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Sin of a Woman by Kimberla Lawson Roby (1)

Raven—Pastor Raven Jones Black, that is—scanned the interior of her massive second-floor office, smiled, and strolled closer to the large picture window. But as she gazed down at all the vehicles that were lined up in the church’s parking lot, it was still hard to believe that everything had evolved so quickly. And in such perfect order, too. Yes, having a one-thousand-plus-member congregation was all that she’d hoped for, but she wasn’t sure she’d expected to see her dreams come to pass in only two years. Of course, it hadn’t hurt that nearly two hundred members from her ex-husband’s former church had joined right away. Because had they not, she knew her ministry would have taken a lot longer to build.

Raven gazed around her office again, admiring her espresso-colored Italian leather sofa, matching loveseat, two oversized chairs, CEO-style mahogany desk, and executive chair. When they’d first purchased New Vision Christian Center and had moved into the building six months ago, the pastor’s study had been only half the size it was now. But the more folks had joined the congregation and paid tithes and offerings on a regular basis, the more upgrades Raven had been able to make—both at the church and for herself. From tearing out a wall and doubling the size of her office to clearing out her closet at home and stepping up her wardrobe game, she’d made lots of changes for the better. To tell the truth, she’d always dressed in expensive clothing, even when she’d been married to that awful ex-husband of hers, Pastor Dillon Whitfield Black. But today she only wore suits that came from some of the highest-end stores people shopped at. In fact, the couture-style fuchsia jacket and skirt she wore now had come from Bergdorf Goodman in New York. She didn’t get the opportunity to shop there often, what with her residing in Mitchell, Illinois, but whenever she did fly to New York for a ministry engagement, she never left before spending at least a little time at Bergdorf, Barneys, or Saks’s flagship location. She did the same thing at the Neiman Marcus flagship store when she visited Dallas, and although some people might not understand her great desire to live well and have the best of everything, she knew it was only because they didn’t know her story. Her childhood horror story. Her reason for deciding early on that when she became an adult, she would never go without any of the things she wanted, not if she could help it.

What was so amazing, though, was that regardless of how great her life seemed to be going, she still reflected on her blemished past. She certainly didn’t want to, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t forget about her very public and very nasty divorce from Dillon. She couldn’t pretend she hadn’t spent time in prison for stealing a hundred thousand dollars from her former father-in-law, Reverend Curtis Black. She couldn’t dismiss the fact that she’d once struggled with a very serious gambling addiction.

She hadn’t even known Dillon back when she’d worked as CFO for his father’s church, and now, she regretted the day she’d contacted him. But when she’d heard about the fallout between him and his dad, she’d decided to reach out to Dillon, letting him know that she understood his pain and that she could help him build a much larger church than the one Pastor Black had founded. This, of course, had secured Dillon’s undivided attention, and not long after she’d been released from prison, they’d begun seeing each other and had gotten married. Raven had truly loved him, too, and she could tell he’d loved her—at least for a while. But then greed and power had become a lot more important to Dillon, and he’d commenced having an affair with another woman. And then a second one.

But of course, when Raven had lied and told Dillon that God had called her into the ministry and that she wanted to be named co-pastor, he hadn’t liked it. He hadn’t shared his feelings with her straight out, but she could easily tell that he wasn’t happy. What he’d wanted instead was to continue running things all on his own, even though she’d always been the true brains behind the ministry. She’d taught him everything she knew, including all that she’d learned while working for his father, but Dillon hadn’t cared about her love, commitment, and loyalty to him. So finally, when Raven had demanded that she be named not only co-pastor but also co-founder, Dillon’s church had suddenly caught on fire and burned to the ground. Raven couldn’t prove it, and thus far neither had the fire marshal, but she knew Dillon was the guilty party. There was no doubt in her mind that the sole reason he’d destroyed the church was because he would rather have no church at all than to have to share control of it with anyone. Although there was another reason, too, for his resorting to such drastic measures. If he hadn’t burned down the church and had still refused to give Raven what she wanted, he’d known she was going to circulate that salacious sex tape she’d gotten possession of—the video that his first mistress, Porsha Harrington, had secretly recorded of the two of them and given Raven a copy of.

Raven shook her head and half laughed because who would’ve guessed that she and that same Porsha Harrington would become fast friends, and that Porsha was now NVCC’s associate minister? Who in their wildest imagination would have foreseen the fact that Porsha would join forces with Raven by investing $250,000 for the ministry’s start-up funding? Because it certainly wasn’t the most common sort of thing, personally or professionally, that might happen between a wife and the woman who’d had an affair with her husband.

But with Raven and Porsha it had happened, and they were both benefitting greatly.

Raven left the window to sit behind her desk, but just as she did, someone knocked on her door.

“Yes, come in.”

Porsha walked inside. She wore a black St. John suit that Raven hadn’t seen before, and while it looked good on her, it wasn’t nearly as nice as the black one Raven had purchased a few months ago.

“I know you’re preparing for your sermon, so this will only take a minute,” Porsha said.

“No, you’re fine. Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s great, but I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and God has been leading me toward being a little more active on Sunday mornings than I have been.”

Raven wasn’t sure she liked the sound of this, but she didn’t show her apprehension. “Really?”

“Yes, so what I’ve decided to do is begin saying a few words to the congregation, right after praise and worship service. It would be just before you enter the sanctuary.”

Porsha had spoken to the congregation many times before, and sometimes she even delivered the sermon if Raven was out of town, so Raven wondered why she’d specifically come to tell her about it today.

“You’ve done that before, and I think it’s a great idea.”

“Well, the only difference now is that I’m going to be doing it every Sunday. I’ll be giving a short inspirational message, and I’d like to have this new segment printed in the weekly program. You know, make it a normal part of our service. But more than anything, I wanted to make sure you don’t have any objections.”

Raven couldn’t say what she wanted to say, but of course she did have objections. Still, she smiled and said, “No, not at all, and will you be speaking for a certain amount of time?”

“Not more than five to seven minutes. It really will be brief, and it won’t infringe on any of your sermons. I just want to say something that will encourage our members, right before you deliver your message. I mean, you already give them everything they need, but again, I believe God wants me to do this.”

Raven smiled again but secretly cringed on the inside. “Not a problem. I think it’ll be fine.”

“I’m glad you’re okay with it, and since praise and worship is just about over I’d better get going. I’ll see you out there shortly.”

Raven watched Porsha leave her office and shut the door behind her. This was so not the kind of news Raven wanted to hear, and more and more she wished she’d borrowed that $250,000 from a bank instead of accepting it as an investment from Porsha. Porsha’s offer had seemed like a real blessing at the time, though, and Raven had seen no reason to take out a loan with interest when she had someone willing to invest the entire start-up capital. Not to mention, Porsha had agreed to a very nice deal. She’d only wanted one-half of her investment back, and that wasn’t until the ministry had begun bringing in enough money to cover all expenses and pay the two of them more than ten thousand dollars per month. She then wanted to continue receiving 50 percent of all proceeds minus all expenses. They were very careful not to use the word profit out loud since they were referring to church income, but they’d also figured out a legal way to compensate themselves with healthy salaries. They did so by taking a percentage of what was actually considered profit on each previous month’s financial statement.

In the beginning, they’d each earned about eight thousand a month, but by the start of year two, the ministry had grown tremendously, particularly because of Raven’s online contributors, and they now each received checks for just over fifty thousand dollars—every single month. Porsha was already wealthy and didn’t need the money the way Raven did, but Raven was ecstatic to be earning more than a half million dollars annually from the ministry. This also didn’t include the generous honorariums she received when she gave sermons at various churches and large religious conferences. She was doing exceptionally well, but this new idea from Minister Harrington made her a bit nervous. Especially since, as of late, Porsha had been offering opinions and unasked-for advice much more than usual. She’d begun suggesting lots of new programs and other planning points that she expected to be incorporated. It was true that Raven was the sole founder of the ministry, but again, Porsha had invested the initial dollars and felt as though she had the right to offer input and make crucial decisions. Thus far, Raven and Porsha hadn’t had any major disagreements, but for the last several months Raven had noticed a few looming in the background. As a matter of fact, the only reason they likely hadn’t exchanged angry words was because Raven had purposely held her tongue to keep peace between them. She hadn’t wanted to make any waves and cause problems for the ministry, and she hoped that this could continue to be the case. And it would as long as Porsha didn’t try to control Raven or interrupt the way she ran NVCC.

Raven leaned back in her chair and sighed, but now someone else knocked on her door.

“Come in.”

Michelle, Raven’s assistant, walked in. “It took me a little longer than I thought, but here’s your revised copy.”

Raven reached for her sermon notes. “Thank you so much, Michelle. I know I always have last-minute changes, and I’m not sure what we would do without you. Porsha and I really appreciate everything you do for us.”

“I love working for both of you. It’s really a joy for me.”

“Well, thank you again.”

“Okay then, if you don’t need anything else I’m going to head out to the sanctuary.”

“No, I think I’m good to go.”

Michelle smiled. “You’re always so prepared anyway, but I still wanted to ask.”

“I feel like I have to be. Not everyone believes a woman should be senior pastor of a church, and some don’t feel a woman is capable of being a minister at all. So that’s why, from the very beginning, I’ve always done the same thing. I begin writing my sermons on Thursdays, I review and edit them on Fridays, and then I verbally practice them on Saturday evenings. I also practice once more on Sunday mornings before I get dressed.”

“I knew you wrote them on Thursday and practiced on Saturday, but I didn’t know you practiced on Sunday morning as well.”

“Yes, but again, it’s mostly because I feel like I have to.”

“Well, you always do an amazing job.”

“I appreciate that.”

“Okay, I’m heading out now, but I’ll see you soon.”

Raven smiled again, and Michelle left on her way. She truly was the best executive assistant ever. She was precise and knowledgeable, and she went over and above to get things right. She’d only been working for Raven and Porsha for six months, but she’d attended New Vision for more than a year. She also wasn’t your normal executive assistant, as she’d completed a double major in college in marketing and finance, and she was now working on her MBA through an online university program. Not many MBA candidates would even consider working as an assistant, but Raven knew it had been important for them to hire someone who had clerical skills and so much more. What they’d needed was someone who could speak for them when they weren’t available and keep them abreast of anything new, business- and social media–wise. It was the reason they paid Michelle accordingly, to the tune of eighty thousand dollars per year. Although, in all honesty, it was mostly Raven who Michelle worked for. She handled a few items for Porsha, but it wasn’t daily or even weekly, because Porsha didn’t have nearly as much going on as Raven.

Raven flipped through her pages of notes one last time and took a deep breath. She closed her eyes as she prepared to calm her thinking so she could meditate. At first, her thoughts wandered back to Porsha and this new weekly message she wanted to deliver. But in a matter of seconds she pushed Porsha and everything else from her mind. She sat quietly, taking more deep breaths, in and out, praying and waiting until it was time to leave her office—and hoping that more people joined the congregation today, and that NVCC received more tithes and offerings than ever.