I wake to the sound of Ethan talking to someone. Around four o’clock in the morning, I fell asleep in his arms, and now he has his back to me, muttering words I have to strain to make out. I check the clock on the nightstand and sigh. Five thirty. I have to get up for work in one hour. Fuck. Rolling onto my side, I get comfortable and run my fingers down Ethan’s muscular arm.

“Erik,” he whispers, his voice growing louder as he repeats himself. “Let me drive.” A beat passes before he says, “One more stop.”

His body shakes beneath my hand as if he’s scared. Why does the name Erik sound familiar? It takes me a few minutes to mull it over before I recall the articles I had read years ago. Ethan had a twin brother who had died when he was sixteen. Because of his parents’ money and connections, there were only a few articles online about the accident, though the details were limited.

Each paper that covered the news had the same story to report. Boston teen killed in fatal car crash. Ethan supposedly had no memory of the night, which I’d always assume was the reason he never spoke of his brother.

My heart breaks for Ethan, unsure of whether I should wake him or allow him to keep dreaming of his brother. If I had lost Will, I don’t know how I would get through a day without thinking of him. I want to wrap my arms around him and hug him from behind, envelop him in my warmth.

He grunts a few times, throwing up his left arm as if shielding his face. Then, he curls into a ball, a soft whimper escaping his lips. With his left hand on his head, he covers his eye. I get on my knees and stare down at him, wondering if I should do something.

He’s digging his fingers into the scar over his left eyebrow. Ethan scratches and scrapes, his fingernails cutting through his flesh. A few dots of blood stain his tanned skin, and that’s when I decide to pull him from his awful nightmare.

“Ethan.” I raise my voice to a higher octave. “Ethan, wakeup.” I shake his shoulder. “C’mon, Ethan. Come back to me.”

He stops thrashing for a split second, before he rolls over and squeezes his arms around me, pinning me against the mattress. His eyes are still closed. A single tear rolls down his cheek. Ethan molds my body against his, his arms so strong and muscular that I cannot escape his grip.

I struggle to break free, without much success, and yell his name. He opens his eyes, his breathing ragged and shallow. The hollowness in his eyes slices right through me. The bright green irises that I have gotten lost in since I was a kid are soulless pits. My Ethan is gone, replaced by the man lost inside his mind. We don’t speak. The silence between us is maddening.

He rolls me onto my side and slides his hand up my bare thigh. All night we fucked and fucked until neither of us could move. I passed out in his arms, comforted by his touch and his breath on my neck. Each breath he took coaxed me into a trance, bringing me closer to sleep, until the painful tone of his voice ripped me from my slumber.

His fingers slip inside me just long enough to test my slickness, before he pulls them back. The emptiness left from his fingers makes me crave more. He doesn’t say a word, only takes what he wants. Slamming my ass into his now erect cock, he pulls me closer. Ethan grips my ass cheek and runs his long and thick cock along my folds. I am so wet for him, dripping. How did that even happen?

One minute, I was concerned for his safety, the next he has me spread open and thrusting his cock inside me. My juices coat his sensitive skin, the pressure building within me. He slides his hand behind my head and grabs me by the throat, his fingers dancing along my skin. The amount of pressure he applies doesn’t bother me. With both of us on our sides, he raises his leg to cover his over mine, sliding himself deeper inside me.

“Mine,” he growls into my ear.

“Yes,” I purr, my eyes rolling into the back of my head from pure pleasure. “Yours.”

I will be anything he wants me to be.

The pressure builds within, my insides so tight and ready to burst when a rush of heat takes over my body. “Ethan,” I moan.

“Come for me, my little lamb.” He squeezes my throat to feel my pulse beneath his fingers. A smile touches his lips that I can feel pressed against the other side of my neck. “Come on my cock, coat my skin with your juices. Let me feel you. Give me your orgasm.”

I tighten my hold on his cock, and he groans. He knows how close I am and has me right where he wants. Moving his hand from my throat to my chin, he cups my cheek and runs his thumb along my bottom lip. I stick out my tongue to taste the saltiness of his skin. He growls against the shell of my ear and pulls my lip down to shove his finger inside. The harder I suck, the harder his fucks me, our movements so perfectly in sync with one another.

After I come, Ethan pulls out and flips me over and onto my stomach. He grabs my hips, positioning me how he wants, and takes me from behind. I press my cheek to the soft mattress and scream louder each time he pumps into me. Unlike before, he’s more violent, more forceful. But I don’t care. I like this carnal side to Ethan, though I can’t help but wonder what had turned him into such a ravenous beast.

Pain surges through my body, searing into my skin when he digs his fingers into my hip. He moves the other hand up to my shoulder and pulls me back so that he can stare into my eyes. His body slaps violently against mine as he takes what he wants from me. Each thrust a silent promise of more.

When Ethan smacks my ass cheek, I yelp from the extreme pain that sends a tremor up the right side of my body.

“Quiet,” Ethan barks. His tone is harsh and cold. “Don’t make a fucking sound.” He whacks me again, this time on the other cheek.

Red-hot pain blinds me, causes my vision to blur. This is the Ethan who returned to me after all those years. He’s different, devoid of any emotion, a hollow shell of the boy I once knew. What had changed him? What had made him into this man? Maybe he just likes rough sex. Maybe this is payback for all the years of fighting with him. But he deserved my hatred. He deserved every bit of my frustration. Now, I’m lapping up his anger, driven to the edge by his madness.

My insides clench around him, and I come again. This time, a series of orgasms wreck me one after another, commanding authority over my body. Of all the men I have been with—which is not many—I never had sex like this. No one had ever fucked me with this much aggression and passion. My Ethan, the man I am so desperately trying not to love, with his calloused hands and big cock, manhandles me, fucks me into submission. I’m ruined, destroyed for all men.

Holding me tighter, he goes deeper and deeper. He doesn’t speak, communicating with me through a series of grunts that set my body on fire. After so many orgasms and the pain he has caused me to get there, I am numb all over. It’s as if my body is floating above me, completely detached from the high Ethan has given me. Once again, I come undone, with Ethan right behind me. His cock pulses inside me, leaving me with an empty feeling when he sits back and fists his cock in hand.

He coats my bruised ass cheeks with his cum. The warm liquid runs down my thighs. I moan, he grunts, both of our screams of passion ripped from our throats.

“What a beautiful sight,” he says, out of breath. “Your ass dripping with my cum. Now, there’s no denying it. You are mine.”

Ethan marked me with his cum, claimed me as his. But he doesn’t do relationships. We were only supposed to test the waters. Is this progress?

He touches my hip with his long fingers for a brief second. “Stay just like this. Don’t move.”

The mattress dips from the loss of his weight. I glance over my shoulder to watch him walk into the bathroom. A minute later, he comes back into the bedroom with a washcloth in his hand. He takes his time cleaning me up as if he wants this part to last longer than necessary.

I don’t mind, not even in the slightest. I had dreamed of this moment for years, imagined it for so long that I thought the day would never come.

Once he’s pleased with his work, Ethan throws the towel on the nightstand and hooks his arms around my middle. He wraps all six feet four inches of himself around me, cradling my head against his chest. We lay like that for about five minutes in complete silence.

“Are we going to talk about your nightmare?”

He presses his lips to my shoulder. “No.”

“Ethan,” I protest.

He covers my mouth with his hand. “No, not now. Just go back to sleep.”

I peel his fingers from my face, and he drops his hand to my side. “I can’t. I have to get up for work soon.”

“Until then, you can stay like this. With me. Don’t fight me, Mia. You know how much that turns me on.”

I do. And I cannot deny that his need to control me turns me on. I succumb to his wish, and once I give in to him, his body relaxes. He loosens his grip on me, allowing me enough room to readjust my arm to get comfortable.

“We have an appointment later.” He says the words against the shell of my ear. His hot breath sends chills throughout my body. “Don’t forget. I’ll send a car to pick you up from work.”

I attempt to look over my shoulder at him, but his massive body keeps me from being able to shift my weight. “What appointment?”

“With my personal shopper at Boyds.”

I laugh. “You were serious about that? I only told Will okay to get him off my ass.”

“I want to take care of you, Mia. Stop fighting me. You deserve everything I have to offer you and more. I hate seeing you live the way you do. Let me spoil you. If you are mine, and you are, then you will take everything I have to give.”

“Okay,” I croak. “It’s just clothes. Why not? Show me what it’s like to live in your world.”

He brushes the hair from my face and plants a kiss on my cheek. “Close your eyes and get some sleep. You will need your strength for later.”

I do as he commands. My eyelids are heavy from all the fucking we did all night and this morning. The alarm on my phone will wake me up. So, I drift back to sleep, dreaming of the man who consumes every one of my waking thoughts.