Chapter Twenty-Two
My knuckles barely touched her door before she pulled it open. Most of Mallory’s hair was pinned back with wisps of curls escaping her hair tie and framing her angelic face. A light pink gloss covered her lips, making me want to spend the evening worshipping them. My mouth fell open. When I glanced down at her clothes, my heart sunk. She had on a pink sweater I’d seen before and jeans. Definitely not celebrating in style.
I, on the other hand, was wearing a black shirt with varying sized white and gray pinstripes Chelsea bought me before school started. I didn’t think I’d ever have a reason to wear it, so I stuck it in the back of my closet until tonight. My black cowboy boots shined after a good scrub that almost made me late.
“Ready?” I asked, trying not to let my disappointment show. It shouldn’t bother me, but Mallory and I had never had a real date. Classes, her jobs, my training, finals, and other shit kept getting in our way.
“Where’re we going?” Mallory locked her door and pulled her black peacoat tighter around her waist.
“O’Malley’s. Is that okay?”
She waited until we were in the truck before answering. I fired up the engine, the heater kicking it into full gear. Mallory rubbed her hands together in front of the vent.
“O’Malley’s sounds fine,” she said.
If it wasn’t for the cold air, I would’ve thought she’d answered through gritted teeth. Besides, what did she expect? I’d told her to dress to define the night. Obviously she just wanted to hang out. We’d have to put off our first official date until later. That didn’t sit well in my stomach.
We didn’t talk on our way toward O’Malley’s, but I was fine with that. One of the things I loved about Mallory was her silence. She didn’t need to fill up the quiet with unnecessary noise. It was nice. Peaceful. Until I started to feel the tension roll off her. By the time I’d parked, I felt like it was pushing me out the door.
“What?” I asked, not bothering to shut off the engine.
She turned toward me, her jaw clenched so tight she could crack walnuts.
My hands slid off the steering wheel, and my skull slapped against the headrest. “God, Mallory, if you don’t tell me what I did wrong this time, I’m going to develop a complex.”
“Why does it feel like you’re mad at me?” Her words were sharp, and I honestly didn’t know how to answer.
I opted for the truth. It hadn’t failed me yet. “You know how I feel about you.” I sighed and laid all my cards on the table. “I wanted us to celebrate tonight as a couple. On a real date. It feels more like we’re just hanging out.”
“Is that what you think I want? To just hang out?” Her sweet voice set my body into attention.
I turned my head, not expecting her to be so close. “I don’t know what you want, love. I only know what I can give you.”
She rested her head beside mine. “What’s that?”
“Everything.”
Mallory reached forward and pressed her hand against my face. “I kinda thought we were celebrating something.”
“We are.” I covered her hand with mine and pulled her palm to my lips. “We can go somewhere else.”
Mallory watched our hands. “Why did you think I just wanted to hang out?”
“I told you to dress to define our plans.”
She pulled her hand from mine. “And?”
I missed her touch already. “You wore that sweater last Wednesday, and you wear those jeans almost every day.” I reached out and let one of her loose curls slide through my fingers. “You look gorgeous as always, but I figured you’d…” How could I finish that sentence?
“One, you didn’t give me a lot of time to change, Aaron.” Mallory pressed her knee against my thigh. “And two, I’m impressed you remember this sweater.”
My fingers trailed along her jaw. We never broke eye contact as I slipped my hand behind her neck and tugged her toward me. Our lips met, and the fire that consumed me could melt the polar icecaps. I wanted to devour her, but that wasn’t what Mallory needed. She set the pace, and the kiss ended much too soon. My fingers massaged her neck, and I wanted to bring us back together so much that each muscle in my body fought against my brain. Every kiss with her left me wanting more.
“Do you want to go somewhere else?” I whispered. Please say yes.
“No, here’s fine.” She leaned away from me and smiled. A light blush covered her cheeks and matched her sweater. God, she was the most beautiful creature on the planet. “Let’s get inside so you can tell me why I’m fired.”
I laughed and opened my door. The cold air wasn’t enough to tame the blaze she set off in me, but I’d suffer. Mallory opened the truck door before I could get around and do it for her.
“Let me treat you like a lady.” I reached down and linked her arm through mine. She squeezed in to my side.
When we got to the front door, she let me hold it open for her. The place was more packed than a usual Tuesday night. The student population at Westland celebrated finals like Mardi Gras in the French Quarter. Barry and Chuck sat with Candy and Hailey near the front windows.
“Betts, get your ass over here,” Chuck screamed above the din.
I shook my head, but Mallory pulled me toward them.
She glanced up at me and shrugged. “We’re not going to get a table anytime soon.”
I stopped and she spun into me. “Not much of a first date, though.”
“Let’s say this is a pre-first-date date.” She raised her eyebrows, a grin curving her lips. “We can call a do-over, too, if you want.”
I wrapped my arms around her waist and lifted her off the floor until we were eye to eye. “I want you to be happy, Mallory. If you want to leave, we leave. If you want to be tortured and abused by Barry and Chuck, well…don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Mallory smiled and slapped my shoulder. I set her down and took her hand, weaving us through the crowd toward their table. Chuck raised his glass when we joined them and swallowed half of his beer in one gulp. Barry did the same, then both of them started laughing. I knew this routine. Whenever any of the guys on the team showed up with a girl they’d been after, everyone else did the “seal the deal” salute. I used to think it was stupid, but I appreciated the gesture. They knew how much I wanted Mallory and were happy I’d finally gotten more out of her than a tutoring session. We fell into a casual conversation, but it didn’t take long before things turned a bit awkward.
“Is this Mallory?” a voice whispered in my ear.
I glanced over my shoulder, but the world dropped out from beneath my feet. The waitress grinned with wicked glee. I turned toward Chuck and Barry, but they didn’t seem to realize the shit was hitting the fan.
“Hey, Mallory,” the waitress said. “I’m Cat.”
Mallory’s eyebrows scrunched together when she glanced at me. She addressed Cat. “How did you know my name?”
Cat sharpened her claws. “You can say I heard Aaron scream it a few times.” She jutted out her hip and put her hand on the table. “Okay, more than a few. Anyway, what can I get you?”
Mallory glanced between us several times, her embarrassment clear on her face. “Nothing. Thank you.”
I reached for her, but she pulled away. The table had gone quiet. I glanced at Chuck who shook his head. Yep, I was royally screwed.
“Cat, can you call me a cab, though? I really need to get out of here.” Mallory slid off the stool and pulled her coat on as she shouldered her way to the front door.
“You’re a right bitch, Cat,” I said before I went after Mallory. She stood outside the door, fighting back the tears. “Mallory?”
“Leave me alone, Aaron.” She turned her back on me.
Anger filled my chest. This was bullshit. Punishing me for something I’d done months ago. Okay, it was pretty fucking stupid on my part, but I didn’t deserve this shit. Not now. Not after waiting for her, being patient for her, letting her set the pace. And where did that get me? I finally get her to open up and she shuts me down when she learns I’m not a fucking virgin.
“If that’s what you want, Mallory, fine.” I stepped up behind her, close enough she would know I was there and far enough away to not make her feel threatened. “But you’re not being fair about this.”
“I’m not being fair about this?” She turned to face me, inadvertently closing the distance between us. “Did you not hear what she said? You slept with her and called her by my name.”
“Not true.” I almost slapped myself in the face for the lie. “Yeah, I screwed Cat. When I was single. After I’d been rejected by the most perfect girl in the world.” I moved a half step closer until our chests were almost touching. “But I never called her by your name.”
She sucked the corner of her bottom lip into her mouth and dropped her gaze to my chest. I counted the heartbeats between us, waiting for her to throw me a bone. Or anything.
“I’m not perfect, Aaron.” She lifted her eyes to meet mine.
“Neither am I, and I’m tired of pretending to be just to get you to like me.” I ran my hand through my hair and stepped away from her. “Every time we move forward, something slaps us back. Maybe the universe is telling us something, huh? Maybe being with you wasn’t supposed to happen.” I shook my head at how absurd that sounded and laughed. “I sound like a fucking poet.”
“Maybe we should take a break? From us?”
“You can’t take a break from something that never really existed.” It was like I’d stabbed her with a bowie knife when I’d turned it on myself. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”
A cab pulled up and honked. Mallory shook her head; the pain in her eyes was more than I could bear. She moved toward the cab, and I moved toward her. Before she could get the door open, I pulled her against me and kissed her like I’d wanted to in the truck. No more sweet pecks or chaste brushes of the lips. No more stolen kisses between classes. I kissed her like I’d never see her again, and honestly, I didn’t think I would after the disaster inside O’Malley’s. But she kissed me back. The hope built in my chest. This thing between us was right.
When we finally broke apart, the cab was gone.
“I’m no saint, Mallory,” I whispered. “But I’ll fucking burn the world to make this right between us.”
“What about the universe?” Her breath froze in the air.
“Like I’m one to listen to the universe.” I pressed my forehead to hers. “I call do-over.”
“Do-over works for me.” She sighed against my lips. “But let’s go somewhere else, okay?”
“Deal.”
I took her to The 9er Diner on the other side of town, away from the college and away from O’Malley’s. We sat in a booth, ordered burgers and milkshakes, and celebrated my triumph in Monroe’s class. We planned for the Christmas break, and Mallory agreed to come home with me. Talk about an early Christmas present. We talked like we’d known each other our entire lives. Even though there were still walls that needed to come down.
It was almost one when I dropped her off at her house. We stood in front of her door, kissing like teenagers until I had to leave. I still had one more final to deal with before I packed up my room for a few weeks.
I drove back to my dorm happier than I’d ever been, but a nagging voice in the back of my head reminded me that this thing with Mallory was as delicate as a spider web. If she ever found out, it wouldn’t just break. It would disappear as if it never existed.