On the last Wednesday of every month, Kina and I went out. Sometimes life got so busy that if we didn’t have a standing arrangement, we wouldn’t see each other for weeks on end. So we made sure to keep this routine unless something really urgent or important came up.

We always met at Jada Cole’s, where they had cocktails and live music, and a very unassuming atmosphere. Unlike some of the hang outs in this city, you didn’t have to act pretentious to be there. After spending all day every day teaching people to pretend, coming here was always a nice break away from the rat race.

Jada Cole’s had wooden panel walls and tiled floors with a bar along the one side, a stage on the other, and wooden tables and chairs in the middle. Kina and I sat at the bar. It was easier and quicker to get our hands on alcohol that way, and the bartender knew us well enough to make anyone who bothered us go away.

Not only did we have a regular meeting spot and a regular meet up date, but we also had regular drinks. We always kicked the night off with mojitos. Tonight, we talked about work, ranted about stupid bosses, and drank another round of mojitos before we ordered tequila. After that, we always got serious.

“So, are you still flying solo, or have you decided on your new fling, yet?” Kina asked. “It’s been awhile since Luke now.”

I shook my head. “Not long enough.” I thought about Hanson, but he didn’t count. What I’d done with him, although fantastic, had been a mistake.

“Just casual one-night stands for now,” I said.

“Yeah, me too,” Kina said. I ordered a Cosmo. Kina raised her eyebrows. “You’re mixing a lot, tonight. This is going to get you fucked.”

I shrugged. “Sometimes it’s good to let loose, right?”

The Cosmo arrived. Kina had ordered another mojito. She was being careful.

“I guess so,” she said. “I think it depends on how far you go.”

“Like sleeping with Hanson?” I asked.

Kina blinked at me.

“You slept with Hanson?” she asked.

I shrugged. I sucked on the little straw that came with the cocktail. My head spun slowly, my veins were on fire, and I couldn’t feel my legs. The latter was because of the tequila. I also had an urgent need for sex. That would be the alcohol in general.

“Are you being serious?” Kina asked. “I thought you said—”

“I know, I know,” I said, interrupting her. “But he was hot as hell, and he kissed me, and I couldn’t help it. He’s fucking good, too.”

Kina raised her eyebrows. “The way you’re sucking on that straw as if you’re trying not to burst while you tell me all of this, it has to be more than just good sex.”

I frowned. “What do you mean?”

Kina shook her head. “Nothing. It just seems dangerous. Doesn’t it? Won’t that screw up your business relationship with him? Or even your business in general? You know the reputation he has.”

I shook my head. “You know I can hide this shit, right?” I spoke with the straw clenched between my teeth in the corner of my mouth. “This is what I do for a living. Besides, it’s not like it’s going to happen again.”

I didn’t know if I believed myself. I didn’t get the feeling Kina believed me, either.

“I’ve heard this before,” she said.

“When?” I asked.

“On Saturday, when you’d told me you wouldn’t sleep with him the first time.”

Oh. Right. I shook my head.

“I mean it,” I said.

Kina sipped her cocktail a lot slower than I drank mine.

“What was he like?” she asked after a beat.

I grinned. I’d known she would ask. She was curious. It was the famous Hanson Bell we were talking about, after all.

“Big. He knew what he was doing. A little rough, but in a nice way.”

Kina shook her head, smiling. “He would be good at it. He’s been with a lot of women, Lacey. Doesn’t that bother you?”

I shook my head. “I’ve been with enough men of my own. Casual sex has a way of increasing one’s numbers, and you know that the only kind of sex I have is casual.”

Kina laughed, but I couldn’t help correcting myself in my head, to the past tense.

The only kind of sex I used to have was casual.

Of course, I wasn’t going to say that out loud. If Kina was already this disapproving, she’d never want to hear how far I’d let a fantasy play out in my mind.

“So, who am I to judge?” I asked her, keeping the conversation on surface things.

It wasn’t like I loved the guy or anything. What he did with his life had nothing to do with me.

Even as I thought it, I knew it was just something I was telling myself. Kina was right. I was in too deep. I was fucked.

“I can’t believe you slept with one of the Florida Sharks’ players,” Kina said.

I shook my head. “Technically, I didn’t, because he’s suspended.”

Kina rolled her eyes. “Yeah, that makes all the difference.”

I chuckled.

When we finally left, I was a lot drunker than I’d meant to be. When I stood, I felt all the alcohol. My balance was questionable, and my skin burned.

“I got you,” Kina said when she saw me stumble. She put her arm around my waist, and we walked outside together. She hailed a cab and helped me in.

“You’re not coming?” I asked.

She shook her head. I nodded, not trying to argue or ask why not. She gave the driver my address and closed the door, shutting me in.

“Be safe!” she called through the window.

I waved at her when the cab pulled away. There was barely any traffic, and we slid through the streets. I was hot and bothered. I was horny. Alcohol made me think about sex, and Hanson was on my mind.

I scissored my legs and touched my collarbone. I needed attention. I needed to be touched, and not by myself when I got home.

“Change of destination,” I said to the driver.

I gave him Hanson’s address, which I was ashamed to say I had memorized from his file, and he turned around, heading in the other direction. I couldn’t believe I was doing this. But drunk Lacey’s brain was taking over and doing what normal Lacey’s body wanted.

And what normal Lacey’s body wanted was more Hanson Bell inside of it.