Chapter 2

Ella

I had to admit, even though the Harvard dorms were nice and the beds were extremely comfortable, it was wonderful to wake up in my own bed back at home for once. I didn’t have to jump up and run to class, be up at five in the morning to cram for an exam, or worry about what society was having what meeting that day. I could just relax.

I turned over in bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking about the night before. I couldn’t stop remembering the way Will had looked at me when he’d gotten home from his meeting.

I had been cleaning everything up from my and Avery’s launch into the world of board games, trying to make the place less of a wreck before going back home. I wasn’t in any hurry other than to get out of Will’s way, but for some reason I felt like he hadn’t been in any hurry to push me out the door.

Every time I had turned toward him or glanced in his direction, he’d been staring at me with this deep, dark, sexy look in his eyes. It was like he was looking right through my clothes and devouring me with his mind. Normally, something like that would make me uncomfortable, but not with Will. With him, I almost wanted to give him more of a show. It was like he wanted me, and instead of using words, his eyes told the entire story. The way he had bit his bottom lip and gazed at me still sent shivers down my spine. I had liked it a lot.

It had been a long time since anyone had looked at me with that kind of desire. There were relationships to be had in college, but who had time to study, keep their grades up, manage all their Harvard extracurricular activities, and maintain a healthy relationship with someone? I was sure there were people who did it, but I wasn’t one of them. I was going to Harvard to get my degree so I could teach children, and although it wasn’t my first choice of schools, I knew it would keep my father off me for at least a while, especially since I had decided not to go down his path and become a defense attorney. I wanted to help people who deserved it, not rich assholes who got caught breaking the law.

All of that was beside the point. At that moment I was thinking about Will and the fact that it wasn’t the first time he had run through my mind. He had only been our neighbor for a little while, but he and my father had known each other as acquaintances for much longer. I had thought about and crushed on Will for quite a while. In fact, I was the type of girl who found older men to be way more attractive than their younger counterparts. Not only did the masculinity of a strong, older man appeal to me, but the sensitivity and maturity of them did as well. Men my age were still boys trying to make their way through life, looking for a girl who was down with them having whatever freedoms they saw fit. That was not my idea of a relationship. I wanted someone who wanted me as much as I wanted them, someone who cherished me and lusted after me even when other women were around.

As far as Will and my crush on him were concerned, I had never done anything about it. I mean, how could I have? Will had been married for a long time, and he loved his wife so much, which I understood because I remembered her being a lovely lady. Then, when she died, he closed himself off, pushing people away and just doing his own thing with Avery. He mourned her still to this day, which was evident by the pictures on the wall and the fact that no one ever saw a woman at his place—or at least that was the gossip I overheard when my father talked about Will to my mother.

Besides, I was almost ten years younger than him. It didn’t bother me, but I could see how it might bother him. And even if it didn’t bother him directly, the blowback from everyone else might be a huge hindrance to us ever trying to have a relationship. My parents would be the first ones to completely lose their minds, and after that, who knew which people would have an issue with it? Society wasn’t capable of accepting a ten-year age gap, even if I was old enough to make that kind of decision for myself.

I had just turned twenty-one a couple months back, and although I really hadn’t wanted to partake in the ritualistic passage of a person passing from twenty to twenty-one, the girls at school had not taken no for an answer. So, I had gotten dressed up in the traditional bar skank outfit, let them pin ribbons and tiaras to me, and galivanted through town, getting completely wasted at the bar, turning down hungry scavenger men, and passing out facedown in my dorm room, still clothed. It definitely wasn’t one of my more elegant moments at Harvard.

I took a deep breath and shook the embarrassment from my mind before dragging myself out of bed and pulling my robe on. I wandered out into the kitchen and smiled as I found Taryn sitting at the breakfast table, drinking a cup of coffee and reading a book. Taryn was my little sister, and we were both on spring break at the same time. She was really the only reason I made my way back home to New York for my breaks. For spring break especially, most college kids escaped to the islands to party, and most people at Harvard went abroad or sailing on their parents’ yachts. Not me, though. My father didn’t really like boats and my parents were always busy with work, so holidays had never been a big thing in our house—meaning I wasn’t home to celebrate Easter or anything. Usually, if Taryn wasn’t going to be free from the shackles of the academy she went to, I would just stay in Cambridge and get ahead in my classes for the next semester.

Taryn was in her senior year at the academy, and it wouldn’t be long until she was graduating and embarking on her own passage to college. She and I were pretty much twins, from the way we thought about life to the way we looked and the way we acted. I was sure that was why we butted heads so often, but in the end, she was my best friend. We had always been close, and when I went off to college, it had been hard on her.

I sat down at the table and tapped her book, smiling. “Hey there,” I said. “Enjoying not having to think about going to school tomorrow?”

“God yes,” she said. “And thankful that I don’t have to stay up listening to my annoying roommates chatter about stupid boys all night long. They seriously need to grow up.”

“How is the year going?”

“Not fast enough.” She laughed. “But it’s good. I have one more semester to go, and I’m pretty sure I got the valedictorian spot, which makes Dad happy.”

“Of course,” I said, rolling my eyes. “You get to make the famed speech at graduation.”

“Yours was epic.” She smiled. “Of course, I have to try to beat it.”

“Of course,” I said.

“Are you going to make it to my graduation?”

“Uh, I wouldn’t miss it even for a kidney transplant,” I said. “Besides, who would be there to keep Dad under control and stop him from just jumping onstage and chanting ‘Harvard’ over and over again?”

“He hasn’t shut up about it since I got accepted.” She rolled her eyes. “It’s a good thing that’s where I want to go because he wasn’t giving me a choice.”

“Trust me, I completely understand,” I replied. “I’m actually coming in the whole week before your graduation so I can be settled in for the summer.”

“You are my angel,” she said, standing up and walking around to me to wrap her arms around my neck and squeeze. “Seriously, everyone else is all excited about this, and I’m just like, please just let it be over quickly and without incident.”

“Go get dressed,” I said. “Let’s go out to lunch since Mom never puts food in the kitchen unless the cook is here.”

“Perfect. I’m starving.”

We both rushed to get ready, throwing on jeans and T-shirts and then heading out the door before anyone could stop us. We went three blocks over to this little French café we used to go to all the time. It was quaint and secluded, meaning we had our privacy. We ordered lunch and I ordered a bottle of wine, knowing that they knew our father and wouldn’t worry about carding my sister. I handed Taryn a glass of wine and winked while she giggled.

“So, Mom said you babysat Avery last night,” she said, sipping her wine. “How was that? Mom and Dad have been trying to get me to babysit for forever, but we both know I do not like kids and their boogers and germs.”

“It was all right,” I said. “Avery has really grown. We just played board games all night.”

“And?”

“And what?” I asked.

“Don’t act like there isn’t something else on your mind.” She smiled. “You answered short and sweet and then put your head down. Obviously, you’re holding something back.”

“No,” I said, shaking my head. Taryn stared at me with a knowing look on her face. “All right, sheesh. I just really have an enormously massive crush on Will.”

“Will?”

“Yeah. He said to call him Will.” I smiled. “He’s just so handsome and kind, and the way he looks at me drives me absolutely mad. It’s like he wants to rip me apart with his teeth, but in a sexual way, not in a serial-killer way.”

“I’ve known you have on crush for, like, ever,” Taryn said, waving her hand. “Old news.”

“Really? Is it obvious?”

She laughed. “Not to the outside world, but I’m like your twin from a different year.”

I looked at her with blushing cheeks and broke out into laughter along with her. I could never hide anything from this girl. She knew me too well. That was okay, though, because the fact that I was crushing on Will was totally burning a hole in my brain, and I needed to be able to talk about it with someone.

“So, is he seeing anyone?” Taryn asked.

“No,” I said. “I mean, I don’t think so. He seems pretty hung up on his wife’s death still. I mean, I don’t blame him. She was his wife and the mother of his child. I’m not sure what I would do if in his situation.”

“Well, maybe it’s time a sexy young thing like yourself breaks him out of that,” she said, wagging her eyebrows at me.

I scoffed. “I’m almost ten years younger than him.”

“So?” she said. “Age is just a number—unless it’s illegal, but you’re way past the legal age. And maybe it would make your trips home a bit more enjoyable so I can stop begging you to come home.”

I laughed. “Oh, I see. Because you want me home, you’re willing to pimp me out to the highest bidder."

Maybe she was right, though. Maybe this was exactly what I needed.