Chapter 24
Taking a sip of his wine, he began to speak and Rian sat motionless, his own glass forgotten, as he listened attentively, immersing himself in the details of Catherine’s life. The mundane information, family names, dates of birth etc. did not deviate from Stuart Collins’ report, but Edward was able to richly embellish such facts with intimate anecdotes, filling in the details of Catherine’s history.
Rian listened to how Catherine’s mother had died in childbirth, which in turn led to her father’s breakdown. The excessive drinking and gambling had been his way of coping with tragedy. He also heard how devoted Catherine had been to her father, and he felt a strange mix of anger peppered with sadness as poor decision making accelerated the rapid decline of the family fortune. And finally, he learned how William Davenport had lost his own life. All of this being told by someone who’d known Catherine from the time she was a little girl. Who had played with her as a child. Who knew what made her laugh and what made her cry. Who probably stole a kiss from her when he himself was no more than a boy.
And with each new revelation, Rian felt the invisible cord that connected him to Catherine strengthen.
“I still feel terribly guilty about her father’s death,” Edward said morosely.
“You can’t possibly take responsibility for the horse stumbling in a rabbit hole,” Rian consoled.
“No, but it was my birthday, and I practically twisted my father’s arm so he would invite them.” He paused, sounding sad and lost in the memory. “It had been so long since I had seen Cat and, well, truth be told, I missed her.”
“But you did get to see her that day?” Rian asked softly.
“Oh yes.” He brightened considerably. “I’d been away for almost two years, but there was no mistaking Cat. She was so easy to be around. She made me feel as if we had only parted company the day before.” His voice dropped. “I still remember how beautiful she looked.”
The wistful tone caused the sharp claws of jealousy to pierce Rian’s chest. Unable to help himself he asked the obvious question. “Were you in love with her?”
“Love? I don’t know. Perhaps.” Edward gave him a strange look. “I did care about Cat, and I still do. I thought we might make a good match.”
“You never told her this?”
The bright red head moved in denial before Edward got up, retrieved the decanter, and refilled both their glasses. “No, but even if I had it would have changed nothing.”
“Why ever not?” Rian hated himself for wanting to know. It should have been enough that this man-child before him had not possessed the courage to declare his feelings. If he had, Catherine surely would never have left here, and would have been spared a horrifying assault.
And she would never have come into my life.
“There were…objections,” Edward said glumly as he sat down again.
“Your father?”
“Lord no. Papa adored Cat! Gave her his best horse to ride that day, and if you knew my father, you would have understood the significance of that particular gesture.” He shook his head, saying, “I don’t know how it is in your family, Mr. Connor, but in mine the fairer sex have always wielded the power in matters of matrimony. My mother has very strong opinions regarding such matters. She believes advantageous alliances are paramount in strengthening a family. I am quite convinced that in a previous life she must have been a very cunning royal advisor.”
Understanding rushed over Rian. “And there was no advantage to be had by joining with your neighbor?”
The younger man eyed him speculatively. “It would have made me happy, and I think Cat also, but in some families that consideration bears little influence.” Edward Barclay sighed. “In all fairness, I don’t think my mother ever seriously considered Cat as a wife, but if she had, she would have dismissed her as being unsuitable.”
“Due to the lack of fortune?”
He shook his head. “No, it was William’s behavior that put an end to any chance of a betrothal. Mama would not have cared how poor he was if he had lost his fortune honestly. She simply could not forgive him his vices. The gambling, the whoring, his drunkenness.”
“So Catherine had to pay the price for her father’s weakness,” Rian said bitterly.
“So it would seem, and I cannot tell you how sorry I am for that. I was not in a position to challenge my mother, and, well, it was just the way it was.” He shrugged in defeat.
If you truly loved Catherine, you would have fought for her no matter what your mother said. If you had loved her then, if you loved her still.
“Do you know what happened after her father died?”
Edward shook his head. “That day was awful. As Cat was returning home with her father’s body, we received word my paternal grandfather had himself passed away. We had to leave at once, and then, while we were gone, my Father took ill and also died.” Edward looked decidedly gloomy and Rian couldn’t really blame him. It was a hell of a way to remember your birthday. “By the time Mama and I returned,” he continued, “The Hall was empty and Cat was gone.”
“Don’t you think it strange that no one knew where she was?” Rian asked. Edward Barclay might have many fine qualities, but his apparent inability to stand up to his mother, to allow her to rule his life, grated on Rian.
Picking up on the irritation in Rian’s voice, Edward threw him an odd look. “I don’t think I ever said that no one knew. Jacob Whitney knew. He was the Davenport’s legal advisor,” he added, anticipating the next question.
“And did you ask him where she had gone?”
“Of course I did.” Now it was Edward’s turn to sound irritable. “Especially as my circumstances had now changed.”
“Changed?” Although Rian thought he understood the younger man’s meaning, he wanted the clarification.
“Yes. With my father’s passing, I inherited not just wealth, but his title also.”
“And as the new Lord Barclay, you would be able to offer Catherine marriage,” Rian finished for him.
“Exactly, and that was my intention, but as I said, she had already gone.”
“The lawyer could not assist you?”
“He could not,” Edward said firmly. “Mr. Whitney informed me that Cat had made him swear to secrecy regarding her situation. She wanted to be able to start life anew with no shadow of her past to follow her.”
“Surely you didn’t just leave it at that?”
Again the odd look. “No, Mr. Connor, I did not,” Edward said slowly. “I wrote a letter explaining the recent tragedies that had occurred, and the subsequent change in my circumstances as a result. I prevailed upon Mr. Whitney to send the letter on my behalf, assuring him that he would not break any confidence by doing so.” He gave a wry smile. “Your coming here, however, has answered a question that has haunted me since then.”
“What question would that be?”
“Why I received no reply.”
For a few moments there was silence between the two men, broken only by the soft huffing sound made by one of the dogs chasing rabbits in his sleep. Rian saw that the young man sitting opposite him had been hampered by his own peculiar code of honor. Believing he had done all he could in his pursuit of Catherine, it never occurred to him that his letter might not have reached its destination. The lawyer had assured him it had been sent, and that was all Edward needed to know.
I would never give up so easily, Rian thought.
“Perhaps if I spoke to the lawyer—what was his name?” Rian frowned as he searched his memory. “Whitney, was it?”
Edward nodded.
“Maybe if I spoke with him and explained the circumstances, he might be willing to tell me where Catherine was headed.”
“It will be a rather one-sided conversation. The poor man recently suffered a stroke. It has left him quite unable to speak or move, I’m afraid.”
Rian felt the ground being sucked from beneath him. “When did this happen?” he asked.
“Just recently as a matter of fact.” Edward frowned and stared at the ceiling. “A week ago, if memory serves.”
“Under what circumstances?”
“I understand he was in his offices when a fire broke out. Burned the building to the ground,” Edward said gravely. “Nothing left at all. Jacob was lucky to escape with his life.”
Burned to the ground along with any records or legal documents regarding Catherine and her family.
For a few moments nothing more was said. Edward stared into the fire and Rian began to process what he had been told. He looked at the young man sitting across from him. “I suppose it was providence that you had already purchased The Hall,” he stated softly.
“What makes you think—” Edward shook his head. “Was it that obvious?”
“Lucky guess on my part,” Rian told him.
“Well, all in all, I suppose it was.”
“What compelled you to do such a thing?”
“Call it an act of rebellion to spite my mother.” He made a sound that could have been a bitter laugh, making Rian think he had possibly underestimated the strength of Edward’s backbone. “Perhaps if Cat had known I was the buyer, she might not have left.”
“She never knew?”
Edward looked miserable. “I wanted to surprise her, so I acted through a third party. My agent instructed Jacob Whitney my wish to meet with the previous owner, on the pretext of discussing some changes I wanted to make to the house. Mr. Whitney told me afterwards that my good intentions did not have the desired effect. I merely hastened Cat’s departure.”
“Surely the man could have found a way to let her know without actually telling her?”
“I am certain he would have, Mr. Connor, if he himself had known I was the buyer.”
The silence returned as each man contemplated the twists and turns of fate.
“And what are your feelings toward Catherine now?” Rian asked softly, finally breaking the silence between them. He had to know.
For a few moments Edward said nothing and Rian hoped that his own expression was sufficiently composed to hide his desire.
“I love Cat, Mr. Connor, and part of me always will, but I have to tell you that when I spoke of offering marriage before, it was with the intention of our betrothal taking place quickly.”
“Before objections could be raised?” Rian asked quietly.
Edward nodded and looked somewhat embarrassed. “I’m a coward, Mr. Connor, I admit it, and my mother is a very formidable woman.”
“So you are no longer in a position to offer Catherine marriage?”
“No. I am not.” He refused to look at Rian, keeping his eyes fixed instead on the sleeping dog at his feet. “Had I known where she was…”
It would not have made any difference. You still would not have found the courage to defy your formidable mama.
“You are now spoken for?” Rian guessed. He found it difficult to be kind when a part of him wanted to reach out and box the young lord soundly about the ears. No matter his wealth, he would never be worthy of Catherine.
The bright red head bobbed a couple of times as Edward answered his question.
“And your Mother approves of the young lady?”
“Of course. Wilhelmina is her choice,” Edward told him, glancing up quickly before returning his attention to the sleeping dog. “She comes from good stock.”
“I’m sure she does,” Rian agreed, unsure whether Edward was referring to his betrothed or the dog at his feet.
He stared at the boy sitting opposite him. He couldn’t think of him as a man, no matter how prestigious his title. He was still a boy who was ruled by his mother, and Rian knew that if he hadn’t found the courage to stand up to her by now, he never would. He wondered if Catherine realized what a tyrant her almost-mother-in-law was, and if she would welcome her narrow escape. Or would she have been prepared to fight the forbidding matriarch in order to secure her marriage to Edward Barclay? It was a question that would remain forever unanswered.
“Would you be willing to sell The Hall to me?” Rian suddenly asked.
Edward whipped his head up and stared in astonishment. Rian was equally as dumbfounded.
“Why do you—” Edward broke off suddenly, and a defeated look appeared in his eyes as he acknowledged the presence of a better man. “Does she know?” he asked.
“Know what?” Rian asked with a frown wrinkling his brow.
“Why that you love her,” Edward stated in surprise.
“Am I that obvious?”
“Lucky guess on my part.”
“In answer, no. At least I don’t think so.”
“You’ve not told her then?”
“Not in so many words. The situation between us has become… complicated.”
Edward frowned. “In what way?”
“A misunderstanding regarding a woman I was previously involved with.” Rian was astounded to hear the words come out of his mouth, and wondered why he felt obliged to reveal such a detail to the young man before him.
“And is this woman still a complication?” Edward stated, genuinely curious.
“Not as far as I’m concerned.” Rian tipped the glass and finished the last of his wine.
“But Cat doesn’t know that, does she?” Rian shook his head. “Well, Mr. Connor, may I offer some advice?” The skeptical look on Rian’s face brought forth a hasty clarification. “Oh, not about women in general—I would never presume—but about Cat?” Accepting Rian’s shrug, Edward continued, “If the Catherine you know is still the same strong-willed girl that I grew up with, then you had best tell her your feelings as soon as possible.” He paused before adding, “And then be prepared.”
“Prepared for what?”
Edward’s expression returned him once more to an affable host. “Cat never does anything halfheartedly, Mr. Connor. If she returns your affection, and your presence here is a good indication you believe it a possibility, then I would imagine you are about to enjoy an experience few men can boast of.” Edward’s smile, though warm and genuine, did not dispel the shadow that lingered in his eyes. The shadow that said if only I had been braver, if only I had been stronger, if only I loved her the way you do. “You’re going to be a very lucky man, Mr. Connor.” Edward said as he raised his glass and tipped it toward him. “I envy you.”