What a strange, emotional day. Simon was glad to have the night to himself. The apartment was quiet; the sound of his keys landing in the tray by the door was surprisingly loud. Karl was out with his friend Burns, and knowing them, they’d probably be out arguing about politics or sports or something for the rest of the night.

Simon sank onto his couch. Work had crawled by. He had spent the whole day thinking about Evan.

This news about his son—his son!—had put the brakes on making any big confessions of wanting to date him. Not that Simon wouldn’t date a guy with a kid. It wasn’t that. But Evan had enough on his plate right now. He didn’t need the burden of Mr. Serious Simon coming after him too.

Evan. With a kid. Who in the world would have guessed?

Simon wondered what it must be like. Not all the secrecy and family drama part, but what was it like, to know that there was a little version of you running around, playing with dinosaurs and singing songs?

He’d never really pictured himself with kids. Hell, he could barely picture himself on a date, let alone settling down long enough with someone to have kids. But Evan had gone and done it, fathering a child with his best friend.

So weird.

His thoughts, and the silence, were interrupted by the doorbell. Puzzling. Who would be visiting this time of night? If it had been one of the guys, they would’ve texted first. For a minute he thought about just letting the person ring for a while, ignoring them until they went away. He really did need some alone time to think. Some time to compartmentalize, to set aside his attraction to Evan, because clearly Evan’s life was complicated enough right now without him.

The bell was insistent though, and so he pushed himself off the couch and answered the door.

“There’s a cab waiting for us downstairs,” said Evan, brandishing a bottle of wine. “Are you dressed? Yeah, you’re dressed. Come on.”

“What? Where are you going? Are you drunk?”

“Um, in reverse order: Not yet, but I’m working on it. Dinner, with you. And because I owe you for today, and yesterday, and all of it. I owe you for your silence. It’s like we’re gangsters. The code of omerta! Come on, and grab a coat, it’s cold out there.”

* * *

“When we met, I was surprised that you didn’t already know who I was,” said Simon, lifting his wineglass.

They’d gone all the way up to the city for dinner, after Evan had insisted there was nowhere to eat in town. (Nowhere worthy of us, at least, he’d said.)

“I know,” said Evan. His soup had been pushed aside, half-eaten. “I think it’s different for my cousins. They’ve lived in Cray Quarry their whole lives. Archie never shipped them off to school. When I’m down there, it feels like everybody’s a stranger, other than Maura. I’m not totally out of the loop, though. I know there was some friction when my dad hired you. I heard some of that.”

“It was like coming to work in a meat locker, everybody was so cold. At first I couldn’t understand it…until I realized how much everybody at the company worshiped Ash and Callum. They were the golden boys, same as in high school.”

“So what’s the big secret?”

“God, it seems so weird to tell someone this story, because it can’t possibly matter to someone who wasn’t there, but…

“Everybody in Cray Quarry knows about the Cray-Phelps feud. Two wealthy farming families, each vying for control of the town. But by the time we were born, the feud was finally dying down. The Crays had turned to mining, then to electricity, while the Phelps kept up the farming tradition.”

“This is like the beginning of every story Uncle Archie tells,” said Evan.

“But fifteen years ago, it was all over except for the ill-will. There was some shoving and name-calling, but otherwise the most peaceful this town had been in ages. Until the fight between Lucas and Ash.

“Lucas was one of my best friends. It was weird, having a rich friend, but he’s pretty down to earth, so he fit right in with the rest of the guys. He’d hang out all the time with me, my brother, Rex and Pete. Until he stopped, and suddenly we never saw him, and he never came around. We all knew what that meant: He’d met a guy.

“What we didn’t know at the time was that he was seeing Ash’s boyfriend, but the reason we didn’t realize it, is that nobody knew at the time Ash even had a boyfriend. It was a big secret, hush-hush. It didn’t stay secret for long. Pretty soon everybody knew Lucas had stolen Ash’s boyfriend.

“It was enough to restart the feud all over again. Ancient animosities were stoked; ancient alliances were called back into being. Everybody at school took sides. Naturally, since we were friends with Lucas, we took the anti-Cray position.”

“But of course. I probably would have, myself.”

“The thing is, Ash wasn’t going to let it go without a fight, and we all know the Crays fight dirty.”

“Hey!”

“It could’ve been settled with a fist-fight out in the highschool parking lot, but no. That would be too open. Too much risk of Ash losing, of public shame. So Ash and Callum dragged Lucas out to the quarry for a beating. Out there, middle of nowhere, they were going to punch and kick him until he agreed never to even look at Ash’s boyfriend again.”

“That does sound like my cousins, yes.”

“But what you’ve got to understand is, even though the quarry was Cray property, all of us had been going there for years. We’d all grown up swimming in the lakes, biking around the hills, fleeing whenever we’d see the Cray Mining men in those yellow vests and hard-hats. We knew that territory, probably better than Ash and Callum themselves. So when I heard what was going down, I got the guys, and we rode straight to the quarry.

“It was in March, just before spring started warming things up, and we were getting one of those thunderstorms, so the sky was dark and ominous…perfect for our purpose, but chilly, the way your knuckles would go numb as you rode your bike. When we got to the quarry, it was late afternoon, and we were already starting to lose the light. We heard the shouting and headed straight for it, taking up a position a few yards away.

“Ash and Callum hadn’t heard us. They were too busy taunting Lucas. Not too much damage had been done yet, but Lucas was clearly scared. Scared but defiant. Come on, you assholes! he shouted at them. Do your worst, you know Ricky likes me better than you!

“If there’s one thing the quarry always had in large supply, it was rocks. The gang armed itself. Even my little brother Karl got his pockets full of sharp stones. We were behind a boulder, staring, waiting for just the right moment. Then, right as Ash was lifting his fist to come down on Lucas, we charged.

“It was glorious, Evan! We were screaming like banshees, hurling rocks, pelting Ash and Callum. They never saw us coming. Had their hands up, crying out, trying to ward off the onslaught. We fought like warriors to defend our friend. Pete managed to get Lucas to his feet, and he joined the battle. When we were out of rocks, we used our fists. We might’ve been smaller than Ash and Callum, we might not have been big weightlifting football stars, but we had right on our side.

“We normally stop the story there. We defended Lucas, we beat the Crays, and everyone went home, bruised but a little wiser.”

Evan raised an eyebrow. “You normally stop the story there?”

“Well, there was one other thing. A final blow, as it were. We were all out of breath, all realizing we’d won. Pete and Rex were doing a victory dance, laughing and hooting at the Crays. Then Callum aimed one good punch, right at Rex’s chest.

“We all watched in horror as Rex lost his footing and fell straight into the quarry lake.

“That time of year, the water was cold. It felt like we were watching in slow motion. Rex gasped, and sank beneath the still water.

“The fight had taken us into early evening, and it was already getting dark thanks to the thunderclouds. We all knew how deep that water was. How little chance Rex had.

“I was trying to think about the best way to save him. Looking around for a long branch, so we could get to the edge of the water, hold it out to him, something for him to grab onto. Trying to think of the right way to do it.

“My brother Karl didn’t hesitate. He’d always been the brash one in the family. Didn’t even bother stripping down, he just went straight into the water after Rex. Kicking himself deeper and deeper down, into the blackness, as lightning and thunder and sweeping wind surrounded us.

“I was terrified. I was right there at the edge, holding the big branch, trying to see into the water, see where my brother had gone. What if he dies, I thought, thinking of our mom and dad, how they’d be crushed. It was like my whole life flashed before my eyes, as I tried to find them.

“Then up they came. Rex, under Karl’s arm, and we were all shouting and holding out our hands and helping them up.

“Ash and Callum made themselves scarce, of course. The fight was over, and they didn’t want to be part of whatever happened next. We ended up having to get an ambulance. Rex spent the night in the hospital. They said another sixty seconds in that water would have killed him. We were all grounded for weeks after that. What did you think you were doing down there, in this weather? That was the general consensus of the parents.

“But we were kids, you know, and kids get back to normal pretty quickly. Before long, it was spring, and we were all hanging out again, and we’d turned what happened into The Battle of Cray Quarry. The story would get more and more embellished, the more we told it, until we might as well have been fighting with swords out there.

“The thing is, though…I don’t think any of us were ever quite the same after that. I don’t want to say the story had no happy ending. For the most part, we just got on with our lives. But each of us had changed a little, right? I was so used to my spot as Older Brother, the guy who always knew what to do to get us out of trouble, the guy who knew the responsible thing to do…but I’d just stood there looking for a stick, while my brother did the saving.”

Evan shook his head. “Dude, you can’t blame yourself. It was an emergency—”

“Yeah. It was an emergency, and if I’d been the only one there, Rex would’ve died. I mean, I’m not going to get all maudlin about it, but it’s just the fact. I failed to save my friend.”

“I’m not putting down your brother or anything, but seriously, Simon, jumping into water that cold, there could have been two dead guys. It was an insane risk. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Simon went quiet for a moment, twirling his spoon through his soup, staring down, lost in memory. “It’s hard to explain, I guess. But it should have been me. I should have risked everything to save him. And anyone can disagree with that, but it should have been me. I should have quit being Safe Responsible Simon and been brave enough to risk it. Oh, well. It’s all in the past now, isn’t it? We’re all still friends, we hang out all the time. That’s a happy enough ending to the story, I guess?”

“What amazes me is that Ash and Callum still hold enough of a grudge, to make trouble for you.”

“Oh, yeah. I sometimes think your dad only hired me because of what happened down by the quarry. I’m sure he knew about it, and he knew who I was, when I applied for the job. I think it amused him, that I’d struck a blow against the Fabulous Cray Brothers.”

* * *

The evening had gotten crisp and chilly. The darkness in the city was different than that back home, punctuated by bright points from streetlights and store windows, the eerie glow of the skyscrapers. They were walking over the footbridge in the park, and below, the pond had gone black, reflecting the clear night sky.

Simon had never felt closer to Evan than he did right now. He’d told the story of the great battle, and Evan hadn’t laughed at how seriously Simon and his friends took it. Nor had he thought Simon was wrong in his hesitation to save Rex.

It was a strange feeling.

“I’m glad I came out with you,” he said to Evan.

“Not like you had a choice. I would’ve dragged you out of that apartment. There has been too much damn tension in the air, man. We just need a damn break from my family and all the shit they do.”

Simon nodded. Then he swallowed nervously. Now is the time to tell him. What better chance was he going to have, to tell Evan how he felt? The night was beautiful, they were walking together in the quiet, and nothing could interrupt them now. No phone calls, no job, no prying eyes.

“Evan,” he said.

“That’s me.”

“I have something I want to say to you.”

Evan looked at him, a question in his eyes. “Go for it.”

“I’m trying to be brave right now. I keep trying, I keep thinking I can tell you this, but then other things get in the way, but I don’t want to just blurt it out, because it’s important, and I don’t want to screw it up.”

Evan stopped. “Is everything okay?”

“You know how we keep talking about boundaries and stuff?”

“Uh-oh.”

“No, no, not uh-oh. Kind of the opposite. Maybe. Oh, I don’t know how to say it. I like you, Evan. I mean, obviously I’m physically attracted to you, we already knew that. But…I like you. You’re interesting, you’re complicated, you care about things.”

Evan peered at Simon. “Really?”

“Did I say the wrong thing?”

“No, not at all…at first I thought you were going to friendzone me, and I was going to be so upset. Nice and respectful, but upset nonetheless. Of course I like you too, Simon. Isn’t that obvious? I was only holding back because of all this stuff with my family, all these restrictions.”

It felt like Simon’s heart was expanding, this warm feeling in his chest growing, starting to suffuse his entire body, making him light and ready to float off the ground. “It’s just, I think you’re kind of too good for me?” said Simon.

“Me?”

“You’re rich, you’re gorgeous, you know all these famous people, you’ve been all over the world. I’m just like this little office-mouse who peeks out from a hole in the wall.”

Evan grabbed Simon by the upper arms and pulled him close. “Don’t ever say that about yourself. Don’t ever think you don’t deserve things. I didn’t fly around the world because I’m some great guy, I just lucked into having a rich dad who was too busy inventing to care what trouble I got into. You’re not some meek little mouse, Simon. You…oh, god, I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind for one second since that night in the club.”

Then Evan kissed him.

That feeling of being lighter than air was so strong, he needed Evan to hold on tight, so Simon didn’t simply float away. All the tension that had been weighing him down, all the fear and confusion, these things that had been like heavy rocks making his footstep slow and his muscles ache, they all fell to the ground, with the power of Evan’s kiss.

Simon returned it. He put a hand on the base of Evan’s neck, felt the warm flesh beneath the scarf, pulled himself forward, kissed him more deeply.

I have never felt like this.

The night at the club, it might have been a million years ago, but that sense of urgency and desperation had returned. That feeling that he had to get close to Evan now, had to have him immediately, was overwhelming.

The footbridge led to a line of trees in the park. There was no one around. Be brave, Simon. He pulled Evan behind one of the trees. Pushed him until he was pressed against the bark. A cold wind was biting, but Simon didn’t care. He kissed Evan’s stubbled jaw, his clean throat, pulling open the scarf and the collar to get at the tanned skin beneath.

If there had been time, if it hadn’t been so cold, he would have unbuttoned Evan’s shirt, run his hands over that muscular chest, sucked on Evan’s nipples. But there was no time for foreplay, and the urgency was too great. Simon sank to his knees.

Evan, already hard, his cock clearly outlined through his pants, threw his head back at Simon’s ministrations. Simon heard his heavy breath, his anticipation. He unzipped Evan, and pulled out his heavy cock and his thick, full balls.

In this night air, Evan’s cock was the only heat. Simon put his lips against it, feeling the warmth. He tasted it, ran his tongue beneath the head, drawing it up to the slit, tasting the salt and stickiness of Evan’s juice.

There would be time for long, romantic, leisurely fucks later. Right now, all he wanted in the world was to show Evan what he meant to him. Right now, it was time to make Evan come.

Simon put one hand around Evan’s base, jacking him swiftly; his other hand slid beneath Evan’s sack, feeling the warm, heavy balls twisting and turning, lining themselves up for what was to come.

He sucked Evan’s cock into his mouth, as much as he could get. It was thick, thicker than Simon’s, and if it had not been for this raging lust Simon felt, it might have been daunting. But this was Brave Simon, and he was not afraid of sucking on a giant cock. Not even here in public, the great expanse of the city park, where anyone might walk by at any moment. If anything, the danger of it drove him forward.

Evan gasped. His hips seemed to move of their own volition, and he reached down to hold Simon’s head, as though to shove himself even deeper into Simon’s mouth.

Simon allowed it. He didn’t care. Let Evan control him, let Evan plunge as deep as he possibly could into Simon’s mouth. He wanted it. He wanted every inch of Evan. If he could have sucked him and been fucked by him at the same time, he would’ve.

With a groan that spoke of long-pent-up desire, Evan shoved himself forward, deep into Simon, leaving Simon no choice but to swallow and hold his breath. He knew the instant Evan came; he could feel it with his hand holding Evan’s balls, the way they drew up to deliver the load, and the way his cock swelled, and the intensity of that last push.

Simon was brave, but he couldn’t physically keep up with that hard a thrust; he pulled his head back, and was greeted with a shot of cum directly onto his face. Before he could get his mouth back on Evan’s cock, it splashed him again, covering his chin. It made them both laugh, but when Simon began more slowly sucking the cum out of Evan, there was no more laughter, just a vulnerable moan that seemed to hang in the air.

Evan collapsed back, leaning against the tree. “Oh god,” he said. “Simon. Oh. Wow.”

He reached down and pulled Simon to his feet. Their lips met again.

“Never wash your face,” whispered Evan, and Simon laughed quietly, licking his tongue down to reach what he could of his chin.

Simon wasn’t sure how long they stood like that, alone in the park, in each other’s arms. It might have been forever.