- GARRETT -
March, 2018
Eighteen months later …
Blair was a natural at this baby thing as we held our newborn nephews.
“I still can’t believe my brother procreated,” I said. “And twins. God, there’s two little replicas of him.”
“I can hear you, you know,” Hunter called out from the kitchen of his and Sara’s new house.
“Wasn’t trying to be subtle,” I yelled back. Baby Garrett squirmed in my arms at my loud voice. I started bouncing and rocking him again. “Shh, baby.”
He squawked.
Blair laughed. “Looks like he takes after his namesake.”
“Shut the fu—”
“Language,” Sara chided as she slowly waddled her way into the nursery.
I gave Blair the finger instead of swearing in front of the infants who wouldn’t have known the fucking difference anyway. But I wasn’t going to mention that aloud to the hormonal woman. I thought it stopped once they gave birth, but Hunter warned me that must’ve been a myth or something. Sara was battier than ever.
She winced and grabbed at her stomach as she sat on the rocking chair in the corner.
“Sore?” Blair asked.
She nodded. “C-sections aren’t fun. Just FYI.”
“We’ll remember that for when we go to have our kids,” I said sarcastically.
Blair glared at me for being an ass.
“Sorry,” I muttered.
The baby thing might’ve come up once or twice. He still refused to marry me because it wouldn’t be legally recognised, but he was on board with the baby thing.
It took a good twelve months before he considered committing to any type of future with me. It was his way of protecting himself if I ran away again. I didn’t know why twelve months seemed to be the magic number, but perhaps it was because neither of us had relationships that had lasted that long in the past. He’d been more relaxed these last six months, and I felt as though we were already married.
I was committed to him, and that was never going to change. He just needed a little convincing at first.
I may’ve been getting a bit pushy on the baby subject though. I wanted everything with Blair, and I was never known for my patience. Blair was the patient one for putting up with my shit for so long.
The thing was, it was going to take a long time to get everything we needed. Legislation for same-sex adoption in Queensland only passed in 2016, and the hoop jumping to adopt was still ridiculous. With the surrogate route, we needed an egg donor and a surrogate, and unlike other states where commercial surrogacy was legal, altruistic was our only option. We needed someone to volunteer to carry our baby with no offer of financial compensation. Good luck with that.
“You guys want a baby?” Sara asked.
“Are you offering one of yours?” I quipped. “Maybe we’ll take East. Baby Garrett’s loud.” The baby squawked in my arms again.
Sara laughed. “No. I love you, dear brother-in-law, but you cannot have one of my children.”
I shrugged. “Worth a shot.”
“I can’t believe you let Hunter name your baby East,” Blair said.
“I know! He Kanye’d me,” she said.
“Hey, at least your last name isn’t West,” I pointed out.
“True. But in all seriousness, I’d be willing to donate my eggs if you guys were definitely wanting the baby thing. I wouldn’t feel right carrying the baby—especially if it was biologically mine—but at least the cousins would share DNA if you used my eggs.”
Blair and I both stopped rocking, and the twins started getting antsy and squirmy again.
“For real?” I asked, ignoring the little whimpers coming from the boys.
“For real what?” my brother asked as he came into the room.
“Your wife offered us her eggs,” I said, stunned.
“I told you not to bring that up until they mentioned something about the possibility of a family,” he scolded Sara. “They don’t need that kind of pressure on them.”
“Garrett mentioned a baby!” she exclaimed.
“You guys have actually discussed this?” Blair asked.
Hunter took an upset baby Garrett off me to try to calm him down. “We’d do anything to help you guys. If it’s what you want anyway. I told Sara she shouldn’t push.” Amazingly, baby Garrett settled immediately in his father’s arms. I wanted that.
“She wasn’t pushing,” I said. “She took me by surprise is all.”
“Well, if you find the right oven, take my wife’s eggs. You guys would make awesome dads,” Hunter said.
“I dunno …” Blair hesitated. “I get the feeling I’d always have to be the strict one. Fuck, Garrett’s like a child himself sometimes.”
“Language,” Sara said.
“Sorry,” Blair muttered.
“You’d be strict, but you’d also be nurturing,” I said. “When little Beckham is crying over losing his or her soccer game—and yes, our kid will be named Beckham, and yes, he or she will play soccer, and you can’t argue with me on that—you can be the one to tell them it doesn’t matter whether they win or lose. I’ll be crying into my coffee while hiding in the car so the kid can’t see my disappointment.”
Blair smiled. “I can picture it right now. Except no way in hell are we calling our child Beckham.”
“Come on. Can’t you just imagine a little girl running around in soccer cleats named Beckham? Fu—fudging adorable.”
Sara laughed. “God, they remind us of us,” she said to Hunter and then turned to us. “Solve that problem by having twins, and then you get to pick a name each.”
“No way in hell,” Blair said. “Sorry. The twins are cute and all but—”
“Wait,” I interrupted, “does that mean you chose to name one of the babies Garrett?” I asked Sara.
She shrugged. “I liked the idea of naming one of our kids after the guy who introduced us.”
“I think I just fell in love with you.”
She laughed. “Funnily enough, that’s one of the first things Ryan said to me after we met. But you should know something about baby Garrett. You know how you refuse to call Ryan by his middle name like everyone else does?”
“Hey, you don’t do it either,” I argued.
“Well, we decided to middle name Garrett. Just like Ryan. You were actually holding Tobias. Garrett Tobias Erikson.”
“No. Don’t do it! Garrett is an awesome name. Who needs a nickname?”
Hunter laughed. “Come on, Toby. Mumma needs to feed you.” He handed the baby to Sara who proceeded to whip her boob out.
I turned my attention to Blair who was still holding East. “Well, that settles the name debate. There has to be a kid named after me out there somewhere. Screw Beckham, our kid is going to be called Garrett.”
“What if it’s a girl?” Blair asked.
“Still Garrett.”
He sighed. “How about we play a game of golf to settle it? Winner gets to pick the name.”
“How about you find a surrogate first,” Sara said.
“Hmm,” I grumbled. “Good point.”
***
May, 2018
“I’ll go get you a beer,” Blair said, squeezing my shoulder in a reassuring gesture.
I slumped down in the booth at Friday night pub night, which had become a sad little event lately with it only being me, Blair, Pip, and Gage. The rest of our group had kids now. Everyone except us.
Pip and Gage didn’t count. They were both single. Although, why they hadn’t hooked up yet was beyond me. They obviously loved each other and had been best friends for years. I didn’t get it. I knew Gage had trouble trusting women after some shit went down back in Virginia, but that was when he was a teenager. He was almost thirty now.
My brain laughed. How long did you hold onto your shit from high school?
I sighed loudly.
“What’s up?” Gage asked.
“Surrogate shit,” I mumbled. We hadn’t told anyone we were seriously looking into the kid thing now. Sara was willing to give us the eggs, so we just needed someone to carry the baby. We started looking right after Sara made her grand gesture.
“You guys are having a baby?” Pip practically squealed.
“No. That’s the problem. We can’t find a surrogate we like, and there aren’t many options out there.”
Blair came back with our drinks in time to hear my last sentence. “Correction, we can’t find someone Garrett approves of. He’s already an overprotective dad, and we don’t even have the kid yet.”
“The whole process is so impersonal. They all seem nice, and I think they’re doing a great thing volunteering to help couples become parents, but I want to feel comfortable with the woman carrying our child. I don’t think that’s a lot to ask.”
“Were you looking for egg donation too or purely oven related?” Pip asked.
“Why is a woman’s uterus always referred to as an oven?” Blair wondered aloud.
“Sara said she’d donate her eggs.” I ignored my partner’s pointless question.
Gage cocked his head to the side. “Wouldn’t that mean the twins would have biological cousins who were also biologically their sibling?”
I smiled. “We thought of that. We’re gonna use Blair’s … seed.”
Blair shuddered. “That’s a horrible word. Can’t we stay clinical about this? It’s sperm.”
“Spunk, jizz, cum—”
“You’re so ready to be a dad,” Blair said.
Gage looked pensive.
“What?” I asked him. Of everyone—except Blair—he was the one person who knew me more than the others. He’d become my best friend over the years. My only friend, really.
“Just surprised. You’ve wanted to be a dad for a while, I figured …”
I shrugged. “Blair’s biological child will be as equally mine as it is his. You of all people should know that.”
“I know. Sorry. I don’t know why I jumped to that conclusion.”
“Although,” I added, “it will be a shame he or she is going to miss out on all these awesome Erikson genes.”
Blair punched me in the arm. “Cocky much?”
“Damn fucking gay.”
Blair shook his head. “That’s still not a thing.”
“I’m making it one.”
While Blair, Gage, and I sat there talking shit as usual, I began to relax and push the surrogate thing to the back of my mind. We weren’t in a rush, but I wanted it so bad.
“Have you heard back about your screenplay?” Gage asked Blair, which made my boyfriend glare at me. He hated when I told people about it, but it was because I was proud of him. And he was actually getting somewhere.
“I’ve sold one. I’m working on a few others,” Blair muttered quietly.
“Holy shit, really?” Gage asked. “So, you’re going to have a movie? That’s awes—”
“I sold it, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to get made. Still needs to be green lit by a studio and assigned a director, blah, blah, blah. I’m not getting my hopes up just yet.”
“But still. You sold a manuscript,” Gage said. “That’s an achievement in itself.”
“For about a year’s worth of wages working as a PA,” Blair pointed out. “We’re not exactly shopping for mansions.”
“But imagine if you can do that every year,” I said. “When the baby comes, you can work from home, pump out a few more, sell those, and you’ll never have to fetch someone coffee ever again. Well, you know, except for me, because you love me. And I’m less cranky with a coffee in my hand.”
“And more cocky after you’ve drank it,” Blair pointed out. “I don’t know which is worse. Cocky Garrett or cranky Garrett.”
Pip had gone uncharacteristically quiet for her. Normally she’d be on top of a snipe like that with a snarky comment. I usually couldn’t shut her up at the office.
“Pip,” I said, kicking her under the table. “What’s up with you?”
“I’ll do it,” she blurted.
“Do what?” Blair asked.
“I’ll be your surrogate. If I’m good enough to meet his royal highness’s standards that is.” She bowed at me.
Blair and I, like a few months ago when Sara offered us her eggs, sat stunned by her generosity.
“Pip, no,” Gage said. “That’s crazy.”
“Why’s it crazy?” I asked.
Gage flustered under my stare. “It’s just … I don’t know. Crazy. It’s generous but crazy.” He turned to her. “You do realise what that would involve, right?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I paid attention during sex ed at school, Gage. Who knows, this might be my only chance to carry a baby seeing as the world of dating is shit. I’ll probably die a spinster.”
“And you’d be okay giving the baby up after carrying it for nine months?” Gage asked.
I was surprised how against this he was. Although, he was asking a valid question.
“It wouldn’t be my baby. If it was biologically mine, I’d probably have issues with it. I couldn’t see myself giving away my eggs like Sara—that to me seems more generous than letting them rent my womb for nine months.”
“It’s not a fucking apartment, Pip,” Gage snapped.
Blair shifted in his seat. “It’s a really generous offer, and I don’t think you realise how much we appreciate it, but you should think about this longer than over drinks at the pub.”
“If you’re serious about it though,” I added, “we can give you all the info we have, and you make a decision after that. I’d love for you to do it, but there’s absolutely no pressure, okay?”
She nodded. “I am serious. I love you guys. You’re one of my favourite people to work with, and I’ve known Blair since we were kids. Send me the info, and I’ll read over it.”
Gage, who I couldn’t recall ever seeing angry, looked as if he wanted to murder me. He threw back the rest of his beer and stood from the table. “I’m out. I’ll see you two in the office on Monday. Blair, see you next week.” He walked out before we even had a chance to respond.
“I better go see what’s up his ass. Especially considering he’s my ride.” Pip shuffled out of the booth.
I stood and hugged her before she could run off. “Thank you for even considering this.” I kissed the side of her head and then she left.
When I sat back down, Blair squeezed my thigh under the table. “Don’t get your hopes up like you have with the others.”
“It’s different this time. She’s the one.”
“You don’t know that. She might read over everything and decide against it. Or she might realise how much strain pregnancy puts on a person’s body and chicken out. Or Gage might pull rank on her and forbid her to do it.”
I laughed. “The fact you think Gage has any pull over Pip is hilarious. He tries to get her to do stuff at work, and she basically tells him to fuck off.”
He shook his head. “That’s where you’re wrong. That girl is in love with Gage, but he’s always kept his distance. If he told her not to do something this big, she’d listen.”
“Okay. I won’t get my hopes up.” I wasn’t going to admit it was too late for that.
“It’ll happen for us,” Blair said. “I know patience isn’t your strong suit, but I have faith it’ll happen. Whether this Pip thing works out, or we have to go a different route, we’ll get our baby.”
“Your mother will be pleased when we do,” I scoffed. Blair’s mother still had her issues, but she was trying to accept us. The passive-aggressive comments were still a problem, but they got to Blair more than me. Blair worried her comments would make me run away. I was confident enough in our relationship to know it didn’t matter what she said. Plus, his dad and I got along great. He’d often lean in and whisper for me to ignore her shit, which would make me laugh. I think even he was hoping she’d be over it by now.
“God, I’m not telling her a thing until it’s set in stone,” Blair said.
“Good plan.” I could see her going from distant to overbearing in the blink of an eye if it involved a grandchild—something she’d always wanted.
“What about your parents? Are you going to tell them?” he asked.
“They’ll probably find out if Sara has to go through all that fertility stuff. I don’t think they’ll be as overbearing though seeing as they have East and Toby to dote over already.”
He took a sip of his beer. “Do you ever wonder how our life ended up like this?”
“Here he goes getting philosophical again.”
Blair laughed. “All I’m saying is, seven years ago when I turned up on your doorstep heartbroken and messy, had someone told me that one night would’ve changed everything for me, I would’ve told them they were crazy. I’m in love with Garrett-fucking-Erikson, and we’re going to have a child together. It’s nuts.”
“It’s perfect, Rhodes.”