Chapter Thirty-Four

Tears ran down my face. I read the letter four times in an attempt to completely understand it. The address and phone number for Andrew Moore was scribbled down and at the bottom under her name, it was dated the day before she died. I had no doubt in my mind that she’d meant for me to have that letter eight years before.

My heart broke when I thought about how she’d kept her feelings a secret for fear of being judged. I had no clue that my sister had any interest in Laurie. I’d always just assumed she was interested in Drew. I was a little hurt she hadn’t felt like she could trust me with that information but I understood why. I also respected Drew for keeping that secret for her.

With my face buried in the pillow and Drew’s keychain clenched in my fist, I cried for my sister. I cried for my parents. I cried for the world because it wasn’t nearly as bright without Kira Butler.

I didn’t sleep hardly at all that night. My thoughts were racing with everything I’d learned in one day. Dad had forgiven Mom. Drew had liked me all those years ago. Kira had given her blessing on the two of us having a relationship. I was the idiot everyone had subtly been saying I was for days.

What. The. Hell.

I blinked awake on Saturday morning, a total mess. The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was Drew’s hat. Its new home was on my nightstand, right next to where I put the keychain every night and in front of a printed photo at the two of us from the ball.

I was a glutton for punishment.

Reaching over, I grabbed his blue cap and hugged it to my body while looking at our smiling faces. The photo was cheesy in that prom-sense but we looked so happy. He also looked incredibly handsome and my heart ached just seeing his face.

Guilt seeped into my pores from how I’d treated him. Yes, he had lied by omission but I’d stomped on his heart. I wish he’d attempted to explain a bit more but then I wondered if I would have even given him the chance. Hell, he might have tried but I was so lost in my self-pity and anger than I didn’t hear him. I’d let my pride and embarrassment make me deaf and blind to what I had in front of me.

And I had to fix it.

After texting Hannah, who asked Jordan, I had Drew’s current address in Los Angeles. It wasn’t even nine in the morning when I got into my car, punched the numbers into my GPS, and set off for California.

It was slightly more than four hundred miles, almost seven hours, one gas stop, one bathroom break, and one McDonalds drive-thru later before I was pulling into a neighborhood in East LA. I drove down the street slowly, searching for the house number Jordan had given me.

Nervous butterflies swarmed in my stomach at the thought of seeing Drew again. It’d only been a week but it felt like a lifetime. I was nervous. Nervous that he wouldn’t accept my apology, that he wouldn’t be happy to see me. Hell, I was nervous that he would accept my apology and accept me with open arms.

Like I said, I was a mess.

A car turned into a driveway in front of me and I slowed down when I realized the driveway belonged to the house I was looking for. I came to a stop in front of the neighbor, allowing me a moment before I revealed myself.

I was glad I did.

Drew stepped out of the driver’s side of the car, looking amazing in a pair of jeans and a grey t-shirt. His messy hair brought a smile to my face and caused my fingers to itch with the desire to touch it. The hat on the seat next to me belonged on his head and I was ready to give it back in exchange for his forgiveness. The smile I was wearing died quickly when a woman got out of the passenger side of the car, though.

She was beautiful. Her long, lithe legs were on display under the tiny black shorts she was wearing and her white tank top showcased her ample breasts and flat stomach. Her long, deep red hair fell perfectly across her shoulders when she flipped it back and I shook my head. She could have been a freakin’ model.

I watched as Drew met her at the hood of the car and then loped his arm across her shoulder, pulling her to his side. She wrapped her own her arm around his back and fell into step next to him. He said something and she laughed, tipping her head back as she did. He was laughing, too, and they headed up the walkway and through the front door.

My eyes stayed fixed to the closed door long after they’d disappeared through it. Pain sliced across my chest. Before I could think about it too much, I put my car in drive and took off down the street. I was only about a mile away when I pulled over to the side of the road and dropped my head to the steering wheel.

“It’s Drew, Shaylee,” I told myself quietly. “He wouldn’t move on this fast. You need to go back.”

I repeated that mantra to myself several times before I actually turned my car around to head back to Drew’s house. This time, I parked in front of his house and turned off my ignition. With newfound determination, I marched up the walk way I’d seen him on just moments before and pressed the doorbell as soon as I could reach it. I twisted his cap in my hands nervously, using it as my anchor.

Those butterflies were back, feeling like millions of them had set up home in my stomach. Each second felt like a year and it took about twenty of those to pass before the door opened. When it did, I decided that I was absolutely an idiot.

The redhead stood in front of me. She wasn’t in the clothes she had been ten minutes earlier. In fact, she wasn’t in any clothing. A black lace bra and a pair of matching underwear sat on her perfect body. If that hadn’t been enough to smash my heart, what she had draped over her shoulders was.

The throw blanket I’d made and given to Drew.

She pulled it closed and a slight blush settled on her pretty face. “Can I help you?”

“No.” My tongue felt thick and fat, making it hard to speak, but I shook my head and forced the words out. “I have the wrong address. Sorry to bother you.”

Without waiting for a reply, I turned and dashed towards my car, moving faster than I had in the camp challenge just weeks before. I ripped the door open, slammed the key in the ignition after the third try, and pulled away as fast as humanly possible. I had to pull over a few minutes later, once I was far enough away from his house, due to the tears completely obstructing my vision.

He’d found someone else. I couldn’t even fault him for moving on but it didn’t stop me from feeling like everything inside of me was broken. The hurt was overwhelming, similar to the pain I’d felt when I lost Kira.

Because now? I’d lost Drew, too.