After that dumb kid took Liam’s beanie in the park earlier today, it took 12.8 seconds for him to catch a cold. So now, I’m rocking him near the fireplace, hoping he’ll fall asleep after hours of whining from not being able to breathe.

“Alright, buddy, alright. I’ll ask your daddy to get you something to help on his way home from the party.” I could order something from the corner store now, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable opening the door to a stranger without Liam here.

“Babababaa….”

“I know, buddy.” Pulling out my phone, I compose a text, knowing I won’t get the baby medicine for another couple hours, even though something tells me Liam’s going to be up half the night anyway. I’m only a few letters in when I hear the front door opening.

Not expecting Kase for a while—it’s not even 10 PM yet, and his father-in-law lives up in the Westchester area—I stand, clutching Liam against me. We both stop breathing to listen. Footsteps stomp through the hall in a hurry, heading upstairs. What the hell? Kase would at least tell me it’s him and he’s home.

“Hello?” I call out, my stomach in my throat. If there’s an intruder, my best bet is to go outside with Liam, run off, and get to safety. I hurry into the foyer, about to grab both our coats, when I hear a familiar voice cursing and then the sound of a wall or door being punched. “Kase?”

“It’s me, Alana. Don’t come up here.”

Something is wrong—very wrong. “What is it? What happened?” I start up the steps but stop. I might think I know him well, but you don’t really know a person until you’ve seen them through thick and thin.

Liam’s blue eyes are wide and soaking in the sounds upstairs. He looks to me for answers, but I don’t have any. I hum a little song until he lays his head down on my chest. We stand there so long, waiting for Kase to make an appearance that eventually, Liam falls asleep through my pacing and singing. Slowly, I make my way over to the play room where I can put him to sleep in his play pen. I’d much prefer putting him to bed for the night upstairs in his crib, but I don’t trust Kase right now.

He goes down easily. I put Liam’s blue bunny next to him and cover him with his cozy blanket, then close the door, leaving it ajar. Time to go see what’s going on. Did something happen at the party?

At the foot of the stairs, I call up, “Kase?”

Suddenly, a flurry of heavy footsteps sounds down the upstairs hall, and he descends the stairs in a hurry. I wish I could tell him he looks handsome in the suit he’s wearing, because it does, and I was too annoyed with him earlier to tell him, but there’s something in his face. Something serious has happened.

Over his shoulder, a bag is slung. “Move, please.” He brushes past me toward the door.

“Where are you going?” I hold onto his arm instinctively.

He pauses to look at it, then yanks his arm away. “Away from here.”

“What’s wrong?”

He pauses, hangs his head, half in shame, half in despair. For a moment, I think he’s going to lose it. “I don’t know, Alana. I just…I need to get out of here.”

“Kase…” I rush over to him, hold his arms firmly, and look up at him. “Tell me what happened. We can talk about this, whatever it is. Just…don’t go.” Panic rises in my chest. If he leaves, what’ll happen? Do I stay put with Liam? Do I report his leaving to the police, tell them that my employer took off without a trace?

“I have to leave, Alana. I’ll make sure you’re taken care of for a few days—”

“What? No. Kase, please.” I tug on his jacket, but he only pushes me back and re-slings his bag over his shoulder. “Where are you going?”

“No fucking clue.”

“Please tell me what’s happening. I can help.”

“You can’t help, Alana!” he shouts. His icy glare on me is a warning. I’m pushing him. But I can’t simply let him go either. Liam needs him—I need him.

“Why are you acting like this?” I beg.

“I’m not who you think I am.”

“Who are you, a murderer? Are you wanted in fifty states? Because, if you are, I still don’t think I could undo the way I feel for you, Kase. Tell me what’s going on. Please.” Overwhelming emotion overcomes me. “I love you.”

He stares at me, long and hard. “You don’t know what love is until you’ve lost the most important person to you, Alana. You have no clue.”

“I know enough,” I fight back. “No, I haven’t lost a wife like you have, but—”

“I haven’t lost a wife, Alana!” He pinches the bridge of his nose and breathes slowly until he’s calm. He looks at me. “I was never married. I didn’t love Liam’s mother.” So, it’s as I thought…he only married her because of the baby. But then… “In fact, I’m not even Liam’s father.”

I can’t stop staring at him. “What?”

“I’m not his father. I’m nobody to him, Alana. I married my best friend to get her out of a quandary, and now my life’s fucking falling apart.”

“Why did you do that?”

“She needed me. She risked losing her inheritance, because her father’s ancient and would never go for her being a single mom. It’s the same bullshit that happened to my mother.”

“What happened to your mother?”

“Never mind, Alana!” He storms toward the door and turns the handle.

I have to speak now or risk losing him. “But you love him, Kase. You take care of him. He loves you like his father, so that’s all that matters. I don’t judge you.” In fact, this might be shocking, but it’s nothing that can’t be solved.

“That’s not all that matters,” he says, torment in his dark eyes. “Liam’s father came to the party tonight. Caused a huge scene. He plans on taking him, Alana. He plans on taking my son.” Kase cringes into his fist, and suddenly, I feel how hard this is for him. He wasn’t Evie’s husband and he’s not Liam’s father, and now it’s clear to everybody that he’s been lying.

Fuck.

“I’m nobody to Liam. I’m nobody to anyone.”

“You’re everything to me.” I pull him in, burying my face in his chest, and push the door closed. “Stay with me, please.”

“Alana…” My name comes out a whisper. Kase collapses in a heap of sobs against my body, but then he pulls himself together, drops his bag, and carries me up the stairs. “I need you so fucking badly.” No explanation necessary, but I know this won’t solve everything. Somehow, we have to keep him from losing Liam.

Kase drops me to my feet then shoves me against the wall roughly, all without reaching his bed. My arms are forced up and my shirt is pushed up over my head. Hungrily, he latches onto my tits, squeezing and sucking them hard, and my body arches into his mouth. I need more. I need him completely. I never realized how deeply I want to be his woman until tonight.

“I can help you, Kase.” I don’t know how I could possibly, but somehow, we can navigate this shitstorm together. “Make love to me, please.”

He grunts in response, pulls off the rest of my clothes, and drags me to the bed. Suddenly, I’m flat on my back and he’s between my legs, shirt yanked off, and his pants around his knees. There’s something feral in his eyes. He’s not a man tonight but something entirely new. Maybe his demons have finally possessed him and now I’m going to feel the consequences of my pursuit. He’s going to show me why I should’ve stayed away from him, like he warned me to so many times.

Kase pants, grits his teeth, and tells me to open my legs wider. I do as he says and he mutters, “Slather your ass, Alana. Take that delicious pussy juice and smear it all over your ass.”

My body tightens, though with fear or anticipation, I’m not sure. All I know is that I’ll do anything for him, just like I told him that first day. Anything. If I have to bend over and take it up the ass for the first time to get him to stay, then that’s what I’ll do. I know that goes against everything this world has ever taught me, but this world doesn’t understand how much I love and trust this man.

This man I shouldn’t want but do.

This man I shouldn’t pursue but can’t stop.

This man I adore.

I do as he says then watch as he sheds the rest of his clothes, knees between my legs and pushes the head of his cock against my pussy. Dragging it around, he gets it wet then pushes his fingertip against my tight asshole. I’ve heard things. About pain and getting filled and feeling like it’s just too much, but I can do this.

I want this as much as he does, even if I’m a little frightened too…

Across Kase’s face is an eclipsed moon of conflict. I can tell he doesn’t want to hurt me or take advantage of me anymore, but I can also tell that I’m his only solace in this world and needs me now, more than ever. And that’s all I ever wanted—to be his woman.

“Go slow, please,” I tell him. It’s my only request.

Kase moves from my pussy to my ass and begins to push in slowly. “I can’t promise anything.” I know. Tonight he’s an alpha wolf and I’m his submissive mate. I can’t control his speed anymore than I can control his pain.

But I can ease it.

Closing my eyes, I breathe deeply to relax and feel Kase’s massive cock beginning to fill me. There are no words to describe the depth and intimacy of this act. All I know is that in less than two months I’ve gone from complete virgin to Kase’s willing cockwhore, and I wouldn’t change a fucking thing.

When he’s in all the way, and I’m feeling like I’m going to explode, he leans down and kisses me strongly, with purpose. His eyes burn into my brain. “You win, Alana. You want me? Here I am.”

He’s got a plan, and I know what it is: he wants me to regret my decision to love him, by making this difficult and rough, so I’ll never want him again. But what he doesn’t understand is that he could never push me away. As long as he’ll have me, I’ll want to be with him. Even if he’s about to hurt me.

Suddenly, he pulls back and pushes in again. I cry out loud, gripping the sheets. He’s wrong. It doesn’t hurt, it overwhelms me, pushes me higher, teaches me new things about him. New things about myself. When he sees in my eyes that I’m not about to give up, that I want it harder and stronger than he’s ever given it to me before, he becomes unhinged.

Flipping me over, he pulls me to my knees, handling me like I have no free will, when everything about this is exemplary of my free will. All of it. And sooner or later, he’s going to realize that I’m the woman for him. Looking back, I see Kase preparing to push in again, only this time, he lets a long line of saliva fall from his mouth onto my ass. Swirling his cock around the fluids again, he pushes into my ass.

I moan and arch back into him. “More…harder,” I tell him.

“You’re a fucking masochist for pain, aren’t you, Alana? If you were smart, you’d leave me, find yourself a nice man who can love you the way you deserve.”

“I don’t want a nice man. I want the man I love.” Talking over my shoulder as he reams me in the ass is rebellious as fuck. No matter what he does to me, he won’t break me, won’t wear me down. With every push, I’ll push back. With every slam, I’ll slam back.

Before I know it, he’s full force fucking me, hoisting his foot onto the bed for leverage, balls slapping against my pussy. There’s pain, but it’s sweet pain, good pain, the pain of breaking down barriers and creating new pathways.

Another way for us to become one.

I will never not want this.