A few days later. Albuquerque New Mexico. Veterans and family affairs law firm.
After taking a day to get myself together when I first arrived in Albuquerque, I’ve now gone to the law firm in Albuquerque specializing in veteran and family affairs. The law firm I was referred to by the receptionist in New York, who has friends Brynn and Riley at the helm.
Despite my anxiety, it was really easy to schedule an appointment with Riley. Even on such short notice as I did. He opened up space for me with no problem.
Just shy of 1 o’clock, I walk in through the doors and to the receptionist desk. The man stationed behind the computer seems to know who I am before I’ve even introduced myself. He is dressed very snazzy. Gray suit, great time and bright pink dress shirt. Matching gray dress shoes. “Here to see Riley?”
I nod, folding my hands awkwardly. I’m actually in a skirt and blouse today. Something I haven’t worn in forever.
“Miss Juliet Rez, I presume?”
I nod again, and the male receptionist stands up from his roller chair and escorts me to a very fancy-looking office. With the name Riley Smith on a gold plaque right outside.
He knocks lightly on the door frame, immediately catching the attention of another nicely dressed man seated in a large mahogany desk. Unlike a lot of men that I’ve seen working in and around military affairs, his hair is a little longer than most. Actually has enough to put it up in a tiny ponytail. His face is clean-shaven though. Sharp-featured. Gorgeous. Like a velociraptor and a Prince put together. Lots of angles. Yellow-gold eyes, and a mouth and nose that’s almost as slim as his cheeks and chin. Still, he’s not as ruggedly gorgeous or muscled as Brandon.
As he comes over to guide me into his office, I feel embarrassed. Angry at myself for lusting at him, even after I abandoned him. Ran away without a single word as to why.
“Juliet, correct?”
“Yes, that’s me,” I say quietly as he takes my hand and dismisses the receptionist.
“Really glad that you could come and see me today,” he adds, closing the door quietly behind us and leading me to an overstuffed chair in front of his desk. As he guides and places me in to the chair and takes his place back behind his desk, he smiles. Relaxes his posture, and takes out a folder he started for me. “We can definitely help you out with your father’s estate and any other legal documentation in regards to the execution of his will and testament.” He flips through the papers he has. “We can definitely also help you file the paperwork, and find the necessary other people to help you manage his assets, if that’s something you also need help with.”
I nod. “I will need help with managing his assets. Particularly the house in Albuquerque.” I pause, hating the knife of sadness that goes through my heart here. That was my childhood home. That was my safe space. But I know it has to be sold. That, and everything else in it. It’s the only way I’m gonna have enough money for the baby in six months’ time when it’s born. The medical bills. Hospital bills. Food, clothing medicines. “It needs to be sold sooner rather than later. Everything else needs to go, too.”
Riley nods somberly. “That’s fine. That’s fine. We have people we can get to help you with that.” He clears his throat. “But first, we need to file the paperwork that will allow you to get the money he set aside for you and your mom. Two separate amounts. So, I’m gonna need to have you sign these documents for me.” Saying this, he brings out a small stack of papers from the folio, and displays them across my part of the desk. He hands me a shiny looking pen, which I take and sign without reading too much of. “Now, there will be fees and other things associated with me doing this work for you, miss Juliet.” He pauses, seeing my bit of hesitation. “But if you work for the foundation — the charity that we do work through — New Hope Veteran’s Association — if you volunteer for us there, we’ll cover your legal fees for you then you won’t have to pay anything for any paperwork with file, any people we get to help you liquidate assets, that kind of thing.”
I almost laugh out loud. I can’t be sure, but that sounds like the same charity, Association, that Brandon was trying to get me to get up with before I ran out on him with the baby he doesn’t know I have. I almost laugh out loud, but I don’t. The most I do is hum. And to think I tried everything to treat the charity as if it had nothing to do with me. As if I had nothing of value that I wanted or needed to give. And here it is again. Here they are again, asking me to help out with their cause. But this time I don’t have a choice. I don’t have enough money of my own to be picky.
“There is a conference coming up,” says Riley. “A good friend of mine, Brandon Whitley, will be speaking at it. You should go. Listen to him speak. See what we do. See what the Association does, and see what you can do to help out. Explain who your father was, what he did, that kind of thing and I’m sure everyone there will be willing to give you a helping hand.” He smiles, completely oblivious to the roller coaster happening in my stomach. “Especially Brandon. He’s a good guy. He really does like to help those in need. And I’m sure he’ll also feel especially connected to you, Juliet. He has a soft spot for ladies like you.”
I sigh internally. I know. Oh, do I know. And this woman walked out on him. Out loud I say, “I’ll go to the conference. Just let me know the day and time, and I’ll be there.”
Riley completely brightens. “Great!” He takes the paperwork I’ve just signed for him, and assigns it himself. Sticking it back in my folder, he adds, “well, since we’ve gotten all of this going for today, let’s just see how things go for you after the conference. Okay?”
“Okay.” As I say this, I have to work extra hard not to pay attention to the sickness in my stomach. The knotting happening up there. I get up, hoping movement will help. Either that, or that I will be out of his nice office before I throw up. “Thank you so much for your help, Riley. Thank you so much for taking the time to see me on such short notice.”
Riley jumps up from his chair and hurries to open the door for me. “You’re so welcome, Juliet. We’re so glad to be able to help the daughter of such a dedicated seal like your father.” I nod, and walk out the door he’s holding up for me.
“See you again soon,” I say.
“You bet!” he says, and closes his door.
As I walk past the receptionist’s desk and back out into the New Mexico spring, it hits me what I’ve agreed to. I’ve agreed to come face-to-face with him again. With Brandon.
A huge part of me doesn’t want to see or hear anything from him. I’m afraid of how angry he’ll be. Or how distant he’ll be, but I know I have to go. The baby deserves to know. The baby deserves to have a relationship with his or her father, no matter what I feel or think. The baby wasn’t the one acting stupid. I was. We were. They shouldn’t have to pay for that. I lost my daddy to war. My baby shouldn’t lose his or her daddy because we are choosing to be distant. There’s enough pain in this world. I don’t want to add to it.
I also don’t want to have to explain why I didn’t even try to my baby. I know they would ask me later.