18
Faye
“T
hat was a great rehearsal today guys,” Annie, the girl playing Juliet, declared as she flicked her hair over her shoulder. “I think this is going to be our best performance yet. I am loving the way that we are bringing Romeo and Juliet to life. The characters are taking great shape.”
I felt anxious every time I walked up onto the stage to practice playing the nurse, but since no one seemed particularly disappointed in me I had to assume that I was doing an okay job. I liked the feeling of performing, it gave me a glow that I didn’t even know my life was missing. Stepping into someone else’s shoes and becoming a character was a whole lot of fun, no wonder I used to love this.
For all the bad that Angelo did, and I still wasn’t talking to him, even a week after he showed up at my room to put the tin hat on what had already been the worst night of my life, I was still grateful to him for this. Yes, that was way back when he was still trying to charm me into getting in bed with him, which sucked because it meant it was all false, but at least it wasn’t all a waste. I liked being on this side of the camera and I felt like it was something I would do more of.
“Yeah I agree.” Romeo, or Iain, came up from behind me, making me blush. He was handsome, in a different way to the football guys, and he had a great charisma too. We didn’t share any chemistry or anything, but I always ended up a little tongue tied around him. “We’re all working well together.”
I wanted to make an insightful comment too, I even parted my lips to do so, but before I could we were all distracted by a rumbling and yelling in the hallway. We all turned in confusion to see.
“Where’s Faye?” a familiar sounding voice finally burst into the room, making my heart sink. “I need to speak to her right now. I don’t care if you’re doing some dumb ass play. What, do you think acting is important? Do you think anyone cares about what you lot are doing? It’s all just pointless.”
That made me feel a bit ill. I had seen some of Kevin’s nasty side quite a few times now which put me off him completely. I couldn’t believe that I’d ever liked him to be honest, I must have been so into him that I didn’t see his very obvious faults. I really didn’t want any of his drama here.
“Kevin.” I raced away from the others, hoping and praying that they wouldn’t judge me for this. “Let’s get out of here so we can discuss… whatever you issue is today, somewhere more private.”
“Three hundred views!” he exploded, throwing his hands up in despair. “That’s nothing.”
“Erm…” I glanced behind me to see everyone staring. Of course they were, I would be too if I were them. “Three hundred views isn’t bad for the first day, you know? I don’t think you need to…”
“Oh, that’s good is it? What about Angelo? He’s got thousands.”
I cringed, knowing that there was no way that this conversation would end well. He had as much of an issue with Angelo as I did, but for a very different reason. He seemed to be incredibly jealous of him, which more often than not he took out on me. It was almost as if he knew that we’d slept together. Maybe he did, maybe my sexual conquest had been part of the locker room talk…
Nope, I couldn’t get lost in that train of thought, I would end up having a panic attack.
“Can we please take this elsewhere?” I begged. “I don’t think this is a chat that either of us want to have in public.” I gave him a pleading look, but it didn’t seem to get through to him at all.
“Are you afraid that your sad drama mates will hear?” he sneered spitefully. “Well I’ve got news for you, I don’t think they like you anyway because you’re shit at acting. I saw some of your rehearsal and you were terrible. I’ve never seen anything so pathetic in my entire life.”
I wanted to give back a witty retort, but nothing came out. Kevin had just said the one thing I feared most and now all the confidence that I’d built up ebbed away. I wasn’t the experienced actor here, I probably did suck. Maybe everyone else was humoring me and bitching behind my back.
“No you shut it,” Annie leapt to my defense. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. We all love Faye, you’re just saying that to be nasty.” She wrapped her arm around me protectively. “Now get out of here you meat head. Go and toss a ball around or whatever it is that you do.”
They glared at one another in the most horrific stand off I’d ever been stuck in the middle of. I wanted to say something to crack the ice cold atmosphere, but I couldn’t seem to think of anything. I leaned into Annie, thanking her with my body language since I couldn’t find the words, but I did know that I was still going to have to go with Kevin. Unfortunately, I needed to keep him happy.
It won’t be for much longer, I tried my hardest to reassure myself. Then I’ll be with someone else.
Although that didn’t fill me with much confidence since I hadn’t had any luck with either of the guys I’d worked with so far. Maybe it would be a case of third time lucky and I’d finally get it right.
“Kevin, let’s go and do some more filming,” I said wearily. “And this time, listen to me. There are reasons why you aren’t getting as many hits and I can give you some advice.”
“The reason is your shitty work. Your terrible camera angles, the boring stuff you film, and the way that you edit things. Maybe I need to sit with you through that process to ensure that what I want gets in.” I rolled my eyes and turned my back to him while I tried to keep it together. The idea of more time with him was absolutely killer. “I need to make sure you put me in the right light.”
“Sure,” I replied through gritted teeth. “If you’d rather do that than listen to me, then fine.”
“Are you okay?” Annie asked me quietly, actually looking concerned. I had a feeling that she would end up another person to add to my friend list. “Do you need me to do anything?”
“I know how to handle Kevin,” I reassured her. “He’ll be fine once I’ve calmed him down.”
“He’s not, like, your boyfriend..” She screwed up her nose at the idea. “…is he?”
I let out a throaty chuckle. Once upon a time I really wanted him to be, but not now. His mood swings and bad ego made me miss the easy comradery that I shared with Angelo. Yes, it was fake, but it had been fun at the time. I always enjoyed my time with him. If only Kevin was more like that.
We left the drama studio at last and walked to the canteen. There I sat for half an hour sipping coffee while Kevin explained to me in no uncertain terms that I was terrible at my job. I took it all on the chin, ignoring every single insult because I knew that it wasn’t really about me. He could call me a shit actress, he could tell me that I didn’t know how to record, he could say whatever he wanted and I didn’t care. He was jealous of Angelo and upset because no one wanted to see him being petty, he wasn’t giving people a behind the scenes look at his life, he continued to be fake and that showed.
Well, that was up to him. I’d warned him more than once about it.
Eventually, just like I knew he would, he ran out of steam. He threw everything that he could my way and when it didn’t get a reaction, there was only so far that he could go with it. As he fell into silence, I lifted up my head, jutted out my chin, and gave him a defiant look.
“What do you want to do now then?” I asked him firmly. “You’ve given me a lot of problems, now it’s time to come up with some solutions. How do you want to make this better?”
He crossed his arms over his chest and let his angry eyes flash at me. “That’s supposed to be your job, isn’t it? That’s why Dimitri hired you, to make this bullshit work.”
I gave him a one shouldered shrug and dug the knife in. I knew that I was playing with fire, but I had to say something to ignite him in the right way… I hoped. “Angelo always came up with his own ideas,” I said innocently. “I think that’s why he got so many views. And he still gets them now…”
“Oh fucking hell, well let’s go and do some footage of me exercising then. You can do like an eighties movie montage with me saying stuff over the top. Motivational stuff, what do you think?”
Urgh, that idea was so cringey it made me want to weep, but I was done helping Kevin. If that was his plan then so be it. “Fine, but maybe do an interview over the top instead.”
“Whatever,” he replied sulkily. When he did that he looked like a child, which wasn’t an attractive feature at all. “Let’s go and do it now. I need to have a run to get rid of my rage.”
“I’ll meet you out on the track then, I need to go and get my camera.”
As I left Kevin, I almost burst into laughter at his ridiculousness. How had I not seen that awful side to him earlier? It disgusted me how much I fantasied over that idiot man child. Well, never again. I was done with football boys. College guys too. I figured it was best to leave any sort of romance until I was done here and out into the real world. Yes, I still had another year left after this one, but in the grand scheme of things that wasn’t too long. A year out of my whole life was nothing.
“Hey, Tia,” I exploded happily as I burst into the room. “Guess what I’m about to do? Film an eighties exercise montage with Kevin. Can you believe it? He actually thinks this will help him.”
“Wow, what a goon. I think Rhiannon is wrong about you and him. I don’t think you’re going to end up with him at all,” Tia cried out. “Surely you have better taste than that! I mean, he’s cute but now we all know what he’s like and it isn’t a good look on anyone.”
“Definitely not,” I reassured my roommate. “There is nothing between me Kevin now. There’s no chance of me ever going near him again. I can’t wait to be away from him now. It’s mad to think that I was ever excited to be working with him.” I chuckled at myself. “How little I knew.”
That applied to many things, but I was doing what I could to not keep looking backwards. Every so often I would find myself thinking about Angelo and how things had gone down between us, and I didn’t like it at all. I couldn’t remember being used, it would send me down the same hole that Tyler did. I had to forget about it now and continue moving forwards. Soon I would be done with all of this and I would barely be able to even remember it.