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Forbidden Addiction (Forbidden, Book #4) by R.L. Kenderson (1)

 

PHOENIX KAPLAN RAISED her hand to the Guardians’ entrance, hesitating for a second before knocking. It was always the same. She shouldn’t be here, yet here she stood.

She rubbed her hands over her arms. It was early April, and while it was spring, the nights were still cool, and she was wearing only a light sweater.

The door swung open to reveal Lexine Harlow. “Oh, it’s you,” she said with an air of disappointment and contempt. “He’s in his office,” she added, not even waiting for Phoenix to come in as she walked away.

One would think that, after the mating of the Guardians’ vampire princess to the Minnesota Pride’s alpha’s son months ago and the birth of their babies around the corner, Lexine would be more cordial. A relationship had formed between the two species, and all the Guardians had been welcoming of Phoenix and her monthly visits, except for Lexine.

Not that Phoenix cared too much. It was more of an annoyance than a concern. She really wasn’t here to make friends anyway.

She was here for Dante.

Phoenix stepped over the threshold and closed the front door behind her before heading down the hall to Dante’s office.

Phoenix had a somewhat complicated past with the vampire.

When Vaughn and Naya mated and someone tried to kidnap them along with Vaughn’s sister, Phoenix was sent with Naya and Vaughn to stay at the Guardians’ compound for safety. Phoenix didn’t want to be there from the start. She wasn’t prejudiced against the vampires; she just hated being on protective duty, on defense. She wanted to be out in the field, searching and fighting, on the offensive. She hated sitting around, waiting. And she hated her reaction to Dante.

Phoenix had a painful history when it came to the opposite gender and intimacy. She’d had a not-so-great childhood, and as she’d gotten older, she’d had a couple of sexual encounters that both ended in disasters. She wasn’t able to be the kind of woman who men wanted in the bedroom. And, even with those couple of men—boys really because it had been years ago—she’d never felt attraction to them the way she did with Dante.

At first, she didn’t know what she felt toward him, not recognizing her desire for what it was because she hadn’t experienced it before. Her partners in the past had been good-looking with nice, gentle demeanors, and that was basically what had drawn her to them. But, with Dante, it was pure sexual magnetism. Pun intended because Phoenix’s cat was very into him.

Good thing she had complete control over her cat since, no matter how much she was attracted to Dante, it wouldn’t end well if she let herself go there. Because, now that she knew Dante better, Phoenix liked him. She would rather get in a fight with five to one odds than see that look of pity in his eyes that she’d seen from her past bedroom efforts. She might be damaged, but she still had her pride.

During her stay at the Guardians’ manor, they discovered who was behind the abductions, and they were all planning to go out into the field when Vaughn brought up Dante’s need to feed. Due to the male cat-shifter’s new mate, he had recognized Dante’s need, much to Dante’s irritation.

Phoenix would do anything for her friends and fellow sentinels—they had proven their loyalty to her, and they were the only family she had—so she volunteered to be the metaphorical sacrificial lamb. It might not be a big thing to some, but for her to offer up her blood and therefore her body, it was a huge deal. The funny thing was, Dante promptly turned her down—informing her that, when he fed, he fucked—but she persisted, confronting him again a few days later.

He tried to intimidate her, which was easy at first. She caught him in his bedroom after coming out of the shower, so he was only wearing a towel, and he tried to use his near nakedness to get her to leave. She swallowed all her nerves and continued on with her mission to get Dante to feed. But, when she offered to have sex with him, most of the fight had left his body, and she was immediately relieved. It felt a little too close to prostitution, even with her unwanted attraction to Dante. Phoenix then thought he would feed from her wrist to maintain a good distance between them, but Dante fed from her neck instead. She didn’t know if a part of him was still punishing her for pushing him into the situation or if he wanted to be close to her. Maybe both, but she didn’t ask because she truly didn’t know what she wanted the answer to be.

So, Dante pulled her close and held her against his bedroom door as he proceeded to sink his fangs into her neck. It scared her. Not because it hurt or because she was a coward, but because she was turned on. That frightened the shit out of her. And, somehow, Dante knew. Over the years, Phoenix had worked very hard to hide her feelings. Shifters and vampires could sense emotions, and she in no way wanted hers to be used against her again, so she had learned to cover hers. Yet Dante knew she was aroused, and he completely shocked her when he cut his thumb and stuck it in her mouth. She never tasted anything like it. Vampire blood was sweet. Not like sugary candy, but more like chili with loads of brown sugar in it. Rich, hearty, and saccharine.

But that wasn’t even the biggest shocker.

What completely blew her mind was that, with the combination of Dante sucking on her neck, rubbing his erection between her legs, and putting his blood in her mouth, Phoenix orgasmed. Pathetically, the first one she’d ever had in her life. Not that she hadn’t tried to get herself off before—she was a twenty-first century woman after all—but she just hadn’t succeeded. Not only that, but her scent, the scent of her lust, filled the room. So ashamed and a little horrified that Dante had gotten her off and exposed her scent, she fled his bedroom as soon as he released her. It was only later she remembered that Dante had climaxed, too. It didn’t ease her humiliation, but it was a relief to know she wasn’t the only one affected.

Phoenix avoided Dante after that for a while. To this day, they still hadn’t talked about it. And any thoughts of discussing it were pushed aside when she was kidnapped by her alpha’s corrupt cousin and then rescued by Dante. She found out later that Dante had located her through the blood he’d consumed from her. She was shaken up from her ordeal, and she asked Dante to take her home with him. He hadn’t even hesitated before agreeing. And, when Dante had discovered what Gerald had done to her while under his control, he was kind and gentle as he healed her with the enzymes in his saliva. After that encounter, she slept in his bed next to him for the next three weeks because she couldn’t sleep alone with Gerald still on the loose. Something else they hadn’t talked about because they went to bed and woke up at different times, and with the exception of Phoenix waking to find Dante sleeping on her hair, they hadn’t touched.

Then, Dante was shot in the leg and asked Phoenix to feed him again while he was still in his hospital bed. Refusing him hadn’t even crossed her mind. That time, she was the one who offered her neck, she was the one who cut Dante’s finger and slipped it in her mouth so that she could suck on his blood, and she was the one who rubbed her groin over his. After they both came again, Dante seemed to have some regret, and she left the room before he could say the words out loud. She went back to the bunkhouse that night and ignored all of Dante’s phone calls and texts.

Phoenix ran into him at Naya and Vaughn’s New Year’s party where she learned that him sleeping next to her and feeding from her had been no big deal to Dante. He wanted to make sure he hadn’t hurt her since they were friends. While she hadn’t slept next to another male and had experienced her most satisfying sexual experiences with him, it was “just sleeping and feeding, a form of nourishment” to him. It was way more than a big deal to her. The embarrassment still stung even if Dante had no idea how she felt. That was why she would not attempt a full-on sexual relationship with him. Anything she felt that night would be tenfold worse when he discovered how defective she was in bed.

She probably would have avoided Dante at all costs after that night, but when he later called three times in less than five minutes, she knew it had to be something important. And it was. Dante found Gerald, and instead of informing her alpha, Vance, he called her. She would forever remember that.

Dante and Phoenix went after Gerald, stupidly without backup. Phoenix was so angry at what he’d done to her that all she wanted was revenge. Dante must have known and didn’t even attempt to stop her. And it almost got him killed. In their scuffle with Gerald, Phoenix was shot, and so was Dante, but this time, it hadn’t been in the leg. Phoenix killed Gerald when she discovered Dante was hurt, and she finally used her brain and called for help before offering Dante her vein and passing out.

When she woke up in the hospital, she discovered that Dante had refused to leave her side and that she’d given him so much blood that she needed a blood transfusion, which Dante had provided because he wouldn’t let anyone else do it. They spent the rest of their time in the hospital side by side—not touching, but reassuring each other with their presence. It was just one more thing the two of them hadn’t discussed, and instead, since then, Phoenix would show up every month to feed Dante. Dante got blood, and she got skin-to-skin contact that satisfied her shifter DNA. They didn’t talk about her coming—he didn’t ask, and she didn’t offer—but she always showed up, and he never refused her. One thing was for sure, Dante + Phoenix = Avoidance with a capital A.

Like she’d said, complicated.

She knew they couldn’t go on like this forever, and she dreaded ending their time together, but she wasn’t about to be the one to bring up the subject because it might end sooner if she said something. Nope, she was going to leave things exactly the way they were. She’d take what little she could get.

Phoenix reached Dante’s office, raised her hand, and knocked.

Dante Leonidas raised his head from the map spread out on his desk from where he’d been studying it when he heard the rap at his door.

Phoenix.

Usually, he prepared himself before she arrived, but he’d been so lost in thought that he didn’t notice her scent or her presence despite her blood in him. He cursed himself for not paying attention, but it didn’t really matter. He’d never be truly equipped to see her.

“Enter,” he called out.

The entrance to his office opened, and Phoenix slipped through before closing the door behind her.

Dante held his breath as the aroma of sunshine flooded the room, but it was too late. Her scent teased his nostrils, and suddenly, his pants were too tight as his cock hardened under his fly. He had to reach down and adjust himself under the desk before the painful position caused him to wince. Males always talked about having big dicks, but honestly, it wasn’t that great. It could really be a pain in the ass sometimes. No pun intended.

“Hey,” the beautiful cat-shifter said as she approached his desk.

She was sans makeup with her long red-and-black hair in a ponytail while she wore her usual outfit of shapeless clothing. Today, it was a sweater and jeans. But, despite her baggy attire, Dante could still make out her curves underneath. It didn’t hurt that he’d seen her without her clothes in the past. Picturing her naked didn’t help his hard-on.

She glanced down at the Minneapolis/St. Paul area map that he’d been reviewing before she entered. “What are you looking at?”

He pointed to the Xs he’d made in red. “I marked all the incidents on the list in hopes that maybe a pattern or something would jump out at me.” Dante threw the pen he had been holding on top of the map as he leaned back in his chair and exhaled his frustration. “So far, it’s been a bust.”

Over the last few months, crimes had been happening to vampire and shifter residences and places of business. It wasn’t like the paranormal community was immune to crime, but the unusual part about it was how they were all coming in pairs. Whatever happened to a vampire-owned place, the same thing would happen to a shifter-owned place. The first incident had been graffiti at a vampire-owned restaurant on the same night a shifter-owned restaurant was hit. It was an obvious message to both vampires and shifters. The latest incidents were fires started at vampire- and shifter-owned homes within an hour of each other. The worst part of the entire situation was that the human police were starting to notice.

Phoenix came around to his side of the desk and leaned over to read the map and his notes. Her baggy pants hung on her hips, but when she bent over, they stretched across her ass, and Dante had to fight not to ogle her. His erection got harder, if that was even possible, and he fought his desire to pull her into his lap, strip off her clothes, and bury himself inside her.

But that would never happen.

Despite the fact that she was there to feed him, they were not in a romantic or sexual relationship. Dante didn’t know all the details about what had happened to Phoenix in her past, but he knew she had been traumatized. So, while he usually had sex with the females he fed from, the only thing he’d be sinking inside her were his fangs. His little head didn’t get it, but his big head did, and he wasn’t going to add to her issues. For now, feeding from her and being her friend was enough. But, damn, this celibacy thing just might kill him.

Maybe, someday, he would tell her how he felt about her, but today wasn’t that day. She wasn’t ready to hear it.

Turning his thoughts back to the task at hand, he asked her, “Have you guys come up with anything?”

She spun around and sat on the edge of the desk, the emerald green of her eyes filled with vexation. “No. Are you coming to the meeting tomorrow?”

“Yes, we’ll all be there.”

“That’s good.” She nodded her approval. “One of the wolf-shifter sentinels is an officer in the Minneapolis Police Department. Damien told Vance that the sentinel would fill us in on what the humans knew.”

The wolf-shifter alpha was really proving himself to the cat-shifter alpha. Damien wasn’t going to let the newly healed bond between the two subspecies get fractured again, it seemed.

Dante furrowed his brows. “You don’t have any cat-shifters in the police force?”

“Yes, we do, but none of them are sentinels. They give us information, but we don’t share what we know back with them. It’s a good idea, what Damien did, having someone work both angles. I just hope Vance doesn’t make one of us sign up for the police academy.” She made a face of disgust. “At least, I hope it isn’t me.”

Dante chuckled. “Humans aren’t that bad.”

She looked at him like he was crazy. “Humans aren’t that bad? The same species that traditionally comes at your species with a stake through the heart?”

“Pretty sure none of the members of the St. Paul Police Department are carrying stakes.”

“No, just guns.”

He laughed again. “I suppose you have a point.”

“So, does that mean you have vampires on the force? How does that work with the sun thing?”

“Of course we do. They enter the academy before their conversion, and after, they work the night shift.” Dante frowned. “Although I never thought to have one of the Guardians work for us and the police at the same time. It is smart.”

The conversation stalled, and silence fell over the room. Their eyes met, but neither moved.

The knock at the door broke the quietness, and Dante looked at the bare skin on Phoenix’s neck. “Come back later. I’m busy.”

He swiveled his chair to face her and opened his legs. “Come here, Red.”

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