I’d been on the phone with Ryan Ford the entire morning. His flight had been delayed, so instead of canceling the meetings, we’d conferenced in the marketing director and the accounting department to update everyone on this week’s agenda and key performance indicators. Chloe knocked on the door and peeked her head in just as I was hanging up the phone with him. Her brows rose when she took in the expression on my face.

“Uh-oh. Should I have listened in on that call to take notes?”

“He’ll be in and out of the office tomorrow, but I have to take over the meeting with the sock company. He’s emailing me details as we speak, and . . . I think that’s basically it. How are Seth and Tommy coming along on the car and hotel?”

“They already finalized the leather for the car. They want your input on the design when you get a chance.” She jotted everything down on her digital clipboard and looked up when she was done. “They are still waiting on the files from marketing to see what the rest of the hotels look like. Since we have to bid to work on it, they are obviously looking for something different.”

“Agreed.” I leaned my head against my chair and closed my eyes, letting the to-do list run rampant in my mind.

“Rumor has it the owner of the hotel is Ryan Ford’s brother.”

My eyes popped open. “How do you know this? And why would Ryan work here if his family is in the hotel business?”

“No clue. Like I said, it’s just a rumor around the break room.” She smiled. “You know, the place lowly employees hang out in.”

“Shut up.” I clicked on the email from Ryan and forwarded it to Chloe.

She laughed as she stood. “I’m going to go confirm the meeting for today and then I’ll let Seth know.”

“Perfect.”

We’d be using the same textiles company for all of our projects, and if I were the one going to those meetings, I’d definitely need to get acquainted with the place. We had three big accounts to focus on, but I had to give the socks attention as well. I was a firm believer that no company was too small to thrive, and if they were taking a chance on us with their fabrics, it was only fair that we take one on them with our designs. Once she left, I got on the phone with marketing so they could fill me in on whatever they’d dug up on the companies and their audience.

Once I was assured I’d have the information by this afternoon, I opened the file Ford had sent me and frowned as I pushed the speaker button and called Chloe.

“Yes?”

---

“This company has no name?”

“Which one? The textiles? I included it in my last email to you.”

I clicked on that and froze. “Hawthorne? Are you kidding?”

“Uh, no. I thought you’d be happy. Sam will be there.”

I opened my mouth, closed it, opened it, and closed it once more. Sam would be there. So would Rowan if he was in town. Maybe he wasn’t. Still, it didn’t change the fact that I’d probably have to see him at some point, and wasn’t that what I wanted deep down? A way to finally fess up about Miles and take this load off my chest? But not like this. I hadn’t really planned on it going over like this.

I was still a nervous wreck on the inside as Chloe, Seth, and I left for the meeting. I had wanted Tommy to come, but Chloe had convinced me that he was better off at the office working on the hotel bid since that was our biggest project.

Seth and Chloe tossed around concepts for the car. I barely paid attention, too consumed with thoughts of seeing Rowan. I’d sent Samson no fewer than ten text messages, all of which went unanswered.

“What about apples? Too corny?” Chloe asked.

I blinked. “Corny.”

“Not good,” Seth agreed.

Chloe took out her clipboard and made a note.

“Do you take that thing everywhere?” Seth asked.

“Everywhere,” I said.

“That is not true,” Chloe argued.

I looked at Seth and whispered, “Everywhere.”

He chuckled. Chloe rolled her eyes but smiled because she totally did take it everywhere. Not only that. She had two of them—one big and one small.

“Why not just use a smartphone?” Seth asked, waving his One Plus.

“Ew, Android,” I said, trying to make my voice normal and get back into the mind frame I’d been in when we left the office.

“Android is so much—”

I put my hand up as we got out of the subway and walked toward the office. Chloe was actually using her phone to map the way. “I know. They update their software all the time and you can download it yourself. I understand the hype. I just don’t like it.”

“Because it isn’t pretty.”

“No, because it isn’t practical.”

Seth scoffed.

“We make a right here,” Chloe announced. We followed.

“It is practical. You just said we can update the software,” Seth said.

“Yeah, so can I, by doing the update.”

“It isn’t the same.”

“Can we just agree that all phones are awesome because if it weren’t for technology we’d be using a legit paper map right now and Seth would be arguing that we were going the wrong way and refusing to ask for directions?” Chloe eyed Seth as he pulled open the door to the building.

When I stepped in, I tried to do as Rowan would have done and shoved my feelings into a box and lock it. It seemed to work as we took the elevator to the fifth floor and exited, but then panic gripped me, tightening its fist around my heart. I may have to work with him and if I did, there wouldn’t be any way for me to keep him from finding out about Miles. Again, I reminded myself that it was what I’d wanted. I wanted to tell him. I wanted him to be in Miles’s life. I just didn’t want her to be in it too. The thought of Camryn hit me like a brick.

“Are you okay?” Chloe asked, grasping my shoulders to steady me. I hadn’t realized I’d stumbled.

Samson came rushing from behind her. He placed a hand on her shoulder and gently moved her out of the way so he could take her spot. “I just saw your texts.”

“A little late.”

“Are you okay?” he asked, his eyes scanning my face. “What’s happening? What’s the emergency?”

I fought the tears I felt rushing as I looked at him, my dear friend, who’d been there for me when I was down, whom I worried about when he was down, who shipped gifts for Miles and visited him and treated him like his own blood without knowing that he actually was. It wasn’t until that very moment that the magnitude of it all hit me. The lies I’d weaved started to wrap around my neck slowly, keeping the truth from spilling out.

“What’s wrong?” Sam asked again, concern shining in his eyes. I tried to blink away the tears but blinking only made them trickle down my face quicker.

“I have to tell you something.”

He grabbed my arm and ushered me away from Chloe and Seth, down the corridor, and outside the glass doors I’d just walked through. Once we were out of earshot, he faced me.

“What’s going on?”

I took a shaky breath and wiped my face. “Miles isn’t Cody’s.”

His eyes widened slightly, his lips parting as he stared at me. After what felt like an eternity, he cleared his throat. “Why are you telling me this now?”

“He’s Rowan’s.” I swallowed the knot in my throat and blinked away briefly, still feeling like I could barely breathe.

“Are you . . . Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I couldn’t.” My stomach started to hurt. I pressed a hand there. “I didn’t want Miles anywhere near Camryn or your mother. With me living in another country, I just wasn’t sure what . . . I made a mistake,” I whispered, wiping new tears. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to hide it from you, but then you assumed Cody was the father, and I let you because I wasn’t ready to tell Ro and I didn’t want you to carry this burden.”

“You need to tell him, Tessa.” His jaw twitched. “He deserves to know.”

“I’ll do it, I swear I will. I just need time.”

“Tessa.” Sam heaved a deep breath, covering his face with both his hands before raking them through his hair. “Oh my god.”

“I know. I’m so sorry.” I reached for his arm, holding him by the wrist. “You know I love you like a brother and Miles thinks of you as an uncle just like Freddie. I was just trying to protect him—”

He dropped his hands and raised his gaze to mine. “This is going to break my brother’s heart.”

I wanted to argue that, but the tightening in my throat wouldn’t ease up. I wanted to remind him that his brother wasn’t like us, he didn’t feel things the way we did, but there was no use. I didn’t know Rowan anymore. For all I knew, the depiction I’d drawn up in my head of him working twenty-four seven and ignoring Miles was wrong. Maybe he’d see Miles and experience the pureness that he brought and decide he wanted to keep him around. It was hard to turn that kind of love away. The unconditional, maddening love that split you in two but made it impossible to live without it. If this had been the other way around, I’d be heartbroken without question.