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Finding Passion (Colorado Veterans Book 3) by Tiffani Lynn (5)

Valerie

Tonight, I slip on a little black dress that Summer insisted I buy when she was here. At 42 years old I didn’t think wearing something this sexy is a good idea. I think there’s an age limit on wearing this kind of thing. It has spaghetti straps and is way too short, but when I asked my friends from work what to wear tonight they said “LBD,” in unison. So even though I have to keep tugging it down so it’s not indecent, I’m going to wear the little black dress.

When we arrive at Dante’s, an upscale bar with a dance floor, I’m relieved to find mixed clientele. I was afraid I was going to be in a club packed with 20-year-olds and I’d spend the night feeling like someone’s mother. That’s not at all what I want. This place has all types of people and the age range seems to be between 21 and 65. It’s packed, but the ladies lead me through the crowd to a spot near the bar and Rebecca waves at one of the bartenders who winks at her and holds up a finger. Within 15 minutes we’re all drinking and chatting, as much as possible since the DJ has started and it’s loud. The drinks are going down smoothly and for once I’m not being cautious with how many I drink.

We stay in our little area while Rebecca flirts with the bartender—who has been good about keeping our drinks replenished—until Barb is pulled to the dance floor by a good-looking man twice the size of Ron with shoulders like an NFL linebacker.

Now that I’m standing here alone with no distractions I glance around, noting the modern chandeliers in cool geometric shapes, dimmed to create the young upper-class vibe. The bar and furniture—all black and chrome—look sleek and expensive.

While I’m still taking in the decor a young, blond-haired blue-eyed guy approaches me. “Would you like to dance?” he leans in and asks so I can hear him above the music. My first thought is that someone dared him to ask the old lady to dance so I glance around expecting a group of young guys to be looking on and laughing. I don’t see any, but I’m still ready to protest. “Me?” I ask, truly puzzled by his request.

“Yeah you.” His light eyebrows pull down low like he can’t figure out why I didn’t jump on him. Rebecca, who must have pulled her attention from the bartender, smiles when I glance back at her for help and shoves me his way, shouting over the music, “Sure, she’d love to.”

Damn her! As I stumble forward it becomes clear that I’m not tipsy, I’m drunk. I didn’t realize how much I’ve consumed until now. The blond guy catches me with a smile and pulls me in close.

“You okay, gorgeous?”

I giggle because this guy must be desperate if he’s calling someone his mother’s age gorgeous.

“Come on, I’ll hold you up.” He steadies me as he helps me the rest of the way to the dance floor. I’m feeling light and airy, like nothing matters and it’s a nice feeling for a change, so when he pulls me close and starts grinding with me I don’t protest. It’s a little awkward since this guy is clearly still a baby and I’m an old lady, but it’s nice to be held and nice to be looked at like a juicy steak for a change, especially by a handsome man.

After a few minutes, he turns me so that I’m facing away from him and grips my hips to pull me tight against him and despite my feelings that he’s a boy, what’s pressed up against my ass says all man. That makes this scenario more real and me a little uncomfortable. There’s no way I’d go anywhere near this guy’s manhood outside of this dance floor.

Within a minute or two of this new position he steps all the way away from me and I breathe a sigh of relief before I’m pulled up against him again. This time there’s no erection and suddenly his hips are seated so much higher than they were a minute ago. What the heck? I turn around to see what happened and realize that a much larger man is behind me and as my eyes roam their way up the chest of this man I realize it’s none other than Javier Suarez. What the…?

The grin I’m gifted with baffles me further. “I didn’t think you’d mind if I sent the boy home for milk and cookies and took his place.” Still drunk and wholly surprised, I bust out laughing and am rewarded with an even bigger smile behind that beard. “What are you doing here?” I ask.

“Watching you dance with Wonder Boy.”

I scowl at him as he pulls me close and moves us to the beat. “He asked me to dance and I was tired of standing alone so I said yes. I realize that was ridiculous.”

“It’s only ridiculous because he didn’t have a shot.” My eyes jump to his.

What?”

“I thought he was priming you to go home with him, but everyone in this place could see he didn’t have a shot in hell.”

“I think it’s me that didn’t have a shot in hell unless there were no younger women left at the end of the night.”

Bella, don’t make me laugh. A woman like you doesn’t go home with a boy like him.”

“What does a woman like me do?” I laugh a little as I wait for his response. This ought to be good.

“You wait until a man with some promise comes along.” I open my mouth to speak and he takes one hand from my hip and places his finger over my mouth.

“I get that you aren’t looking for anything serious, but you won’t go home with some bozo barely out of diapers. You’re looking for a man who knows his way around the female anatomy and wants to spend a little time showing you that.”

“I…I…Iwell…”

He leans in close to my ear, his warm breath brushing over my skin like a sweet caress, “Bella, your confidence in your body and your mind even after all you’ve been through is beautiful. Don’t start acting like you don’t know what you want. It may not be me that you think can show you a good time in the bedroom. I’m not your type, I get that, but I bet I’m closer to seeing what’s under that sexy-ass dress than Wonder Boy over there.”

I glance back to where the kid went and find him staring daggers at Javier.

He leans in and swipes his tongue across my earlobe, bringing shivers from my toes all the way up. “Yes, definitely closer,” I murmur, not sure if he can hear me above the music. I don’t know if it’s the alcohol, the spicy scent of his cologne, or the way he’s leading my body through this dance, but right about now I’m ready to ride this beast to my bed. I rise on my toes, trying to get close to his mouth, but he’s so tall I’m not close enough and he has to lean down. His breath smells like black licorice and I want to know if he tastes like it too. Pressing my lips to his, I wait for his reaction. Is he going to push me away or show me he knows what he’s doing?

He opens for me slightly, his tongue sliding softly against the seam of my lips and I grant him entrance. The kiss is sultry, yet short, and I’m disappointed that it ends. When he pulls away his mouth glides over to my ear. “You don’t do casual.”

“What makes you think that?” My voice is breathy as I try to bring myself back from the magic kiss.

“I did my digging. I know you better than you think I do.”

It’s time to be bold. I don’t want to be alone tonight and the thought of seeing what’s under his button-down shirt and jeans is more than I can ignore. Tomorrow I’ll probably be sorry, but one night of fun never hurt anyone and Lord knows I could use some fun.

“In this one case, I think you might be mistaken,” I say, hoping to bait him. With both hands, I scrape my fingers through his beard. I’ve never had an interest in beards, never thought much of them. Being in the military I was surrounded by clean-cut men all the time so there wasn’t much fodder for my imagination. I’m surprised when the beard is soft. The hair is a little wiry, but it’s still incredibly soft. His lips part slightly and he licks his lower lip slowly like he’s found something he’s ready to eat.

Bella, you’re making it hard for me to walk away from you.” He flexes against me a little and I can feel the beginning of his interest.

“What if I don’t want you to walk away?”

“Might make things a little difficult when it comes to business.”

“No business tonight. If you aren’t interested I can go back to Wonder Boy over there.” I tip my head in the kid’s direction and Javier scowls before he lowers his head and takes my mouth in a tender yet passionate kiss. His lips are amazing, so full and soft, strong and controlled. I’m not sure I’ve ever been kissed quite like he does. I know taunting him is a bad idea, but I can’t help it. I want the attention he’s promising, want his gigantic hands anywhere and everywhere on my body. I need those lips to find every erogenous zone I have and I need to grab on to those sexy, wide shoulders and dig my nails in.

His voice is husky and warm in my ear as he tells me, “If you really want this you need to tell your friends you’re leaving.” A pulse of excitement shoots through me.

Smiling in triumph, I nod and stumble back through the crowd with Javier on my heels, his hand on the small of my back, to where Rebecca is sitting on a barstool. Her eyes widen as she gets a look at the beast behind me and she passes me another drink, which I slam down without taking a breath. I need a little more liquid courage now that it looks like this will really happen. I want to do this, really want to be with him, but I’m not sure if we should again. I haven’t stopped thinking about the last time. I can’t imagine how I’ll feel adding another memory of him to the list.

Passing the glass back to her I say, “I’m taking off. I’ll see you next week.” She smiles and waves. I turn to Javier and wait. Using his pointer finger to push my hair back behind my ear he leans in and asks, “You sure about this, bella?” It comes out with a heavier-than-usual Spanish accent—Bey-yah—and I can’t help when I melt at the sound of it.

“As long as you are.”

He snags my hand and pulls me through the club, pausing briefly at the coat check to retrieve both coats, and then out the doors. He stops right outside and asks for my keys. Confused, but trusting, I pass them to him and he turns to the valet. “Antonio, meet my friend Valerie.” The college-age man waves at me and smiles at Javier.

“When you get off can you and Angel drop her car off at my place? Put the keys under the mat on the passenger side and text me so I can come out and get them. It’s a maroon Nissan Altima, third row, far left.” I stare at him, stunned. How did he know where my car was and who is this he’s giving my keys to?

“Valerie, this is my cousin. He knows if anything happens to this car he won’t walk next week. You can’t drive it anyway with all you’ve had to drink. At least this way you’ll have it in the morning and won’t worry about it sitting here all night. Okay?”

I nod. How sweet is it that he thought of that? I was so busy freaking out about the prospect of sex, I didn’t even think about my car. I didn’t plan to drive it home since I was drinking, but I love that he thought of it. I have a hundred questions, but I’ll save them for the ride to his place. “Thank you, Antonio.” I smile at the young man. Javier places his hand on my back again and leads me through the parking lot to his truck. Of course, his hand is so big it takes up my whole back, but it’s down low and I’ve never been led like this, except by him, and I have to say that I love it.

Once we’re in the truck and he’s turning onto the street I rest my head against the seat, letting my eyes drift shut but say, “I get the distinct impression you were following me tonight. I thought you were supposed to be following my ex.”

“I don’t need to follow him anymore. We know what he’s up to and we know what Sheila’s up to. I wasn’t really watching you, I just saw you pull in so I decided to stay.”

Really?”

“I watched you for a little while in the beginning of things to make sure Ron didn’t have anyone following you. I only did it long enough to know tonight is not a normal thing for you. Celebrating the good news from today?”

“Absolutely! And you’re right about this not being normal for me. Why did you step in while I was dancing?”

“Because I knew you didn’t want to dance with a boy, but you also didn’t want to stand at the bar any longer.”

“Why are you taking me home with you? I didn’t get the impression you were interested,” I tell him.

“What makes you say that? I think I proved I was more than interested on the dance floor.” When I open my eyes to look at him, the car swims a little and I realize I’ve had a lot more to drink than I’m used to.

“Besides, bella, it’s usually obvious when a woman is interested. That was not the vibe I got from you at all.”

“Probably because I’ve been distracted. Never been with a man with a beard, or long hair, or hands as big as dinner plates. Or one that smells so divine.” I sigh, thinking about what the smell of him did to my libido and allow my mind to move on to his kiss. “And your lips…amazing.”

A deep, warm chuckle comes from him. “Bella, you’re drunk.”

“Yeah, but I never let loose. I never walk on the wild side. Hell, I can’t remember the last time I had fun or felt passionate about anything other than getting Ron out of my life.”

“Passion isn’t hard to find, but you have to be open to it. Are you sure it’s me you want to go home with or just someone?”

“Is that really a question? If it were anyone, it could’ve been Wonder Boy back there; he was still watching when we left the dance floor.”

Mujer, I hate to break it to you, but every man in that room was watching you from the time you walked in the door until I lead you out of there.” The Spanish word for woman makes me feel a little tingly.

Now it’s my turn to laugh. “You’re crazy.”

“Nope, I was observing the entire time so I know. You may be comfortable with yourself, but you have no idea the desire you spark in the men around you. I bet if you gave any of the other doctors at work an indication of interest they’d be clawing to take you out. You wouldn’t be going home with a P.I.”

I open my eyes again and study his profile. He’s way more rugged than anyone I ever thought I’d be going home with, but he’s also genuine and handsome. “I’m going home with whom I’m want to go home with. Doctors have never been my thing. They’re all a bunch of control freaks.”

He glances at me with a lifted eyebrow.

“Yes, I know I’m one of them, but two control freaks in the bedroom at the same time? No thank you.”

He laughs again before we return to silence for the rest of the way. I’m surprised when we pull up to a small log cabin in a neighborhood on the outskirts of town. The homes are spread out and the properties are all covered in trees. It’s beautiful and I bet in the light of day it’s breathtaking. He helps me out of the truck and leads me toward the porch. It’s cooler here for some reason and I shiver slightly. He pulls me in close and the heat from his body warms me instantly. “You should have a longer coat on.”

“I wasn’t cold until I got out of the car here.”

He unlocks the door and leads me inside, turning on a light by the door. As soon as we walk in, we’re in a cozy living room. Log walls with tongue and grove pine floors and ceilings make it more rustic, but there’s a large flat-screen television and newish comfortable furniture covered in dark fabric in the room. To the right is a small dining room table with mail stacked neatly on it. The whole room is open, all parts blending together flawlessly. I love it.

“This is beautiful, Javie,” I tell him.

His smile is back as he tilts his head. “Javie?” he asks with a hint of amusement in his voice.

I feel my face heat. “I’m sorry, that was way too familiar, it just felt natural.”

“It doesn’t bother me. I was just surprised. Please have a seat, bella.” He ushers me to the couch and when I sit he kneels in front of me and removes my high heels. His strong hands rub my feet as he asks, “What can I get you to drink? Wine, water, beer, orange juice?”

“Wine, please.”

“White okay?” I nod and relax back into the comfortable cushions while he grabs our drinks. When he returns and passes me the glass he sits further down the couch and I wonder if he’s changed his mind about bringing me here. Maybe my feet smell or something.

“To an unexpected evening.” His beer bottle taps my wine glass and we both take a drink, watching each other while we do. I survey the line of his thick throat, watching the slight bump of his Adam’s apple rise and fall as he swallows and the crazy urge to lick it is almost unbearable.

Placing his bottle on the end table next to him, he leans over and lifts my feet into his lap and begins rubbing them again. Within minutes I’m a puddle of goo stretched out on his couch. I’m not sure anyone has ever rubbed my feet besides the lady who does my pedicures. To have his strong fingers working them is amazing.

“Be careful, big guy, I might fall in love.”

“I don’t do love, but I do foot rubs,” he replies with a smile.

I giggle and stretch my hands above my head while I relax with my eyes closed, completely into the moment. Damn, this is nice. “Thank you, Javie,” I tell him as he lowers my feet, angling me a little differently. When I open my eyes, I see that his are hooded again, like they were on the dance floor and he’s lowering himself down to the floor on his knees. I wonder what he has in mind.

When his hands slide up the inside of my calves and pause at my thighs, pushing the hem of my dress higher, my lips part and my breath catches. Everything in me ignites. He’s watching me and I get the distinct impression he’s waiting for my go-ahead so I nod slightly and the side of his mouth kicks up a little. His huge hands push the fabric of my dress higher and he’s about to get a view of the black lace bikini panties I’m wearing that I never thought anyone would see again.

With a loose grip, he adjusts my legs so they open to make room for his shoulders, and I feel exposed. For a second, nervous excitement overtakes my stomach. It’s too much, but at the same time, it’s not enough. I want more, but I’m terrified. What if he doesn’t like what he sees? What if he’s been with a bunch of young model-type women and he’s expecting something different? Things have probably changed and shifted down there, especially since I had Thea. My mind is leaving on a runaway train to freak-out town and I can’t seem to stop it.

Thank goodness he seems to know how to redirect the current crazy train my head has taken. Warm breath slips through the fabric of my panties as his mouth hoovers close enough to cause madness, but not close enough to touch. Chills race over my skin and a ball of ache, need and desire pushes to the surface. He nuzzles his nose against my sex and I can feel him inhale. He groans and grips my ass under my dress as he nuzzles me again. “Tan sexy, tan dulce.” So sexy, so sweet. He whispers loud enough for me to hear against my sex.

“Javier,” I beg, my voice coming out husky and strained, uncertain what exactly I’m begging for. He kisses me over the fabric and then tugs the panties down, setting them on the coffee table next to him, and arranges my legs so that I’m open and exposed in a way I don’t think I’ve ever been during a sexual encounter.

His fingers slide through my wet flesh, skimming my most sensitive point until he reaches my opening and slides two fingers gently inside. “Tan mojado.” So wet. My hips lift as his thumb gently grazes my clit and my body sings as he plays me with his fingers. When his movement becomes steady and I’m lifting to meet every gentle thrust of his fingers, a moan slips out and his eyes shift from their work at my pussy to my face. The wicked smile he flashes me must mean he likes what he sees there because his attention stays on my face. He’s so slow and deliberate, building the anticipation as he moves his mouth toward my clit, his fingers still working at a steady pace. Eventually he’s close enough that I can feel the heat of his breath again and the first strong swipe of his tongue has me calling his name.

Patiently he works me, swirling and sucking my sensitive clit in a way that makes me quiver. I lose all rational thought, wrap my thighs around his head and squeeze as my fingers thread into his hair. At this point I don’t think he could escape if he wanted to and before I know it I’m moaning his name uncontrollably as I likely suffocate him with my thigh lock.

My mind and body come down slowly while my legs fall to the side bonelessly, and instead of the breath-starved man I think I’m going to find, I see his beautiful white smile aimed at me, lips still glistening with my arousal.

“Javie, that was…” I can’t finish the thought because I can’t find the right word for it.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it as much as I did.”

“Mmmmm.” Between the alcohol and the mind-bending orgasm, my eyes feel heavy and I yawn.

“Give me a minute to dress you, bella, before you pass out on me.”

“I’m not passing out, give me a minute to recover and I’ll return the favor.” I giggle a little, still feeling both drunk and sated.

“Oh no. That was no favor; it was a gift. You needed it. Now you need sleep.” After wrestling my panties back on me he scoops me into his strong arms and carries me to a huge bedroom toward the back of the house. The decor is feminine and floral, not at all what I’d expect from a man as macho as he is. Standing me back on my feet he reaches behind me and adjusts the covers and urges, “Climb in.”

I stare at him for a minute, trying to understand him.

“I didn’t figure you for a pink flowers kind of guy.”

“This isn’t my room. It’s the room I have for my family to stay in.”

“But it’s big enough to be your room, the master bedroom.”

“I wanted to be prepared. One of the reasons being that I wasn’t sure if I’d eventually be taking care of my abuela or parents so I made two master bedrooms when I built this place. Besides, when I have guests it’s nice for them.”

Now I’m confused and it must show because he runs his knuckles under my chin and asks, “Why are you making that face?”

“You aren’t sleeping with me? Was I that bad? Did I embarrass myself? It’s been so long th

Placing his pointer finger to my lips, he says, “Shush, it was beautiful and sexy and a hundred other things I can’t say out loud, but I won’t fuck you again when you’re this drunk. It doesn’t give you a clear choice and if you end up in my bed, I want to know you chose it for the right reason.”

My eyes drift to the floor. “I was really looking forward to you holding me. I don’t know the last…well, never mind. Thank you, Javier.” I turn and climb into bed, facing away from where I left him standing. I’m embarrassed about the whole thing. I wanted to know how he would feel skin to skin with me, what his sweat-slicked skin would taste like, and if he’s as big in the places I haven’t seen as he is in the ones I have. But more than anything I wanted his strong arms to hold me, for the length of his big body to be pressed to mine and to feel the comfort and strength of another person, even if only for a few hours. I hear him pad out of the room and I’m almost asleep when he says, “Sit up, you need to take off that dress before you ruin it.”

“What are you talking about? I just got comfortable.”

“Tomorrow you’ll be upset you ruined that sexy-ass dress.”

I grumble as I slide the zipper under my arm down and wiggle out of the dress. I should be embarrassed for him to see my old, half-naked body this close, but I’m tired and drunk and a little sad now so I take the T-shirt he offers and slip it on. When I lie down he taps my butt and says, “Scoot over.”

What?”

“Scoot over. I’ll fall off the bed if I try to lie here and I can’t sleep on the other side of the bed.”

I look at him funny. “What do you mean you can’t sleep on the other side of the bed?” I’ve never heard anyone say that before.

“I don’t know why, but it’s a thing so scoot over.”

I consider arguing a little but decide against it since I’m getting what I want even if I had to guilt him into it. Warmth engulfs me as he lines his body up with mine and slips his arm under my neck. When he closes those arms around me and I’m locked tight against him, I’m thankful for the comfort and I drift off before I can utter a word of thanks.

A few hours later I wake up and the musky scent of Javier is directly under my nose. As I move my hand over the soft expanse of skin on his back I realize he’s wearing nothing but boxer briefs. Oddly, he’s on his belly and I’m on my side with my leg and arm thrown over him, my face resting on the outside of his shoulder. I’m practically smothering him with my weight, but he doesn’t seem bothered. The gentle, rhythmic rise and fall of his torso as he breathes lets me know he’s still asleep. I continue to let my fingers explore, goosebumps rising on his skin in the wake of my touch. I know I’ll probably wake him up but I can’t help it. Tracing along his arm, down his back, up his side, over the cheeks of his ass and down between his spread legs to graze his sac my fingers continue to trail. His breathing changes when I dip my fingers below the waistline of his boxer briefs to skim the smooth skin of his muscular ass. I can’t help but grip a handful of it. It’s then he surprises me when he rolls to his back, adjusting me quickly as he goes so I’m sprawled across his torso with all the perfect things lined up. His cock is as hard as a lead pipe between us and I can’t help but grind into it a little bit.

His gravelly voice breaks the silence. “What are you doing? Aren’t you tired?”

“I woke up and liked what was under me so I decided to explore.” His giant hands grip the backs of my thighs and adjust them so they are straddling him and he grips my ass cheeks hard before smacking them simultaneously. A soft moan slips out and I bend down to swipe his nipple with my tongue. When he makes a humming noise low in his throat I trap the little nipple between my teeth and tug lightly. The humming response is louder that time so I repeat the process on the other side. He obviously likes it because his hands knead at my ass impatiently and I smile against his chest.

I sit up and pull the T-shirt above my head, tossing it to the side, and although it’s mostly dark in the room my eyes have adjusted enough that I can see his lips part. One hand moves from my ass around and up to cover my breast and I moan louder as he flicks the hard tip with his calloused thumb. “Javier,” I half whisper, half plead. “More.”

This time both hands take hold of my breasts and tease my sensitive nipples so I rock against him wishing he were in me and we didn’t have this fabric barrier. He double taps my ass quickly, “Grab a condom out of the drawer next to the bed and lose the panties, bella.” I’m quick as I strip and find the foil packet. While I’m doing that I hear his boxers hit the floor next to my feet and I climb back astride him again. Lord, I almost lose it when my bare pussy rests directly against his steely flesh while he opens the condom packet. I scoot back a little so he can slide it on and then I lower myself as slowly as I can on him. He’s so huge, and buried so deep, that it feels like he’s bumping my cervix in this position and I can’t help my groan as I begin a sensual rolling pace on top of him. His hands roam from my ass to my breasts almost as if he can’t decide what he wants to touch more. I continue to ride him steadily harder until my breasts are bouncing with the impact and I’m moaning on each downward fall. “Touch me,” I beg, and as soon as his two fingers touch my clit, every molecule in my body feels like it explodes into a million brilliant pieces. Javier grabs my hips and guides me to keep going, his hips rising and falling as mine do until he finally flexes up and holds me down on him and I can literally feel his cock pulse inside me. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. Absolute bliss. I sprawl on his chest and do my best to catch my breath as his cock softens inside me. Finally, I roll off of him and onto my side. The bed dips as he exits the bed and dips again as he slips in behind me and pulls me against his sweaty body, wrapping me up tight.

“Are you mad I woke you up?” I ask, wondering what he thinks about that. What if he didn’t want to have sex with me again and I caught him off guard or he didn’t want to make me feel bad?

“If anyone ever got mad because they were woken up like that I’d say they’re an asshole who doesn’t deserve your company.” From that one sentence my mind settles immediately and I relax and fall back asleep.