Chapter Three
“I’m sorry. It sounded like you just said you wouldn’t be in today because Walker Beckett had a baby.”
Clara ran her hand down her face. “Again, yes. That’s the third time you’ve repeated it, Diane.”
“Walker Beckett.”
“Yes.”
“Had a baby.”
“Yes.”
“Do the scientific journals know about him yet?”
She sighed. “Obviously, there was a woman involved.”
“And just to clarify, the woman wasn’t you, right?”
“This right here? This is why people say you shouldn’t be friends with your boss.”
“I’m sorry. I’m trying to wrap my head around this. I thought it was a hoax when I got your email.”
“Which is why I’m calling. I won’t be in the office today, as you can see, but I’ll have the Barlow article to you by Friday, I promise.”
“I assume you’ll be taking more time as this plays out? We’ve got a great maternity package, but I’m not sure it applies to being the best friend of the actual parent.”
She snorted. “You should really take that up with HR at the next meeting.”
“I’ll see that it makes it on the schedule.” The humor dropped from Diane’s voice. “But seriously, Clara, what have you gotten yourself into?”
“Was I just supposed to leave?”
Diane sighed long and slow before saying, “Yes. This isn’t your family.”
She flinched, old memories of a different time and place flashed through her mind. One where she stood at a window looking in on a smiling family that would never open their arms to her… “I know,” she said, dragging her mind back to the present. “But Walker may as well be. All we have is each other.”
“I hate to point this out, but if there is a baby in his life that isn’t yours, that belief isn’t so justified anymore.”
“I said I’d help him for three weeks,” she said, ignoring how Diane’s words stabbed through her. “After that, things will go back to normal.”
“Clara…”
“Normal,” she said more firmly. “I just have to get us through twenty-one days.”
“And then what? Four weeks from now he’s still going to be a father. That’s not a reality that ever goes away.”
No, it doesn’t. No matter how she spun this, normalcy was in the rearview mirror.
“I can’t think long term right now.”
“Well damn,” her boss said. “Okay, get me that piece this week, and I’ll do what I can to clear your schedule. The paper will survive without you for a while, and we can figure out how to best balance this. Maybe you can work remotely.”
“Thanks, Diane. I appreciate the help.”
“I can’t say there’s any precedence for a situation like this. Let’s just take it a day at a time. I do want to meet soon and get the full scoop, though. Preferably with a glass of wine in my hand.”
“I’m buying,” Clara promised.
“The two best words in the English language. Now I’ve got to run. Let me know if you can be in for Tuesday and we’ll take it from there.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“Good. And Clara, remember one thing.”
“What?”
There was a pause before Diane said, “This baby isn’t yours.”
She hissed out a breath. “I know.”
“Good. Then that’s all I’ll say. Give me a call if you need me.”
“Thanks. Will do.”
Disconnecting the call, Clara tossed her cell onto the next pillow. Snuggling back into the guest room’s decadent bed she stared up at the ceiling. It wasn’t the first time she’d slept in this room. She kept a shoebox full of essentials in a corner of the closet for exactly these occasions. Once, one of Walker’s overnight guests had come across it and demanded to know what another woman’s belongings were doing in the room she’d been staying in. Clara smiled as she remembered it was the woman who’d been sent packing, rather than her little emergency box.
Pushing herself out of bed, she retrieved her belongings and fished out a toothbrush and some toothpaste. It was likely a miracle she hadn’t woken to the cries of a baby. She’d set her alarm for only a few hours of sleep but still, either the child was an angel or Walker had been trying to keep the kid quiet. She appreciated the consideration, but she wasn’t sure silence was a good sign from a man this out of his element with a baby.
Hurrying through her morning routine, she shrugged back into her yoga pants and tank top and went searching for her new roommate.
Padding through the penthouse barefoot, she ran down the stairs to the lower level and searched through the sprawling open-concept living space. Not seeing him in either the kitchen or living room, she wandered over to the towering windows and spotted a sight she’d never thought to see.
Out on the balcony Walker bounced a baby in his arms as he paced back and forth.
“Please stop,” she heard him say as she opened the sliding door. “Please be quiet.”
His back was to her, but she didn’t need to see his face to hear the desperation edging his words.
“Name your price. A Ferrari on your eighteenth birthday? Done. Just stop crying now.”
“I don’t think the parenting books recommend bribing your children with European luxury vehicles.”
He glanced over his shoulder. “You’re awake.”
“Yeah. You too by the looks of things. How long have you been up?”
“I don’t think I ever went down,” he replied.
She blinked. “What?”
“He started crying almost immediately,” he said. “I tried to keep him quiet, so I brought him out here since it was a warm morning. I think we might have slept a few minutes here or there, but I’m not entirely sure I didn’t hallucinate them.”
“Okay. Let’s put the tiny life-form down,” Clara said, scooping the baby from his arms. “How about I fix him a bottle and you can get a few minutes’ rest?”
“Are you an angel?”
“If I had a nickel.”
She glanced up at his exhausted face and her heart twisted. He was clearly exhausted yet here he was, doing his best for his child.
He’ll be a good dad.
She’d never thought about Walker that way, but it was true. Once he found his footing, she knew he’d throw himself at this challenge the way he did everything else. And though she’d never pictured him being a father, now she saw things differently.
Things change. Things you never thought would.
It was a dangerous idea. One that opened a door to possibilities she’d spent years trying not to think about.
Stop it. You’re here to be his support. Do your job.
“I’ll meet you in the kitchen when you’re ready,” she said as she turned away.
Holding the baby with sure hands, she left Walker and headed for the kitchen. Soon the newly bought formula was heating on the stove, and a strong pot of coffee brewed on the counter.
“What do you think?” she asked the baby, sitting at the high island table as she waited for their drinks to finish. “Are you going to be a hellion or are you just adjusting to the change in your world?”
She stared down into wide unblinking eyes.
Eyes the same vibrant blue as his father’s.
“Hellion,” she murmured, tracing a finger along one soft, chubby cheek. “You’ll be brilliant like your papa, and it will drive your teachers crazy because they won’t be able to keep up. But you’ll be fine because you’ll come home and tell all your ideas to your dad, and he will help you make them a reality.”
The baby gurgled a response.
“You’ll bat those blue eyes and wrap everyone around your finger. And I’ll get to say I predicted it all the first day we met.”
Won’t I? Fifteen years from now, would she meet the unruly teen the child in her arms would grow into?
“That’s a problem for another day,” she said, her voice high pitched as she cooed to her charge. “One step at a time.”
The timer went off and she went to prep the formula, testing it on her wrist before she offered it to the baby.
“Hungry little thing, aren’t you?”
Rocking the infant, she strolled around the kitchen while he fed, making a mental list of the extras they’d need to buy today. Walker’s driver had done a stellar job getting them through the night, but there was only so much one could buy at midnight.
“More formula, diapers, baby clothes, toys,” she listed off. “We should get you checked out by a pediatrician, too. I’m sure your father will hack the hospital system and find the best doctor in the city. Nothing is too illegal for his little boy, right?”
“Or I could just ask for a referral.”
She spun to see Walker making a beeline for the coffee.
“A referral? How blasé. I was trying to convince your son what a badass he had for a father.”
“I haven’t hacked a government system since our first year of college,” he replied. “You hit me over the head and told me to stop screwing with my future, remember?”
“Sounds like me.”
“Keeping me on the straight and narrow.” He held out a coffee mug to her. Adjusting the baby, she accepted it with relish.
“And look where it landed you,” she said.
“Being a single father terrified a loose couch cushion might smother my kid?”
“I was going to say successful billionaire, but that’s another way to go.”
She sipped her coffee and sighed in pleasure, closing her eyes. Walker always had the best beans. When she wanted to splurge on coffee, she’d go to a designer coffee shop and buy a tiny bag of an exotic flavor. Walker flew the damn things in directly from whatever plantation caught his fancy.
Yet another reason she often strung late movie-watching nights into sleepovers. Walker had all the best toys, and she wasn’t above using him for his coffee connections.
“The coffee cake you like is in the fridge.”
“I saw,” she said with a smile. “Nice perk.”
“It’s worth my while to keep it stocked for the month.”
She opened her eyes, glancing at her friend. Tension radiated from him as exhaustion lined his face. Unable to stop herself, she crossed to him and traced a soft finger along his jaw.
“You don’t have to do that,” she told him softly. “I promised I’d stay and I will, regardless of how much cake you keep on hand.”
A tiny smile tugged the corner of his mouth. “I can’t do this without you. Last night proves it.”
“Last night was this little guy’s first night in a new place. He’ll settle once he learns his new routine. Besides, you should have called me. I might have been able to help.”
“Couldn’t.”
“Why?” she asked, exasperated.
He glanced away. “Why give you one more reason to run from this apartment?”
Her head jerked up. “What?”
Blue eyes so like the baby’s in her arms met hers. “I know what I asked of you isn’t easy. It goes beyond anything I’ve ever asked of anyone, and you agreed because you’re a decent person. I didn’t want to test that resolve your first night here.”
“Because you thought I’d toss my hands in the air and, what? Succumb to a fit of vapors?”
“I thought you’d make the logical choice and tell me to go to hell.”
“Love isn’t logical.” His eyes widened and she hurried to correct the words that had slipped out. “Platonic love, that is. You’re my best friend, Walker. You know how much I care about you.”
A low sigh left him. “I know.”
Slinging an arm around her shoulders, he pressed an off-handed kiss into her hair.
Platonic. Yeah right.
Hush, she chided her own mind. His world had just upended itself. Now wasn’t the time to…
To what? Get weak kneed at the sight of him with a baby in his arms?
Mentally, she shook her head. Now was the worst possible time to see him as anything other than her oldest friend.
Wasn’t it?
“I’m not going anywhere,” she said, staring up at him. “Not for three weeks. Use me as a resource while I’m here so you can function when I leave.”
His gaze darkened. “Let’s not think about that.”
“You of all people should know ignoring reality doesn’t make it disappear.”
“Yes, but a reality where I’m alone isn’t one I want to dwell on.”
“I’ll still be just a speed dial away,” she said, her gaze skidding away from his.
“Yeah.” But his tone wasn’t much more convincing than hers.
Luckily, the baby in her arms decided he was done with his bottle.
“Here,” she said, passing it to Walker while she threw a dish towel over her shoulder and shifted the baby.
“How do you know how to do all this?” Walker said, watching her.
“There’s nothing to it,” she replied, rubbing the child’s back. “I told you my mother always had me helping with my siblings. Looks like it’s still second nature.”
“Good because I have no idea where to start.”
She smiled. “Doctor, nanny, shopping. Not necessarily in that order.”
“On it.”
As Walker went off to find his laptop, she patted the baby’s back.
“We’ll be all right,” she said to him. “Just you wait. Everything will be okay, little one. I promise.”
It was the only option. She’d get through her three weeks, and then Walker and his son would be fine.
Just like she and Walker would be fine.
Because he was right. Any other reality wasn’t worth considering.
…
Walker strode into his workshop, grabbing one of the laptops not synced up into his elaborate network. Every screen, every wire was exactly where he wanted it.
And looking at it now all he could see was a death trap. What if the baby pulled a cord and a computer tower fell on him? Or he might stick his tongue in one of the many custom-built electrical sockets. He’d read about children doing that, though at the time it had just seemed like survival of the fittest in the twenty-first century, but now that he had a life of his own to protect, everything was glaringly more real.
“Doctor, nanny, shopping,” he repeated to himself. He was an expert at research.
Though Clara was the one who had managed to make the baby’s crying stop in seconds.
I’d trade superpowers in a heartbeat.
Grabbing the computer, he retraced his steps to the living room. There he saw his new roommate settling his son on one of the fluffy blankets his driver had dropped off last night. She was utterly at ease as she leaned over the little body.
His steps slowed as he took in the sight. He’d never thought of Clara having children. He’d known he never would and had just assumed it was the same for her.
But seeing her now, he realized how ridiculous he’d been to think what worked for him would for her.
There was no impatience in her face as she grinned down at the baby, making different expressions to make the child coo in delight. Her body language was relaxed as she slipped back into a role he knew she’d tried to put behind her. For all their years together, he’d been told only the bare minimum about her childhood. She’d helped raise her mother’s second family and left it all behind the moment she turned eighteen. Beyond that, all he had were vague references and the overlying assumption that her past hadn’t been much rosier than his.
It was part of the reason he’d been drawn to her in the first place.
But she’s not like me. I would have been fine with a lifetime of my computers and casual partners, but not her.
She needed more. A family, a home.
A partner by her side.
He tamped down the stirrings of panic that rose within him at the thought of such a permanent future. He’d seen firsthand the horror that came from being trapped in a relationship that didn’t work. He’d never be willing do that to either of them.
But someone would come along and offer her the life he never could. His chest felt hollow at the thought.
That’s life. It’s the way it should be. It shouldn’t bother you to picture her with a husband.
But it did.
She’s your friend. You made that decision years ago. You can’t think about her any other way.
She glanced up to see him staring at her. “He seems pretty healthy, but I think a doctor should be our first stop today,” she said.
“Agreed.” He knew nothing about his son. At least a clean bill of health would be a starting point.
“And he needs a name,” she said, wiggling her fingers to catch the baby’s attention.
Again, the breath froze in his lungs. A name. He’d struggled all night to think of a fitting one and nothing had clicked.
“Is there a family name you wanted to pass down?” she asked.
He swallowed back the bile in his throat. “No.” The word was said with too much vehemence, causing Clara to arch a questioning brow.
“Have you ever heard a name you particularly liked?”
“I was never the type to daydream about baby names.”
“No,” she said, her eyes on her charge. “Me, neither.”
“What would you name him?”
That earned him a glare. “I am not naming your son.”
He held up his hands in peace. “I was just asking for suggestions.”
Sighing, she looked back at the baby. “I don’t know. There are the old standards. Andrew, Alex, Matthew, all totally acceptable.”
“And boring.”
“John, Luke, Sam?”
“Dull, tedious, tiresome.”
“You know there are whole books dedicated to baby names. Go buy one and insult it instead.”
He dropped to the carpet next to her. “We can’t keep calling him ‘baby.’”
She chewed on her lower lip the way she did when she was thinking. He’d half thought her lips would be permanently bruised from college, but it’d never been the case.
No, they were as full and pink as they’d ever been.
Beautiful. Just like Clara was.
Danger. Don’t think about her that way.
She was his oldest friend and therefore off-limits. It was a promise he’d made to himself before he’d even dropped out of college. If he were lucky enough to keep her in his life, he’d never screw it up by wishing for anything more. He knew the pain and regret that lay down that road, and he never wanted that for them. Far better to be her friend than lose her entirely.
She stopped gnawing on her lip and looked up at him, a hesitance in her eyes.
“What?” he asked.
“I’ve always liked Hunter. And it kinda works well with your own name. You know, a little symmetry to link you two.”
He paused, considering. He didn’t hate it on principle as he had the others. And he also liked how it fit with his own name. This child had few enough connections to him as it was. But a name was permanent, no matter how the rest of the childhood unfolded. They’d always have a tie.
“I like it,” he said. “Hunter Beckett. It works.”
Her smile lit up her face before regret crossed her expressive features. “Hell. I just named your child, didn’t I?”
“Looks that way.”
She sighed, long and hard. “Do you have a single conventional bone in your body?”
He glanced down at the baby he’d never known he had. “Doesn’t seem like it.”
“Well, at least you’ll benefit,” she said to Hunter. “Yes, you will. When your daddy drives you crazy you can run to Auntie Clara and tell me all about it. I can’t wait till you’re old enough to commiserate.”
“I can see I’ll have to watch in case you twist his mind against me.”
“Yep. I’ll teach him to follow schedules, to return calls, and to eat meals while he does his inventing.” She picked up the baby and bounced him in her arms. “And condoms. I’m going to teach you all about using condoms, little guy.” He winced. “It wasn’t quite like—”
She leveled him with a bland stare. “I know how babies are made. Do you?”
“I might not always be as careful as I should be.”
She snorted.
“But my partners always told me they were on the pill.”
Her brows rose. “Partners?”
Way to blow it, Beckett.
“I just meant—”
“Who is Hunter’s mother?”
Maybe you’ll luck out and the floor will open and swallow you whole.
“There may be a few candidates.”
“Are you kidding me?” She set Hunter on his blanket, gurgling happily, and stood. “You don’t even know who your own baby mama is?”
“The math alone would suggest it’s likely—”
She raised her hand sharply, cutting him off. “You’re supposed to be an eccentric nerd. Where the hell did you get this much game?”
“Easy access to a yacht helps.”
“Dammit, Walker.”
“I know, I know.” He held up his hands in peace. “I’ll be more careful in the future.”
Her eyes narrowed before she turned her back on him. “At least you’ve got the money to open a children’s home if more babies in baskets end up on your doorstep.”
“Come on. That’s a stretch.”
She glanced back. “And two days ago, how likely did you think it would be to have a baby on your floor?” Parting shot delivered, she lifted her chin and sailed from the room.
Walker crouched down by his son, giving the baby his finger to grasp. “I’ll say this for you, little man,” he said. “You’ve got an aunt who’ll keep you in check even if you run roughshod over me.” He stared at the doorway she’d slipped through. “And she’ll be your rock if you let her.”
Just like she’d always been his.