Chapter 24

Marc

I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the day interacting with the old ladies and their children. Although, as always, it hurts being around mothers with babies and young children knowing I’ll never have one of my own, somehow I haven’t felt lonely enough for that to prey on my mind. Amy’s kept me busy, and I’ve been included in all the conversation and gossip.

Having no family, I haven’t been forced into such close proximity with youngsters before today, and despite my personal circumstances, found I’ve actually loved being around the little ones. As long as I’ve kept my hurt and sadness locked tightly away, it’s true to say I’ve had, on many levels, a surprisingly good time.

Sandy had helped to put things into perspective. She and her old man, Viper, couldn’t have kids, so made the best of it, ending up delighted when Sam had turned up as Viper’s fully grown daughter he never knew he had. And now they’ve got a grandchild, little Eli. And, my, hasn’t Sam’s got her hands full with that kid? A couple of times today I’ve noticed he’s definitely Drummer’s son, if that can be measured by the way everyone jumps when he demands attention. And he’s only just over half a year old.

Now Olivia, she takes after Sophie, happy and content and seeming to get pleasure in making people smile and laugh.

And Amy. Well, I was taken by the sweet little girl when I first met her, wanting to make sure she stayed out of the clutches of her grandmother. Relieved when I knew how well Drummer and Sam were looking after her, but still wishing that Heart would end his travels and come back and be her dad. I’m over the moon and delighted to see them together, and no one could miss the love that he shows for his little girl.

She’s easy to love, even I’ve fallen for her. Helping her learn how to ride her bike without training wheels and swimming with her in the pool was fun, and I’m glad to be allowed, if only in a small way, to be part of her life.

Heart’s cuddling his daughter, but giving me an assessing look, his face blank so I can’t read what’s on his mind. Something seems to be different about him, making me speculate just how their conversation went in church. Or is it that he’s regretting what we did last night? Mingling with the women and children had made me forget the problems at my door for a while, but the good mood brought on by my unusually relaxing day starts to dissipate.

The easy relationship we’d developed is still strained when we join the others for the buffet-style dinner I’d help to prepare, and then Heart moves away and seems to be in deep conversation with Sam. Their gesticulations make me think they’re formulating some sort of arrangement about his daughter. The discussion ends when Sam takes Amy’s hand and leads her away.

It’s only then that Heart gives me his full attention, but his eyes are narrowed and his face drawn. I don’t know what to expect as he approaches.

His hand touches my shoulder and gives a gentle push out into the main room. He points to a table and holds up his hand to Fergus. Almost before we’re seated, there’s a beer and a white wine in front of me.

“Spit it out, Heart. What’s happened?” He barely resembles the man who I was in bed with last night. “Or are you having regrets about what we did?” Get things out in the open, clear the air.

“Last night shouldn’t have happened.” He confirms that I’m right. “There can be nothing between us, you know that as well as me.”

“Didn’t mean anything,” I start to say.

“No, it didn’t,” he interrupts. “Look, Marc. Even if you weren’t a cop, I’m not in the right place to start anything. I took what you offered, and I’m ashamed that I used you. You’re not a club whore.”

I’m certainly not. But I treated him the same way. “Don’t let it worry you, Heart. Let’s mark it up to experience and put it behind us.”

He stares down at his beer. “Thing is, Drum’s got my head all screwed up. Givin’ you the ol’ lady label was a step too far. Brothers have started thinkin’ that way, and that’s gonna cause trouble in the club.”

“Because of what I do.”

“Yeah.” He picks up the bottle, downing half of it in one. “But you’re here for the duration, until we get to the bottom of whatever’s going on.” His eyes meet mine for perhaps the first time. “I want to know what you know. See if we can’t kickstart this thing. At the moment we’re going around in circles tryin’ to understand.”

“What do you want to ask?” I take a sip of my wine, working on stopping my hand shaking. Reading between the lines he’s not going to let what I thought was our friendship come between him and his club. Not that I really expected it, but he’ll be giving me my cue to leave as soon as he can. And after today, having seen such a different side to a biker club, I’m no longer sure that’s what I want.

His hands play with the bottle, picking at the label. “Leonardo Herrera is no longer head of the clan. His son, Javier, has taken over. You aware of that?”

I shake my head. “If it’s happened recently I’ve not been in the loop.”

“Why do you think your sergeant was so adamant about protectin’ Archer’s reputation?”

Now that I have thought about it. “Archer’s dead, so it makes no odds to him. The Herrera family might want to protect their name.” I grimace quickly, not knowing how much I should tell him, what I know comes from police reports. “We all know the cartel’s at the top of the chain, everyone below picks up scraps or works for them. It’s they who deal in the skin trade. If Archer stepped into that territory, the Herreras might want to keep that quiet.”

That doesn’t come as news to him. Suddenly he slams his now empty bottle down on the table. “For fuck’s sake, Marc. You must know who would want to take you out?”

I reel back, his force startling me. “Heart, I don’t know. The only thing I’ve done is present my suspicions and my evidence against Archer. I haven’t been here long enough to work on many other cases, and there’s nothing else I can think of.”

“If you’re right, and the Herrera’s are behind the efforts to shut you down permanently, then you’re puttin’ the club up against that family. And fuck knows where the cartel stands in this.”

“Cartel would have shut them down themselves if they found they were dipping into their trade.” Again, I get the feeling there’s something he’s not telling me.

Before either of us can say anything more, Sam comes over, her eyes flicking to me then to him. Then her hand rests on his shoulder. “Ten minutes?” she asks.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” As the prez’s woman gives me a friendly smile and walks away, he turns to me. “I’m going up to the suite.”

“I’ll come with you. I could do with an early night.”

A quick glance my way, and I realise I’ve alluded to last night being a late one. And raised the spectre of our indiscretion in both our head’s once again.

While I’ve no real reason to go to bed this early, I don’t much fancy the idea of staying in the clubhouse as the old ladies go home and the sweet butts come in to service the men. Add to that, none of these men are particularly friendly, and won’t want to talk with a cop in the room. When Heart stands I get to my feet as well. At least it will save him assigning another babysitter to me.

But before we can reach the door Drummer gets his attention. “Heart, need to speak to you.”

“I’ll go on up.” I start walking again, but get a hand forcefully holding my arm.

“Prospect? See Marc up to her room, will ya?”

And there, I’ve picked up a minder again. I bristle. I had no intention of going anywhere else. Particularly after this afternoon and my good time with the ol’ ladies. I’m not here as a spy, and it hurts that Heart believes I might take the opportunity to poke around and try to find evidence on the club. It’s another confirmation that we can never mix.

I enter the suite, knowing Hyde is waiting outside. My jailor until Heart returns. I’ve left my bedroom door open, as instructed.

I’ve only time to visit the bathroom and freshen up before the outer door opens, but it’s not the man I expected, it’s Sam and Amy.

“Hi. Heart wanted Amy to sleep in his room tonight. Is he around?”

“Still speaking to your old man, I think.” So that’s Heart’s plan, to put a buffer between us. That would work.

“Oh, well, I doubt he’ll be long. I’ll get her settled, shall I?” She appears a little flustered.

Knowing she’s got a young baby of her own to look after, I cross the room and go to the hallway. “Why don’t you leave her with me for a bit? We’ll be fine, won’t we, Amy?”

Remembering me as the woman who was playing with her most of the day, Amy grins, showing she’s got no problem with my suggestion.

Sam looks relieved. “Thanks Marcia. Jayden wanted to get away, so I’d love to get back to Eli.” Then as she turns her attention to the child, her face becomes stern. “Marcia’s going to get you ready for bed, Amy. You be a good girl now, you hear? And don’t play up.” She hands me a book. “It’s her bedtime story. She likes this one. She’ll be tired after the day, and so should soon be asleep. Just don’t get her hyped up or she’ll never go down.”

I’m grateful for the tip, not having been around children. No boisterous games if I want her to sleep. Got it.

“We’ll be fine,” I repeat, holding out my hand for the girl.

“She just needs a quick bath, then here’s her night clothes.” Sam turns her tired eyes to me. “Are you sure this is okay.”

Bending, I lift Amy into my arms. “You go get some rest, Sam, you look like you need it. And I’ll sort this one out.”

Sam’s hand touches mine and gives it a squeeze. “You’re a life saver.”

As she walks out the door I’m not sure about that, but following instructions I put Amy in the tub, then get her out and dry her. Once she’s in her Disney nightie, I put her to bed. It’s a single, but there’s room enough for me to lie on top while she’s snuggling under the covers. I open the book and start to read.

There’s some pop-out shit, and Amy loves seeing the pictures of animals snap out as I turn the pages. So it’s natural to start making sounds. Soon she’s in fits of giggles and laughter, especially when I make a cow bark.

“Cows don’t bark.”

“Don’t they?” I act surprised, then neigh like a horse.

“Nope. They don’t do that.” She’s shaking her head so seriously, I bite back another laugh.

“What sound do they make then?”

She jumps up and sits astride me, her little face beaming. “They go mooo silly.”

“Oh, I’m silly now, am I?”

Forgetting Sam’s instruction to keep her quiet, I tickle her. Soon she’s crying and begging me to stop, so I halt my torture.

With a child’s innocence she throws herself into my arms, kisses my cheek and cries out, “Love you, Marcia.”

“What the fuck?”

The loudly barked exclamation has my head turning to find a furious-looking Heart standing by the door. After a second he throws down one of his crutches, and balancing on the other, swings himself over to me. His hand bites into my arm.

“Amy, get yourself back into bed. I’ll come and see you in a minute.” His barely controlled anger makes his voice harsh, and I can see Amy’s lip trembling as she hurries to obey.

“It’s alright, sweetheart. Daddy’s not upset with you. He just wants to speak to me.” Leaning down I plant a kiss on her forehead, and then am ripped away by that grip on my arm.

“Get in your room, now,” he growls.

Not wanting Amy to get distressed, I give her a confident smile, then do as instructed. Behind me I hear quiet murmuring, and can only hope he’s settling her down.

It’s not only the child that doesn’t understand his sudden burst of temper. I have absolutely no idea what I seem to have done wrong. I’m pacing my room when he comes in, shutting the door behind him.

He hisses, “You keep away from Amy, you hear? She’s my fuckin’ daughter, not yours.”

I don’t have a clue what he’s talking about. “Heart, I was just looking after her. You were delayed, and Sam had to get back to Eli. I was helping out, is all.”

“It was more than that. You’ve been getting in tight with her all day! Teaching her to ride a bike, swim. All the things that I can’t fuckin’ do.” He comes in and looms over me, reaching out his hand and grasping my hair, pulling my head back. “You’ve been doing it on purpose, and it fuckin’ worked, didn’t it? I heard what she said to you.”

“Kids love everyone! Even I know that. She meant nothing by it, Heart. She’d probably tell any of the women, fuck, any of your brothers who put her to bed that she loved them.”

He lets me go so fast I almost lose my balance, but manage to recover it. Placing my hands on my hips, I glare at him.

“She said it to you. Bet you thought everything was going to plan.”

“Plan?” I shake my head, completely at a loss here. What am I supposed to be planning?

“Yeah, your plan.” He advances again. “You never told me, did you? That crucial fact that you can’t have kids.”

My eyes widen. It’s true, I never did. It didn’t come up. And it’s not something you casually drop into conversation with a friend. I’d only told the old ladies this afternoon, as the subject occurred naturally. And that’s how he knows. “Heart, it’s not something you needed to know. I only told the old ladies…”

“And luckily they told me. And with all the other things I’ve heard, it’s all fallen into fuckin’ place.”

Bemused, I can only stare at him.

“You tried to get your hands on Amy while I was still in a fuckin’ coma. Wanted her off the compound. And now I reckon you want her for yourself. To make up for kids you can’t fuckin’ have.”

I gasp. He couldn’t be further from the truth. “You’re wrong…”

“I’m right. All the time you befriended me it was because you had the hots for her. You never wanted to leave her in an Outlaw Motorcycle Gang, did you?” That he’s so angry is indicated by the way his voice, dripping with sarcasm, gives his club the name law enforcement use for it. “All those times you were gettin’ close to me over the past months was to get to her.”

“Heart. What you’re saying is ridiculous. Next you’ll be saying I planted the bomb myself. Arranged for a drive by shooting.”

His eyebrows go up. “Well, did you?”

I throw my hands in the air. “Just listen to yourself, Heart. Yeah, of course I can make an explosive. Though obviously I’m not good enough as I cracked my skull and got burned in the process.”

“Just shows how fuckin’ incompetent you are.” If he was shouting at the top of his voice I’d understand it, but his tone is icy cold, which is worse. “Just like you’re only half a woman and unable to have a baby yourself.”

I slap his face. Hard.

He grins, but it’s not from amusement. “Caught you out, ain’t I, darlin’. Fucked up your plan now I know. I’ll make sure you’re not given a chance to get close to Amy or any of the babies while you’re here.”

“I’m not staying.”

“Oh yes you are. You’ll be stayin’ until we get to the bottom of what you really want. If I was suspicious before about you wantin’ to bring down the club, I’m even more so now.” His face twists as if he can’t stand looking at me anymore, and then just as quickly as he arrived, he’s gone.

Forgetting his own instructions, he bangs my door closed, and then I hear a sound like an echo as he shuts his.

My hand covers my mouth to stifle a cry. He’s wrong. Totally wrong. How has he come up with a twisted story like this?

You’re only half a woman. His cruel words cause a sob to burst from my throat. It wasn’t just my whole family the accident had taken from me, but the chance to give birth to a new life, to start a family of my own. Half a woman. As though a dam burst inside me, huge cries wrack my body, tears flooding down my cheeks and swelling my eyes. I fall to the floor and curl up into a ball, my body shuddering and shaking with grief. Letting it out worse than when the doctors had first pronounced my fate, mourning that I can’t, yearning for a chance that somehow I could be a whole woman.

Heart’s voiced my worst fears, that a man would see me for less than I am because of my inability to bear him a child. But to consider for one second that I’d wanted to remove a kid from a good home? It’s unbelievable. But obviously doesn’t seem so to the man in the next room.

It’s true all those months ago, when I first came onto the compound I was worried about Heart’s daughter, but only because I knew her unfit grandmother was trying to get custody, and I knew nothing about these bikers. But once I’d seen the love they had for the child, and had met Sam, her main caregiver, all my doubts disappeared. I would have reported a child being neglected, but that wasn’t the case with Amy.

And during my conversations with Heart while he was on the road, I said everything I could to reunite father and daughter. How could he have forgotten? How the fuck did he come up with the thought that I had all of this planned?

By the time I stop crying it’s dark and silent around. I pace my room, knowing the last thing I want to do is stay on the compound one moment longer. It would kill me to be kept isolated, with the women I grew friendly with today eyeing me suspiciously and keeping their children out of my way. Would anyone else think the same as him? Even if they didn’t, this is such a close band of men and women, they’d side with him and listen to whatever he had to say.

My fingers touch the side of my face which Amy had kissed, a spur of the moment action along with those sweet words. I can’t see I’ve done anything wrong. I’m going to miss that kid.

I bundle together the amount of clothes I’ll be able to carry, constructing a makeshift bag from one of my sweatshirts. Make sure my phone’s charged, slip that, my charger and my wallet into my pockets, and then sit to wait.

Bikers party until late. If I want to sneak out undetected I need to wait until the early hours of the morning. At least with Heart’s door closed he won’t hear me go.

At four in the morning I tiptoe out of my suite, out of the main door to the bloc, and dressed in black, quietly walk down the road. Nothing stirs, all is silent.

A decision, the rat bike or the Kawasaki. I may forfeit the one I leave here. Deciding on speed, I take the tarpaulin off my 7/11, regretting I’ve not even a helmet with me. I won’t be breaking the law in Arizona, but it’s my personal preference to wear a lid to stay safe.

Knowing it’s the least of my worries, I wheel it to the gate.

“Where d’ya think you’re going?”

I didn’t expect anyone to be on guard. Turning, I notice a yawning prospect, the one called Hyde, who’s already got in trouble because of me.

What do I care about these bikers? The ones I now feel are keeping me prisoner rather than giving me protection.

I move closer, swaying my hips suggestively, his eyes focusing on my assets rather than my face. I hold out one hand and touch him on the chest. He’s taken unawares, not sure how to take my seductive routine. My other hand comes up the side of it and slices hard against the brachial nerve in his neck.

He falls unconscious at my feet.

Hoping I haven’t done him any permanent damage, I press the button that opens the gates, jump onto my bike and fly down that track as though the Satan’s Devils are behind me. Which they will be. That gate was alarmed.