Ryan went for a run in the morning. After receiving that text from Sadie last night, he needed something to keep her off his mind. He had gotten a hard-on that wouldn’t quit, and he refused to get himself off while thinking about her. She was his best friend’s little sister, and that meant she was off-limits.

His legs burned halfway through his run, and it helped keep his mind on exercise rather than Sadie. He didn’t want to think about her long brown hair that he could run his fingers through, or her light brown eyes that resembled the color of honey, and her naturally pink lips that were perfect for kissing.

With a groan, he pushed himself harder so he wouldn’t think about her. By the time he got back to his fraternity house, he was sweating and in pain. He would need a soak to soothe his muscles, but that was a luxury he didn’t have access to. A quick hot shower was enough, and he pulled on some shorts and a shirt.

Temptation had a hold of him as he reread Sadie’s text from last night. He was playing with fire when he typed a response.

Sleep well?

Ryan stared at his phone, waiting for a response until his stomach growled. He waited a few minutes more before his stomach overrode his dick. Tossing his phone onto his bed, he headed to the kitchen for some food.

After filling his stomach, he went back to his room and checked his phone.

Sadie: I had nightmares about Piaget and Freud.

Ryan snorted. That wasn’t a response he’d been expecting. He typed out a quick response.

Ryan: You’ll do fine on your midterm. Trust me :) You are well prepared.

It took seconds for him to get a reply.

Sadie: Thanks :) Want to come over to help me study some more?

His hard-on from last night came back with a vengeance. He awkwardly adjusted himself. Studying psychology was not an appropriate thing to be turned on by.

He was about to respond with some excuse to get out of it, but his fingers refused to cooperate.

Ryan: I thought you didn’t need any more help?

Sadie: I don’t, but I could use the company. Hannah’s going to be gone all day.

Ryan swore and took a deep breath. It wasn’t smart for him to be in an enclosed space with Sadie with a bedroom not too far away. He loved his best friend, Jake, and he really shouldn’t be interested in his sister. That was the perfect formula for an ass-kicking, and he liked his friendship with the both of them.

Ryan: Sorry, I’m busy. Maybe we can celebrate next weekend after you ace your exam.

He needed to get himself under control. When he found out that Sadie was coming to the same university, he was prepared to help her adjust to college life. He thought it would be fun to be her sort of mentor, but then they spent too much time together, and he remembered the tiny crush he had on her when they were in high school.

His phone alerted him to a new message.

Sadie: Too bad. I was going to buy you lunch.

“Be strong,” Ryan said to himself. “She’s just a friend.” His dick thought otherwise.

Ryan: You can buy me lunch next weekend :) he sent back.

Sadie: Deal!

Ryan smiled to himself. He had a whole week to get these forbidden thoughts out of his head.

Sadie sent him a text with a picture of herself pouting.

“Fuck,” he said. This was going to be harder than he thought.

* * *

A week of midterms was hell, no matter how long Ryan had been in college. By the time the weekend rolled around, he forgot that he and Sadie had plans. Apparently, she did too, since he didn’t hear a word from her until Sunday.

Sadie: Weren’t we supposed to hang out this weekend?

Ryan: Yeah, but my brain needed restoration via alcohol.

Sadie: Oh, can you bring me some?

Ryan: No, you’re not old enough to drink.

Sadie: But old enough for you stare at my ass.

Ryan: It’s a nice ass.

Ryan meant to delete it and write something else, but his finger accidentally hit the send button.

“Shit,” he said and tried to switch his phone to airplane mode before it went through. He checked the message and saw that it sent. With a sigh, he switched it back just as he got an incoming text from Sadie.

Sadie: Yes, it is. Too bad you’ll never see it.

He exhaled in relief but couldn’t resist messing with her one more time.

Ryan: I don’t need to see it to have fun.

Sadie: So are you coming over or not? I have pizza.

Apparently, she was going to ignore his flirty text.

Ryan: I’ll be right over.

Ryan was at her campus apartment in less than a half hour. Sadie opened the door with a grin on her face.

“Really? You ran over here at the mere mention of pizza?” she asked and let him inside.

“Well, the company’s not so bad either,” he said and sat on her couch. He peered into the pizza box on her coffee table.

Sadie brought over a paper plate for him and sat next to him. “How’d your midterms go?”

“I think hell would be more pleasant,” he said and stuffed a slice of pizza into his mouth.

“Same,” she said and picked up her half-eaten slice from her plate. “You know, alcohol goes great with pizza.”

“Not happening,” Ryan said without hesitation.

Sadie huffed irritably. “Still don’t want to help me out, huh?”

“We discussed this less than an hour ago,” Ryan pointed out. No matter how much she wanted alcohol, he was not going to be the one to give it to her. He was sure she could get it from someone else, but that was on them. His job was to keep her out of trouble where he could. Well, it wasn’t job but more like something he took upon himself. He would do his best to make sure nothing bad happened to her.

Sadie rested her head on his shoulder as they watched TV. “You’re no fun.”

He chuckled and patted her arm. “Drinking’s not all that fun anyway. The hunger, dehydration, and headaches make it a pain in the ass.”

Ryan shuddered just thinking about the one time he got the spins. He didn’t touch tequila for a year after that.

They lapsed into silence and watched the images play out on the screen. Sadie moved closer to him until her side was completely pressed against his. Her legs were folded underneath her, and her hair tickled Ryan’s collarbone.

He remained completely still, almost tensed up, every time she adjusted to get closer to him. He knew he was in trouble if she rested her face in the crook of his neck, and he prayed that she would eventually move away from him.

After all their flirting last weekend and this morning, Ryan couldn’t merely think of Sadie as Jake’s little sister anymore. She had grown into a woman before his eyes, and a brief glance at her reminded him how appealing her body was.

Sadie yawned, bringing Ryan out of his thoughts. She slid down on her couch and placed her head in his lap as she was watched the TV.

Without thinking, Ryan ran his hand through her hair, and Sadie hummed in satisfaction. While he was very uncomfortable with where her head was placed, he couldn’t deny the tranquility he felt whenever they relaxed like this. He could be himself around her, and vice versa. They knew each other too well to try and put on airs.

After a few minutes in this new position, Ryan had to say something.

“Sadie?” he said, and she looked up at him.

“Mind finding someplace else to lie your head?” he asked.

With a nod, she sat up and stretched. Her head went back to his shoulder, but her hand went to his thigh.

“Does it make you nervous when I touch you here?” she asked.

Ryan fought the urge shiver at her words. He never took her for being particularly bold in this area, but the last week proved him wrong.

“A little,” he replied with a hint of unease in his voice.

“Why? It’s not like you’re attracted to me or anything,” she said, and he stiffened instantly when she said that.

“Oh my god, Ryan. Are you?”

Ryan ignored her, but Sadie didn’t give up that easily. She brushed her lips against his cheek, and he held in a groan.

Why was she torturing him like this? Had this been her intention all along?

Her mouth drifted down to his neck, and he pulled away and looked at her.

“What are you doing?” he asked, but Sadie wasn’t looking at him.

Her eyes were gazing down at the bulge in his pants.

Ryan quickly covered himself with his hands, and Sadie gave him an amused look.

“Was that me from kissing you on the cheek?” she asked with a snort.

“No,” he lied. “It randomly happens at times. That’s how it works.”

She arched an eyebrow at him, and he swallowed pitifully. He wasn’t sure how long he would be able to deny his attraction for her. Not with the way she was looking at him.

To her credit, she removed her hand from his thigh.

“Fine then,” she said and went back to watching the show.

Ryan groaned low in his throat and forced himself to ask the obvious question. “What is it with you all of a sudden?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean,” he said with narrowed eyes. “The flirting, the touching, the kiss on my cheek. What was that about?”

Sadie shrugged, and it frustrated him even more.

Ryan took a deep breath and sighed. Anger wouldn’t work with her, so he needed a different approach.

“Sadie, come on, this isn’t you. We’ve known each other since we were kids, and I’m your brother’s best friend. Why have you been acting so differently lately?”

He watched her chew on her bottom lip before answering.

“I’m sorry, Ryan. After last week, I couldn’t get that conversation out of my head. Truth be told, I’ve been a bit curious since,” she confessed.

Against his better judgment, Ryan had to ask her. Even if she was interested in him like that, they couldn’t cross that line.

“Curious about what?” he asked.

“Sex,” Sadie replied, and her cheeks flushed. “I’ve fooled around with guys, but I’ve never had someone inside me before. After we talked about the whole virgin think last week, I couldn’t stop thinking about what it’d be like to have sex with you.”

Ryan gulped. If he had any shred of decency left, he would stand up and walk out the door. If he stayed, he’d dig his grave deeper.

However, Sadie looked so vulnerable and innocent, that he knew he couldn’t leave her like this. He wasn’t a complete asshole, and he had some willpower left.

“Are you saying that you want to have sex with me?” he asked carefully.

Sadie froze, and her face scrunched up like she was confused as to how to respond.

“No, I don’t know. I was overthinking things, and I stepped over a boundary. I’m sorry. It was stupid of me,” she said and turned away from him.

This was another moment where Ryan had the opportunity to leave before things got intense. But he didn’t want to leave, not when his childhood crush just admitted to being vaguely interested in him.

“Sadie, it wasn’t stupid, just not the best idea. You’re like family to me, and I can’t betray Jake like that,” he said, hoping that he let her down gently.

She faced him and stared into his eyes. Ryan saw something in them that had him yearning to make a swift exit. The contemplative look on her face rooted him in place, and he knew it was only a matter of time before he gave in.

“Do you want to, though?” she asked.

Ryan chewed on the inside of his cheek. “Do you really want to know the answer to that?”

She shifted closer to him, and he inhaled sharply. With her sitting so close to him, he was rapidly running out of reasons to not sleep with her.

“Yes, I do,” she said and leveled him with an intense gaze. Her hand drifted to his, and she laid hers on top. Her thumb lightly grazed his knuckles, and he struggled to make a coherent answer.

“Sadie,” Ryan said softly and closed his eyes. He couldn’t lie to her.

“Yes,” she prodded.

Ryan opened his eyes and met her gaze. “Yeah, I do want to. I had a crush on you when we were kids that followed me to high school. But then you got a boyfriend, and I went off to college shortly after. I put it behind me, but then you enrolled in the same university. I was fine up until this current semester when we started spending more time together.”

He took a shuddering breath and continued.

“Jake wanted me to look out for you since he read about all the horrible statistics for college women. I’m trying to be a good friend to you both,” he said. “I can’t do that if we go farther than harmless flirting.”

He looked deep into her eyes and hoped that she got the message. Sadie didn’t blink once when he spoke, and he couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad thing. Her hand was still on his.

“Wow,” she replied, speechless for the first time in a while. “You’ve really liked me for that long?”

Ryan nodded. Heat crept into his cheeks, and he wished he withheld that information. It sure wasn’t helping him now.

“Yeah, so that’s partly why I can’t just jump into bed with you. It wouldn’t be some meaningless thing for me,” he added because the cat was already out of the bag.

“Anything with you would never be meaningless to me, Ryan,” Sadie said, and those words took his breath away.

Her face moved closer to his. “Like you said, we’ve known each other for years, and we care about each other. If we did this, it would be special.”

She threaded her fingers through his, and Ryan’s heart leapt into his throat. His resistance was fading fast, and he was so close to giving into his desires, consequences be damned.

“There’s no one I trust more to be my first,” she continued. “I want it to be special and with someone who cares for and respects me. Don’t you want that for me to?”

While he was so focused on her face, Ryan barely noticed Sadie moving their joined hands to her thigh. Once he felt her soft skin under his fingers, he swallowed her hard.

This battle was lost, and he couldn’t deny her anymore.

He leaned in close to her, and he heard her inhale sharply.

“Sadie, I want everything for you. Of course I want to be your first, showing you how to make love and feeling you indulge in every pleasurable sensation that arises within you. I want to make you scream and moan with every touch, and I want to hold you in my arms after it’s all over. Is that what you want?” he asked.

Her lips parted in want.

“Gods, yes,” she answered in a choked-up voice. “Is it wrong that I want it to be you?”

“No,” Ryan said and brought her wrist up to his lips. “Not at all.”

She flashed him a flirty grin. “Good because I don’t want anyone else.”

“I want to kiss you,” Ryan said.

“Then kiss me.”

With a surge of courage, Ryan placed his hand on her cheek and pulled her in for a kiss. Their lips met softly, and he groaned internally when her mouth pressed against his.

All the emotions he felt over the course of their lives together rushed to his head, and he swayed slightly. He eased up on her lips before taking them again in a tender kiss. Remembering to breathe through his nose, more pleasant sensations filled him as he immersed himself in the feel of Sadie’s lips.

They were plump but soft, and he nibbled on her bottom lip until she gasped quietly. Smiling into the kiss, his thumb stroked her cheek, and he teased her lips with his tongue.

Want and desire coursed through his veins, and Ryan was almost scared of the intensity of his feelings. This wasn’t normal lust or unrequited feelings, but something much more that had the power to make or break him. He just hoped that she felt the same way.

Sadie’s lips parted against his, and he deepened the kiss. Her mouth was warm and receptive, his tongue playfully tangled with hers. Her fingers balled on top on their joined hands, and she slid them higher up her inner thigh.

He felt the heat emanating from her shorts, and he regretfully tore his mouth away from hers. Struggling to draw air into his lungs, he tried to clear his mind and give her one more chance to change her mind before they progressed further.

“We really shouldn’t be doing this,” he whispered. He knew he was already a lost cause, but he needed to be sure that she wanted this.

“Why not? We both want this, Jake’s not here to kick your ass, and Hannah is off recuperating at her parents’ house for the weekend. It’s lovely that you’re double checking with me, but I assure you that I really want this,” Sadie replied.

Her breathing was as ragged as his, and her pupils were dilated enough that he had no doubt that she wanted him.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Ryan said. He chewed on his bottom lip as he waited for her answer.

“If you go slow and get me wet enough, I heard that it won’t hurt,” she said.

Ryan chuckled, and the anxiety washed away. He saw the humor shining in her eyes.

“I meant emotionally,” he added. “I don’t want to break your heart or anything.”

“Aw, you’re a true gentleman,” Sadie said and kissed him.

He eagerly returned the kiss, and he didn’t flinch this time when her hand moved to his crotch.

“You won’t hurt me,” she whispered against his lips. “I trust you.”

“Okay,” Ryan said, taking her word for it. If he saw any hesitation or fear on her part, he would stop.

“Do you want to move this to your bedroom?” he asked. He could hardly believe that he finally had the chance to utter those words to her.

“Yeah,” she replied and looked away shyly. “I have condoms and lube in my dresser.”

Ryan touched her chin softly. “If you’re scared, we don’t have to do this.”

Sadie tucked a strand of hair behind her head. “I’m not scared, just nervous.”

“It’s okay to be nervous. Just let me know when and if you need me to slow down, okay?” he said, and she nodded.

He smiled and kissed her softly. “Good, let’s go.”