I don’t know what came over me, asking Zara to coffee. My intent was to thank her for coming over and once that sentence was typed out my fingers took over, adding the part about getting coffee. I didn’t even think about it until I looked at the blue bubble and felt a bout of anxiety start to take over as I realized that I probably overstepped the imaginary line in a new relationship. Not that we’re in one or ever will be, but I want to be her friend because I think she could use one right about now.

My mama saw the horror on my face as I was looking at my phone and took it from me. I expected her to chide me, to remind me that the mother of my children had just died and that I should be thinking about them, but she didn’t. She smiled and said that she liked Zara.

Thing is, I like her too and I can’t figure out why. She is nothing like me or the women I’ve dated in the past and the complete opposite of Iris. Truthfully, that scares the shit out of me because after talking to her yesterday, she is nowhere near ready for any guy, let alone someone like me.

I have never understood why people cheat. My parents, both sets of grandparents, and Barbara and her husband have all been married forever. That was what I wanted when I married Iris. Even though we were young, I was determined to make it work. She said fame changed me and she was probably right, but it changed us. She never complained about the money that was coming in or the fancy clothes she got to buy. Iris never worried about buying the girls everything they needed or wondered if she’d have money to buy groceries. My fame took care of all that. It wasn’t until she decided she wasn’t happy that it became a problem for her.

Still, sitting in the back corner of the coffee shop, I wonder if I made the right decision by asking Zara to coffee. Even with her immediate response of yes, I’m still second-guessing everything every time the door chimes bang against the glass as the door is pushed open, only to have this instant let down that she hasn’t shown up yet. And still my heart picks up pace when I see someone with platinum hair walking by the window, only to notice that the purple on the end is missing. My leg bounces anxiously each time I check the time, only to realize that I am very early and she still has five minutes until our set meeting time.

Of course, I start thinking about what happens when she doesn’t show. Do I text her again? Call her? Walk out of here with my tail between my legs and tell myself I gave it the ole Boy Scout try?

Or do I get all excited and embrace my rapidly beating heart and sweaty palms as she stalks toward me with a smile so bright that it could light up Music Row? What I end up doing is stumbling over the leg of the table, jabbing my thigh and biting my tongue to keep from crying out as I walk toward her to give her a kiss on the cheek. I’m as smooth as they come, I tell ya.

“Are you okay?” she asks. I’m slightly embarrassed that she saw my epic blunder. I nod as casually as possible and take a few deep breaths, hoping to push away the throbbing pain in my leg. I pull out her chair and wait for her to sit down before I gingerly return to my seat. Zara is dressed as inconspicuously as possible. Her long hair is hidden under a beanie and the make-up she wore yesterday is nothing like what she has one now. The bold, vibrant colors are gone and replaced by subtlety. She looks angelic and completely different than the woman I met yesterday, and I have a feeling that I like both.

“I wish I could say I’m as graceful as Stormy when she dances, but that would be a fib.”

Zara laughs, and the sound shoots straight to my heart. I like the way it makes me feel and have a feeling that I may be blushing. “It’s something I’ve done many times, and I’m sure it’ll happen again,” she says, trying to ease my awkwardness. She doesn’t, but I don’t let on. I have a feeling anything that she does, is done so with as much elegance as humanly possible.

“What can I get ya to drink?” I ask her, and as I do, I find myself leaning forward so that we’re closer.

“Just black.”

“Really?” I’m slightly shocked by this. “None of that fancy crap women are always drinking?”

Zara shakes her head and in the process pulls her lower lip between her teeth briefly. “Too much sugar and it seems so unnatural. I never go into the trend of drinking coffee like that.”

“Two black coffees it’ll be. I’ll be right back.”

As I stand in line, I casually glance at her to see what she’s doing. I figured she’d pull out her phone to pass the time, but she doesn’t. Her hands are folded and resting on the table, and she’s watching me. I keep my eyes on her, trying to figure out why I’m so drawn to her until the woman behind me asks me to step forward because I’m next in line. I place my order and step aside, casually looking back at where Zara is sitting, but turning away before she can see me gawking at her.

With two cups of hot coffee in hand, I carefully make my way back to our small table. I’m pleasantly surprised that there isn’t a line in front of her asking for her autograph. Last night after she left, Stormy and Willow filled me in on how insanely popular she was and how I was way out of her league, not to mention that she was married to her high school sweetheart and I’d never stand a chance. I didn’t bother filling the girls in about Zara’s marital woes because it’s not my place nor did I tell them their daddy is fairly popular on the country music scene and that if we were back in Nashville things would be different. I just let them go on thinking that I’m ordinary. I suppose to them I am because I’m their daddy and they don’t see me the same way they see Zara.

“Here ya go,” I say as I set her mug down. She wraps her hands around the ceramic and pulls it toward her, bending her head slightly. “Smell good?” I ask as I sit down.

“Very. This is my favorite place.”

“It’s my first time here. Tell me why you like it.” I change the way I’m sitting so that I’m somewhat closer to her. I don’t know if I’m flirting or not. Or whether I should even let that word into my thoughts. I know she’s not ready to be hit on, but I can’t help myself.

“They don’t allow paparazzi in here or allow them to take pictures through the windows.”

“Are you bothered a lot by the media?” I ask.

Zara shrugs. “Sometimes. Right now I’m top news because of what Van did, but normally they take my picture if they see me shopping or something. Right now they’re camped out in front of my house, making me miserable.”

“I’m sorry.”

She smiles softly. “It’s not like that for you in Nashville?”

I sit back and fiddle with the handle on my mug. “Life in Tennessee is laid back. If I’m walkin’ down the street, people say hey like we’ve been friends for years. The paparazzi really don’t bother us unless there’s somethin’ big going on. Plus it probably helps that I live on over twenty acres of land away from everyone else.”

“Wow, that must be so nice. The solitude.”

“Or it’s borin’. Honestly, unless I’m on tour my life is fairly monotonous. I eat, sleep, write, and record. I rarely leave my land.”

“Do you have horses? I’ve always wanted to ride one.”

“I do. Want to take a trip to Nashville and learn to ride?” I look away quickly and wish I could take my question back. To avoid looking at her, I pick up my mug and take a drink, wishing I were anywhere but here right now. The last thing I want to do is put her in a position to turn me down or find some excuse as to why she can’t randomly take a trip to Nashville.

“I’d actually like that, Levi. I like the idea of getting away where no one would bother me, where I could walk outside and not worry about the paparazzi hiding behind my bushes to take my photos.” She too picks up her mug and drinks, almost as if she’s avoiding my response.

“As I told you last night, I’m here, Zara.”

“When can we leave?” she asks, throwing me off a bit.

“Um…”

Zara looks around before she leans closer and motions for me to do the same. “Here’s the thing. Van told me last night that he’s about to enter some rehab for sex addicts and I’d really like to disappear when he does that. I don’t want to be here when that happens. I don’t want the press hounding me for a reaction nor do I want to have to deal with my label. I want to disappear,” she says barely above a whisper.

As much as I want to tell her that we can leave in an hour, I can’t do that to the girls. I promised them we’d wait until school was out before I made them go back to Nashville.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I’m overstepping.”

“You’re not,” I say as I reach for her hand. Once again, I rest mine on top of hers for a brief second, hoping to convey that I’m okay with her asking to go to my place in Nashville.

“Maybe I’m the one overstepping,” I tell her. “I assumed you’d want me to go with you and right now I can’t leave because I promised the girls that I’d let them finish out the school year. Believe me; I would love to get the hell out of Hollywood and be back on my ranch.”

“I expected you to go with me,” she tells me with a smile, and now I feel like she’s flirting with me, but I know better.

“I want too, but Stormy and Willow…”

“I understand, Levi. But if I disappear know that I’ll be back after he’s out of rehab.”

I don’t want her to disappear. I know I’ve only known her for two days but can’t imagine not seeing her a few times a week, even if it’s only for coffee.

“Let me talk to my ma and see if she doesn’t mind staying with the girls for a bit. We can fly to Nashville, and once I have you set up on the ranch, I can come back. I’ll let you know later today. Is that okay?”

Zara smiles brightly and just like that, the gloom that was lingering over us for a moment is gone. She finishes her coffee and motions toward the door. I do the same and quickly follow her out.

“I apologize now if they take your photo.”

“I’m used to it,” I tell her as I pull my cap lower. She does the same with her hat and takes off toward the park with me by her side. We get about ten feet away before her name is being called and a slew of questions are being tossed her way, asking about Van, their divorce and whether they’ll reconcile. She just walks faster and keeps her head down. I realize how bad it must be for her, especially with everything that is going on her with husband.