Phoenix
Phoenix arrived at the Sherridan family home five minutes before their date. Then he spent the next four minutes sitting in his car, stroking Lucy, because he wasn’t sure if Ace would be upset if he came early. At the one minute mark, he turned the car off and walked up, pleased to see it was exactly five o’clock when he reached it.
He’d been to the Sherridan house once before, when his parents had brought food to Jack and Ace after Ace’s mom had died. It hadn’t changed in the nearly-fifteen years since. The wood exterior was the same olive green, and even the hedges looked the same, though they were slightly more unruly than they had been then. It was wedged between two other houses on the street, and fear prickled up Phoenix’s neck as he realized that there was a chance that someone could come out and see him.
Stepping up to the porch, he walked to the door and knocked quickly. Lucy stood at his side, her tail wagging slightly, as though she knew Ace was going to be there. Since she had a better nose than Phoenix, she probably did know.
The door opened a moment later, and Ace smiled. “Hey. Glad you could make it.”
He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to Phoenix’s cheek, and Phoenix returned the motion. Then Ace led him inside, and he felt some of the tension leave him. There was no one to see them now.
The house felt distinctly as though it hadn’t been updated in years. Wood paneling lined the walls of the living room, which was taken up mostly by overstuffed leather furniture and a hand-carved coffee table. The only things out of place were the many boxes piled up along the walls. Ace looked at them, and then back to Phoenix.
“I haven’t been able to bring myself to unpack yet,” he admitted.
There was a sorrow to his voice, and Phoenix forced himself to imagine moving back into his parents’ house after they died. He grimaced at the thought.
“Understandable, I think. You have to take time to mourn him.”
Ace shrugged. “It’s been six months. You’d think…”
“When my great-aunt died, I was bedridden for a week. I ordered out every meal and I missed the funeral because I couldn’t keep it together. We grieve on our own time. Everyone’s is different.”
The hug took him by surprise, but he slowly wrapped his arms around Ace, rubbing his back.
“Thank you,” Ace said. His lips were a little too close to his ear, and Phoenix shivered.
“Sorry. Reflex.”
“It’s okay. I didn’t mean to get emotional. It’s just… it hits me sometimes that I don’t have parents anymore. I’ll go to tell Dad something, or plan on introducing you to him, and I have to remember he isn’t there to tell.”
Phoenix blinked. “You would want to tell him about me?”
“Yes. I like you. A lot.” He seemed to start to say something else, but apparently thought better of it.
“I like you, too. But I don’t want you to meet my parents. Not because you’ve done anything,” he added quickly. “I don’t want to put you through that yet. You can meet my brother, though.”
A small smile formed on Ace’s lips. “I would like that.”
“Good.” Phoenix nodded, then pulled back out of Ace’s arms. It was starting to become a bit too enclosing.
“I haven’t made dinner yet, but I’ve got a few options. I thought I’d see what you’re feeling. You don’t like salmon, so I didn’t get any fish, just in case, but we have chicken, steak, and pork chops.”
Warmth spread through Phoenix’s chest as Ace spoke. He had remembered Phoenix’s disastrous dinner with his parents and was trying to keep the same thing from happening with them. Most people wouldn’t have even thought of that. Ace had, though, and that was touching.
“I would hate to waste steak,” he said hopefully. It was one of his favorite foods, as long as it was cooked properly.
Ace nodded. “Steak it is, then. We have all kinds of stuff to go with it. How are you on vegetables? I got brussels sprouts and broccoli”
“Both are fine, as long as they’re roasted.”
“Mashed potatoes?”
“Work perfectly. Especially if there’s cream cheese in them and you manage to beat all the lumps out of them.”
His mom always made hers with too many lumps, and he spent half the meal smashing them with his fork. It was probably too much to hope that Ace would get it right, but he’d done well so far. If it came to it, he could certainly mash the potatoes himself and save Ace the trouble. That might be the best solution, actually.
“I’ve never had them with cream cheese,” Ace said. “You’ll have to show me how to do it.”
Phoenix nodded. “I can do that.”
Taking his hand, Ace led him into the kitchen. Like the living room, it didn’t seem to have been updated, save for the newer appliances. More than likely, those had only been bought because the others had given out.
Ace walked over to the fridge and pulled out the steaks. “How do you like them cooked?”
“Medium rare. What do you put on them?”
“Just some steak blend I got at the grocery. It’s pretty good. Want to look at it?”
He didn’t want to be too demanding, but Ace had given him the option. He walked over and took the bottle that Ace had pulled out of the spice cabinet. There was nothing too spicy in it, aside from a dash of paprika, and it looked good enough. He nodded and handed it back to Ace.
“That’ll be fine. Do you want me to get started on the potatoes?”
“If you don’t mind. They’ll take the longest. And I picked up a loaf of Walker’s focaccia for us to have.”
Phoenix hummed in approval. There was no going wrong with Walker’s bread.
Short work was made of the potatoes, which Phoenix washed and peeled. It was soothing, doing something so methodical and repetitive, and by the time he was done, Ace had finished chopping up the brussels sprouts. The only slight issue came when Ace was trying to put the sprouts in the oven while Phoenix put the potatoes on the stove. But even that was solved in a matter of seconds, with Ace stepping out of the way until Phoenix was done. Afterwards, everything ran smoothly. Too smoothly. Phoenix couldn’t help but feel like something was about to go wrong, but it never did. It was as though the entire universe was working together to make sure things went well.
The thought was absurd. The universe didn’t care about individuals. It surrounded them, but there was no direct intervention on anyone’s lives. He was just thinking that way because everything was going well.
Lucy had made herself right at home, curled up in one corner of the kitchen. She was watching the two of them intently, or at least seemed to be every time Phoenix happened to look down. There was something oddly domestic about this moment that struck him. He’d never done this with anyone else; never wanted to do it with anyone else.
Two weeks ago, the thought of being in the kitchen with another person would have been absurd, but here he was. Ace seemed to understand him on a different level than most. He didn’t ask stupid questions. Didn’t expect things of Phoenix that he couldn’t do. His touches were soothing, rather than grating. And above all else, he was just… kind. Phoenix’s crush before had been superficial, for the most part. Sure, he’d seen the way Ace acted around his friends, but he hadn’t known him. Now there was more to it, it was starting to feel a lot more like love.
The thought pulled him up short. He’d never loved someone like this. Sure, he loved his family, but that wasn’t the same. Ace meant something special to him. But did he mean something special to Ace?
A sharp hiss drew him from his thoughts, and he looked down just in time to see boiling water cascade down the side of the pot. Without thinking, he grabbed the handles, only to pull away with a yelp as the tips of his fingers burned. The pot was still boiling over, but he couldn’t do anything about it. A desperate noise clawed its way up his throat. There were hands on his hips, and Ace pulled him out of the way, then grabbed the pot. His hands were stuffed in silicone mitts, so he wouldn’t get burned.
A moment later, Ace turned and pulled off his mitts. “Are you okay?” he asked gently.
Phoenix shook his head. His fingers were still burning, and his breathing was shallow. He’d ruined everything. Dinner was a disaster. He couldn’t even boil potatoes properly! Now, Ace was going to get frustrated and he would have every right to, because—
Ace gripped his shoulder with one hand and forced his chin up with the other. “Breathe,” he said firmly.
He demonstrated: breathing in, then holding it, then breathing out slowly through his mouth. After a few repetitions, Phoenix’s felt the tension easing out of his body.
“How did you know to do that?” he asked, when he could speak again.
“My sensei taught us breathing exercises, as well as movements. I’ve found it particularly useful for anxiety. Now let’s get you some ice.”
He grabbed a cold pack from his freezer and Phoenix took it. After the heat, the cold hurt just as much, but it quickly grew soothing.
“Sorry I ruined dinner,” he said quietly.
Ace frowned. “You didn’t ruin dinner. You didn’t even ruin the potatoes. We can get them back to cooking, and they’ll be done in no time. I’ll let you taste test to see if they’re smooth enough.”
Phoenix hesitated, then nodded. He still felt like he’d done something wrong, but if he said anything, Ace would just say he was fine.
Watching Ace cook was mesmerizing. The way he moved around the kitchen was almost like a dance—not unlike the way Phoenix’s mom had worked. Maybe this was just how ordinary people cooked. True to his word, Ace let him try the potatoes, and Phoenix made suggestions here and there until they were just right.
Once everything was ready, Ace made their plates and carried them to the table. A candle was lit in the center, but it was short enough that they wouldn’t have to look around it to talk to each other.
“Would you like some wine?” Ace asked. “I’ve got red or white, but for the steak, I’d say red. It’s a zinfandel.”
That meant nothing to Phoenix. He drank wine when other people had it, but had never gone out of his way to learn the different types.
“I’ll have a glass,” he said.
Ace filled two, setting one beside his own plate and handing the other to Phoenix. For the most part, the pain in his fingers had subsided, and by the time they finished dinner, it would be gone completely.
The steak was wonderful. Ace had managed to do a perfect medium rare. Most people cooked it rare or medium, without managing to get it right. He took a sip of the wine and let out a slow breath. It wasn’t bad, but it didn’t taste great. Normally, he stuck with sweeter drinks.
“How is everything?” Ace looked a bit nervous, which was oddly reassuring. At least Phoenix wasn’t the only one who questioned if he had done something right.
“Really good. The potatoes are perfect,” he said with a slight smile.
He’d already fed Lucy, and she knew better to beg. Instead, she sat in the corner, watching them, as though encouraging him to say something.
“I’ve missed you in the studio,” he said.
It had only been three days, but he’d gotten used to having Ace nearby.
“I’ve missed being there. You’ll have to show me what you’ve been working on the next time I’m over.”
The words brought a smile to Phoenix’s lips. There was going to be a next time. And a time after that, and a time after that. They had a future together. For the first time, Phoenix allowed himself to believe it.
“Okay,” he said with a nod. “I’ll look forward to it.”