Four
“Wow, this is really nice,” Fiona said when I showed her the apartment.
“Yeah, I’m really fortunate that Anna had room for me. But I would have slept on the floor rather than go back to my parent’s house this summer. Wine?” She nodded and I filled a glass with a sweet red that Anna had several bottles of.
She drifted around the apartment, paying attention to Lacey’s photographs and the framed articles that Anna had put up everywhere.
“So, Lacey is a journalist?” I handed her the glass of wine and she clinked it against mine before taking a sip.
“More of a photographer turned journalist. She travels all around writing articles and taking pictures of people. She also does boudoir photography specifically for queer people as well.” I motioned to the studio-slash-my-bedroom.
“That’s really cool,” she said, looking around at the lighting equipment and various props that were stacked in corners and shoved away. Every day I made sure to keep the studio as clean as possible so Lacey wouldn’t come back to a disaster in her work space. I wanted to be a good guest, even if they wouldn’t let me pay rent. I could unload the dishwasher and vacuum and keep my shit looking nice. It was the least I could do.
“Yeah, I haven’t met Lacey yet, but Anna loves her, so I’m sure she’s great.” Murder chose that moment to make his appearance and jumped up on the couch.
“Hey, little monster,” I said, leaning down to scratch his ears the way he liked.
“Oh, isn’t he pretty,” Fiona said, holding her hand out to Murder so he could butt it with his head.
“This is Murder and he’s a good boy,” I said. Murder was going nuts with all the pets and attention and rolled over for belly rubs.
We both nearly jumped when the door opened and Anna called out.
“We’re just petting Murder,” I said.
“I swear that cat is the most spoiled cat on the face of the planet.” She looked burned out and tired, but she had a glass of wine in her hand when she walked into the studio.
“Hey, Fiona. Nice to see you again.” She gave Fiona a hug and me a look that told me she was keeping her eyes on us. She didn’t need to worry. We were good now. Or we were on our way to being good.
“Pizza is in the oven,” I said, and like it was meant to be, the timer dinged.
“Good, I’m starved,” Anna said. “I’m going to take the quickest shower possible if you don’t mind.” I shook my head as she walked to the bathroom.
“She’s the same,” Fiona said. “Well, except for the hair.” That was true. Anna hadn’t always had purple hair, but looking at her now, it suited her so well that it looked like it was meant to be.
“Some things don’t change,” I said. Fiona nodded and we went to get the pizza out of the oven.
*^*^*
“I had forgotten about that!” Anna said when we were talking about adolescent hijinks. Since she was my older cousin she had helped with a lot of our worse misdeeds. Fiona had been around for a lot of that.
“Yeah, I thought my parents were going to ground me for the rest of my natural life,” I said, remembering the time when we’d had a party in a back field and it had gotten way out of hand and somehow one of my friends had ended up passed out naked on the principal’s lawn the next morning. I hadn’t been responsible for that, but the party had been my idea. Still, I hadn’t forced anyone to get drunk and naked.
“I swear, I thought I was going to jail,” Fiona said. Her parents hadn’t been any more lenient than mine and had grounded her from seeing me (except for school) for a month, but it didn’t really work that well. Especially since they both went to bed early and were heavy sleepers and her bedroom was on the first floor. Seriously, did they think that was going to work?
“You and me both,” I said. The wine had gone to my blood and I was feeling safe and warm. Fiona had always had that effect on me. No matter who else I was with, as long as she was there, I felt grounded.
The pizza was gone and so was the bottle of wine and Anna was practically falling asleep at the table.
“Ugh, I have some work to do, so I’m going to go in the bedroom and see how much I can get done before I pass out. Sorry for bailing on you, but it’s been a long day.” Her speech was punctuated with a yawn.
“No, it’s fine. I should probably get going anyway,” Fiona said. It wasn’t that late, and I realized that I didn’t want her to go. I didn’t have to work the next day and planned on hanging out at the house, at least until Lacey got back. Anna had to work, so it was probably going to be a little awkward at first and I’d wanted to avoid that as much as possible.
Anna bid us goodnight and shuffled off to the bedroom.
“You don’t have to go. I mean, not right now. If you don’t want to,” I said in a rush.
“Okay,” she said, picking up the plates and heading to the sink to rinse them off. I followed her with the rest and we got the dishes in the dishwasher and then drifted over to the couch.
“This is really nice,” she said. “That you don’t have to stay with your parents.” I nodded.
“I don’t know if I could have lasted with them for an entire summer. I’m going to have to figure something out for next year, but for right now, I’m good.” If I could afford to, I would have gotten my own apartment, but there was no way I could afford that right now. School was too expensive, even though I’d gotten a ton of loans to pay for it.
“I know what you mean,” she said, slipping her shoes off and pulling her feet up on the couch.
Murder appeared again and jumped up between us for more affection.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you have to stay with them.” She nodded.
“It’s okay. I’m tough and I can take it. And someday I’ll have my own place and I’ll only have to see them on holidays.” I was also looking forward to that time.
“Is it really bad?” I asked. Fiona didn’t like to talk about her parents a whole lot, even when we were younger. She’d just shut down and clam up when I asked.
“No, it’s not. It’s really not.” She busied herself with scratching under Murder’s chin.
“Is there somewhere else you could go?” She shook her head and looked up.
“It’s fine. It’s temporary. And they’re paying for me to go to school.” I was in a similar boat. If my parents decided they didn’t want to help me with school, I’d be fucked.
“We can talk about something else if you want,” I said, petting the spot on Murder’s back that he loved. “Or we could watch a movie? Quietly, because Anna’s sleeping.”
“No, I should go. This has been . . . a day.” It had been. I was going to be up pretty late thinking about everything that had happened. Everything that had been said, on both sides.
“It has,” I agreed and we both got up as I walked her to the door.
“Thank you,” she said, gripping my shoulder. For a second I thought she was going to pull me close and kiss me. As if it was nothing. As if it was just something she wanted to do. If she kissed me right now, I wouldn’t know what to do. Or how I would react. Part of me would want to push her away and another part of me, a part I would have liked to ignore, would want to pull her closer.
But she didn’t kiss me, and I was definitely going to ponder what would have happened if she had.
“Text me,” I blurted out.
“Okay,” she said, giving me a lopsided smile that made my heart flip over and remember all the other times she’d given me that smile.
Shit.
“Bye,” I said, the word a little strangled. She gave me a little wave and I closed the door, resting my back on it.
What a day.