I held my drink a little tighter as I looked at Celia from across the bar slash lounge slash restaurant that Sam’s friend owned. She ran into some editor from her publishing house and had been talking to him since we got here. Before walking off to continue her conversation, she handed me a bourbon concoction and told me to approach a man I was attracted to and flirt with him.

“That’s step one,” she’d said. “I’m sure you know where the rest leads.”

Find a man I was attracted to and flirt with him. If it wasn’t for Celia pushing me to do this, I would’ve gladly stayed home. Still. It seemed simple enough. I scanned the bar, feeling flutters in my stomach. There were a ton of good-looking guys, but I couldn’t just go up to one. Could I? One guy across the bar met my gaze and I stiffened, bringing the tiny straw up to my lips and glancing away quickly but not quickly enough. He was making his way over and I took a step back, looking up with a smile when he neared. Oh my god. Why did I ever look around? It was Cody, and he looked non-too-happy to see me here.

“You look like you’re trying to disappear into the topiary,” he said.

I smiled. “I was going to call you. I swear.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I started working and between that and Miles, things haven’t exactly been . . . smooth.”

“Yet, here you are, having a drink at a bar like a grown-up.”

“Would you believe me I told you Celia made me do it?”

He titled his head and shook it slightly before letting out a bark of laughter. “Actually, I would. I’m glad you’re here.”

I kind of pushed myself into his hug, holding my drink away from us. When I pulled back, he eyed it.

“What are you drinking?”

“I’m not really sure. It has a lot of bourbon and a little bit of something else I can’t quite place because, well, the bourbon.”

He chuckled, clinking his glass against mine just as Sam and Chloe sidled up next to us. “Hi, Cody!” Chloe gave him a side hug as Sam shot me a questioning look. I just shrugged, not knowing how to explain Cody being at the grand opening.

The longer I stood there, the more fucked up I felt, and not just with my drink. It was messed up that I didn’t call Cody when I got Stateside when he’d called me every time he landed in a city he knew I’d be in for a convention.

“You want to join us for dinner?” Chloe asked.

Cody looked at me, as if waiting for an answer.

I smiled. “Why not?”

“Sure.”

On our walk over, I stopped and told Celia I was going next door for dinner and asked her to join us.

“I’ll pass but come back when you’re done. I’ll be here.” She said hi to Cody, who was behind me and looked at me again, saying everything she could possibly say with those expressive eyes of hers. I shot her a warning glance.

“Sam, buy her another drink,” Celia said.

“I’m on it,” Sam said behind me.

“I got it,” Chloe added, wiggling one of the glasses in her hand before handing it over. “This one’s yours.”

We sat in a large booth—Sam and Chloe beside each other, Cody and I across from them. I took a sip of the drink Chloe had given me and eyed the menu.

“I’m not really hungry and don’t want to lose my buzz, so I am just going to sit and drink while I wait for dessert.”

“I think I’ll do the same,” Chloe announced.

“I guess I’ll stay sober,” Sam said.

“How’s Miles handling being in the states?” Cody asked.

“He loves it. He’s still in daycare. Full day.”

“He can probably teach his peers a thing or two. Kid started reading when he was two years old,” Sam said, interrupting. “He talks about things I didn’t even know kids knew about.”

“That’s impressive.”

“He’s the cutest,” Chloe added.

“Are you talking about me again, Chloe?”

I nearly jumped out of my skin at his voice and then shot Sam a glare for not warning me that Rowan would be here.

“Not talking about you.” Chloe smiled and shook her head.

“I thought you said you weren’t coming,” Sam said.

“You aren’t glad I’m here?”

Cody’s phone started to vibrate on the table and he glanced at the screen before giving me an apologetic look. “I’ll be right back.”

I sighed, watching him walk off. Rowan took the opportunity to slide into the booth beside me, so close I could smell his cologne. I wanted to rip it off him and stomp on it and all of the memories it brought back.

“I didn’t want to miss the grand opening. It looks nice, Sam. Really nice.” He looked around for good measure. I took a healthy gulp of my drink, which was completely going straight to my head.

“I am such a bitch,” I said.

Sam cleared his throat and made a show of picking up the menu. “Maybe we should order you some food.”

“Leave her alone. She’s getting laid tonight. She’s allowed to loosen up,” Chloe said.

I felt Rowan stiffen beside me. Was it me or was he seriously too close to me? I started to feel hot and pressed closer to the inside of the booth, taking another sip before Sam lifted the glass from my hand and set it on his side of the table.

“Hey!”

“Nope. You shouldn’t be going home with anyone if you’re tipsy,” Sam commented.

“What if it’s Cody?” Chloe asked in a mock whisper.

“Especially not if it’s Cody.” I frowned. “I’m not trying to ruin a friendship. I was supposed to click with some random guy and fuck him. One-night stand, you know?”

Rowan exhaled heavily beside me. He waved down the waitress and ordered himself a scotch, neat.

“He’s cute though, right?” I looked at Chloe. She nodded, eyes wide.

“Make it a double please,” Rowan told the waitress. “And bring two.”

I glanced over to him. He looked so fucking good. He smelled so fucking good too. I may have said that aloud, because his eyes sparkled. Maybe he read my mind. Either way, I added, “I hate you.”

“That makes two of us,” he replied.

“Maybe Ro and I should go talk to some people while you guys eat,” Sam said.

“So, this guy Cody is just your friend?” Rowan asked casually, completely ignoring his brother. “Not your boyfriend?”

“Boyfriend?” Chloe scoffed. “Do you know her?”

Rowan’s eyes were smoldering when they met mine. “Oh, I know her.”

“Rowan.” My voice may have sounded a little breathless and a lot needy. His eyes darkened even more. He put his hand beside mine on the booth, his fingertips touching mine, my pulse jumping with the simple move. I couldn’t make myself look away, not even as Chloe continued talking about my and Cody’s friendship. Somehow, Rowan’s hand ended up over mine completely, his eyes on me as if he were afraid to look anywhere else. With each passing second, I felt my breath slip away a little more.

“Don’t go home with him,” he whispered.

“You have no right to ask that of me,” I whispered back.

“I know I don’t, and that fucking kills me, but please, don’t go home with him.”

“If I asked you not to go home to your wife, would you listen?” I needed to break this spell, but I couldn’t seem to gather the strength to actually do it, a shortcoming I blamed on the bourbon. Definitely.

“Stop calling her my wife,” he said.

“Isn’t that what she is?”

“On paper.”

“Isn’t that all a marriage is? A piece of paper?”

“Tessa.” It was a groan, a plea. I moved my hand from underneath his and put it on my lap, he reached over and grabbed it again, threading his fingers through mine. “It’s a sham, and you know it.” It was the caress of his thumb across the sensitive skin of my wrist that made heat pool between my legs. I gripped his hand tighter in warning. He looked like he was having a hard time not touching me.

Cody walked back to the table and I forced myself to tear my gaze away from Rowan and sit upright.

“I think I may try Tessa’s diet tonight,” Cody said.

“Cody, tell Sam we’ve never slept together.” Cody chuckled, but his eyes held no amusement. Rowan’s hand tightened around mine beneath the table.

“We haven’t,” he said and then looked at Rowan. “Nice to see you again.”

“Likewise,” Rowan responded in a voice that sounded anything but pleasant.

Sam put his menu down again. “Ro, let’s go talk to—”

“No, I’m perfectly fine right here,” Rowan said, interrupting Sam. The waitress brought his drinks and set them in front of him before asking if we were ready to order. Sam ordered three appetizers for the table and shot me a warning look as I grabbed my drink back.

“You’re so bossy today.” I giggled. Fucking giggled, and I didn’t even care that I sounded like a child. I felt good. I felt free. I hadn’t experienced the New York nightlife and if this was it, I was totally about it. I mean, as long as Miles was home sleeping it wasn’t as if I was missing out on anything. Not even Rowan could dampen my mood.

“Have you taken Miles anywhere fun?” Cody asked.

“Not yet. I’m telling you, we haven’t had time.”

“Miles?” Rowan asked. His grip tightened. Our gazes clashed and I swore my whole world pitched on its axis.

Cody’s phone buzzed again. He exhaled loudly. “Sorry. Be right back.”

“Tessa, why don’t you and Rowan switch seats?” Sam suggested, clearly trying to save me. “So, you won’t have to speak over the table?”

“Good idea.” I tried to take my hand back from Rowan’s.

“Absolutely not.”

“What? Why not?” I pulled my hand again.

“Because I’m comfortable here.”

“That’s a stupid reason.” I raised an eyebrow, shook my hand in his once more. Finally, he let go, but he didn’t move.

“You want me to switch seats so you can flirt? No.”

His words hit me quick and hard. I blinked. Even in my tipsy state I could tell that he was jealous. Jealous! For some reason, I found it both humorous and offensive.

“You got married,” I said in what I thought was a hushed whisper but probably wasn’t. “Seriously. Switch seats.”

“Ro, switch seats with her.” Sam’s voice was almost a plea.

“This is unbelievable.” Rowan slid out of the booth and I followed, taking a deep breath when I stood. He caught my elbow, those blue eyes intense on mine, and leaned in. “For the record, I don’t like seeing you flirt with other men.”

“For the record, I don’t like seeing you married to other women.” I yanked my elbow away.

He glowered at me another beat before sliding into the booth. I slid in after, staying closer to Cody’s side. When he walked back toward the booth, he smiled wide.

“I like this seating arrangement,” he announced, sliding in beside me and leaning close to whisper, “You okay with you-know-who? What’s the deal with that situation?”

“Nothing. There is no deal.” I tried—and failed—to laugh it off. “No deal. Get it?” I was looking at Rowan, who was watching me like he wanted to flip this table over and kill someone. It made me smile wider. I definitely needed to drink more water. I pulled a glass to me.

Sam cleared his throat from the other side of the table just as my phone vibrated in my purse. A text message alert. I fished it out and looked at it.

Sam: You need to tell him. You just said Miles’s name.

I rolled my eyes, but my heart did a little thrash as I typed out a quick response.

Me: I need time.

Sam: He isn’t an idiot.

Me: You knew I named him Miles, you’ve seen him a million times, and you still say you didn’t know.

I glanced up at Sam. His eyes met mine, narrowing in warning. My phone buzzed again.

Sam: Stop talking to Cody about Miles in front of him. It’s fucked up.

Me: I’m fucked up.

Sam: Trust me, we all know that. Stop drinking if you’re really going home with him. PS. I don’t think you should.

Me: Thanks, Dad.

Sam: Trying to look out for you.

That made my frown deepen. Cody spoke and took my attention off the situation, but my mind stayed on Sam and the texts and Rowan, who I couldn’t seem to get away from no matter where I went. Whose face I saw every time I looked at the little boy who owned my heart.