Chapter Thirteen
For the next couple of weeks, Mallory acted like nothing had happened the night the Cardinals won the World Series. I let her. She curled back into her cocoon almost completely. We didn’t discuss baseball. We didn’t really hang out like we had been, either. During our tutoring sessions, we focused on the twenty-page paper I had to turn in to make up for the missing work, low grades, and stupid participation points. I swore Dr. Monroe was the only prof who actually tracked that shit.
The best thing that could’ve happened was the visit to the doctor. My recovery was now ahead of schedule. After all the setbacks, the doubts, staying off it the extra week made a world of difference. Four weeks of physical therapy, and it was over. Angela wasn’t going to torture me anymore, but I had to keep up a prescribed regimen through the athletic department. The rest was up to me. Well, and Seth’s help. As much as I hated the needles, it helped. I’d be able to play sooner. Maybe not at the beginning of the season, but in enough time for the scouts to see me.
Barry was more disappointed than I expected. He’d finally found his calling, at least. My knee wasn’t 100 percent yet, and it probably wouldn’t be for a while. I just needed to keep up the boost through the end of November to be ready for training next semester. I felt stronger every day, and my knee was improving better than I had hoped.
The Tuesday before Thanksgiving, I finally broke the new, silently enforced “no personal talk” rule.
“What’re you doing for Thanksgiving?” I asked as Mallory marked over the latest draft of my paper with a purple pen.
Her head shot up, and the deep crease returned between her eyebrows. That wasn’t good. She shrugged, going back to my paper. I waited until we were in the elevator to bring it up again. This time I welcomed the lift’s screeching halt between the second and third floors.
“I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry,” I said as I leaned against the wall opposite her.
She kept her eyes forward, and her body held the same tension it had for the last few weeks. I hadn’t seen relaxed Mallory since before the game. “You didn’t do anything, Aaron.”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “Friends don’t lie to each other.” The elevator shuddered as it lurched downward. I waited until we were past the second floor before I hit below the belt. “But I guess you don’t want to be friends anymore.”
She reached in front of me and slapped her palm on the stop button, bringing the car to another halt. “That’s bullshit.”
Anger. An emotion I didn’t think she had. I raised my eyebrows, knowing it would antagonize her. “Really? That’s not how it feels. You’re shutting me out again. You have since—”
She slumped against the back wall. “I know. I’m sorry. I just…”
Her anger might have disappeared in an instant, but mine flared. I slammed my fist into the button for the lobby a half a floor away. For once, it eased into its descent. “Of course you are. Protect yourself, Mallory. No matter who it hurts.”
“I’m not protecting myself, I’m protecting you.” Her voice was so calm, so clear, I had no doubt she believed that.
“I don’t need you to protect me,” I said as I lifted her chin. “Whatever you’re hiding from, I can handle it. Just let me in.”
The doors conveniently opened, and Mallory bolted out of the library in a sprint. I debated about going after her. What could I say?
I didn’t need anything from her but her trust. And that was something she wasn’t willing to give easily.
I’d been lying in my bed, staring at the ceiling when a light knock interrupted my pity party. Weighing my options to either ignore it or answer it, I caved to another light rap and forced myself to the door. A little bubble of hope grew when I thought it could’ve been Mallory.
Nope. Should’ve known better.
Trish stared at me with wide eyes. I knew this look. She wanted something only I could offer. After we first broke up, I shredded through every memory we shared, searching for signs that she wasn’t into me. When I looked for them, they were pretty obvious. Playing on her cell during baseball games, flirting with other guys in front of me, disappearing during school dances for longer than it really takes to use the restroom. Yeah, there were good times, but those were early on. We’d grown apart, grown up, and changed. It wasn’t just Trish who had changed. I had, too.
I blocked the door so she wouldn’t just barge into my room. “Can I come in?” she asked.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
She chewed on her bottom lip and bent her head down, gazing at me through her lashes. A few months ago, I would’ve fallen to my knees to give her what she wanted.
“Why are you here?” When she didn’t answer, I started to close the door in her face, but she caught it with her hand.
“What, did your little princess dump you already?” she sneered. I glared back. She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for.”
“Yeah, it was.”
“Look, I need a favor.” When I didn’t bother to respond, she launched into one of her no-breathe, nonstop explanations. “I need a ride back home. I never told my parents we split, and they are expecting you to stop by, and I wish we could at least fake our way through the holiday. I promise I will tell them, but not yet, and I really, really need you to do this for me.”
I crossed my arms. “Why haven’t you told them?”
Trish huffed out a sigh. “Because I can’t stand to hear them tell me how disappointed they are. Again. You know how it is. You know how pissed Dad was when I told him I wanted to major in secondary ed. You know how furious Mom was when she…caught us fooling around in the barn. Which was my fault, of course. Everything I’ve done has been a failure in their eyes. Except you. You they love.”
Staring over her head at the door across the hall, I pretended to contemplate the idea. Trish’s parents were hard on her. Our relationship became clearer, too. She’d stayed with me because of them, not because she wanted me. It didn’t hurt anymore. That was over. It just made me sad for her. But she needed to tell her folks the truth—I couldn’t do it for her. “I’ve thought about it. Answer’s no.”
Then Bitch Trish came back with a vengeance. “After everything we’ve been through and you won’t even fake it for this weekend?”
I leaned down so we were nose-to-nose. “You were faking it for years, Trish. Maybe it’s time you stopped.”
“You son of a bitch,” she snapped, slapping me hard across the cheek.
I would never hit a woman, but it took every ounce of my control not to slap her back. Rage boiled through every pore. She stared at me, smug, knowing I wouldn’t touch her. I hated myself for wanting to wring that look off her face. I hated myself for being a colossal dick to her, too, and I struggled to control the wrath surging through me. My fists clenched, digging my nails into my skin, which was not an easy task, since they were bitten down to the quick. I ground my jaw tight and pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth.
“You think you’re so fucking superior to everyone else when you’re just a scared little boy who can’t think past being exactly like his daddy.” Each word was punctuated with a finger to the chest. “Grow some balls, Aaron. You’re going to need them someday.”
She spun on her heel and stomped down the hall. I stayed in the doorway, forcing the anger out of my body using a trick, ironically, Trish had taught me when she went through a new-age kick last year.
Then I realized what she said.
Grow some balls, Aaron.
The laughter bubbled from deep in my gut until it was loud enough that a few of the guys on my floor finally looked out to see what was going on.
“You okay, Aaron?” Seth shouted from a few doors down.
That only made it worse. When I could breathe, I yelled, “Never been better.”
“Glad to hear you’ve grown some balls,” he shouted back, causing the rest of the guys to join in my hilarity. The door to the hall slammed, making us laugh harder.
“Need anything?” Seth nodded to his room. I shook my head. He’d stocked me just last week. “Let me know.”
Turning around, I let the door close with a soft click. Trish had no idea how much I had changed since she freed me. I stood up for myself. She just didn’t like that I’d done it with her. She didn’t like that she’d lost the one guy she could control, and there was no way in hell he was coming back anytime soon.