Tara
I have no idea what time Nate got home, but the main thing is that he’s here.
Asleep on the couch.
I lean against the wall as I watch him sleep. His chest rises and falls slowly and I step closer, grabbing the blanket to cover him. Only my foot lands heavily on something on the floor. I look down, realizing that I’m standing on his cell phone.
Shit.
Reaching down, I check the screen to make sure I haven’t damaged it. As soon as I have it in my hands I get the urge to do something I know I shouldn’t. Scrolling through to the contacts, I search for Brewer’s number. My hands shake and the pulse in my neck thuds as I find exactly what I was looking for. Tiptoeing out of the living room and into the kitchen, I grab my phone and make a note of the number, typing it into my contacts list. What I’d do with the number at this moment in time hasn’t been decided. All I know is that I have it. I have a way to get in touch with him, if I decide that’s what I want to do.
Creeping back over to Nate, I carefully place the phone back in its exact spot before heading back upstairs. Right now, with everything going on, I need to focus. Make myself think of something other than the mess that surrounds me. Pulling out a suitable outfit, I pull on my work clothes, quickly fix my hair and add a little makeup to my face before heading downstairs. I peep in to check on Nate. He’s still sleeping so I head into the kitchen and scribble him a note.
Gone into work.
Speak later, sleepyhead.
XOXO
With one final check over my shoulder, I grab my things and head out the door. The cool morning air hits my lungs. I inhale the fresh dewy smell, savoring it.
My short journey to work didn’t help to clear my head. All I can think is that I have his number, my real father’s number. I want to meet him, make up my own mind if he is someone I want in my life, but my mother’s words play over and over. He’ll kill her if he finds out. I can’t and won’t endanger my mother’s life. But it would be a lie if I didn’t say I was torn. I’m torn between the not knowing and hurting other people.
Pulling into the parking space, I cut the engine, release my seat belt and rest my head back against the seat. Why isn’t anything easy? I feel like I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t.
Blowing out a huge controlled breath, I lift my head, grab my purse and reach for the door handle. My eyes catch sight of someone standing in front of the car and I jerk back at the unexpectedness.
“Jesus, Brax. You scared the life out of me.”
Closing the door behind me, I look at him and the stern expression on his face.
“What are you doing here?” he asks.
“Well, duh, I work here.”
“We weren’t expecting you today.”
“Well, here I am.”
“Shouldn’t you be resting?”
“What is this, Brax? What’s going on?” Making my way over to the building, he walks beside me and I give him a look.
“Just that, you know, you could’ve let me know you were coming in today.”
“Jesus, anyone would think you didn’t want me here.”
Yanking open the door, I head toward the stairs, making my way into the office.
“It’s not that…” I hear him call after me.
“Tara, you’re… here,” Izzy says surprised. I narrow my eyes, glancing between the pair, frustrated by the way they’re acting. I scan the room and that’s when it becomes clear. A pint-sized brunette steps toward me, offering me her hand.
“I’m Eva.” She offers me a smile, her gaze falling to her hand that she holds out to me.
I turn back to Izzy, glaring at her. “You replaced me?”
“No, of course not.” She chuckles nervously. “We needed help, T. I wasn’t sure when you’d be back and Melody is spending so much time at the new club that it made sense to get some help in.”
“Here I am,” the new girl sings in a chipper voice.
I hate her already.
“Seriously. You know how busy we’ve been.”
“And I’m here now. So where do you want me, since new girl took my desk.”
“Take Brax’s,” she offers with her hand. “He’s mostly in meetings all the time anyway. And that kinda means we’re next to each other for a well overdue catchup!”
“Okay.” I smile, because you can’t stay angry with Isabelle. I make my way over to Brax’s desk, sliding down into the seat and glance to Izzy who sits in the desk beside mine.
“Tell me about the cabin by the lake. Oh, it sounded amazing.”
“It was.” I grin widely, thinking back to our time away. “Until Mom called.”
“Shit.”
“It’s not good, Izzy.”
“Wait… wait.” She jumps up from her seat. “I’ll make coffee first then you can tell me everything.”
Exhaling loudly, I give her a firm nod. Maybe the new girl was a good idea after all?
* * *
Once I’ve filled in Izzy about the whole shitty situation she sits looking at me with a stunned expression on her face.
“You cannot repeat any of this to Brax or Nate.”
“Scout’s honor.”
“This morning, before I left the house I accidentally stood on Nate’s phone. I don’t know what came over me, but I had this urge to see if I could find his number—”
“By his I presume you mean Brewer.”
“Yeah. So that’s exactly what I did. I searched his phone and found it, Iz. I found his number.”
“Shit,” she whisper-shouts. “And what? What are you planning on doing?”
“That’s the thing. I have no idea.”
“Oh, please, God. Please tell me you’re not planning on meeting him.”
“If you were in my position, would you not want to meet him? Make a decision on whether he is going to be part of your life or not.”
“Yeah, maybe… if he was a good guy. But from what I’ve heard and what your mom and Nate have said to you about him, he isn’t, is he?”
“But I need to see it for myself.”
Izzy sighs. “I think you need to trust Nate’s judgement on this.”
“But he doesn’t even know I exist. And this means that Hunter is my brother.”
“Maybe get in touch with Hunter. Nate seems to have formed an understanding with him. Maybe he’s the one you should reach out to before putting yourself in the hands of yet another devil biker.”
Laughing, I can’t help but roll my eyes. “Devil biker? Really, Izzy?”
“You know what I mean.” She waves her hand and chuckles to herself as she turns her attention back to the computer screen. I do the same, only, thinking about contacting Hunter makes complete sense.
Reaching for my purse, I pull out my phone and type out a quick text to Nate.
Hey. I’ve been thinking. I’d like to meet up with Hunter. Will you come with me?
Locking the screen, I place it on the desk waiting for his response. Doesn’t take long before the screen lights with his reply.
Sure. Talk later.
Smiling, I push the cell phone back in my purse and feel a little lighter knowing that at least this way, I can get some answers.
“So, I have my OB appointment tomorrow.”
“Shit, I had no idea.” She frowns. “How are you feeling?”
“Positive. They can do a noninvasive blood test. It will give us the answer about paternity. I just want to be excited, you know. Not living in fear that this baby is his.” My voice is a whisper and I see the sympathetic look in her eyes.
“I get it, honey. I’ve been through the same thing, and the thought of carrying that monster’s baby makes my stomach roll.”
“See, I just don’t think anyone gets it. They don’t understand when they haven’t been there.”
“Well, it’s a good job you got me then, isn’t it? Does Nate know? Are you taking him with you?”
“I haven’t told him yet. He came back late last night and crashed on the couch.”
“What, club stuff?”
“I don’t know. I guess so.”
“You have to tell him tonight, Tara. He needs to be by your side at that appointment.”
“I know, I know. I’ll tell him, I will.”