Quinn
Every morning I get dressed to Finlay’s voice. She waits for Eli to leave for work before she goes outside.
I walk downstairs and go stand in the open door of the kitchen, just listening as she deals through her music.
“I hope you feel ashamed.
I hope your soul is fraying at the seams.
I hope you feel my desperation.
I hope it haunts you until you’re black and blue.”
The cords keep growing more intense, along with her voice. This is the first time she sings with so much anger.
“You stole what wasn’t yours.
Left me crawling on all fours.
You’ve left me black and blue.
They say you reap what you sow,
They say time heals all, but it goes slow,
You’ve left me black and blue.
With no way to show it’s real.
That doesn’t mean I’m not wounded, and that it will never heal.
‘Cause you left me black and blue.”
I turn around before she catches me watching her, but I almost walk into Ethan. His face is ghostly white and his eyes are glued to Finlay. I grab his arm and pull him away. Only when we’re in the living room do I stop.
He takes a step away from me and our eyes meet. I hear Finlay in the kitchen where she’s pouring a glass of water.
I place my finger in front of my lips to show Ethan not to say anything before I walk to the kitchen.
“Hey, are you ready?” I ask, hoping my voice sounds cheerful.
She swallows the sip of water she just took and nods.
“Great.” I grab my bag and keys and head to the front door.
Ethan is already walking towards his truck. He’s tense and I’m scared Finlay will notice.
When she steps out onto the porch, I quickly lock the door behind us.
“Did you lock the back door?” I ask as we walk to the truck.
“Yeah, I placed the keys on the table.”
We get in the truck and Finlay whispers, “Morning.”
Today Ethan just nods. The drive to the gym feels twice as long and even my muscles are starting to tense.
I don’t know what I can do to help Finlay, but I’ll have to do something.
Mrs. Jackson rushes over to me and throws her arms open wide.
“Happy birthday,” she says as she hugs me.
I hold on to her a little longer and it makes her tighten her arms around me. When she pulls back her eyes search mine.
My heart is breaking for Finlay. Her songs tear at me, but I can’t stop listening. Someone needs to hear her pain. Someone has to acknowledge what happened to her was real.
“We’ll talk later, okay?” she asks.
I nod and smile gratefully. She’s become my refuge every time life throws a shit storm at me.
As she walks over to Finlay, I realize how stupid I’ve been. I’ve been thinking of ways I can help Finlay when I should’ve been thinking of Mrs. Jackson. She will know exactly what Finlay is dealing with.
Mrs. Jackson doesn’t hug Finlay. She stands in front of her and it looks like they’re having a conversation with their eyes. Finlay’s are screaming with pain while Mrs. Jackson’s answers with empathy.
Mrs. Jackson takes Finlay’s hand and they walk out of the kitchen.
Ethan comes in and looks at their retreating backs. “Where are they going?”
“Just for a walk. Will you help me carry the food outside?”
I’m spending the day with my family. Even Dad will be here. I can’t wait to see him. It’s the first time that I’ll have them all together.
Ethan helps me with his usual silence. When we’re done and everything is outside, he takes hold of my arm to hold me back.
I look up at him waiting for him to talk.
“Did I do something wrong with Finlay? She’s very skittish around me.”
“No, it’s not you, Ethan. She’s just working through some things.”
“Is there any way I can help?”
I shake my head and look to where Finlay and Mrs. Jackson disappeared into the trees.
“No. I think your mom can.”
He nods but doesn’t look happy with my answer.
“It’s not you, Ethan. She’s uncomfortable around men. Don’t take it personally.”
He tilts his head as if what I just said made him realize something.
Dad walks out the back door, calling, “There’s my baby-girl.”
“Dad!” I run to him and jump in his arms. I throw my arms around his neck and hug him tightly. “I’ve missed you so much.”
“I missed you too,” he whispers. He pulls back and his eyes caress my face lovingly. “Every time I see you, you’re looking more like your mother.”
“Oh, Dad,” I whisper, hugging him again. I might never have known my mother but I see the love they share in Dad’s eyes, and it makes me feel like I’m a part of something special.
“Let me introduce you,” I say as I turn back to Ethan. “This is Ethan, Eli’s brother.”
Ethan reaches a hand out to Dad and they shake. “It’s a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Drake.”
“Likewise, call me Matthew.”
Dad’s always been like that. He doesn’t like being formal around people.
Eli and Mr. Jackson come outside and I turn to them while I keep my arm around Dad’s waist.
“Dad, have you met Mr. Jackson?”
“Yes, Eli introduced us when I got here.”
We all sit down and Eli looks around. “Have you seen Mom?” he asks Ethan.
“She took a walk with Finlay.”
“How is Finlay?” Dad asks.
I swallow hard and when I take too long to answer, Eli says, “She and Quinn started working at the gym. Did Quinn tell you?”
“Yes,” Dad says, looking at me for a second longer before he looks to Eli, then Ethan. “Quinn told me you helped them get the work. Thank you.”
“Only a pleasure,” Ethan says. His eyes keep searching the lining of trees for Finlay and Mrs. Jackson.
“How’s the trucking business,” Mr. Jackson asks, and it thankfully sends the conversation in a new direction.
When I get up and go to the kitchen, I hear Dad excuse himself.
I take more beers and water from the fridge.
“You didn’t answer me when I asked about Finlay,” he says.
Before I can even try to explain to Dad, Finlay comes running into the kitchen.
“Uncle Matt,” she cries and runs straight into his arms.
Dad’s worried eyes meet mine as she breaks down in his embrace.
“I should’ve listened to you,” she cries. “I should’ve come with you after the funeral.”
Uncle Ben died of a heart attack right after Finlay finished school. I remember when we went up for the funeral and Dad asked Finlay to come home with us. She didn’t want to leave her mom alone. Aunt Norah is in a home for people suffering from Alzheimer's. Dad offered to find a place close to us and to have her transferred, but Finlay didn’t want to.
Dad pulls away from Finlay and whit his arm around her, he ushers out of the kitchen.
I know Dad always checked in on her whenever he was up north. Maybe she’ll open up to him.
I take the beers and water outside and sit down next to Mrs. Jackson. I reach for her hand, and hold it, just needing to feel her strength for a little while.
The men are busy talking about the self-defense classes that Ethan is giving at the gym.
“You know half the women join that class just to see you, right?” Eli teases him.
Ethan looks irritated. “There’s one in particular. She’s driving me up the wall.”
“Yeah, that’s my baby brother. Breaking hearts wherever he goes.”
“Shut up,” Ethan snaps, but a smile pulls at his lips.
After that, the air is lighter.
The rest of the day goes by calmly and I’m not surprised when Finlay leaves with Dad.
Mrs. Jackson helps me clean up and while we’re washing the dishes she says, “She’ll be fine, Quinn. You need to be the strong one now.”
“I know,” I say as I dry off a plate. “It’s frustrating. I wish I could help her.”
“She needs time. Only time can help her. There is nothing anyone can do to make the pain go away.”
I always feel better when I get to talk with Mrs. Jackson.
“You’re an amazing mom,” I whisper.
She leaves the dishes and comes over to me, drying her hands on the cloth I’m holding.
“You’re an amazing daughter,” she says, her eyes filled with nothing but love.
I swallow back the adoration that’s threatening to make me cry.
“Don’t you think it’s time you just call me Mom?”
A huge smile spreads across my face.
“I live you, Mom,” I whisper. So much for keeping back the tears.
She hugs me to her and whispers, “I live you. Now and forever.”
It starts to rain just before everyone gets ready to leave. We walk them outside and wave as they all drive away.
We stand outside a little longer just staring at the rain. It smells wonderful.
In a moment of playfulness, I grab Eli’s hand and I pull him off the porch until we’re out in the open. I look up and let the water splash on my face. I’ve always loved the rain.
When I look at Eli I find his eyes on me. There’s a soft smile playing around his mouth.
I stand on my toes and press a kiss to his lips.
“Thank you for today,” I whisper.
“You’re welcome,” he says.
He takes my hand and we walk back into the house. Eli locks the door and pulls me up the stairs. Our clothes are soaked and we’re leaving puddles of water all over the place.
He pulls me into the bathroom and opens the faucets. When he turns back to me and I see the heated look in his eyes, warmth curls through my body.
He leans forward and presses a kiss to my neck. He pushes me under the warm spray of water and follows in behind me. His hands settle on my waist and he pulls my hips back against him until I feel his hardness pressing against me.
Eli’s left hand comes around my chest and he cups my breast through my wet shirt. I let my head fall back against his chest and groan.
He turns me around, and my back hits the wall. Water sprays down on us, making the moment feel wet and wild.
His mouth crushes mine and he kisses me hard, his tongue thrusting into my mouth. He brings his hands to my face and he frames my jaw, angling my head so the kiss can be deeper.
His mouth devours mine and I have to grab hold of his shoulders to keep myself up.
He yanks his shirt over his head, looking just as desperate for our bodies to be skin on skin, as I’m feeling.
Water runs down his face, chest, and arms, making him look as sexy as hell.
I lean forward and lick a drop off his chest and it makes a choked sound rise in his chest.
I trail my hands down his chest, dragging my fingernails over his skin until I reach the V I’m growing addicted to touching.
He nudges my face back up to his, and whispers, “I’ll never get enough of you, Quinn.”
His hands slide down my sides and he pulls my shirt over my head. It falls with a wet slap at our feet. His hands grab hold of my ass and his fingers splay over the swells.
He yanks me hard against him and just feeling his power turns me on to the point of almost going up in flames.
He kisses me again, his tongue dancing and flicking against mine. He moves his hand up my back, and when he unsnaps my bra, it reminds me to ask, “How did you get so good at doing that?”
His mouth crushes mine in answer, and feeling his bare chest against my breast makes me groan.
He takes hold of my wrist and pins it to the wall above my head.
This is new. I like where this is going.
“It doesn’t matter. All that matters is us, right here, right now,” he growls.
His right leg pushes between mine, and when I feel the pressure of his thigh between my legs, I almost shamelessly rub myself against him.
He presses his forehead against mine, and whispers, “It’s all that will ever matter,”
He lets go of my wrists and turning off the shower, he pulls me out of the bathroom. He pushes me onto the bed, not caring that we’re wet. When he prowls over me my legs fall open to the sides. He stops to lick my wet skin under my breasts. I grab hold of his shoulders, needing to touch him.
His tongue worked miracles over my sensitive skin, paying attention to my stomach and ribs before his mouth closed over my breast.
Suddenly, he moves off the bed and I’m just about to groan with frustration when his hands go to his jeans. I watch him strip out of them and quickly push my shorts and panties down. I kick them away and this time when he crawls over me, he takes hold of my legs and pushes them wide open. I don’t have time to feel anxious as his shoulders press against my thighs and he starts to kiss me down there.
Just like before, I fall back and cover my face with my hands.
He stops performing miracles with his tongue between my legs, and growls, “I want your eyes on me.”
Quickly, I drop my hands to my sides and my face burns up at the sight of him inches away from my entrance. When he starts to nibble and lick at me against my mouth drops open and the air rushes from my lungs.
“Please,” I groan, wanting so much more.
His breath fans over my stomach as he crawls up my body and unlike before he enters me in one hard thrust that makes my back bow off the bed and a cry tears from my lips.
His mouth slams into mine as if he wants to devour my cry.
His right hand slides down to my left leg and his fingers curls behind my knee. He pulls my leg over his hip.
He pulls out to the very tip before thrusting back in and this time the delicious feeling in my abdomen is so intense that I swear my body forgets how to function.
I’ve never been so consumed by another person before. Eli has a way that makes me forget about everything, forcing me to focus only on him and what’s happening between us.
It makes me feel brave and I push at his chest until he rolls onto his back and I can straddle him. I sink down on him and let my head fall back. Damn, it feels so much deeper like this.
A chocked groan escapes Eli and he grabs hold of my hips.
When I look at him is see a mixture of lust and love swirling in his eyes.
“You’re fucking irresistible,” he says, his voice hoarse.
It sends ripples of desire racing over my skin. I position my legs close to his sides and lift myself up. When I sink back down on him, his fingers dig into my skin.
He lets me have control only for a few seconds before he takes over setting the pace. He thrusts up as I sink down again and it makes a groan escape on a breath.
He chances the rhythm from slow to hard and fast, and the sound of our skin slapping fills the air around us, wrapping us in a cocoon of ecstasy.
Shivers race over my skin and goose bumps breaks out over every inch of my body as a string of fireworks crackle through my body.
His thrusts become harder and uneven and then his body arcs up against mine as he comes undone. I lean forward and kiss him, wanting to taste him while he fills me. His arms fold around me and he holds me as he kisses me tenderly.