Chapter Thirty-One
Lilly
I cry in my room for hours in Tink’s arms that night, it's the first time I've really cried since I was a kid and I feel broken not just from Stryker not helping me. I just feel helpless something I've always hated, I hate not being in control of anything. The loss of control is an over powering feeling of despair and one I hate, Stryker had come to my door the moment I locked it knocking begging me to open it but I had my mini pit-bull with me yelling at Stryker to go fuck himself for a little mousy thing Tink can be a tornado when she's angry and she was pissed.
“HOW FUCKING DARE, HE NOT HELP YOU” she’d said over and over pacing the floor back and forth for over an hour. She'd worked herself up so much, then she just got even more pissed off and went down stairs to get the bottle of tequila out of the kitchen cupboard. So now here I was all cried out and very very drunk sitting on the bedroom floor.
“I can't believe he didn't help you”
“Yeah I know”
“I wanted to hit her myself” she says and I smile
“I know that's why I knew we had to leave”
“I really wanted to kill that bitch”
“I know the feeling”
“Are you really breaking up with Stryker”
“I don't know Tink I really love him I just.... I don't know”
“Do you want to move out” I look around mine and Stryker’s room
“I don't know”
“What do you think he saw in her?”
“Honestly, I have no idea, I mean where totally opposite. She's tall skinny huge tits who wouldn't like her, Where I'm short round and have freckles”
“What are you talking about your naturally beautiful, she has to contour shit so she can look like you on your worse day”
“Tink you know just what to say to make me feel better”
“Hay you wanna do something stupid”
“Like what?”
“Well we've already got our buzz on let’s go out” I look at her
“Fuck it lets do it” she jumps up and holds out her hand
“Come on” It takes us another hour of choosing a dress hair and makeup
“You look really good Lilly”
“So, do you Tink, let’s go and have fun” she laughs almost falling over, the cab pulls up to the curb and honks
“That's the cab come on” just before I open the door I freeze
“What?”
“What if Stryker is out there”
“So, what?”
“He won't let me go”
“He can't tell you what to do, come on” she pulls me towards the stairs as we hear the horn honk again. We creep down the stairs just as Stryker’s walking in through the front door and we stop
“Where the fuck, do you think you’re going” he says pissed off
“Out” Tink says
“Like fuck” I watch these two, face off like the bitch and I were just hours ago
“Where going out Stryker you’re not her Dad”
“No fuckin’ shit but she's my women”
“Oh, so now she's your women”
“Don't fuckin start Tink”
“DON'T START....DON'T START YOUR AN ASSHOLE YOU LEFT HER TO THE WOLVES YOU ASSHAT WHAT DID YOU WANT HER TO DO HIT A PREGNANT CHICK”
“NO OF COURSE NOT”
“THAN WHY DIDN'T YOU HELP HER”
“SHE NEEDS TO LOOK OUT FOR HERSELF IN THE CLUB”
“YOUR AN ASSHOLE STRYKER YOU SHOULD HAVE HELPED HER
“ALL RIGHT ENOUGH” I yell at them both and they both turn to look at me
“Stryker, Tink and I are going out to as you say get a release so move our cabs waiting”
“No, it's not” I look out to the curb but the cabs gone
“You ass, you sent it away”
“Yes, I fuckin’ sent it away you’re not goin’ anywhere”
“AAAARRRGGGHHH you can't tell me what to do”
“Yes, I fuckin’ can”
“No, you fucking can't”
“Yes, I fuckin’ can”
“What the fuck is goin’ on” we all turn to see Tiny standing there
“Lilly and I are going out” Tink says smiling
“Ok, so why the yellin’”
“Because of what, your asshat of a son did tonight” Tink says
“Is this over the cunt” Tiny asks
“Yes” Tink says and Tiny sighs
“Come on” he, motions for us to follow him, we all head into the kitchen “Sit all of you” he says and as we take a seat, it's the first time that Stryker doesn't pull me into his lap and I feel my heart skip a beat at the loss of not being with him. We all sit and Tiny looks at me “Lilly, you know that the club is a hard life and we need to know that the women that we bring into the club can handle themselves”
“But” Tink says but Tiny holds up his hand
“Look I'm not sayin’ that what the boy did wasn't hard on you, but we need that piece of mind when we go away on runs or when you’re not with us we need to feel safe knowin’ that you can look after yourself. In the club, our way of life is a brutal one and if you can't handle that than you both need to let this go” I look over to Stryker who is grinding his teeth so hard I can hear it and I smile, he looks at me and reaches out his hand and I stare at it. I see Tink next to him shaking her head but I can't help it I put my hand in his and he pulls me to him for me to sit in his lap and he kisses me.
“ARGH” I hear Tink sigh “At least tell me we can still go out” I look at Stryker and he nods his head yes
“Yes, you can go out but I'm comin’” Stryker says and Tink sighs again
*
We head to the bar that the club own and one that Tiny manages The Devils Den more night club than bar the live band is great and the atmosphere of the place is fantastic. Tiny and Stryker came with us and the drinks where free all night “You hear alone” I hear some guy whisper into my ear as Tink and I are dancing and I shake my head no
“No, were not sorry”
“Oh yeah, who you hear with?”
“She's with me” I hear and the guy turns and see's Stryker, Cuff, Gunner, Blaze, Chance, Tank and his wife Lena who I really like, they'd all come in for a few drinks. The guy doesn’t say anything just walks off and Stryker pulls me to him “You havin’ fun baby” I nod my head
“You want another drink”
“No, I'm good I think I've had to many anyway”
“Ok” he pulls me closer to him and we dance body to body