Rhett — 12
It was amazing to think that I’d now been married two whole years. Not only that, Logan and I were parents. To twins. That was still setting in a week later. Ash and Abi were a whole week old now, and it was our second wedding anniversary as well as New Year’s Eve. Combine all of those and what do you have? Two exhausted, tired daddies.
Last week we’d agreed we were going to order pizza, and Logan was going to run into Crooked Bend for it. But now he didn’t even have to do that. Sean had volunteered to do that for us. He and Jasper were in their office in town, catching up on some blueprints and ordering supplies and materials since Collin was in California with his family and husband. He said he was picking up pizza for him and Simon, so he’d be happy to do it for us as well.
That worked out for us. Also, I knew Sean was hoping for a peek at the twins while he was here. I smiled at that thought. I was currently sitting on the couch, watching the twins sleep in their portable crib that we’d put in the living room. I was supposed to be folding the basket of baby clothes, but I just didn’t have the energy and I was seriously considering taking a nap.
Logan was somewhere on the ranch, doing his sexy-as-fuck cowboy thing, and I was still thinking about napping. The more I thought about it, the better it sounded. After all, they said you were supposed to sleep when the baby slept, right? And the clothes would still be there when I woke up.
Giving in, I decided a nap did sound like the way to go, so I kicked off my shoes and simply plopped down on the couch. I was completely exhausted because the next thing I was coherent enough to comprehend was Logan sitting in the curve of the sectional, holding Abi. That got me up faster than I cared to admit.
“Is she…”
“She’s fine. I came in and you were sound asleep, but you stirred when I covered you up.” I looked down and realized the throw blanket was on me, and that was why I felt so comfortable. Leather couch, sweats and oversized shirt, and my favorite fleece blanket.
“What time is it?”
“Probably a little after four. Sean texted and said he’d be here with the pizza in about thirty minutes.”
I nodded as I got up and dropped the blanket on the arm of the couch as I left the living room, headed for the bathroom so I could empty my bladder. Once that was complete, I washed my hands and then went to the kitchen to warm up a pair of bottles. It seemed like that was all I ever did anymore.
“Munchkin?” I turned and looked at my husband. I still didn’t know how such a large man could be so stealthy at times. He was still holding Abi, who was now squirming in his arms. “I’m going to change her, and then I’ll change Ash while you feed Abi, all right?”
“I’ll get Ash. I’ll be in in just a few. I’m just waiting on the warmer.”
“I don’t want you to think you have to do everything, Rhett. You watched them all afternoon. Most of the morning, too.”
“It’s okay. I don’t mind. It’s not like it’s a chore to watch our kids,” I told him while making a shooing motion with my hands. He took the hint and walked off with Abi. I wasn’t far behind with the bottles, and I sat them both down on the oversized ottoman we had in the living room before I went and picked up Ash. He was still sleeping, but I knew it was time for him to have a bottle, so I woke him up. His diaper was wet anyway, so I knew it was unquestionably time for a change.
Once his umbilical cord stump was cleaned, as well as the foreskin, I closed the diaper and I was fastening it when a thought hit me.
“You know, your offer to change Ash is surprising since you seem to struggle to do it without getting hosed on.”
“I’m not fast enough cleaning under his foreskin before he’s peeing again.”
“You’re not going to hurt him, you know,” I told Logan as I sat down and picked up the waiting bottle.
“I realize that. I’ll get there. It’s only been a week. But if you keep taking him to change, I won’t get any more experience,” Logan said teasingly. He was right though. I needed to remember he had tons of experience from helping with our nieces.
“Fine. You can change and feed Ash next time. Deal?”
“Yes. So, you going to fall asleep on me tonight, or are you going to let me kiss you at midnight?”
“I hope I’m awake for kisses, but I make no promises. I’m just so tired all of the time. I’m sorry, Logan.”
“Don’t be. We might need to see the doctor and see if it’s normal. I realize you’re doing a lot more than I am where the twins are concerned, and you need to let me help more.”
“You’re busy as it is. You have a lot to do around the ranch,” I argued, but the idea of more help with the babies or even just the house sounded like heaven.
“There will always be something to do around the ranch. It’s how it works. But our kids are only a week old. Technically, I should still be on paternity leave with you. Boone agrees and he doesn’t want me out on the ranch again for at least two more weeks.”
“Mmm, two more weeks of help sounds nice. I could certainly go for that.” I smiled at Logan, who nodded. I didn’t want to break his trust, and the first way to do that was to keep things from him. “Logan?”
“Yeah?”
“I need help. I’m trying to do it all, but there’s two of them and they’re outnumbering me. I haven’t folded their laundry, I haven’t washed ours, and all I want to do is sleep.”
“Okay. We’ll get you help. First, I’m going to be here for a couple of weeks. As in, I’m not leaving the house and Boone is going to handle everything that comes up. Between him and Simon, things will be taken care of.”
“Simon’s going to have a lot on his shoulders soon. Aren’t they meeting about their surrogate this week?”
“Not until the seventh. He’ll get things taken care of when the time comes. But for now, my bigger concern is you,” Logan said as he put Abi on his shoulder and started patting her back to burp her.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I love spending time with the babies, but I just have no energy.” Ash had finished his bottle, so I started patting his back and when he let out a huge belch, he squirmed before he smiled that milk-drunk smile that babies get. I kissed his forehead and then sighed, cherishing the moment I got to spend holding him.
“You’re not the only one tired. This is honestly worse than roundup time. Or birthing season. At least then we simply work eighteen hours and then sleep for six. This whole getting up every three to four hours is really wearing on both of us.”
I nodded in agreement. And on top of not getting any sleep, Logan had spent several days this week running around the ranch. When Scarlett started whining and took off toward the back door, Logan and I got up and carefully placed the twins in the crib.
I smiled when I walked into the kitchen with Logan right behind me. Boone was standing on the other side of the door, smiling at Scarlett, who was talking to him through the window. Logan walked around me to unlock and open the door for his brother, who came in and immediately started rubbing Scarlett’s ears. She flopped over, offering her belly in greeting. I simply rolled my eyes at her.
“I just saw you an hour ago,” Logan said as he walked over to the coffeepot and lifted the carafe, offering a cup of coffee to Boone.
“If I’m being offered coffee, I’m taking off my coat.”
“I have cake, too, if you want some. Triple-chocolate fudge cake to be exact.” I smiled at Boone, who moaned and quickly unzipped his coat. I guess that meant he was on board to stay for a bit. “Did you want to see the twins?”
“I assume they’re sleeping, so I don’t want to disturb them.”
“They are, but you can still go see them. I don’t want everyone to think they’re not welcome, Boone. I simply—”
“Hey, I get it, Rhett, and I’m right there with you. I love my parents, but yeah, Mom will definitely bulldoze her way in and try to take over. She doesn’t mean anything by it; she’s honestly just trying to help. But she doesn’t realize that she has to let us kids learn how to do things on our own.”
“I’m so glad you said that because that’s exactly what I told her the other day.”
“Uh-oh. Do I want to know?” Boone asked, looking between the two of us.
“We came home from the hospital and their five-day checkup. Mom, Dad, Aunt Cammie, and Uncle Sam were all in the house, just making themselves at home. Aunt Cammie called later and apologized; she honestly didn’t know Mom wasn’t supposed to still have a key.”
Boone cringed, and I made myself busy getting cake. “See, that’s the difference with Kait’s parents. When they came after each of the girls were born, they didn’t take over. They didn’t do anything until we asked. But when we needed them, they were there.”
“That I’d be okay with. Unfortunately, Mom seems upset with me because I said something,” Logan told Boone.
“Is that why they went back to Texas already?” Boone asked, I gasped, and Logan cringed. He hadn’t told me they’d left. But that would be why they hadn’t been by to see the twins since Saturday when Logan shooed them out.
“Sweetheart, I was going to tell you. It’s not your fault, so don’t even go there,” Logan said, holding up his hands trying to, I don’t know, what, calm me? I threw a glare at my husband before I plopped the cake pan down on the island and walked off. “Rhett, wait. Boone, don’t leave,” Logan said as he followed behind me.
I was faster, though, and had too much of a head start. Only I forgot something important. Logan had a key to his office door. I threw a dirty look his way when he opened the door.
“Were you going to tell me at all? I need a few minutes, Logan. What does your family think about me now? The crazy, unstable freak Logan married and now he won’t let them near their own grandkids.”
“Rhett, don’t.”
“No, Logan. Don’t tell me to don’t. You can’t say they all look at me like I’m normal. I have a service dog for fuck’s sake.”
“Yes. And she helps you. She’s there for you. Look,” Logan said as he pointed to Scarlett, who was leaning heavily on my leg. That was all it took, and I broke. It was too much, and I simply couldn’t keep everything in anymore.
“I can’t, Logan. I don’t want to hurt anyone, and you’re pushing your family away for me. That’s not fair.” I looked at Logan through blurry eyes, and I completely broke when he wrapped me up in his arms. In his arms was always where I felt safest, felt whole, and I needed him more than anything right now.