Noah
I can feel her in the other room.
Each of her steps crosses the floor with ease, slipping along the smooth hardwood as she drops her clothes like petals falling from the soft bulb of a rose.
The dress will cascade easily to the floor, beautiful blue fabric crumpling around her ankles until she steps away. Behind anyone else but Ariana, it’d be a mess. But with her, it’s a silken path leading me to where she waits.
And I know she does indeed wait.
I know she’s glided into the bed by now, letting the soft blanket rest on her naked body. I know she looks expectantly at the door, holding her breath and listening for the sound of my door unlocking, the sound of me hastily leaving the hallway and throwing up her door. I know she waits for me to rip back the blanket and expose her to the soft light of the moon outside her open window.
I know that she wants me to slip my fingers down to her hips, curling around her thighs…
Biting back a groan, instead of leaping up and to the beautiful woman in the next room, I flip over onto my stomach and bury my face into the pillow.
I do not stay here for lack of wanting Ari.
I’ve never wanted a single woman so much in my life before her, or after. I’d never run my fingers through hair as soft as hers, or gazed at a mouth I’d so longed to kiss.
But tonight, I could not go to her.
I didn’t trust myself, or her, for that matter.
That kiss… It was one I would not easily forget. It was one that would linger in the back of my mind for months. Every time Ari spoke I would be watching her mouth move. Every time Ari sighed, I would notice the slight pucker of her full lips and wish that they were mine and mine alone to taste.
Though we were going to be married, it was on paper only. We would live together and portray they very image of happy family, but I would never know what truly Ariana was thinking. I’d thought I’d known before, years ago, but I hadn’t at all.
But none of that worried me.
I wasn’t concerned with how real our marriage would truly be. What concerned me was how very real the kiss that we’d shared had felt. What concerned me was how it rocked me to the core.
Tentatively, I brush my lips with my fingertips, almost expecting to feel the sweet remnants of her peach flavored gloss though there was none to be found.
There had been something frightening in that kiss. Something worrying. It’d woken something in me that had been dormant for years, something that I’d never felt since the last I’d seen Ari. Something that I never felt I would experience again.
How could she bring that out of me so quickly? How could she wrap herself against me without hesitation, pulling my heart from inside my chest with just the touch of her lips against my own?
How easy it was for her to fake passion, when she’d left me without a single word years ago?
Though I could resist her tonight. I knew tomorrow would be different. And the day after. Each graceful graze of her hand on mine, every wink and smile she shares with me, I know it will pull me further and further to the edge which I dared not plunge off ever again.
If Ari’s goal is to make me love her again, only to break me once more, I’m sure she will succeed.
~~
I don’t remember falling asleep, but when I wake I know I’ve dreamed of her.
I always know when I’ve dreamed of her.
My whole body feels heavy, like I’ve been ripped away from something beautiful and deep. The longing lingers in the back of my head, vaguely clinging to the shrouds of my dreams. I can’t remember it, which is even worse. If only I could have Ari in my dreams, perhaps that would help.
Slowly, I stretch my body out on the blanket, turning my head to greet the early morning rays of the sun. The light is dewy and fresh, the clock barely past seven. It’d only been two in the morning when Ariana and I had retired to bed. I was surprised I was able to sleep even this long, knowing that Ari is here in the home with me.
Has she woken yet? Or is she still wrapped the soft sheets?
A soft clink in the kitchen followed by a rustling of the pantry answers that question quickly enough. I can no longer hide in my room. I have to face her. I have to prepare myself to spend each and every day of the future at her side, knowing she isn’t truly my own.
In a few years, with a few million in her pocket, she will do exactly as she’d done before and vanish from my life.
With a sigh, I throw my legs off the bed and give a hearty stretch. My eyes close as I feel the tight muscles in my arms and legs clench and release. As the fragrance of sizzling bacon creeps under my door, I open it and step out into the bright living room.
Ari has her back to me at first, body swaying just slightly as she mixes a bowl in her hand. Irvine sits perched on the counter, nibbling on a piece of something that Ari’s given him. He glances up at me halfheartedly, not willing to leave the side of the woman feeding him scraps of tasty people food.
Glutton.
She turns, almost jumping when our eyes meet.
“Oh!” She exclaims with a timid giggle that didn’t suit her, staring intently down at the bowl in her arms. She mixes the batter a bit more fervently, clearing her throat, “Um. Morning.”
“Morning.” I echo, observing her discomfort. Maybe she regrets the way she came on to me last night. I was glad I was able to resist her offer now. I wouldn’t have been able to handle her regret of a night spent together.
“I’m making French toast.” She shrugs, setting down the mixing bowl as she dips her finger into it. She tastes it with a thoughtful frown, then lets Irvine lick the rest off her fingertip, “Needs more sugar.”
I don’t argue, even though I doubt that’s the case. Instead, I just watch as she drops another few teaspoons of glittery white powder into the mixture before turning on another burner on the stove top.
“The bacon is almost done, but I couldn’t figure out your coffeemaker.” She grins lamely, pointing at the tall machine.
“It’s complicated.” I shrug, walking over to it and tapping a few of the brightly lit LED buttons. It was some crazy prototype I’d gotten a few weeks ago from a businessman seeking an investment. I couldn’t imagine the complicated thing selling well, however.
Now the bitter scent of coffee mixed with the savoriness of the bacon and the sweetness of frying French toast. I didn’t tell Ari that I hadn’t once even used this kitchen for more than a quick turkey sandwich or coffee. It was nice to see the pots and pans in use, though Ari was using everything a bit too abundantly. It was probably going to take hours to clean up the tons of dishes and spoons she’d used for the breakfast.
Could she even cook?
She never had when we were together before.
Ari must’ve read my hesitance, because she waved the thick wooden spoon in her hand warningly at me, “Don’t you look at me like that mister, I can cook really well!”
I just grin. It’s impossible not to when she’s dancing around in an oversized shirt, singing some Michael Jackson song with a bit of flour dusted over her rosy cheeks.
I’m almost angry at how easily she brings a smile to my face.
She trades me a hearty slab of bacon on a plate for a cup of fresh coffee and cream, her fingers brushing across my hand as she gladly accepts the warm mug. Her eyes widen, flitting quickly up towards me.
“Noah…” She says abruptly, chewing on her bottom lip, “About last night-”
I shake my own head hastily, setting the plate down. My hands curl around her shoulders before I can think the motion through. Her body is soft and warm under my touch, the hem of the long t-shirt she’d found in the room riding up on her thighs.
My eyes are drawn like a magnet towards the supple flesh of her exposed legs and I have to bite back a startled groan of yearning.
“You don’t…” I mutter gutturally, trying to tear my eyes from the skin I so badly want to touch, “You don’t have to be sorry about it.”
She just nods, breathless, her chin tilting back to gaze at me. Her eyes skim my lips, the tip of her tongue tracing her upper lip as though she can still taste me on it. I’m sucked into her olive colored eyes and the curve of her lips, impossible to resist it. In seconds, my palms slide down her back, digging into her hips as I pick her up and lift her onto the kitchen counter. Instantly, her legs twine around my waist, fingers sliding across the back of my scalp, drawing me closer, dragging me in with the sweetness of her breath.
Just before my lips can taste hers, however, the front door bangs open with a shrill, familiar shriek.
“What the hell, Ari?!” A woman cries from the front door, stamping her foot.
I whirl, covering the half naked woman as best I can with my body, only to nearly topple over in shock. A woman who looks almost identical to the one in my arms stands at the door.
“Claire!” Ari cries, leaping off the counter and from my longing grasp, “What are you doing here?”
“I just knew it. I fucking knew it!” She glowers, pointing a dangerous finger towards me, “Don’t you dare try and pull my sister back into your greedy little paws!”
“Greedy little paws?” I echo, still stunned from the shock of two Arianas. Even though I’d known she had a twin, it was still enough to catch me off guard.
“I can’t believe you, Ari!” Claire continues, “Don’t you remember-”
“Claire.” My fiancée interrupts with a glare so hot it could have melted a polar ice cap off her sister’s brow. Ari glances back towards me grimly, lips set in a straight, firm line, “We have to tell her.”
~~
“The hell do you mean you’re getting married?” Claire asks for the thirtieth time, at least while Ari gives an exasperated sigh.
While I’d been sure the two were identical in every way at first glance, now that I’d listened to them speak and watched them interact, I could see the differences more clearly.
I probably wouldn’t be able to tell the difference if they were dressed the same and standing still, but their movements and speech patterns couldn’t have been farther apart.
“Noah needs help.” Ari frowns, rubbing her temples like she wasn’t used to dealing with someone as obstinate as she was. It was rather entertaining to her see match so well met, “And we need help too.” Ari adds with a pointed frown.
“You’re damn right he needs help.” Claire glares, refusing to look at me or acknowledge me in any way as if she could will me out of existence, “Psychological help.”
Then, suddenly, she turns her wrathful eyes towards me and I almost wish she’d go back to pretending I wasn’t in the room, “If you hurt my sister, I swear to the good god above that I will fucking… I will fucking… like write the worst Yelp review ever on you.” She pauses, glancing towards her sister, “Do lawyers even have Yelp pages?” She whispers, like I couldn’t hear her. Before Ari could even respond, Claire’s eyes go huge and she stiffens at the table, “Wait, Ari, you’re not doing this because… because of me, are you?”
Ari glances at me, then her sister, then down at her hands, “It’s not just because of you, Claire.”
“Perhaps you could apply for some financial aid, Claire?” I offer, narrowing my eyes and scrutinizing the woman’s response. Just as I thought, confusion flickers across her face though she tries in vain to conceal it.
“Ah. Well. I can’t?” She frowns at Ari, her statement an accidental question.
Ari tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and shakes her head, “The money wasn’t for Claire to go to school.” She sighs.
I keep my face blank, unsure if she’d be angry at me for having figured that out already.
“I got into trouble.” Claire interrupts, and I’m proud of her for voicing this herself. The girls’ parents clearly weren’t the type to recognize their own trouble in any way. It was good to see Ari’s sister was different.
Claire gazes at me with hard eyes, her jaw clenched. With that fierceness in her eyes, she looked just like Ari. Ari reaches over, taking her sister’s hand in her own and the pair exchange a long look. I can almost feel whatever telepathic message they’re conveying to one another.
I know it’s whether or not to trust me.
“I owe… I owe some money to this man.” Claire sighs, chin dropping, “I thought I’d be able to pay him back. I thought I’d never have to tell anyone about it.”
I want to press on what Claire had been getting from the guy, but it’s obvious enough. Claire is bony and thin, her collarbone popping from her chest. It’s probably drugs.
Ari glances at me warily, waiting for me to call out her sister. I keep my mouth shut.
“How much?” Ari asks for me, still clutching her sister’s hand tight, “How much do you owe him?”
“Daniel wants twenty thousand.” She responds bitterly, tears bursting in her eyes, “He’s so disgusting-”
“I’ll take care of it.” Ari interrupts, dragging her sister against her chest. She hesitates, glancing towards me, “We’ll take care of it.”
“Yes, we will.” I agree with a firm nod, “We’ll wipe that debt clear. But you can’t ever ask Daniel for money again. Do you understand?”
Claire nods, lifting her tear stained cheek from Ari’s shoulder, “I won’t. I swear. I won’t ever go near him again.”
“Good.” I say, running a hand through my hair.
This was not at all what I needed right now. My reputation was already on the line enough. Now I was going to have to make dealings with some drug dealer.
“I should take her home.” Ari says softly, jerking her chin towards her sister.
“Of course.” I agree, standing up and walking to the kitchen. I wrap up a plate filled with French toast and bacon, pour the coffee into two travel mugs, and bring it back.
The skinny twin eyes the food hungrily, Ari and I exchanging another glance.
“You take this to the car, I’ll be right there.” Ari smiles at her sister, kissing the top of her head. Though they were the same age, and technically Claire was slightly older, Ari was clearly the more mature of the two.
Claire nods, taking the plate and one of the coffees. She heads towards the front door then pauses to glance back at me.
“Thanks, Noah.” She says quietly, pausing to glance at her sister, then back at me, “But I mean it when I say don’t hurt her.”
Why in the world would Claire think that I would hurt Ari when it was Ari who’d left me before?
It didn’t make sense.
But right now that was the least of my worries.
Claire vanishes out the door as Ari rushes into the room and changes into some spare clothes in the room. When she returns, I catch her arm and pull her backwards.
“Don’t do anything stupid, alright?” I say quietly, “Like going to see that man all by yourself.”
She stares at me, frowning, “What do you mean?”
“Take me with you if you go, or let me handle it by myself. But do not go anywhere near him until I figure out what his deal is.”
Lightly, she pulls away, shaking her head slowly.
“I won’t.” She murmurs.
“Promise?”
She just nods, clutching her cup of coffee tight in her hands.
“When are you coming back?” I ask, the words startling even myself.
I hadn’t meant to ask her that.
She gazes at me, eyebrows lifting towards her hairline, “Well… I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”
“You’re going to be living here soon enough.” I smirk as she blinks in surprise.
Is that a blush on her cheeks?
“Yeah, well… I don’t want you to get too tired of me before we get married.” A slight smile crosses her lips tentatively.
“Hey. Ari?” I say as she steps towards the door, turning slightly to gaze at me over her shoulder, “Remember what you promised me. That you won’t do anything stupid.”
She grins and I know in that instant that she is planning something exactly that.
“I never do.” She responds with a sly wink, vanishing out the doorway.
I step to the window, watching as she walks easily towards her car, tossing her hair over her shoulder. Her hips sway, chin tipping upwards to greet the cool fall breeze.
Whatever reckless thing she was about to do, she was working hard to fool me into thinking she wasn’t scheming anything.
That made me even more worried for her.
The morning light is cheery and golden hued, the birds are chirping, and the air is cool.
But even I know that danger can hide in even the most brightly lit of places.