Six years ago

Two damn hours alone in the car with Avery.

Someone kill me now.

I’m doing my best here, to try to keep my mind off the fact that she is sitting incredibly close to me, since her car is so small that it doesn’t really leave much room between us, but being this close to her?

Is pretty damn hard.

As is my dick, which of course, really makes this even harder than it should be.

No pun intended.

When we first got into the car, she chattered away, thanking me endlessly for saving her from the gym. I managed to get a thank you out to her, for dropping her whole damn day, for me, but honestly?

Most of my words got caught in my throat.

No one has ever been this kind to me. Putting my needs first, well above their own.

And dammit all, I’m fairly certain that in this moment, as I sit next to Avery, listening to her sing along to every damn song on the radio, every so often glancing over at me with a smile, and letting her amazing fucking scent intoxicate me?

Well, in this moment, I suddenly know what it’s like to be in love with someone.

And, fuck my life.

Of course, that person would have to be her. The one single person that I absolutely cannot have.

I try to lean back and close my eyes, but it’s impossible. Because like always?

Avery haunts my fucking dreams as well.

How is it, that you can be doing just fine in life, and then you meet one person, one single fucking person, and suddenly, you’re all spun out, and unable to think about anything but them?

That’s how I feel, and that is what Avery has done to me.

“What’s your favorite kind of music?” She breaks the silence, as she speeds along the highway.

“Not sure. It’s hard to pick a favorite, I guess.” I keep my eyes turned towards the window.

“Agree.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see her point to the visor above my head.

“If you want to change what I’m playing, you can grab any of those CD’s. I have a bunch of mixed ones.”

“What you’re playing is fine.”

She simply shrugs.

“Ok. It’s just, this is a road trip, you know? I firmly believe that road trips are only as awesome as the music that you have playing. So, feel free to change it up.”

I continue to keep my eyes focused out of the window, watching as the tree’s and other cars fly by. I let Avery’s sweet voice surround me, as she sings along to every damn song that plays.

And then...the song changes.

And as Avery begins to belt out the words, I can no longer focus on anything but her.

She nails the chorus, before glancing over at me for a second, before she sways slightly to the music as those fucking words leave her sweet lips...

“I don’t see nothing wrong...” She sings before winking at me. “With a little bump and grind...”

She is singing sex music...music that you fuck to...and oh my god.

Hearing that roll off her tongue?

Well, stick a fork in me.

Because I’m done.

My dick begins to throb as it grows, becoming uncomfortably hard in my pants.

I bite my bottom lip hard, trying to pull the focus away from the thoughts of pure sex that this song evokes in me, before finally, scrambling to find a different CD.

“Aww. You don’t like R Kelly?” She pouts, as I pop the CD out and slide another one in.

“He’s alright. You don’t mind if I change it, right?”

“Too late now.” She winks again, before shaking her finger at me. “It’s fine, but next time? At least let me finish my jam.”

I was about to finish myself off...literally, without a single stroke of my dick, inside of my pants.

So fucking way are we ever listening to that song again.

No fucking way.

Red Hot Chili Peppers begins to blast through the speakers, and I settle back against my seat.

Avery continues to sing along, but at least now my mind isn’t focused on pure, raw, hot sex with her. At least, not at the moment.

We don’t speak for the rest of the drive, at least, nothing more than about changing the CD’s. But it’s fine anyhow.

The silence between us allows me to wrap my mind around the fact that I’m about to see my mom for the first time in three months.

And it’s probably going to be one of the last times.

She’s never actually been much of a mother.

The only good thing that she ever did for me, was to manage to stay off drugs while she was pregnant with me.

I wasn’t born addicted to the same shit as her, but after she gave birth to me, it was basically her ticket to being able to go right back to the way she had been before.

She never knew who my dad was, or if she did, she pretended not to. And while when I was younger, she tried to hide her addiction from me, the older I got, the less that she did.

I used to catch her hanging outside of our many slum lord apartments, shooting up with whoever else was around.

I was pretty much always on my own, but honestly, growing up the way that I did only gave me drive. A roaring fire within me to never turn out the way that she had.

I’ve always known that baseball was my ticket out of that life.

One of moms many boyfriends, one of the few who was actually a decent guy, had signed me up for little league when I was maybe six.

I instantly fell in love with the sport. And while I didn’t have many other times on a team, since my mom never had the money to sign me up for one, I still had raw talent.

I worked on my own for a long time, helping myself and coaching myself. When middle school came around, I finally got noticed by some coaches who managed to snag me some used equipment. From there, the rest has been history.

And from where I’m sitting now? Especially since Jack Cooper has taken me in?

A full ride baseball scholarship is so damn close, that I can taste it.

Too bad the only thing that my mind seems to want to focus on tasting these days is Avery.

Fuck.

We pull into the gate for the prison.

I try not to notice the way that her eyes widen as she takes in all the tall fences and barbed wires, or the way she flinches when she sees the guard tower and notices the guns resting out of the windows.

Unable to help myself, I reach for her hand.

“Don’t worry, Ave’s, ok? You’re safe.”

“I know.” She nods, before glancing over at me. “I know that you won’t let anything happen to me.”

She parks the car, before glancing around at all the other people getting out of their cars for visiting day.

“I, ah...” She bites her lip. “I was going to just wait in the car, but...”

“You’re not fucking waiting in the car. As much as I hate to bring you in here? You’re not leaving my side until I find a safe place for you to be.”

I get out of the car, before jogging over to her side. I wrap one arm around her waist, pulling her snugly against me, before leading us up the sidewalk.

I hate how having her this close to me feels so damn right. Like her body was made, just for me, perfectly molded to rest just right against me.

Her hand squeezes my waist, as I lead her through the doors.

“I’m going to have to let go of you while they search us, ok?”

“While they search us?” Her eyes widen.

“Yeah...I mean, they have to make sure we aren’t smuggling anything in to the inmates.”

“Oh, fuck!” Her eyes widen as she pulls back.

“So, I probably should lose the three joints that are stuffed into my bra?”

“What?” I bark, as an officer begins to approach us. I pull her next to me, before bringing my mouth to her ear.

“You seriously stuffed joints into your bra and brought them into prison?” I hiss, panic completely setting in.

“No.” She giggles before pulling back. “Gotcha.”

She pokes me in the stomach before giggling again.

“Wow. You should have seen your face.” She bats her eyes before turning her face up towards mine.

“You were totally freaking out.”

She’s right...she got me. Except, when I look down at her, I can’t help but to let a huge goofy grin flash on my face.

She’s just so damn cute...

“Really cute, babes.” I mutter, ignoring the way her widen at my term of endearment.

“C’mon.” I wrap my arm back around her, pulling her forward until I’m forced to let go and allow us both to be searched.

She’s pulled in a separate direction, towards a female officer, but I keep her within my eyesight at all times.

We’re finally reunited and placed back into the waiting room.

“I’m glad that they didn’t find your stash.” I smirk at her, making her grin.

“Me too. I put them in a special place.”

“Crazy ass.” I mutter, before wrapping my arm around her and pulling her tightly against me. She sighs before allowing herself to rest against me, snuggling her head into the crook of my neck.

A sudden peace falls over me.

Suddenly, I’m no longer focused on the fact that I am here today, pretty much to tell my mother goodbye. In fact, I’m not even dreading it at all.

I feel like everything is right in the world, and it has everything to do with the woman wrapped up in my arms.

She may only be wrapped up in me for safety right now, but I can’t help but to let myself imagine what it would be like to have her like this, every damn day for the rest of my life.

**

I STEP OUT OF THE WAITING room, feeling like a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest.

Avery stands up from her chair, her eyes landing questioningly on mine. I hold out my hand to her, and she takes it, before I lead her out of the doors and towards the car.

“Eric?” She pauses at her door, before glancing up to me. “Are you ok?”

“No.” I exhale slowly, before shaking my head. “But I will be, the second that we get out of here.”

“Ok.” She nods, before climbing into the driver’s seat.

I sink down into my own seat before reclining all the way back and closing my eyes.

Even though I’ve seen my mom in prison before, this time?

Well, this time was really hard.

She’s never looked as bad as she did today. I know that it’s because she’s now locked up, and more than likely out of drugs.

But she barely even wanted to hear about what has been going on with me since she up and left me.

In fact, the only thing that she seemed to be concerned about was whether or not I would be able to deposit any money into her commissary account.

I’m assuming, so that she can buy some things to make trades for drugs.

Mother of the year.

Avery’s quiet for most of the way home, barely even singing along with any of the music playing in the background.

I glance over at her from time to time, only to catch her looking at me too.

Finally, I break the silence.

“Thank you for bringing me today, Avery. I really appreciate what you did.”

“Of course, Eric. That’s what friends are for, right?” I’m flashed one of her gorgeous smiles, the kind that makes her eyes completely light up.

“Yeah. I guess. I’ve just never had friends like that. You know, friends like you.”

“Well now you do.” She reaches over and gives my shoulder a squeeze before turning her attention back to the road.

“So, you still want to learn how to drive a stick?”

“I don’t know if I’m up for it today.”

She simply nods.

“Alright. Maybe another time then.”

“Yeah. Maybe.”

I lean back in my seat, letting the day fade away, as I fall asleep to the sound of her soft voice, wishing like hell that I could be more than her friend.

But that is just not the way it’s supposed to be.

**