Windsor wins the homecoming game. After a lousy first half with no points up on the board, they turned it around in the second half with four touchdowns, including one made by Holden, to seize the win they so desperately needed. The bleachers went wild. Everyone was on their feet, cheering so loudly you could feel the stand rumbling as the Windsor players celebrated down on the field. The look of pure relief on Holden’s face was priceless. He played great, and so did Jaden.
“God, it’s so cold,” Will murmurs through chattering teeth as he hugs his arms to his chest. It’s dark and extremely windy, with the temperatures continuing to plummet as the night wears on, and he’s shivering in his T-shirt as we wait around for Holden and Jaden.
It’s nearing 10PM and the parking lot is emptying out. Most of the crowd has already left, but there are still a few groups of people lingering around, waiting for friends. Will, Dani and I have been waiting for what feels like forever, pacing in circles to pass the time. Will is freezing to death out here, so I step in front of him, pressing my body against his and wrapping my arms around his back in an attempt to radiate some warmth. He immediately shoves his hands into the front pouch of my hoodie.
“Tonight wasn’t actually that bad,” Dani muses. She’s sitting on the ground, hugging her legs and wrapped up warm in Jaden’s huge sweatshirt. She’s staring at the ground, tracing patterns on the concrete with her middle finger. She pauses and glances up. “Thanks, Kenzie. I’m going to try and come to every game for the rest of the season.”
“Really? That’s awesome.”
Right then, someone lets out a long, low whistle, and when I crane my neck, I see Holden confidently striding toward us. Unlike the past couple of weeks, he’s smiling for once, even though his expression is more smug than anything else. I love when Holden’s in a good mood, and after his touchdown tonight, I think he’ll be happy and content for the rest of the week.
“Don’t tell me that touchdown wasn’t incredible, because it was,” he boasts, fueling his ego as he runs a newly busted hand through his hair. “That Greeley West kid had no chance of catching up to me!”
Rolling my eyes, I step back from Will and turn around, rushing over and pulling Holden into a hug. “Well done!” I say, and he briefly hugs me back, although not as tightly. Cocky Holden is much, much better than grouchy Holden.
“You did alright,” Will says with a shrug. Holden steps around me and fixes him with a menacing glower until Will cracks into laughter and tells him, “You played great, man.”
“Thanks,” Holden says, and in effort to get back at him, he condescendingly pats Will on the head. “I know I did.” Sliding the strap of his gym bag further up his shoulder, he stuffs a hand into the pocket of his shorts and asks, “So what’s the plan?” But before either of us can reply, he finally spots Dani, who’s still sitting on the ground a few feet away and watching us carefully. He blurts out, “Dani? What are you doing here?”
“Kenzie invited me to the game with her,” Dani answers. She pushes herself up from the ground and straightens up in front of us, and the wind blows her dark hair across her face.
Holden immediately twists his neck to look at me, his eyes wide as though he can’t believe I have invited Dani out again. I can understand why he looks so confused, given that I was the one who asked him and Will to stay clear of the Hunters, and he looks down at the ground, stuffing his hands into his pockets.
Luckily, I don’t have to explain myself again like last Friday night, because behind me, I hear Jaden’s voice call out, “Hey!” and Dani quickly runs past me, most likely desperate to get away from Holden, who’s mumbling, “Him too?”
I decide to ignore Holden completely, because his reaction is unwarranted. Somehow he has managed to dampen the mood within the space of four seconds, just from the look he has given me. I force my smile back onto my face as I turn around to look at Jaden instead. To no one’s surprise, he’s dressed in black jeans again and a maroon Windsor Wizards hoodie, the exact same one as mine. His attention is all on Dani as she quickly approaches him, congratulating him on the team’s win, and it’s so adorable how pleased he is to see her. That’s two weeks in a row now that she’s come along to the game.
“Isn’t this mine?” he asks suspiciously, grabbing a fistful of the sweatshirt she’s wearing. Dani just shrugs, and he jokingly shakes his head at her while letting go of the fabric. That’s when he finally glances over Dani’s shoulder, settling his bright eyes on me. “Not gonna lie,” he says, motioning between Dani and me, “I really didn’t expect to see you two together.”
“Me either,” Dani admits quietly, briefly looking over at me. “But I thought I’d give her a chance.”
I playfully nudge her, then give her a little cuddle as I look back at Jaden. Really I want to hug him, but I know it would be too forward in the current situation, so I stuff my hands into the front pouch of my hoodie instead to stop myself from involuntarily touching him. “Well done on the win,” I say, our eyes locked. “Those tackles? Pretty badass if you ask me.”
“Not so badass when you fuck up your shoulder,” he points out, placing his hand over his hoodie near his collarbone and massaging the area for emphasis, his warm, playful eyes never leaving mine.
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Will and Holden watching me closely. Will’s head is cocked to one side as he studies us, whereas Holden has his fist pressed to his mouth, blinking rapidly, his cheeks still red from the adrenaline of the game. He drops his hand, steps forward and mumbles, “Kenzie, we’re leaving.” Then, he frantically nudges Will in the ribs. “Will, c’mon, get your keys out,” he says quietly.
“Where are we going?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest. Last I heard, we hadn’t made any plans yet, but Holden seems to be in a rush to get out of here. He probably doesn’t want the Hunters tagging along with us again, but I do.
“I don’t know. McDonalds,” Holden answers. Will hesitantly reaches into his pocket for the keys to his Jeep, glancing between Holden and me, unsure if we’re leaving or not. “C’mon, I’ll buy you your Big Mac.”
I look to Will for help, but he just shrugs, holding his hands up, refusing to join the debate. Then I look back at Jaden and Dani, who seem uncomfortable. I hate being stuck in the middle like this, being forced to decide whether to leave with my friends or stay with Jaden. I did promise Jaden I would meet him after the game, and I really don’t want to bail after a couple of minutes, not just because I keep my promises, but because I really want to spend time with him.
“Why don’t we . . . why don’t we all go together?”
“Kenzie,” Holden whines, poised to make a dash for the Jeep. “Can’t the three of us just hang out?” he asks, his voice quiet as he reaches for the keys and steals them out of Will’s hand.
“Holden,” Jaden calls out, and Holden immediately glances up with a flash of bewilderment on his face at the sound of Jaden saying his name. But Jaden’s not smiling anymore. He looks really pissed for once. “What the hell is your problem?”
“Let’s just go,” Dani mumbles, reaching for him and tugging at his arm. Despite the relaxed, happy mood she was in a few minutes ago, she’s now suddenly back to her wary, reserved self. She keeps her head down a little, a deep frown etched into her face as she tries to get Jaden to leave with her. It’s clear she doesn’t want to be here anymore, and I can’t blame her.
Holden tightens his fist around Will’s keys so hard that his knuckles pale from the pressure, and he narrows his eyes at Jaden. “I just wanna hang out with Kenzie and Will, man,” he mumbles, barely audible.
Jaden looks even more baffled as he stares back at Holden. I think he is losing his patience now. “Dude, just say that then. If you’re so desperate to leave, then leave already. You’re putting a downer on everyone’s good mood anyway.”
Holden is glaring at him now, looking pissed off at Jaden having dared to talk back to him. I doubt he was expecting it, and for a few seconds he looks as though he is contemplating replying, but he doesn’t. He keeps quiet and instead turns to me. “Kenzie, are you coming with us?”
“No. Jaden can take me home,” I state. I don’t know why Holden is behaving like this. He can’t keep acting like a petulant child whenever it suits him, and I’m not leaving with Will and Holden if Jaden isn’t welcome to join. I’d rather Jaden just took me home himself. Holden releases a long, heavy sigh and then simply shakes his head at me.
“Let’s go,” he mutters, nudging Will forward, forcing him to leave with him. Will rolls his eyes at me as we exchange a small nod of agreement, and then he and Holden turn around and begin to walk away, headed back toward the Jeep.
“Just because you scored a touchdown for once doesn’t mean you can act like a dick!” Jaden calls after them, raising his voice to ensure Holden hears. He rolls his eyes, and it is clear he is annoyed. I can’t blame him: Holden wasn’t exactly subtle about the fact that he doesn’t want Jaden and Dani around.
Holden almost twists back around, but Will grabs him and forces him to keep moving forward until they disappear around the corner of the school building. I’m left alone with Jaden and Dani, and if this was a month ago, I’d be sprinting halfway across town by this point. But not anymore. It feels more like Holden is the one who’s unpredictable to be around now.
“What’s wrong with him?” Dani asks. She looks aggrieved and upset as she waits for me to offer an explanation for Holden’s erratic behavior.
Unfortunately, I don’t have one, so all I can do is apologize on his behalf. “I’m sorry about him. I don’t know what his issue is, but I’ll talk to him about it.” It really is starting to get cold, so I pull my hoodie tighter around me, yanking the hood up over my head. My eyes find Jaden’s and he’s already staring at me, though he still looks full of residual anger. “You really don’t mind taking me home?”
“Kenzie,” is all he says as he rolls his eyes, and then he reaches into the pocket of his jeans and pulls out the keys to the Corolla, nodding across the near-empty lot. “Let’s go.”
The three of us stroll across the cold lot toward the car, though Dani walks slightly ahead of us, and she even lets me ride shotgun. As she climbs into the back seat, she peers around the back of Jaden’s headrest and says, “You can drop me off first.” She leans back and pulls on her seatbelt, and when I glance over my shoulder at her, she gives me a small, knowing smile. It reminds me of the way Dani used to be before, back when she would teasingly kiss the air in front of me whenever Jaden’s back was turned, back when she would wink and offer to give us some space, back when she would ask when we were going to hurry up and get together already.
“I was going to dump your ass back at the house first anyway,” Jaden tells her with a hearty laugh as he starts up the engine. Dani promptly stretches forward and flicks the back of his ear, and I smile as I watch the two of them bickering.
Sometimes I really hate being an only child. I’ve grown up missing out on the fun of a playful sibling rivalry and the sharing of deep secrets and the feeling of knowing someone was always going to have my back. I thought that I was finally going to have all of that, but then I never did. I try not to think about it too much as Jaden pulls out of the school grounds, heating on full blast, radio on low, and heads toward his grandparents’ house to drop Dani off so that we can be alone at last. Just the thought of it has my heart beating that tiny bit faster.