Jal,

I went to go see my father. I'm not going to let him do this to you. I'll talk to you after.

Allie

After the first few words, they all blurred together, and I had to read it several times through before everything made sense. Then I crumpled the piece of paper into a ball and hurled it on the floor.

“Dammit, Allie! What the fuck.” I lifted my face and stared up the ceiling.

She couldn't think this was her fault. Maybe she hadn’t written that she blamed herself, but it still came through loud and clear. She felt like she had to fix it, but this wasn’t about her. It was about her dad and Paisley. Me and Paisley. Kendrick.

That stupid schmuck.

I should be the one driving over there and talking to him. I was tempted to do just that and then plant my fist in Kendrick’s smug face. I still might do it if Allie came back upset.

I checked my phone to see if maybe she had called or texted while I was still sleeping, but she hadn’t. I had no way of knowing when she left. It was almost eleven, and I had just climbed out of bed a few minutes ago. I'd left a message for Mrs. Beck, letting her know that I needed a couple days to try to get some personal matters taken care of, so I'd turned off my alarm, but I'd never expected to sleep so late.

I’d been dreaming about Allie, surrounded by blankets that smelled of her and me and what we’d done together, so it made sense that I would've wanted to stay there, in that dream. Except while I'd been thinking about her, she’d gone off to face that jackass.

I picked up the note and read it again. Then I carefully smoothed out the wrinkles and lines and left it on the counter while I forced myself to make breakfast. Maybe she’d be back soon. Then I could shake her and tell her to quit worrying about this. I’d handle it.

But she wasn’t back by the time I finished cooking. So I made myself eat to have something to do. But I didn't taste much of it.

And she still hadn't returned.

Okay, so I’d shower. Then if she wasn’t back…

“Stop,” I muttered out loud.

She’d be back.

But by the time I’d showered and changed, the apartment was still empty, quiet. Too empty. Too quiet.

How long could it take to talk to that arrogant asshole?

I checked my work email, sending off rote answers, filing what needed to be filed. That managed to kill another hour, but my mind wasn't where it needed to be to do anything truly productive. After a quick call to Adam to see where he thought things stood – it was too soon to tell – I couldn't wait any longer.

I almost headed straight for Kendrick and Diamond's estate, but at the last minute, I took a detour. I'd finally gotten her actual address, and something in my gut told me that she might have felt the need to see her mother after having talked to her father.

As soon as I turned the corner, I caught sight of her, and my heart leaped in my chest. I resisted the impulse to leave my car where it was and go to her. I couldn't completely lose my head. Ten minutes later, I finally nosed into a spot barely bigger than a tuna fish can.

Finally.

Feeling self-conscious, I tried not to think about the people eying me – and my car – as I walked up the block and rounded the corner to where I’d seen Allie. The self-consciousness faded quickly enough because I was already getting frustrated. Why hadn’t she called to tell me she was going to see her mom too?

In a split second, though, self-consciousness, the lingering worry, and even the frustration faded away, replaced by one simple emotion.

Jealousy.

Allie wasn’t alone.

She was with a guy, and after a moment, I realized that I knew him.

The man sitting with her was the same guy who’d come with her to the ball not that long ago. I remembered that his name was Tao, and he’d shook my hand with a smirk on his face.

How long have you been together? I’d asked.

And he’d all but laughed as he said, Forever.

Here I’d been worrying about her going to see her father, and she was getting all cozy with this asshole.

He leaned over to say something to her, the intimacy between them undeniable. He put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek. It wasn't her mouth, but it was damn close.

Jealousy exploded into a blistery rage.

They’d been together forever alright.

Something twisted in me, and it took a few seconds to realize what it was. Hurt.

The anger and jealousy were easy to understand, but the hurt…I’d never felt that before.

I almost stormed over there, ripped her away from him, demanding to know what she was doing with him – doing to me. But one thing stopped me.

I had no right to demand anything of her.

We’d made no commitments to each other.

Not really.

Over the entire course of the time we'd known each other, I'd deceived her, seduced her into sleeping with me when I was engaged, and I couldn't even count the number of times I'd been cruel to her.

Maybe this was what I got for being a self-centered ass.

Maybe I should have walked away then. Maybe I should walk away now.

Before I could decide to do just that, Allie saw me. Her eyes widened, and I backed up, ready to just…disappear. I couldn't be humiliated a second time. Not by someone I actually cared about.

I heard her calling me, but I didn't care. I was opening my car door when she caught up to me.

“Dammit, Jal! Wait!”

Giving her a disinterested look over my shoulder, I asked, “Why?” I managed to shrug even. “It’s not like we owe each other anything.”

“On the contrary.” She stopped and crossed her arms over her chest. “You're about to owe me something. It’s called an apology. Tao and I are friends. He’s my best friend and has been since kindergarten.”

Some part of me wanted to take those words at face value and accept them, but I wasn't an idiot. I'd seen the way they were together.

“I wish I had friends that good,” I said sourly.

“Stop being an ass, Jal,” she snapped.

“You can’t tell me there’s never been anything but friendship between you two.”

She raised an eyebrow. “I never tried to. The term is friends with benefits. Yeah, we’ve slept together. Guys aren’t the only ones who get lonely or go looking for a partner at night, Jal. Girls do it too. Tao and I are sexually compatible, but we’re not in love, not now, not in the past, not ever.”

I snorted. I couldn't look at her, not without thinking about her with him, wondering if she'd compared us, wondering what he'd taught her.

“Don’t you go giving me that look.” She jabbed a finger at me. “Not when I know you've had your fair share of casual sex. Do you have any idea how much easier my life – his life – would have been if the two of us could just fall in love? I wouldn’t have spent the past month going out of my mind over you.”

This time, she poked me in the chest. Hard. I caught her wrist and yanked her toward me, my body instantly responding to the feel of her curves against me. The band around my chest started to ease. “Friends.”

She narrowed her eyes.

“Friends with benefits,” I murmured. “You sleep with him.”

“I’ve slept with him.” She stressed the past tense.

“It stops.” I kissed her hard and fast, needing to claim her, to make sure that she knew I wasn't playing around. That she didn't need a friend with benefits. Ever again.

“Well, yeah.” She rolled her eyes at me. “I thought that was obvious.”

I bent my head to kiss her again, but a movement from just beyond her had me looking up. Tao stood there, leaning against a light post as if he had nothing better to do.

“Don’t mind me,” he said with an infuriating grin.

I couldn’t keep from scowling at him, but he simply laughed. It was an easy sort of laugh, definitely not that smirk I’d seen in his eyes the last time. He approached, holding out a hand.

“Maybe we should try this again,” he said. “I’m Tao. Her best friend. And judging by the look I see on both of your faces, that’s all I am now.”

“Is it?” That snarl in my voice wasn’t anything I’d ever expected to hear from myself.

He laughed again. “Seeing as how you finally pulled your head out of your ass? Yeah.”

This time, he seemed to be laughing at me, but that was okay. I was pretty sure I deserved it.

Tao winked at Allie before shooting a look back over his shoulder. “Babe, you better take him back to meet your mama. She saw you take off running and came out to see what’s up. You know her. I managed to stall her, but it won’t work for long.”

Take me…wait, what?

Fuck me.

Panic seized me, and it only got worse when Allie gave me an appraising look, and she had the same laughing sort of smile on her face that Tao had.

“It has to happen sometime,” she said, her eyes twinkling.

“Sometime? Yeah,” I agreed. “Sure. But does sometime have to be today?”

“What’s the matter?” Allie winked at me and held out her hand. “Are you chicken?”

I pondered the question before I gave her a completely honest answer, “Well, yes. It’s not like I’ve ever done this before.”

“What?” The smile on her face was so bright and happy, so open, I wanted to kiss her again, and not stop. “Meet a girlfriend’s mom?”

I wasn't about to tell her that she was probably the first person I could ever really consider...I let the thought trail off. That small, panicked voice inside me didn’t want me to finish what I'd been thinking, but it came anyway.

I hadn’t ever had a serious relationship with a woman.

That didn’t matter, because up until now, I’d never wanted to have a serious relationship with a woman.

Hell, half the time, I hadn't really even liked the women I'd slept with. Friends with benefits had never been my thing because I didn't really have any female friends.

“Come on, you coward,” Allie said with a teasing grin. She took my hand and tugged me along behind her. As we rounded the corner, I looked up, and a cold sweat broke out across my neck.

Her mother was standing on the porch waiting for us.

At least, I assumed it was her mother.

She looked too young, but there were strong similarities.

Allie came to a stop and tugged her hand free of mine. I almost didn't let it go, but she was insistent. She signed to her mother, speaking out loud as she did so, but whether that was out of habit or for me, I didn't know.

“Mom, this is Jal, the guy I’ve been telling you about.” She smiled at me. “Jal, this is my mom, Malla McCormack.”

For a second, I was so interested in the gestures Allie was making with her hands, I barely heard her words. The signs were fascinating, fluid. Beautiful. I'd caught glimpses of sign language here and there over the years, but I'd never really paid much attention to it, like any other foreign language.

Malla came down the steps, and out of habit, I held out my hand. She shook it while I tried to figure out what I was supposed to do or say next.

Then Malla spoke. I blinked, hoping I didn’t look as confused as I felt I instantly felt like an asshole because I knew being deaf didn’t mean a person couldn’t speak.

“Hello, Jal.” She glanced at Allie, eyebrow arched and I did the same out of habit.

“She’s making sure she’s saying your name right,” Tao said from behind me, nudging me with his shoulder.

Oh.

Years of business training finally kicked in, and I managed a smile. I handled multi-million dollar deals without blinking, I could handle being introduced to a woman’s mother, right?

“Hello, Mrs. McCormack,” I said, squeezing her hand politely before starting to let go.

But she held on.

“You’re not what I expected,” she said, her words a little louder than necessary, but clear and concise.

And her gaze was direct, like she was staring right through me.

I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Finally, I said, “I hope that’s a good thing.”

“So far, it is.” She let my hand go but continued to study me. After a moment, she nodded. “If you hurt my girl, you’re going to regret it.”

I had no doubt that she meant it.

“Hurting her is the last thing I plan on doing,” I said honestly.

She snorted indelicately. “If you two want to make this work, both of you will hurt the other at some point. That’s how relationships work. But there’s hurt…and then there’s hurt. You know which one will make me angry.”

Tao walked past me and slung an arm around Malla’s neck, kissing her cheek. Then he looked at me. “And she’s like the Hulk, my man. Trust me, you won’t like her when she’s angry.”

Allie signed for her mother, and Malla rolled her eyes.

“Idiot child,” she said, shaking her head. Then she turned and headed up the steps. “Why don’t you come inside, Jal? We’re having lunch soon.”

I looked at Allie, silently pleading for her to say that we had to go.

“You're not getting off that easy,” she said as she wrapped her arm around mine. “Consider it your apology.”