DANTE OPENED THE car door for Phoenix, so she could get in the passenger side. He slid behind the steering wheel and left the clinic before saying anything to Phoenix.
She’d been very distressed at the clinic once Vaughn brought the twins out, and her anxiety had increased when Kenzie put baby Victoria in her arms. But then, out of nowhere, a calmness had settled over Phoenix after he offered to help her. His mind was reeling with the possibilities.
“So, what did you want to talk about?”
Phoenix stared straight ahead, out the windshield. “No judging, please.”
“Of course not.”
“I have always wanted to be a mother,” she said matter-of-factly.
He figured she was keeping all emotion out of her voice in case he said something to make her feel like her dream was less than.
He admitted he was shocked. He would have expected Phoenix to be the last person to say that, and frankly, he didn’t know how to respond. “I can understand that,” is what he settled on because it was the truth. “I’ve always pictured having children myself.”
“Good. Then, this should be easier.”
What in the world…
“Do you know how babies are conceived?”
“Uh…” Is this a trick question?
“I mean, shifter babies.”
That question made more sense. “A little but not the specifics. Shifter females have a mating heat that requires constant…stimulation.”
“We are only fertile two times a year, about every six months, when we go through our mating heat. It lasts several days, and if we don’t conceive, we have to wait again. That is why there are so few of us compared to humans.”
“Okay.” Where was she going with this?
“You meant what you said to me at L and L, right? That I could trust you, and you would never hurt me?”
“Of course.” Now, Dante was completely lost.
Phoenix looked over at him and smiled. “Good. My mating heat is in less than a month, and I want you to get me pregnant.”
Dante swerved into the next lane, almost hitting another car. “What?”
“I want you to have sex with me during my next mating heat and get me pregnant. The whole process will take a few days, so that is why I wanted to warn you now, so you know you’ll be unavailable for a while.”
“You misunderstood. I heard you. I just don’t understand why.”
Phoenix sighed, as if she were talking to an imbecile. “I want to be a mother. I only have two chances every year. I am not getting any younger. Since it looks like I will never be comfortable having sex and therefore finding a mate, I would like you to get me pregnant.”
“Did you just hear yourself?” Dante asked. “You will never be comfortable having sex, but you want me to…to…” He couldn’t finish.
“Knock me up? Yes.”
“No,” he told her. No way.
“No?” she repeated.
“No.”
She threw her hands up. “Why not?”
“Let me get this straight. You don’t like sex; in fact, you dislike it. Yet you want me to have sex with you over and over again until you get pregnant.”
“Yes,” she said.
“And you don’t find anything wrong with that?”
“If it gets me what I want, then no.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that, Phoenix.” It was crazy that they were even having this conversation.
“Oh,” she said, as if she suddenly realized how ridiculous she sounded. “You can be a part of our child’s life if you want. Or you don’t have to be. I won’t deny or force you to do either.”
Holy shit, she just doesn’t get it.
“While I appreciate that, I am not going to force myself on you over and over, all the while knowing that you are hating every second of it. Even if you are willing and it was your idea, I don’t have that certain kink. I doubt I’d even be able to start, much less...finish.”
The thought of Phoenix lying on a bed, simply enduring sex, while he fucked her made him sick to his stomach. His dick and balls were shriveling up, just thinking about it.
“But—”
“I’m sorry, Phoenix. I can’t do that to you. Or to me.”
She put her back to him and stared out the passenger window. He felt her despair that he’d felt in her earlier at the clinic. It was so strong through their blood link that he almost tasted it.
Had she really felt better after coming up with that crazy, outrageous idea? It seemed so.
He felt awful. He wanted to help her in any way he could, but he just couldn’t do it. It felt too much like rape, and he would never do that to a woman. Ever.
They rode the rest of the way in silence. When they pulled up to the king and queen’s mansion, Dante got out while Phoenix stayed inside the vehicle. The Kensington’s butler, Hans, answered the door and let him in. He had called ahead to tell them that he was coming, but Naya’s parents weren’t ready.
Left alone with his thoughts, Dante mulled over what Phoenix had said. He wanted to help her but didn’t know how.
Just as he heard footsteps on the stairs, the horrible thought of Phoenix asking someone else to help her materialized in his head, and Dante’s vision waned. Over his dead body would he give her the opportunity to ask someone else to do that for her. There was no way he was going to let anyone else touch her, have sex with her, put a baby inside her.
He’d—
“Dante?”
He heard his name and looked up at his king and queen.
Dante cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, sir. My thoughts were momentarily preoccupied. Are you and the queen ready to go?”
“Yes. Shall we go?” the king said.
Dante held out his arm to escort the queen down the front steps and into his SUV.
Once the king and queen were settled, Dante introduced Phoenix, “Sir, ma’am, this is Phoenix. She is a sentinel with your son-in-law’s pride.”
Phoenix turned around and held out her hand. “Hello,” she said.
Dante leaned closer to her and whispered, “They don’t shake hands.”
“Oh,” she said as she withdrew her hand. “It’s nice to meet you,” she told Naya’s parents.
“Likewise, I’m sure,” the queen spoke, her voice frosty.
The queen might have accepted her daughter’s mating but only barely. She wasn’t happy about the situation. At least she was going to visit her grandchildren. Part of Dante was still surprised, but maybe even she wasn’t that heartless.
“Can you tell us how our daughter is doing, Dante?”
Dante relayed the information that Vaughn had given him while Phoenix sat in silence and listened. After the update, there didn’t seem to be any more for anyone to say, and Dante’s thoughts returned to Phoenix’s request.
He couldn’t stop picturing her with someone else. Someone like Saxon. And, while Phoenix had said she found sex uncomfortable, Dante continued to picture Saxon making Phoenix come with a look of pleasure on her face. It was starting to drive him insane.
He was so lost in his thoughts, he didn’t realize that he’d driven all the way to the clinic on autopilot. As he pulled up to the door, he knew what he had to do.
Phoenix reached for the door handle, and Dante lightly touched her arm to stop her.
“Will you stay in here until I park? I need to say something to you.”
She studied his face before dropping her hand. “Fine,” she bit out.
“Give me one moment,” he told her.
Dante exited the SUV, opened the back doors to let the king and queen out, and walked them to the front door. Once they were safely inside, he went back to his vehicle. He found a spot and put the SUV in park before saying anything to Phoenix.
She was sitting with her arms crossed, her wall firmly in place, and he cursed himself. He’d worked so hard to break some of it down, only to have her put it back up with a single conversation.
“Well?” she prompted. She was still upset with him.
“I will help you,” he said.
She dropped her arms, and a look of amazement crossed her face.
Dante put up a finger. “On two conditions.”
“Deal.”
He frowned. “You don’t even know what I’m going to say.”
“I don’t care. I’m just happy you’ve agreed.”
“Well, I care. My first requirement is that I will get to be this child’s father. I am not a sperm donor.”
She smiled. “I already said you could.”
Whew. He’d been afraid that she would fight him on that.
“My second stipulation is that we have to get to know each other, physically, before your mating heat arrives. I’m not having sex with you during your mating heat while you simply lie there and endure it. We will make time to learn each other’s likes and dislikes. I want to make the experience good for you. We’re going to start slow and take our time before we have sex.”
She lost her smile. “Dante,” she sighed. “It’s no use. It won’t make any difference.”
“It will to me. It’s the only way I’ll agree to do this. It’s either that or nothing.” Please don’t turn me down and ask someone else, he prayed. Outside though, he played it cool. He didn’t want her to know exactly how much this meant to him.
“Fine. But you’re just going to be disappointed. Don’t blame me when you end up frustrated.”
The pleasure Dante felt that she had agreed swept over him. He opened his door and turned to her. “Oh, Phoenix.” What a silly female. “Don’t you know, you could never disappoint me?”
And, with that, Dante departed his SUV and went toward the clinic, whistling all the way. He was going to find a way to pleasure her if it was the last thing he did. Phoenix deserved it.