RAMBLE
Trey
THE STOOL WOBBLES under my swaying. Blinking is a chore for my sticky eyelids. Fuck, I’m drunk. When did that happen? Everything in this place is blurry and distorted, including the two people watching me.
“What’s with the stare-down? Do I have something on my face?”
“Just waiting for what’ll come outta your mouth next,” Jack explains.
“Well, knock it off. Your leering is creeping me out.”
“You’re the one spitting truth bombs left and right,” Addy chimes in. “I like Raven and all, but there’s other subjects we can discuss. Oooh, like The Daze. The rooftop at Boomers is gonna be killer.”
My chest tightens in a vice. “I was gonna take Raven there.”
“Oh, Lord. Not again,” Addy mutters.
“Maybe we should go,” Jack suggests and pats my shoulder.
I don’t have the strength to shove him away. A breath sputters from my lips, each movement feeling like a struggle. “Why is it so bright in here?” My words slur together.
Addy huffs. “Probably has something to do with all those beers you’ve had.”
And I’m thirsty for more. “Can I have another?” I point to my empty bottle.
“No way, cowboy. You’ve had plenty,” she replies.
I squint, closing one eye to focus better. “Addy? Since when do you have a twin?”
“Ah, intoxicated Trey has jokes. He should come out more often.”
My tongue is heavy and feels swollen. I cough, trying to alleviate the dryness crawling up my throat. I shift to rest my elbow on the bar but miss, almost toppling over in the process.
“Jesus, kid. You’re a mess. Pull yourself together and have some water.” Jack pushes a full cup toward me.
I grip the cool glass and lift it to my lips. I’m sloppy while guzzling the liquid down, but there’s no one here to impress. The only one who matters is gone. With a forced exhale, I feel my posture deflate.
“Raven isn’t coming back,” I say quietly.
Jack hears me. “She will because Garden Grove is her home now. Stop obsessing.”
“You don’t understand,” I start, but he interrupts.
“The hell I don’t. And we’re not talking in circles again, all right? We already went over this.”
“But I want more with her, and she doesn’t know. How do I win her back?”
“Look,” Jack says and points to the television above the bar. “The game is on. It’s all tied up. Let’s see who wins.”
I’m not listening to him. “I need a grand gesture or something.” I snap my fingers. “I’ll buy her flowers and chocolate and . . . and . . . jewelry. Girls love that shit, right?” My bleary gaze lands on Addy until I get distracted by the empty space around us. “Where the hell did everyone go?”
“It’s Sunday night, Trey. They cleared out hours ago,” she responds. “You’ve been waxing poetic without a huge audience. Be happy no one else will know about this sensitive side unless you piss me off.”
“Well, fuck. I better watch my back. If Marlene catches wind, I’ll be ruined.”
Addy laughs. “You’re a dork. And for the record, your sweet words will be enough for her. That’s what she wants to hear. Don’t worry about the extra stuff.”
“But what if I don’t get a chance to tell her?”
“She’ll probably be back tomorrow.”
I perk up. “What? How do you know?”
Her eyes dance around, not settling on me. “Uh, I’ve gotta start cleaning up. You good here, Jack?”
He waves her off. “Yeah, yeah. Thanks for the help.”
Addy nods at us and scurries away. Her sudden departure seems odd but what the fuck do I care. I shake my head, liquor sloshing in my brain. “Damn, I’m drunk.”
“Yeah, we’ve established that.”
I turn to Jack. “You’re such a quitter, old man. I totally beat you.”
He peers down his nose at me. “Wanna repeat that?”
“Getting hammered was your grand plan but I’m the only one seeing double. You’ve only had a handful of drinks all day. What the fuck? Just admit it—I win.” I burp into my fist.
Jack slouches against the rail behind him. “Should I get you a trophy? Damn, you’re a riot. I’m being smart and responsible. You’ve got sorrows to drown. This,” he gestures between us, “is me along for the ride. I’m keeping your whiny ass outta trouble.”
“Remember Charlie Brown? You sound like his teacher right now. Wah, wah, wah. You can’t keep up, gramps. Plain and simple.”
“Whatever you say.”
“So, why are we still here?”
“Good question, kid.”
“What time is it?” I search my pockets. “Where’s my damn phone?”
“I took that stupid device away hours ago. All you wanna do is text Raven and bitch about her not answering. Then gush about how you care for her. It’s fucked up. Rinse, wash, repeat. Give it a rest,” Jack demands.
“But I’ve got things to tell her.”
“And all those jumbled thoughts can wait until you’re sober.”
“Raven needs to hear me so she’ll come back,” I insist. “If I stop trying, she’ll think it’s over.”
“Trey, it’s been one day. Chill out. You’ll get the point across,” Jack assures me. “No doubt about that, considering you’ve been yammering on all night.”
“I blame you for all this. You wanted to bond and shit.” My mouth is moving but I feel numb. “Did someone give me Novocain?”
Jack chuckles. “Nope. Just a bunch of booze. But hey, I’m glad you’re feeling relaxed.”
I take a deep breath, the scent of popcorn and beer thick in the air. Maybe that’s me. I sniff my shirt and almost gag. “I smell like garbage,” I complain and swallow the threat of vomiting.
“You are so damn random when you’re drinking. I can’t keep up with you.”
“Because you’re old.”
He punches my arm. “I don’t speak idiot.”
I almost tip off the stool, but catch myself at the last second. “Why am I such an asshole? I've done so much stupid shit, Jack. How the hell do I fix that?”
“Runs in the family,” he says. “I’ve already told you about my fuck ups. Your dad wasn’t innocent either. His surly attitude got him into all sorts of trouble with your mom.”
The buzzing in my mind screeches to a halt when he mentions my father. “Really? I don’t remember him that way.”
Jack scrubs a hand over his jaw. “Yeah, she whipped him into shape. I fucking idolized my older brother. He was a hellion, a lot like you. Didn’t give a crap about nothing but fast cars and partying hard. Your mom loved him, though. Saw past his foul language and nasty behavior, but he didn’t make it easy on her. Sound familiar?”
“Sure does. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” There’s a marching band playing a crescendo in my head as I wait for him to respond.
He shrugs and takes a sip of water. “We don’t talk much about this sort of thing, remember? Would you have been open to any of this if the liquor wasn’t flowing?”
“Nah, probably not. Glad we are, though.”
“Me too, kid. Didn’t bring it up to cause pain. Only wanna make a point,” he reiterates. “Your woman wants to know she matters. That she comes first. You don’t gotta plan something outrageous. You already told me Raven wants your heart, so give it to her. Don’t push her away.”
I lean against the bar. “That isn’t easy for me.”
He slaps my back. “You’re already taking the right steps, so don’t freak out. You’re not beyond repair. Think of this like the beginning of an engine overhaul.”
I groan. “That’s so much work.”
“It doesn’t have to be. One step at a time, kid. Don’t get ahead of yourself. We’ll talk more tomorrow when you’re in better shape. Who knows if you’ll even remember this in the morning,” Jack jokes.
“I’m wasted, not blacked out. I’ll recall all this just fine, fuck you very much. Gimme my phone back,” I say and hold out my palm.
Jack raises a dark brow. “Why?”
I roll my eyes. “None of your business.”
He grunts. “Never seen you this way, Trey. This girl is your real deal. I’m damn happy you found her.”
“She found me,” I correct. “And all I’ve done is treat her like a convenient hookup. Fuck,” I curse and grip my hair. “Raven deserves to be worshipped. I never should have assumed otherwise.”
Jack crosses his arms. “You’ll make all that nonsense up to her and correct the mistakes, but now isn’t the time. Try again when you wake up, after sleeping this shit off.”
“All right,” I grumble. Maybe he’s got a point. I can almost hear my bed calling. All the drinks and fried food are catching up to me. “Can I get a lift home?”
“Your chariot awaits outside,” he hoots.
I cover my ear. “Why are you so excited?”
“Because my babysitting shift is almost over. I can meet up with my honey after this,” he says with a wag of his brows.
“You’re such a dick.” I hiccup, feeling bile swirl in my gut.
Jack snorts. “Jealous?”
“Obviously!” I shout and a pang echoes in my ears. “I want to be with Raven. Why is she acting like I don’t exist?”
He pulls me off the seat and guides me to the door like a toddler. “Quit bitching. I’m sick of it. You’ll be good as gold tomorrow.”
I stumble over the floor mat but Jack catches me. Black dots speckle my vision as I say, “I’m not so sure about that.”