Chapter Fifteen
“Thank you for staying late tonight, Emily.”
The nanny turned with a smile. “Not a problem. Enjoy your evening with Clara.”
“We made it through one date incredibly well. I thought I’d surprise her tonight with another,” Walker said, perched on one of the new chairs in the room he and Emily had declared Hunter’s. It wasn’t as if they were short on guest rooms, and with how things had developed with Clara he’d decided to turn the bedroom next to his into a nursery. There were still a few pieces missing, but Emily had outdone herself getting the room set up.
Though eyeing the newly positioned crib, Walker wasn’t sure how he felt about Hunter sleeping away from him. Even if it was just the next room.
How fast things change.
A week ago, a baby in his bedroom was the last thing he’d have wanted, but even though it had only been a few days, Hunter had wormed his way into his heart. He doubted it would be a temporary affliction.
Emily changed the baby with deft fingers before bringing him over to place in his arms.
“Where are you two going to go?”
“I figured I’d take her back to somewhere from our past. It was the first place I ever really noticed Clara in a way that went beyond the bounds of friendship.”
Emily grinned. “That’s too cute.”
“What every man wants to hear. Our next date obviously needs to include beer and monster trucks.”
“Sorry,” she said. “I meant it sounds like a great place to take this next step in your relationship. Honestly, I thought you two were a couple when I first started.”
“We get that a lot,” he agreed.
She shook her head as she folded the fresh laundry. “Maybe they were onto something.”
“So it would seem. For two smart people, we were the last to know.”
“She should be home any minute. Do you need to do anything to get ready? I can watch Hunter if you do.”
He danced a stuffed toy in front of his son’s eyes, enjoying the miniature smile that erupted on the baby’s face.
“I should get changed but…”
“But this little guy is a charmer,” she said, smiling down at her charge with a fondness that eased some of the tension in Walker’s chest.
“That he is. Must get it from his mother.”
Whoever she is.
Not for the first time, he cursed his wandering eye. If he’d been more careful, made better choices, none of them would be in this mess.
Then again, he wouldn’t have Hunter. He would never have asked Clara to move in, and then they’d never have stolen that first illicit kiss.
Would he trade all that in for the simpler life he would have had if he’d just stayed in a year ago instead of blazing through a few months of foolish pleasure?
I don’t regret him. Even if he wished Hunter had been conceived the right way. In a loving relationship with two parents who wanted him.
With a mother with curly brown hair and chocolate eyes.
That sounds a lot more serious than you told Clara you were ready for.
Kissing the baby’s forehead, he handed him back to Emily. “I should get changed,” he said. “Can you take him for a few minutes?”
“No problem,” she replied, accepting the armful.
The baby followed Walker with his eyes as he left the room, a trait he’d taken to doing this week. Each time the tiny head turned to search the room for his father, Walker’s heart squeezed. If his mother had never sent him here, he’d have never known this feeling could exist.
Maybe someday I’ll thank her.
If their paths ever crossed again. He’d considered the women who could potentially be Hunter’s mother and none of them were anywhere close. A couple were abroad, and the one had moved down south to open a bakery. None showed any signs of coming back into his life any time soon. He knew he’d eventually have to reach out to them all to figure out who he shared a child with, but he wanted the DNA results first. Besides, clearly Hunter’s mother was not interested in being found.
That’s fine with me. Let her stay away for a while so Clara and I can sort everything out.
There was only so much drama one month could hold, after all.
Reaching his room, he changed quickly into his jeans. Tonight, didn’t require Walker Beckett, billionaire CEO. He needed…normal. An outfit that would remind Clara of the days before his software had exploded. Back when they’d been at the start of their relationship and he’d made a choice that had kept them apart for the better part of a decade.
He’d like to rewrite that decision.
Glancing in the mirror, he brushed back the dark hair that perpetually fell over his forehead. He’d thought of cutting it all short many times but could never do it. Not when brushing that hair out of his eyes was one of the only ways Clara would touch him.
Everything’s different now.
He couldn’t wait to explore the possibilities.
A knock sounded at the door, and he turned to see Emily in the doorway. “She just walked in,” she whispered conspiratorially.
Showtime.
Lightness filled him as he jogged down the stairs to see Clara shrugging out of her coat in the entrance way.
“Hey,” she greeted him with an open smile. “How’s Hunter?”
His grin widened, loving how his son was her top priority.
“He’s with Emily,” he replied, moving closer to her. “She’s going to stay late today to do a little babysitting again.”
“Oh?” She arched a brow. “Two nights in a row? Aren’t you embracing your inner Romeo. Where are we going?”
“On a date,” he replied.
She blinked. “A date? We could just order in and have one here. You still have that bottle of champagne to open.”
“No,” he replied, wrapping an arm around her waist. “I want to take you out. Somewhere outside of this condo where there aren’t baby toys on every surface. Somewhere we can just be us.”
“We don’t really know what ‘us’ looks like yet,” she pointed out, sliding her hands around his shoulders.
“Time we figured it out, don’t you think?”
Her gaze dipped to his lips before a radiant smile crossed her face. “Absolutely.”
He ached to kiss her but if he did, they’d never leave the house. Holding himself in check, he pressed his lips to the skin beneath her ear before stepping back.
“Go change if you need to,” he said. “I’ll call a car while you do.”
“What should I change into?” she asked, examining his own clothes.
“Casual,” he replied. “Low key.”
Two brows arched this time, and he wondered if he’d miscalculated. Maybe he should have pulled out all the billionaire stops. Wined and dined her at Michelin-starred restaurants with limitless champagne and expensive entrees.
But then her smile returned. “Sounds amazing. Give me five minutes,” she said before running up the stairs. He heard her duck into the new nursery first before heading for her own room. Within minutes, she was racing down the steps, clad in jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt.
Reaching for her hand, he led her from the home as Emily and Hunter stood on the stairs, waving goodbye.
“Come on,” he said to her as they called the elevator. “Let’s have an adventure.”
Using his arm for stability, she rose and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. “Lead on,” she replied without hesitation. “I’ll follow you anywhere.”
His heart leapt in his chest at the words. They shouldn’t affect him so much. He should be trying to keep some distance between them but, as always, Clara blasted through all his best-laid plans.
It’s too early to think about more than a day or two in the future, he warned himself. You have too many responsibilities to fall into a serious relationship right now.
But Clara wasn’t someone he could be casual with. Not now that he finally had her. After all these years.
…
Clara looked out the dark car window as they whizzed through the city streets.
“Not even a clue, huh?” she asked as she relaxed back against her companion.
“We’ll be there soon,” he replied, playing idly with her fingers.
Content, she settled back against him, enjoying the simple pleasure of being able to touch him the way she’d always wanted to.
“Look.” She pointed. “We’re by the university.”
His driver circled the main road of the campus as Clara left his arms to press against the window.
“Remember what it felt like to run across the quad, late for a lecture?” she asked.
“Oh, yes. I had one professor tell me if I couldn’t be on time to not bother showing up.”
“Did you ever make it?”
“No. I was planning on dropping his class. But after that I audited it for the rest of the semester just on principle. I don’t think I made it on time once.”
“Now you’re one of the school’s most successful graduates. Or near graduate.”
“Hey, hey, they gave me an honorary degree.”
“Well, you were always far smarter than anyone teaching at the front of a class.”
He shrugged. “There were a few I enjoyed. This place was my playground, sampling the courses and ideas that interested me. Teaching me how to talk to others who looked at the world in the same way I do.”
She twined her fingers through his. “You’ve come so far. I’m proud of you, you know.”
“I know,” he said, brushing his lips to the back of her hand. “You’ve always cheered me on.”
“What are friends for?”
He smiled as he leaned closer. “More than friends now.”
Her eyes fluttered shut as he kissed her. Had she ever felt this contented in her life? It’s like a piece of her that was always missing had clicked into place and she never wanted to let it go.
“Mr. Beckett, we’ve arrived,” the driver said, interrupting them as the car slowed to a stop.
Clara glanced out the window and laughed. “Sammy’s?” she asked. “I think they’ll kick out anyone older than twenty-one here.”
“I called ahead,” he said as they got out of the car. “We’re more than welcome.”
She stood before their go-to bar from their college days and shook her head. She’d thought she’d never have another lukewarm pint of cheap beer or plate of cheesy fries again, yet here she was.
“I’ve lost track of the number of times we hung out here,” she said, staring at the faded red sign that had become synonymous with underage drinking when they’d been in school.
“Too many to count,” he agreed, coming up behind her. “You in for one more night?”
He could have taken her anywhere. A restaurant on one of the city’s most sought-after rooftops or a private gallery tour only available to the very, very rich. Instead, he’d brought her to a dive bar where they wouldn’t likely rack up a bill higher than fifty dollars.
“You couldn’t have picked a more perfect spot,” she finally whispered, her chest tight.
He kissed the side of her cheek. “Good.”
“Let’s go.” Taking his hand, they stepped into their past.
Sound hit them like a wave when they walked through the door. The bar clearly hadn’t been updated in the years since her graduation. Red vinyl booths lined one wall while scarred tables filled the front of the bar. Everything from initials in hearts to calculus equations had been carved into the worn surfaces. They used to try a different table every time they’d come here, looking for new and more interesting marks left by other students.
Walker strode forward, leading her to a booth she remembered well.
A handwritten “reservation” sign sat propped against a barely lit candle in the center of the table.
“I didn’t think Sammy’s did reservations,” she said, sliding into their old booth.
“You should have heard the laughter when I asked for one,” he agreed. “Luckily, they were open to a very generous donation from a former alum.”
“That checkbook does come in handy every now and then.”
No sooner had they taken their seats when a frazzled waiter rushed over with two pints on his tray and a plate of her favorite fries.
“Gotta say, as an adult this looks less appealing,” she said, pulling a cheesy fry free from the pile.
“The truth is in the taste I guess,” he replied, reaching for his beer.
As soon as the fry hit her tongue, she couldn’t help her laughter. It tasted the exact way she remembered. Greasy, oily, and yet so addictively good.
“I’m glad I don’t have easy access to these normally,” she said as she reached for another.
“The beer is just as I remember it, too.”
“No-name cheap stuff that’s never seen the inside of a fridge?”
“The very same.”
Lifting her own beer, she clinked her glass to his. “Here’s to new beginnings,” she said.
“And better decisions,” he replied.
“It was sweet of you to bring us here. I would never have thought about coming back, even though it’s only a subway ride away.”
“I haven’t been back either. But this is the place I first wanted to ask you out, so it seemed appropriate to return.”
She choked on her beer. “What? You wanted to ask me out when we were in college?”
“Yup.” He saluted her with his drink.
“Why didn’t you?” she demanded. She knew why she’d kept silent in their early years. He’d been dating her best friend, and by the time they’d broken up, it had always felt too late. Like they’d missed their chance. By then, they’d been such good friends that she’d been afraid to do anything to jeopardize that. Besides, it’d felt disloyal to date an ex of her closest friend at the time.
Years later, it was Walker who’d stayed in her life, not her roommate. The idea that she’d stayed away from him because of a woman she barely remembered was ludicrous in hindsight.
“I was going to,” he said, reaching for some fries. “I asked you here one night and we sat in this booth. Then you carved this into the table.” He moved the candle to reveal their initials. Amidst years of graffiti, it still held its own little square of space. Their initials were followed by an equal sign that pointed at the end of the scrawled autograph.
“Friends 4ever,” she read, shaking her head at the spelling.
“You had such a wide smile as you used your keys to write this. Then you looked up at me and made me promise it was true. That’d we’d be friends for the rest of our lives.”
She swallowed hard. “That’s why you never asked me out?”
He trailed his fingers down her cheek. “In that moment, I was torn over what I wanted more. I’d never had a relationship that lasted very long.”
“Some things never change.”
“I thought about my options. I could have you for a limited time as my girlfriend. Or I could be your friend. Forever.”
“You picked friendship,” she whispered.
“I did.” He interlaced their fingers. “We’ve had ten years to build our foundation. Who knows what would have happened if I’d said what I meant to all those years ago?”
If he’d asked her out, she would have accepted. He would have been her first real boyfriend and, like most firsts, they probably would have ended up crashing and burning. When he’d left school, she would have felt like he was abandoning her, and she would have done something drastic like dumped him. Or he would have made his first million and streaked ahead of her, not wanting to be held back by a college sweetheart. One way or another, they would have been torn apart had they started too young.
Or maybe we would have been the exception. Maybe we would have loved each other enough to weather any storm. We would have married. Would have had Hunter together.
Her heart twisted. Who knew what might have happened to them had they picked a different path years ago in this booth?
“We’ll never know what would have happened,” she said, squeezing his fingers. “But we’re not college kids anymore, uncertain about our future or what we want.”
“No,” he agreed. “I’ve finally figured that bit out.”
“And?”
“You,” he said simply. “I just want you. For however long we have.”
Her heart cracked open in her chest. “Me too,” she murmured. “Just you.”
She slid closer in the booth until their bodies pressed together. All she had to do was lift her face and he was there. Kissing her with infinite gentleness. This time they’d pick a different path in this booth. And she hoped, after all these years, it finally led them to a future together.
“Excuse me.”
They broke apart to see the waiter was back with a tray full of food. The kid quickly filled up the table with every item they used to consume with gusto.
“Your grand plan was to win me over with cheap beer, chicken fingers, and chili dogs?” she asked.
“Pretty much.”
She kissed his cheek. “It’s like you’re a genius or something.”
“Every now and then I have my moments.”
“A baby-free evening and all the junk food I can eat. This is so much better than chocolate or flowers.”
“Dig in.” He passed her a plate, which she eagerly filled.
They fell into easy conversation as they put away their meal. The room was filled with memories and they merrily relived the best of them. The late nights at house parties that ended with early morning runs to Sammy’s for a greasy breakfast to get them back on their feet. Evenings spent with Walker trying to teach her the basics of the math she’d need to get through her courses until it’d become apparent she was not the whiz with numbers he was.
She’d been worried then, when she’d seen how brilliant he truly was. She’d feared he’d leave her behind, but he never had. She’d been at the launch parties of every product he’d developed. Smiled at the cameras during the unveiling of his current corporation. He’d never once made her feel like she no longer belonged in his life, even when his bank account doubled, then tripled hers.
“What?” he asked, finishing off his second pint.
“I was just thinking how lucky I was,” she said truthfully. “In school, I worried you’d grow too far beyond my reach. But you never left me behind. Not even when I’m sure it would have been easy to.”
“Losing you was my biggest fear when I dropped out. I promised myself if we could weather that, we could make it through anything.” His eyes met hers.
Her breath caught at the words. He might not have said he loved her, but did she have any doubt when he looked at her the way he was now?
She didn’t need any big declarations. Didn’t want sweeping gestures. If he needed to think this was temporary to help him wrap his mind around a new baby and a new girlfriend, that was fine. This was all she needed. Proof that they’d been meant for each other right from the start when she’d carved their initials into the wood.
“I like remembering how we started,” she said. “But I’d rather enjoy where we are now.”
“What do you have in mind?”
Pushing her beer away, she ran a hand up his thigh. “Let’s go home,” she purred. “There are things we can do as adults that we would have been terrible at as kids.”
“Speak for yourself. I was born gifted in the sack.”
“Really?”
“No. My first time lasted all of two minutes.”
She laughed. “Think you can improve upon that tonight?”
“Oh, sweetheart,” he said, cupping her face between his palms. “You have no idea the plans I have for us.”
A shiver raced through her. “Promises, promises.”
“Then let me prove them.”
Sliding from the booth, he reached out a hand to her.
Glancing at their initials scribbled into the table, she interlocked her fingers with his. They may have come back to their past, but she was far more interested in their future.
They’d waited long enough to start it.