reaper?”

I smiled sheepishly. “Breaker. I’m sorry if I woke you.”

“There is absolutely nothing to be sorry about, Jessica.”

I turned and stared at the foot of the bed, remembering Breaker’s eyes. They’d been so cold. So hateful. “I haven’t had a nightmare of him in such a long time. I guess I thought I was over them.”

“It’s probably because of all the stuff going on in your life at the moment.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you’re right.” I sighed. “Even dead that prick still has power over me.”

“He has no power over you,” said Jordan sternly. “Don’t ever think that.”

“He apparently still has power over my dreams,” I countered. “Because I certainly can’t stop them from happening.”

“Nobody can. Look, it’s just your subconscious at work. The nightmares will eventually pass.”

“Yes… I know you’re right. I just hate that they can be triggered so easily.”

“It was violence that created them and violence that brought them back. We just have to make sure that it stays out of your life, from here on out.”

“Moving away from Jensen has got to help,” I answered, thinking of Cheryl’s house in Shoreview, again. “I hope. At least after this crap with Kodiak is sorted out.”

“It’s a good start.” He stood up. “And believe me, it will get sorted. One way or another.”

“What about you?”

He tilted his head to the side. “What about me?”

“You must have nightmares, doing what you do.”

“Yes,” he admitted.

“How do you usually get through them?”

He shrugged. “Like I said before, you can’t control your dreams. I guess I’ve just learned to accept them.”

I grinned. “So, you basically roll with the flow.”

“I guess you could say that.” He grinned back. “Just be lucky that you don’t sleepwalk.”

My eyes widened. “You sleepwalk?”

“It’s been awhile. Mostly when I was a kid.”

“When was the last time it happened?”

“It’s been a few months. I woke up in the kitchen one night, after walking into a wall.”

I laughed. “Wow. Did you ever wake up outside?”

“A couple of times, back when I was just a kid. But then the Old Man started locking me in my bedroom at night.” His smile fell. “Took care of the problem.”

My heart went out to him. I couldn’t imagine living with someone so cruel. “Maybe you were trying to get away from him? In your dreams?”

He didn’t reply, but I could tell from the look in his eyes, I was probably right.

“Sorry,” I said, feeling foolish for bringing up his past again. “Me and my big mouth.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

I decided to change the subject quickly. “So, what time is it?”

“About nine in the morning. You should try and get back to sleep, though. It’s only been a couple of hours.”

“Go back to sleep?” I replied dryly, pulling the sheet up to my neck. “Right.”

“You worried about having another nightmare?”

“To be perfectly honest, it’s not just that. I keep thinking that Reaper is going to bust through the window any minute,” I replied, nodding toward the wall.

“Believe me, Reaper doesn’t know where you are and if he did, he wouldn’t be alive long enough to be any kind of threat.”

“The last time someone reassured me that I was safe, Reaper’s club kidnapped me, not less than thirty minutes later. So, you can understand why I’m not feeling very confident about anything right now.”

“Do you want me to stay in here with you?”

“No,” I replied, a little surprised that he’d volunteered. “You don’t have to.”

“It’s okay. I don’t mind at all.”

I bit my lower lip. “I don’t want to be a pain in the ass.”

“Don’t worry about it. The truth is, if you can’t sleep, I can’t either, knowing that you’re frightened.”

“Okay, if you’re sure it’s not too much of a bother? I mean… I guess I would feel more comfortable if I wasn’t alone.”

“Not at all. I’ll go grab a sleeping bag.”

Staring down at the hardwood floor, I could imagine how uncomfortable it would be. Making up my mind, I moved over on the bed. “Why don’t you just sleep in the bed with me?”

The surprised look on his face was almost comical. “You’re not serious?”

“Sure, why not? We can put a pillow between us, if it makes you more comfortable.”

“A pillow?”

“Yeah, and don’t worry, I’ll keep my hands to myself,” I teased.

He stared at me with amusement. “Tell you what, why don’t we go to my room? I have a king-sized bed. There will be more space between us. Less chance of you taking advantage of me.”

I laughed. “Sure.”

“Okay, then. I guess I’ll meet you there,” he said, still looking bewildered as he headed toward the doorway.

Grabbing my pillow, I followed him down the hallway, to his bedroom. When I walked in and saw the bed, I had to admit, I was glad he’d suggested it. The mattress was a luxurious pillow-top.

He got in first and moved over to the other side. “Come on in. The water’s warm,” he said, yawning.

I bit my lower lip, wondering all of a sudden what I’d been thinking. “It is, huh?”

He winked. “Don’t worry. I’ll stay in the deep-end.”

Seeing a man like that waiting for me under the sheets, half-naked and hot as hell, caused so many emotions, I wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Swallowing, I got in and pulled the covers around me.

“You okay?” he whispered, not one part of our bodies touching.

“Yes,” I whispered back.

As we lay there together, I suddenly felt anxious and began to babble, like an idiot. “So, nobody knows that you own this place?” I asked, cutting through the silence.

“Just you, now.”

“Someone could find records, though, right?”

“The person that is on the title of this property isn’t Jordan Steele. It’s actually Samuel Larson.”

My eyes widened. “Your nephew?”

“Yes. I want him to have it. He’s going to need a safe place to go, someday. Especially, if he follows in his old man’s footsteps.”

“You mean if he joins the club?”

“Oh, he will. Raptor loves the club and his boy will, too.”

“What are your views on that?”

“Joining a club?” He shrugged. “To each their own. Most members have grown up in that kind of lifestyle and would feel lost without it. If that’s what makes them happy, then so be it.”

“Your father was in a club, right?”

“Yes.”

“You never decided to join?”

“No.”

I waited for him to tell me more, but he remained silent.

“You don’t really like talking about yourself, do you?”

“Not much more to know about me. I’m a relatively simple man, other than what I do for a living.”

I laughed out loud. “Really? A simple man, huh? You don’t really expect me to believe that, do you?”

“Why not?”

I stared at him in disbelief. “You must think I’m gullible.”

“No, but you are a woman,” he said, a slow smile spreading across his face, “and like most, you tend to over-think things. Especially when it comes to men. Most of us are pretty straight-forward.”

“Right,” I said, smiling. Jordan Steele was obviously anything but. “You’re so full of it And a little chauvinistic, I might add.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but… you’re over-analyzing me again.”

I snorted. “Right.”

“Seriously, I’m just like most average guys that are happy with the basics.”

“And what is that?”

“Food on the table, a well-paying job, and sex.”

The fact that he’d brought up sex and we were laying together, in bed, made my stomach heat up. “Sorry, but, I can’t even believe you’re saying that with a straight face.”

His lip twitched. “You don’t believe me?”

“When it comes to you, I guess I really don’t know what to believe. But, something tells me that you’re holding back. That your needs are not really so… generic.”

He turned to his side and stared down at me. “Maybe, but the truth is, that’s all I can afford to need.”

“What about family or love? “

“There’s no room in my life for either,” he replied, now looking past me.

“Then maybe you should change your life.”

He sighed and lay back on his pillow. “It’s not that easy,” he said, closing his eyes. “Even if I could, I’ve made too many enemies. Their lives would always be in danger. I couldn’t do that to anyone I cared about.”

He was obviously right. There was no point in arguing it, so I said nothing.

Jordan yawned. “I’m exhausted. Good night.”

“Sweet dreams,” I said softly.

“You, too.”