Chapter 4
Emma
After the cookout, Ryan drove me back to my house. I had a little too much to drink, but I didn't want him to leave.
"Would you like to come in for some coffee?"
"What about Sierra? Is she with a babysitter?"
"She's inside. You can meet her. I'm sure she will like you."
His brows furrowed slightly, and he appeared concerned. I was sure he wondered why I would invite him in with my baby girl inside. I quickly unlocked the door and led him into my house, not wanting to give him a chance to leave.
Sierra came running down the hall. She stopped short for a second; I assured her he was okay, and she ran up to him to say hello in her own way.
"Ryan meet Sierra … Sierra, Ryan."
"So, this is Sierra?" His relief was evident in his posture as he bent down to pet Sierra, my seventy-pound white shepherd.
"This is your baby girl?" Shaking his head, he continued petting Sierra, who was already loving him.
"Yes, of course, what did you think?"
"You know what I thought. You have been playing me,” he said, smiling playfully as he walked toward me. I turned and hurried into the kitchen before he reached me. I knew if he kissed me, we would never make it to the kitchen. I discarded the idea of coffee and opened a bottle of chardonnay.
"Wine, beer, or I have some Jägermeister if you prefer?" I offered.
"Jägermeister? Leftovers from a past boyfriend?" he asked, not waiting for an answer. "Sure, Jäger sounds good."
Ryan was right. Michael drank Jäger, and I had always kept some around for him.
I reached into the upper cabinet, confident Ryan watched me from behind as I retrieved a shot glass from the shelf. Our fingers touched as I handed him his drink. I felt a surge of excitement stream through my body. The look in Ryan's eyes as we touched was sensual and raw. I was sure he was feeling the same thing.
Ryan downed his shot and took my wine from me, setting both glasses on the counter.
Backing me against the wall, he interlaced his fingers with mine and raised my arms above my head. Kissing me, he opened my mouth with his tongue and began exploring. With each second, his kiss grew harder, stronger, and more passionate.
My insides were shaking, and when he leaned in closer, pressing his body firmly against mine, I knew any plans I had of playing hard to get had been rendered impossible. The butterflies were back, and they were fluttering their little wings at the speed of light, keeping my insides in turmoil.
The night had been destined to end up here. Any attempt on my part to pretend differently would ring false. It had been a while since I had sex. Michael and I broke it off a few months ago. If I was going to indulge in my first one-night stand, I was going to enjoy it.
Ryan ran his hand down my side until he reached the bottom hem of my dress. Pushing my sundress up, he ran his fingers lightly across my inner thighs. I held my breath, enjoying the sensation as his fingers traveled slowly toward their destination. Reaching my panties, he ran one finger over the thin material, teasing me. I squirmed underneath his touch, desperately wanting him to push my underwear to the side so I could feel the warmth of his fingers against my skin. Without warning, he removed his hand, letting my dress fall back into place.
"No … please don't stop." I needed him inside me. Did he not feel the same level of intensity?
"Not yet," Ryan taunted, flashing that now infamous half-smile that made my panties drip. He released my arms, which he had been firmly holding with his hand, and turned my body around so I was now facing the wall.
What was he doing?
I began to turn back around, but he moved in closer, placing his hand on my back. He unzipped the back of my dress while his lips floated over the nape of my neck. Pulling the spaghetti straps over my shoulders, he let my dress fall to the floor. So sensual. Better than I could have fantasized.
He took a step back and directed me to stay. Standing there, facing the wall, I could feel his eyes studying me. I was so aroused. My breathing grew heavier at the sound of his boots against the wood floor as he walked toward me.
"You're so hot." His breath tickled my ear as he ran his fingers over my shoulders and down my arms, leaving a trail of goose bumps behind. While I was still facing the wall, he spread my legs with his palm, and his hand returned to seducing my inner thigh. I closed my eyes, barely aware of my surroundings. I was wet and pulsating, anticipating the moment when I would finally feel his touch inside me.
But it didn't happen. He stopped. Releasing me, he stepped away again.
Are you frigging kidding me?
I wanted to scream. His teasing had become a torturous pleasure. I wanted him so badly I no longer gave any thought as to what happened after. All that mattered was now, this moment.
"Turn around so I can see all of you." The forcefulness of his words was new and exciting.
The thin straps and low-cut sundress had prevented me from wearing a bra. I turned to face Ryan, naked except for my panties. He handed me my glass and stepped back, standing there, staring like a wolf at his prey. I took a sip of wine and set the glass on the counter.
"Take off your underwear," he instructed.
"Oh no, your turn. You need to at least take off your shirt." I giggled a nervous laugh, trying to make light of my almost nakedness while he stood there still fully dressed.
Ryan's face changed, his body tensing. His voice sounded deeper and more commanding. "Em, I want you to slowly pull your panties down to your knees." There was no doubt he was letting me know he wanted control.
My need for sexual release overpowered my judgment. I would have done almost anything just to feel him inside me. I pulled my panties to my knees while he watched. The act of pulling my undies down on his command while he brazenly stared at me felt empowering. I saw my own sexuality being reflected back to me through his eyes. Standing naked before Ryan, I felt raw, exposed, vulnerable, and sexy as hell.
The night had just begun, and Ryan had already brought me to a level of excitement I had never before experienced. His deliberate teasing and withdrawing. The animalistic desire that shone in his eyes every time he stepped away to look at me. He had brought me to that place of no return. Even if it was just for the night, I was his, and he knew it.
Once again, he moved toward me. His smoldering gaze traveled up my body, moving so slowly I felt like he was imprinting a picture of me into his brain one pixel at a time.
When his eyes finally reached mine, his expression was soft and confident. Parting my legs, he inserted his finger, allowing his thumb to caress my outer region. I gasped as my body and mind reacted simultaneously to feeling his touch finally inside me. I couldn't hold back. Tremors of joy took over me as I orgasmed. I was so aroused by the thought of sex that all it took was for him to touch me and I came. Until tonight, I wouldn’t have believed that was possible.
"Ryan, I need a moment …" I begged as he began massaging.
"Shh, just enjoy." His voice was soft and passionate.
My body started to react and began moving with the rhythm of his fingers. "Oh God, Ryan please, please fuck me."
He pulled my underwear down the rest of the way. "Which way to the bedroom?" he asked as he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.
Was he really going to carry my naked body over his shoulder like some primitive caveman? Cavewomen probably had some really hot sex!
Laying me on the bed, he pulled my knees up and spread my legs, putting all of me in full view. He unbuttoned his shirt, revealing his well-toned chest. His broad shoulders and long torso were even sexier than my mind had imagined. I sat up to reach for him.
"Stay," he commanded, gently pushing me back down, his voice stern and controlling. His eyes demonstrated his hunger as they roamed over my bare skin and between my legs.
"Let me fuck you the way I want … the way you want." His piercing eyes saw through me. His words resonated inside me, arousing me at a primal level. I felt consumed with opposing emotions of lust and vulnerability. God, I wanted this man!
Removing the rest of his clothes, Ryan stood naked in front of me, and I was in awe. He was roughly six feet and in excellent shape. Strands of his wavy dark brown hair fell across his face, playing against his emerald eyes. So. Fucking. Sexy.
His huge cock scared me, though I was so wet I was confident I could handle it.
He knelt at the edge of the bed and pulled my hips toward him, opening my legs. "So fucking beautiful," he whispered, right before his tongue reached me. Gliding over me, spreading me apart, licking and stimulating my clit.
Any ability to form a coherent thought left me as he simultaneously put one and then a second finger inside me, moving slow and easy. Every nerve ending in my body screamed for release. Ready to come again, my mind begged my body to hold off. I didn't want to lose this feeling.
"Ryan, I'm going to …"
"It's okay, Em, let go. Let me taste you." I did. Waves of pure ecstasy ran through my body, making me shiver.
Unfortunately, my emotions were riding the crest of my orgasm, experiencing the same ripple of highs and lows. I feared my happiness would soon be crushed under that ocean of joy and left to drown. I already knew that this one night would not be enough for me and hoped he felt the same.
While I was still pulsating from my orgasm, Ryan pushed himself inside me—hard. His stiff, warm cock rubbed my swollen outsides and pounded my insides.
"I've wanted to fuck you all day, to be inside you, to feel you." The tenderness of his voice added to my arousal as he pulled back and thrust himself into me again.
I grabbed his back with my legs. As I felt the pressure build in him, my own body throbbed, begging for another release. We came together in one violent, life-changing explosion. I lay there wondering what just happened. Back-to-back orgasms. Unquestionably the best sex ever. Ryan did all the work, but I was exhausted. My body limp and relaxed, I fell asleep.
***
When I woke up, Ryan was lying on his side, caressing me. Sierra was watching us from the bottom of the bed. I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was 5:00 AM.
"Hi," I murmured, looking up at Ryan.
Kissing my forehead, he brushed the hair from my face. "Hi,” he whispered. Go back to sleep, it's still early."
I closed my eyes, not wanting to think about all the things we both had avoided the past seventeen hours. I spent most of the day and all of the night with him without asking a lot of personal questions. I was afraid of the answers. I drifted back into a peaceful slumber, leaving those answers for another day … or never.
As the sun filtered into my bedroom, I sat up and opened my eyes to find Sierra lying next to me but Ryan nowhere in sight. For a minute, I couldn't breathe. Had he gotten up and left while I was sleeping? No! It can't be over. I'm not naïve. I understood this was supposed to be a one-night stand, but after last night that was a reality I was no longer willing to face.
I lay back down, burying myself under the covers willing myself not to cry. Damn, I'm an idiot!
A few minutes later, I heard a loud bang as the front door shut. Sierra jumped off the bed when Ryan walked into the room. I let out a deep breath and peeked out from under the sheets. My exuberance at seeing him was hard to hide.
"Morning. Would you like some coffee?” he asked. "I saw a place down the road when we drove in last night, so I got us some coffee and muffins."
"Sure." I pulled the sheet around me as I got out of bed.
"After last night, you're going to act all shy on me? Drop the sheet."
I blushed and let go of the sheet.
"I need to be in you. Now. I'll make it up to you later," he said, wrapping his arms around me.
All I heard was later. There was going to be a later! The little girl inside my head began jumping up and down, clapping and shouting, “Yay!”
Ryan was out of his clothes in seconds. He was already hard. Brushing my lips with his, he pushed me onto the bed and entered me with an urgency. Being both the recipient and the cause of his erection excited and comforted me.
Thrusting hard, his eyes locked with mine. I was lost in a forest of emerald green that reflected a longing screaming of desire, need, and loneliness. His kiss was hungry but tender. I wondered if he was caught up in the same volcanic mix of conflicted emotions and passion that I was.
"Now, Em,” he said. “Come now!"
We came together. Afterward, Ryan lay inside me, breathing heavy, stroking my hair, never taking his eyes off me.
"Damn, Emma, what you do to me …" He shook his head. What I do to him? Every nerve in my body was tingling. I smiled and touched his face. I don't think I've ever felt so fulfilled and happy.
What I said aloud was, "Shower. I need a shower."
"I would join you, but I'm not sure either one of us could handle it right now," he said, laughing.
The warm water pulsating against my skin soothed me into a complacency that I knew wasn't real. Where was this going? Will he want to see me again? What if he doesn't?
As I dried off, I felt anxiety and tension growing. The man waiting somewhere outside my bathroom door—hopefully—currently held the power in this relationship … or whatever this was. Not a feeling I was comfortable with.
I walked into the kitchen wearing my robe. Ryan sat at the table looking at his phone, his face distraught.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Nothing …" He shook his head, avoiding my eyes. "How do you like your coffee?"
"No problem, I'll fix it." I grabbed the Styrofoam cup and added cream and sugar and sat at the table wondering what happens next.
He stared at me for a minute before saying anything. "You're are so beautiful, and this was so amazing."
Fuck, here it comes. I was trying not to tear up and act like some silly girl.
"Em, I have to leave sooner than I planned. Can I call you?"
I felt my expression grow defensive. "From where? Where is it you're going and where will you be when you call me?"
"I'll be in Chicago."
"Not Colorado Springs?"
"No, I have an emergency in Chicago, but I promise I will call you."
"Yeah, sure, of course, I understand." Still acting defensively and much less cavalier than I had hoped. I got up and prepared Sierra's food and set her dish down. "I'll need to take Sierra for her morning run in a few minutes."
This morning, when we made love—no, fucked—I thought we had a connection beyond chemistry. I was wrong. I guess all he wanted was one more roll in the hay before he exited out of my life.
Ryan picked up his keys and put his phone in his pocket. "Thanks, babe. I'm sorry, really. I’ll call you." He kissed me on the forehead then left.
He kissed me on my fucking forehead! He couldn't even give me a real kiss goodbye! I knew I'd never see him again. Hell, I still didn't know his last name!