Kane

The rink has always been the place where I could clear my head. Game. Practice. Doesn’t matter. Just putting the gear on, the sound of metal against ice, the smell of leather and sweat, the feel of the stick in my hands; it’s an adrenaline rush. A place to channel my aggression. And today, I have a lot of fucking aggression.

Coach has us working on a two-v-two drill that has me and Austin pitted against Sebastian and one of the newest additions to the team, Tyler Slade. Usually, I can outskate both of them, but today my feet feel like they have concrete blocks rather than skates attached to them.

Tyler gives me a little bump from behind, before maneuvering around me and taking the puck away. Using all of my two-hundred-and-twenty pounds, I check him into the boards, and he drops - hard.

“What the hell?” Tyler is up quickly, gloves fisted in my jersey.

I push him back. “Lay off, asshole. It was a clean shot.”

The man mumbles something under his breath and drops his hands. I should let it go. Usually, I would. But I’m itching for a fight.

When he starts to turn, I give him a swift uppercut to the jaw, not hard enough to do any real injury, but enough to cause a reaction.

And I get one.

His gloves come off and his fist connects with my face, a blow that’s going to do some damage. But it feels good. It feels fucking great.

My own gloves come off, and I get a few good shots in of my own, before the guys are pulling me off him.

Blake and Sebastian hold me back, Coach is screaming, and Tyler is bleeding all over the damn ice. But the only thing I can think about is Brynne - and the kid.

“Get off me.” I shrug away from Blake and Sebastian.

“Madden,” Coach has fire in his eyes, and it’s aimed straight at me. “Get over here.”

I can’t deal with him. Not right now. My head is a mess. And every time I look at the man, I can’t help but play his words from the other night over and over in my head.

If you hear from her, you’ll let me know.

Jesus, what am I supposed to tell him? Yeah, I not only saw her, but also the grandkid she hasn’t told you about. Oh, and by the way, I’m the fucking father.

Ignoring Coach’s hollering, I skate off the ice.

I didn’t sleep last night. And I know I won’t until I see her again.

The initial shock has worn off, at least slightly, enough to know that I’m more than pissed at her. Fuck her reasons. The kid is as much mine as it is hers, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let her keep him from me.

The fact that she thought for even a second that I wouldn’t want to be part of his life only frustrates me more. Sure, the thought of having a kid never really crossed my mind. But I’ll be damned if I’m going to let my own son grow up the same way I did, not knowing who his father is.

In the change room, I tear my helmet off and toss it on the bench, before slamming my fist into the wall.

“Jesus, Madden.” Blake moves into the room, pulling off his goalie mask and dragging his fingers through his long, dark hair. Gray eyes watch me carefully, like he’s ready at any second for me to detonate. “What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing.” I sit down and start unlacing my skates.

Still in his heavy gear, he sits down on the bench across from me. “You going to tell me or am I going to have to beat it out of you?”

With my elbows on my knees, I place my head in my palms and mutter, “Brynne’s back.”

Silence.

I look up, expecting some response, but he’s just watching me with a you’re-asking-for-trouble look.

“Does Coach know?”

I shake my head. “I was at the cemetery yesterday. She was there…”

“You going to tell him you saw her?”

“I don’t know.” I scrub my fingers over my face. “I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do.”

More silence.

“You want to tell me what’s really going on?”

I exhale heavily, then mutter, “She’s got a kid.”

He frowns. “And that’s your problem, how?”

I hold his gaze, jaw clenched, waiting. I can see the moment he gets it. His eyes widen and his mouth drops open.

“Fuck. It’s yours? Jesus, Kane. You slept with her?” With every word, his voice gets louder.

“Keep your voice down.”

“Coach is going to have your balls when he finds out.”

“Right now, Coach is the least of my worries.” Pinching the back of my neck, I look up at the ceiling, then close my eyes. “She doesn’t want me having anything to do with him.” I huff out a bitter laugh. “I don’t think she’d even have told me if I hadn’t seen him.”

Blake exhales loudly. “That’s messed up, man.”

“Yeah.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. But I’m not letting her keep my kid from me.”

He winces, shaking his head. “I know you’ve had feelings for Brynne for a long time, but-”

“This has nothing to do with feelings. It has to do with responsibility.”

He grunts.

“What?”

“Just don’t let her fuck with your head. I care about the girl, too. But she’s always had her head stuck up her ass where you’re concerned. I don’t know why you don’t just tell her the damn truth.”

“You know why.”

“Bullshit reason, bro. You think it’s what Sam would have wanted? Her hating you because he was off his meds-”

“Don’t.”

With a shake of his head, he stands. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt…”

I hear the word he doesn’t say. Again.

“What? You think I should just forget about her, forget that she had my kid? ‘Cause there’s no way in hell I’m doing that.”

“That’s not what I meant.” He pushes his hair off his forehead before placing his goalie mask back on. “I’m just saying take it slow.”

I watch him leave, then mutter under my breath when he’s gone, “I’ve never done anything slow in my life, and I have no intention of starting now.”